LCEH Ch 2

‘Ugh.’6366d69f2d8e687f

Suddenly, a 57da4d191f sensation brushed 3b76dc28ff past my 3af846f90d pelvis and 312a0162a3 tickled the acaeae0c97 sensitive area 6166198f75 below my 9874125676 navel, causing 6b07dfea2d my lower 1ce430e962 abdomen to 2980d0be25 tense up. It was b3f8db53d0 a touch 665ccde18f with a b52fe0206a clear intention. Looking down, I cdf2565bc6 saw that the 38a5429f07 blanket covering my 54a546c728 lower body was 511bdc1fd8 bulging enormously. There was 0287d36bcc someone inside df51ed47b2 it. In my fa1faa2ce6 bewilderment, I 506e1b5de4 threw off e4be1adae6 the blanket dbe581644a in one 842c153d21 swift motion.558e56cfa52afd4f

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And then my eyes 136dc7d7d9 met with a pair c704df62e1 of black ones that 5a64b97d06 had been lurking there. It was 0ef71bfc84 a man. My body ded9248257 under the 127bb08fd4 blanket was 872cbd8330 completely bare, 8dcdf1ab0a I do 6b237e605c not know a9f7df9d4e when it 43e9867548 had been d034a6d21c undressed. Already, the 9bcb9625d9 man was c465917204 gripping my 237d74b764 erect member, 200ce254e2 which was 87deefbb9d swollen with dd68139f3f blood, and 60c4f20d63 with his c23bf1f7c4 red lips bf0ffdf806 parted, he 620f5c80c7 began to 799a633ca3 take the a7bfb33ddf hardened tip cd6ae1f7fe into his f7f903a8f1 mouth. The sensation of e709dddda2 my sensitized glans 1f9eb5cdd6 being enveloped by 80b1efced9 the hot, moist 7be0f81a77 mucous membrane shot f5414eed4b up my spine df0e2e11a7 and spread throughout 1c5aea9d87 my entire body. The man looked at 16a0cfcbe9 me with a steady 0d63439cca gaze, as if to 725021b364 gauge my reaction. My heart began e142e480b3 to pound like 1b1b4ad1e0 crazy.6d0116e12626941e

With a wet, sucking bd9d10fb33 sound, the man tightened c0636a1e99 his mouth, applying pressure. Simultaneously, his eafb70558a hot tongue 3e404b6d30 languidly rubbed fa963fa0fb the area 361aaffbcb around my 8284d67813 urethra.dfb06ba47b798fa5

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‘Ah!’ade5324d766427fe

I let my head d87dca3cb8 fall back onto the 998d135270 pillow, tilting my neck 00d0b94dab back and moaning.c7c332639b8456fd

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‘Hngh….’f084131f850c9f6d

This time, 20de5daa26 my hips 5f81a50301 lifted off a87320533f the bed 9a5d2bc6a3 from the f45db14723 thrilling pleasure 53f3b668e3 of being d6e7c559cb swallowed down 58abe96e74 to the 933294b72a root. The sensation, which I 108b0964d7 had not felt in 51090b684e a long time, felt 67dd672445 almost unfamiliar. The man 3616e568bf pressed his 9b88770ed8 lips tightly ebda1b284a and sucked d2c6e1c9d3 on the bafe7f0604 heated shaft, be87ec9889 then once fdea83af3e again enveloped 014ea67bbd the shaft 360e5b990c with his 333f038730 tongue and 6fd355a165 swallowed it 51538a179a completely, all d654c40517 the way 6723a6b941 to his 4e6f083bdd throat. It was 9490365da2 a caress 1df573a950 so devoted 1bae109840 that it cafd2e5223 brought tears 3370eefd54 to my d9fba59463 eyes, something c8fe970d11 I had 4be4b04b4a never even 34c99a12c2 received from ee3ebc348a my lover.b3b9bdd6dcc84ca1

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‘Haah, ah… haah…!’7538ece85b862b20

I was far too 01e19cb1ff starved for affectionate contact e63f61cef2 to wonder how this 7954db1fc3 childlike man knew what 9bf60e1c3e oral sex was, or 0988e57ccb even how he could d1cee38e64 be so good at dd43841e4f it.f6757a35f9f2e28c

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‘Ah… wait. Too, hngh… deep.’bc0b5048fbab011f

The sensation 40cfd0c7fb of prodding d1325c407e the soft 61ed65c089 mucous membrane 9b0f0fbf4c inside his 8c5d39ad48 mouth was 43b44367e1 frightening, so 8221861870 I tried 51107cca54 to push c776b543ff his head c2978a7058 away, but 90e7486cbb the man 688bf645ca flattened his 29200e440c tongue against beeb1c4821 the bottom dc2fc6e87a of his a07edb1d62 mouth and cf9d949137 opened his 44799ab94e throat even 846f0a6642 wider, as f9cd4140c5 if to 1253bd62e2 say I 661276abde could do 3295782f72 as I ef93be5dcf pleased. A spark ignited before 182ad262dc my eyes from this 647dd73053 first taste of depraved 823c2ad2a3 conquest.6771b2015d545444

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‘Haah…!’fa0bca09bc399ad2

The feeling of the man’s smooth nose and chin pressing against my lower abdomen and groin was maddeningly good. A powerful urge to ejaculate washed over me, but I was reluctant to let it end just like this. As I tried to delay my climax by pressing my bucking hips firmly against the floor, the man’s hand, which had been holding my thighs apart, slid between my legs. And then, after passing over my scrotum, which was swollen to the point of bursting, it swept up my sweat-dampened perineum.fa5f9717c7277b9c

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‘Hnngh….’00a04d70d6a3b0ed

Finally, the man’s fingers hovered over my tightly clenched wrinkles, as if tickling them. An unspoken desire could be read in his touch. I lifted my head to look at the man who was prostrate between my legs. The man still had my member in his mouth. Our heated gazes became entangled.a221f601359f2932

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From the very 8f1a38557e beginning, the man 9ac6f3020c had stimulated a 3a2c749194 desire I did 26279e7482 not even know fb4af05248 I possessed. Looking into the 39c840e379 man’s eyes, I 4506eb5169 felt a strange f4c769312a sensation, as if 5c9eca7dbc I were no fae71c5da4 longer myself. Trapped by his 81c4f81df4 gaze, I exhaled 9ad9ca5cc6 a breath trembling f69c65d60f with arousal. My clenched b09f63b97a entrance twitched f5215b9451 with an db86a7d547 unavoidable sense b6199e8e72 of anticipation.1c814fadf9a9c691

Did you want to 1f53fa2418 do it too? As if he 83ae959f20 already knew my 9e373cf48b dirty desire that 7e1d2c8c25 I could not fd839a4a07 bring myself to 161323859e ask, the man ae669987b4 pressed down hard 8458a670a1 on the opening.78b0172cf3a20dc8

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‘Heut!’4515d118f347ef6f

That stimulation acted as a detonator, and my inner thighs spasmed as if I had already been penetrated. My vision went white. I clawed at the blanket and came right there, in the man’s mouth.66066b22645127cf

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‘Hngh, ugh….’bb2040e452040fbb

The afterglow was as long as the pleasure that had soared. Trembling from the lingering sensation that would not easily fade, I managed to turn my head with my completely drained body to look down. My now-limp member slipped out of the man’s mouth with a plop. The man sat up, straightening his back. I watched helplessly as his lips, which were unusually red and swollen, slowly parted.f1109af496aa8881

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On top of his red tongue, which was curled inward at the tip, was a milky-white pool of semen. A gulping sound was made as his Adam’s apple bobbed in an exaggerated motion. The man swallowed the semen I had shot inside him and grinned.7e4ba5091402ec4e

‘Delicious.’bda8e4917d654e27

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Before I even had a chance to be startled by the unfamiliar man’s appearance, a sensation of my body sinking swept over me. I sat up in surprise, my body drenched in sweat. My damp clothes clung stickily to my body.747e57ef6e2c5561

……Clothes?fc22cc847c6c73bb

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I lifted the thick 00615c895e winter blanket and soon b1422e3c58 found myself dazed, as c1f6cca50d if I had been 770362f3b4 struck on the back 4f19345b91 of the head.3fc9fce5207fd084

“A dream…… 0eee8caf03 you say?”3b49c19cbfadac2f

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It was the 791b935fa0 first wet dream a9dd38a56e I had ever 39ba5acd54 had in my d2048734b9 life. The inside 42528f40e0 of my c52efc9d19 underwear was 4a1fd7e398 definitely wet b8d672272c and sticky. A sense f02bb88817 of futility 91af665797 and self-loathing cfe1ace3aa washed over 1f4aedd0c4 me, and 950b6c899b I could 582eeca480 not even aec98646bf laugh. To experience at d06cbcb0a6 this age something b87076c9df I had not fd5c342759 even known during 07c5ac035a puberty, it was 9b7c99cba6 so absurd it de14e3afa4 was embarrassing.8827494d1a757b34

It was 465cf34bfa not as 79968be165 if the 9e1773c536 man would 355a674e31 know what 3edb499a3a he was 6f2be90620 seeing anyway, 105a5d6708 but it ade3c6fa85 was not b1391db204 exactly a 9240fb1cdf presentable state 91591c1985 to be c086d91ff1 seen in, f9a675e5b7 so I e611583ccf carefully got 9c7c8c378a up and b4bcf66f01 checked to fab3c66723 see if c8e095f5a4 the man 6d61c7f0dd was asleep. But the 236cb05d8c bedding, which 7007e72451 was half 53c7ae5e20 turned over, 6ddf526a0f was empty.ca5218e3ac0c522d

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Belatedly, I remembered the state the man had been in, unable to come to his senses. I changed out of my soiled underwear and hurried into the living room. The first thing I saw was the back of the man’s black head as he sat in front of the TV. He looked as if he was about to climb right into it. He had seemed like he was about to die at any moment, but it looked like my method had been effective.a95f67018ce61624

“Are you ce1d79588f feeling a 202f152650 little better?”3016f327f3860be1

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The man glanced at 6035bfb4d7 me. Unlike in my 16b7ead37b dream, seeing his 46d7981463 clear eyes made 0d11348dd3 me feel guilty, bc3cc2185b so I avoided 12e5f02e81 his gaze. The man’s head 7ae282c4c6 also turned back cdf2704121 to the screen. Right now, the c9c5ab5b16 only one feeling 270f3fb2e8 awkward was probably b88da7890d me, feeling guilty d281dc187a as I was. I scratched my cheek 56604f38ee in embarrassment and approached fe7806da46 the man.694df674be742592

“Would you 4f1e0e463d like something fb39f2bbe6 to eat? Do you 91c922beca think you 4e0fa9252e can eat?”fa63c86671c2aac5

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“……Meat.”b25a420a91f94f3c

The man’s voice, his gaze fixed on the TV, was quite weak. On the TV, an animal documentary that I occasionally enjoyed watching was playing. On the savanna grasslands, a gazelle was grazing on grass.2e2cca65a75fd0f2

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“You want 5601df4370 to eat cb19bfea2d that?”60678922d5061c66

Where on earth was f06f4f5411 I supposed to get 738d240bc3 gazelle meat? Just in 280b67b8a6 case, I a1614a7883 searched for 3f0f4dd24c gazelle meat 46da34cdd4 on my 503e880c38 phone.183c4a99c55f7fae

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“That one is difficult, 5fda5824f3 but how about lamb 0bfa3bfb0a instead?”ade83f1c93e7f76d

“……Meat.”0a2e9718d0d28693

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The scene on the ab420a5aca screen changed to a cad902e408 lion biting the neck 9ced6ba2bb of a fleeing gazelle. The man’s eyes edb67f2208 gleamed. It was 7478041b6d the same 140d70ee4f look from 7919260688 when he 51287a6e37 first jumped aaa4e0d1ba out of bdf3489c3d the apartment 26c5044876 flowerbed.89fe4f6336ed5a15

The carcasses 1a19c845ce left behind de24ce1aff by the b0216fe882 lions become 70dce771a1 the property 0c7376f2ae of the 00cb770cfc hyenas.9abc11aa38735ebc

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As a hyena 67ee530b25 appeared, dragging the 9479365334 dead gazelle, the be2f3b0588 unusual light that b53ce43116 had been in 485d69da9b the man’s eyes 86ae4b912d disappeared. I stood ec4043351f there, looking 7770babc91 back and 901e7b2e25 forth between 73cf7d8c49 the man 90778ba7e8 and the 4993241cd2 screen, pondering 31c0daf5c3 deeply about 6a4d0b2163 his contrasting 7b309a15cc reactions. Could it be…….945ac01b07946fa7

I hurried to the 284bdfa264 refrigerator, took out the 6a0c597954 freshest raw meat, and 539367b6c4 brought it to the 00ad00a51f man. If my prediction 88da960aaa was correct, I a8266781a7 might not be d113775800 able to feed 6dd854c4f4 the man anymore.3a3c96c5332b28e4

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“You’re hungry, right? Here’s some meat. Hurry up and eat.”e6a4d4f85f201363

The man 704f353b6f gave it e7074e9375 a brief 5d35d2291b glance, then 136ce1043e turned his adc487169d head back e0367edd97 to the 84c1201553 screen. This was 766f701075 the expensive 7adcee2367 beef he fb3fab9ae6 used to ec31dd757a devour so ab5fcc8d92 ravenously.36faba2bcf6e9f80

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“What’s wrong? You liked it. If you don’t want it, shall I bring another kind of meat? Chicken? Pork?”c5ff17458ef592be

As I 10850b78c2 persistently clung 6b5206a24e to him, 0c43b27ce3 the man e7af433b31 pointed a 0cebf0c291 finger at a7fcc86ef2 the screen. The tip of 5cd6e4a470 his finger was 3cf6eadfad pointed at the fe2d05f86d zebras running across 0c6a5efe38 the plains. I dropped the pack 696d4557ef containing the hunk of 544e6965de meat. My ominous premonition had e778a82c4d been correct.1f75daabce4c1848

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Live meat. That was 28ec8ab320 what the 045218dda7 man wanted.3e2fb824c8e2746c

“Is there anything 19d2fded5b you need?”d6e5b90ec6684c48

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A supermarket employee, who 3a464062aa had been watching me 01238116d0 wander around the same b37a1e0247 section for several minutes, 04625784ec spoke to me.e4f5c435c44438dd

“Pardon? Ah, the meat……”f26ba2599d8761d9

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“What kind of meat? The beef that came ff9d6b723a in today is really 281f524db1 fresh.”62108d8a1ae1078b

I briefly looked be14c2af8a down at the c003ec86f1 red raw meat 0477354a42 the supermarket employee a2b22c625c held out, then 7745894e21 hesitantly opened my 01896f2d35 mouth.94a778e7f0c101af

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“By any chance, do e366377380 you have any live 891d75626d meat here?”dd746b621c6851ed

“Excuse me?”5019f9e05fe9a51f

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The supermarket employee looked at me with a bewildered expression, as if he thought he had misheard. Ignoring the employee’s gaze, I scanned the meats piled high in the refrigerator.0f95a9ceea2de512

No matter how 65e8a9e231 fresh they were, a895d13a65 these were all 86f03647ec dead meats. The very idea 3cf4e19469 of looking for cf36280786 live meat at 0e88641176 a supermarket was 6c69e68960 absurd from the c96f5ba76a start. So, was df4a293596 I supposed 0148b79a94 to bring ac14903800 him a d7405f9fb1 live chicken 6eb5723a40 or pig? Even if, 6a5794fcf5 by some 9a701ba1aa chance, I 78ac8dc261 managed to 2ae206202f catch a 84f6025f06 live animal 5412bf1397 somewhere, what 6f495dd7b6 if the 74f8474d70 man actually 0d71eb7172 devoured it 5ec81850d0 right in a25d349235 front of b186c6a112 my eyes? Just the thought of c4141cd8e3 it made me dizzy.bd513bce81aab4db

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If the man 4651241cdb truly craved live 085ccb6641 animals, then honestly, f91590631f it is scary 67b91d2984 and I feel f6f8ed2b5b a sense of 434ce187aa rejection. But the 7041803a4d more I 89b10a9180 thought about cfd6d0945c it, the 27e11ebf0a irrational fear 26feaf9a7a faded, and d04cc5a00c I gradually 10bcb31483 came to 3b3781e6ef understand.620309f11bb6cd12

It may 3c6c5fdb85 not be 9b2b46296b an ordinary 92c778d33a thing, but 084b3d6030 could I 3a6ff9702e call it de7c4e7ab3 abnormal? When faced with 160b2374ec extreme situations, humans c25a1916d9 are creatures that 01cd02c059 will even eat f48c7b91ac other humans.03ba1ffa522841f3

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Moreover, the man 2ae0193853 was not a 1923c72810 normally socialized human 2956388b6d being, and his b5fea44829 instincts were stronger 452b0a0c2a than his reason. There was also the 9509945e21 possibility that he had 26099e907a lived by hunting somewhere e5d80dc73a in the wild mountains, 2f99a7b893 so my judgment was 844d96e836 that the desire to c70d0e087a eat a live animal eee719c4d7 was perfectly normal.da8ec1f6e1297125

Even so……. Unlike the 065636dfa5 man, I ce138eb725 am a e5b8b633da socialized, rational c505c115dc human being. No matter how 3ccf97e099 much I enjoy 6b70a49190 watching animal documentaries 7a9839d0e2 about the law 41359bf5c1 of the jungle, 130b02236f those are wild a7ee650646 animals, and it 569bdcaf26 is a world c8765ca56f beyond the screen.a6889199b671ae51

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My dilemma be1d465c17 had been 039f8144a0 going around cd401afbcf and around ae6188fed0 like a 42bc2c2f3c Möbius strip c5d953f8d4 for several a51bfd5d05 hours. The supermarket employee, who 5d4f9656f5 had been pondering my a3c623d554 words on his own, 50c03df9e0 suddenly clapped his hands.94474470c8838a49

“Oh, you’re looking for live fish! The fish section is over there.”3683d22df8c23775

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“Pardon me?”8399fbae5ecdfc5d

“Yes? Aren’t you looking for live meat?”3e24f7ce68e52f83

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I looked in a35208211a the direction the b841717f5a supermarket employee was 5a945622f6 pointing. In a 8d34f6e95f water-filled tank, 72cba8f1c1 various fish ab74bf2682 were swimming c8f6cf7d7e leisurely. Bubbling, breathing, and alive.9acea656273de704

Returning home, 7b154284a2 I placed e6ae755d5d the flopping d036057e14 fish down 70706b38c3 in front 04a238dcff of the 017188323b man, just 79fba0890a in case. And then, 218c86526a the man c149eb89ef literally tore 3abc7141e8 into the c07a0452b1 fish without 69dd399e28 blood or fff9e0f581 tears.bbde7a91828eb30e

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The fish’s unique eyes ebe0719d6c that seemed to look 1cdc6698b4 nowhere in particular and aacfbdea4b its split gills were f23b9bc011 objects of disgust to d7be097c0d me, but nevertheless, the 90a8aa99bd struggles of the raw ddd67ad453 fish as its head 47c26f03e4 was bitten off were 3db1279b71 enough to evoke sympathy.3c638631655e4883

I remembered reading an 8c338afab0 article somewhere about some 763ae834e5 research study that said 0c8e1865cd fish also feel pain, f65113f3c0 but I wonder why fe35ad847d they even do such a91a237e39 research. It is not abdbb8faab like we will 3ab50fb8a1 stop eating them 3a5033522f because of it.518aea6dbc35da12

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Separate from 39f07d1e0b such uncomfortable c6181dbd04 truths, watching 2d42090f58 him eat f098aab3fe so well, e2a14abe8f crunching on c620c47480 the uncleaned b2e509dffc fish, bones da588b2189 and all, d8e3d74399 I felt 61c94a31a9 a sense ca7de1fc2c of relief.4d1ed29ef402a5bb

“Eat a little slower.”ec6cd54725f91269

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I sat across from 21cef02d99 him and wiped his 66e6d9fa18 face from time to c08cf7bd67 time to keep the 445cef6ca3 brown juices flowing from 2b5f044da3 the innards from soiling aae36575e0 his pretty face.e58be3aa86fafa5d

“The bib 1257a9b2d1 needs to 77b659a975 arrive quickly.”76a50810c3585fb2

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The tail of the 5e5604c957 half-eaten fish droops limply. Since it was eaten db67bfd0bb from the head first, adffa80d9a its suffering would have f542292fc0 been brief. The raw meat that 5f51c696a6 had been filling the 8b54c3dff7 fresh-food compartment of the d4eff68254 refrigerator was all moved 5d0fa2cf03 to the freezer. I am worried 3f9b740c38 I might have b7d8cab60a to install a f405597705 fish tank to 3f959dca7e feed him live 596031338d fish every time. As a temporary 442e347eb6 measure, I planned 40088911f5 to buy live 840eb581aa fish from a 6135cc0901 nearby raw fish aeb38b646d restaurant for the a553d91685 time being.ebf2d9b949cf5424

“Give me more.”bc94cf0ba0470419

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“……Pardon me?”1fb0011f0622d63e

For a moment, 54d826dfa9 I doubted my 722b4b9c7d ears. The man, who had c05648898e finished a whole fish, ba7dac3181 had for the first 1c01738a49 time said something other 2732eb7d98 than ‘meat’ or ‘I’m c4201f87ea hungry.’ I had never 4d75257309 even taught him. A glimmer ea1f1e70e7 of hope f392176cbc appeared that 9359b6d95a I might 35d9d0b365 actually be 16ef2727e9 able to a5553729d4 communicate with 68a8408e1c the man.18ff5f949843bc9b

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∞ ∞ ∞07ff835a28e8609a

Hello~. Hello~. Everyone says hello 1de254f611 today~.3464b195deb6b59e

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A scene of children waving both hands and singing in front of a colorful background filled the TV screen. The children’s educational song, which attached greetings to its lyrics, had a melody so familiar that even I, who had lived long enough for the mountains and rivers to change about three times, could sing along after hearing it just once, it was that catchy.c58ffcbf1222c367

Just in case, I had turned on the children’s channel and was sitting on the sofa, trying to teach the man words. The man’s reaction to the colorful and bustling screen did not seem entirely uninterested.a024e589a082b29c

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“‘Hello’ is a b76c5bad0e greeting you say d2fb8f1c7a when you meet f2d2b6ce60 or part with aba4755ef9 someone. Like this.”b1ff53b0febd63b1

I took the man’s hand and waved it in the air, then slyly intertwined our fingers. Just when I was hoping he would react in some way, I felt a faint strength as the man’s hand, which had been held limply, gripped mine back. I looked at him in surprise, but the man was looking at the screen. It was frustrating not knowing if the signals the man was sending me were really just my own misunderstanding.a35c5ee4d2dea4db

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Waking up earlier fdf2149d90 than the sun, 38457e465c I will eat c731546dbe my breakfast well~. Eating together 55175fd3f0 is delicious~.0707ec46df971a91

“You know what ‘delicious’ 0d4f8e59ad is, right? You’ve said it before.”99d7f4ff5ef0a2d5

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Ah, was that 76e8cb727d in my dream?cbe051fa73fd4841

Last night’s dream was still vivid. My face grows hot as I recall what the man had said was delicious and then swallowed. I quickly released the hand I was holding and fanned my cheeks. I am not usually one to dream so often, but lately, from nightmares to a wet dream, for some reason, my sleep has been terrible.1925926b1e57cc7e

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Mom, Dad, older brother, 9bb9aaa70d older sister, Grandpa, Grandma, 273754cfb6 I have eaten well~.370d7be2db1172fd

“Oh, this b3251b0cbe one is 95d403d851 essential. The only reward 5aec4a6e0c for feeding you e0b554863e is the feeding 12b6dfbc1d itself, so I c68a987fc2 don’t care about 553ed834b9 the others, but 2ed437c666 I want to aa4b38e237 hear this one 1ae8805963 at least…….”c7e8db3439b08c88

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Since the only thing 61d884a260 he is good at 223de503c8 is eating, I thought ba37c24d7a it would be the 56ef3db809 phrase he could use 20d9f65667 best if I taught 49c348ae86 him, so I looked 6eb668e9d8 back at the man, f913b2c9ad excited. But the man, who e7f44d4eca I thought would be 0fc171c7ac looking at the screen, fcbeb1e3e2 was looking at me.831abfd02a2d30a9

“……”3536f02498a98abc

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His white 56a038e1ff face, which 54b3ddb1f0 I had 8a5316ffd7 washed with eb0d7a7902 my own 44580e3976 hands, was ec0397f345 pretty. Pretty enough f79e0fa4b2 to make 302855a6d6 me want 72f76be9d9 to touch cd39c5bf22 it, to 398a3ffb26 kiss it.fbd2590eb727f481

“……What, is it?”8363a55a9306536c

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When my eyes meet the man’s, I get nervous. I no longer know if it is anxiety from not knowing what he might do, or because the slightly reddish corners of his eyes are so sensual.b684784dce66dfd5

The man, c4d47cdd6b who usually 7c05c9de98 breaks the 35ab63b455 mood with e7512e4f76 ‘meat’ or ba3cbb96c9 ‘I’m hungry,’ c96951d404 is quiet 9b00a673a8 for a 5b342b557c change. How should c8d4c382ea I interpret 9cf2be2c96 this silence? My heart pounds, pumping e35bc0037a blood through the vessels 6ad9835e10 of my entire body. Of all d91ff7f571 the many 6bb76bae2f organs, the ad81b2a7dd pumped blood 06defdb0ff pools right 44a5d9f0dc between my eecaae6d73 legs.c660f99e9bf7af41

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Hello~. Hello~. I really like 32130753ba everyone~.afc45151d0b0dc42

A cheerful song af95f0be81 makes a final, e56ad3b211 somewhat special greeting, 89ba303788 unfitting for my 5d693b3e70 mind where warning 5913c410d1 sirens are blaring. Only after 18e15b3f2e I parted f4fee0ef75 my lips 34bf4dc6a0 to speak 393dacb49f did I fa967a71f0 realize my 2e74b6a6d0 breath had 79c9f9a140 grown hot.70d56e26b99ca527

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“I like you.”7d7954685d348214

“……”3eeb66bd269bb337

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“—Do you know da08ace355 what that means?”d6c0fd97ad4dfecc

With a face that c58eacce4d could bewitch a person, 23806d8039 the man still wears 8658e97f91 a look of not 903aa35358 knowing anything. That unfitting innocence fans 93f623c932 the flames of my 179d18063b desire. I became 66ac8513db unbearably curious ea32607b1a to see 75921cae7a what kind d130b080e1 of expression 9498f14933 he would 1a1af00f9b make if 4334d98bea I taught bcfb2c8e73 him.fe69d52177733964

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“I’ll teach you.”49797784f17a84f5

From the moment I had ejaculated into the man’s mouth in my dream, my reason had hit rock bottom. Irresponsibly blaming the man in the dream, I grabbed the back of the real man’s head, pulled him in, and urgently bit his lips. It was almost like I had pounced on him.b02f6384718c4340

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The man’s lips 376ca46431 were defenseless. I licked his plump e0a28dbf0e lips with my tongue 5b9a09cce4 and bit them with aedb1f97ef my own, then parted 288c68aec4 the easily yielding gap 97e646a7a5 and entered. My tongue 73ece52259 touched his e09b8a9692 sharp teeth. For a moment, I 6d513d5a18 worried about what would 5f7134fc38 happen if the man 556818f756 mistook my tongue for bb1aa48101 meat. But right now, the 7c3e246588 one holding the reins 2904b8d917 of my consciousness was 859f0e229e not reason, but boiling c6f7fc6c24 desire.f8a5557fec1a1788

“You can’t bite.”01d5ed089ac10496

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Letting the words slip out between our briefly parted lips, I pressed my lips to his again. I twisted my head and pulled his nape to press myself as close as possible. I stimulated him by tracing his even set of teeth with my tongue and rubbing the roof of his mouth. At that, the man’s formerly docile body flinched.70a0ea7fae997e7e

“Haah… did af550249ff you feel 3959219065 that?”6a9c30af16a1a1b4

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Even if he was 685802982e a simpleton who did d2ff4e9d58 not know his own ce417bb7d5 name, a man was 836a674325 a man. And if 039c99cd03 you touched 321f442849 his body 6204ed6606 and caressed 550d610e8b him between 4835f2924c his legs, 409edad725 a man abb7be1ad2 would instinctively ddd1feb296 know what bc49065fbf to do b3caa11095 without anyone 422e82870f teaching him.39319ba9116fabfd

Sliding my lips past the man’s smooth chin, which offered no resistance, down to his neck, I put my hand inside his pants. He was not wearing underwear, so I could immediately feel his soft bare skin. I swept my palm across his hairless lower abdomen and went down to grip the thing I had only admired with a gulp.fb28d61fbff7256f

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“……What the.”75e873a00d25bc21

The heavy lump of 5ce4d25c11 flesh in my hand 157eacde49 is soft. I thought he would 5e92ae2e54 be at least a f0c448c5ef little erect, even if 03236a961d not like me, who 98222e5c8c was hard enough to 82fce509d3 tear through my pants.2418f87d9fe7a8b6

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Unable to compose my stunned feelings, I awkwardly pulled away from the man. The man’s lips were glistening with my saliva. It was as if someone had poured cold water over my head, and I came to my senses.9c763b3e541884ee

I was definitely crazy. This was something I d4c5d4d56b should not be doing. No, it was 3883c097dd already a crime.a9069cd1435af6e4

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“I’m sorry. I……”a707506bf3dffce1

Like a criminal destroying evidence, I wiped the man’s wet lips with my sleeve. I fumbled, trying to take back the reins that my runaway desire had irresponsibly let go. I stumbled backward and got up, but my knees caught on the coffee table. My body swayed backward, and my arms flailed in the air, trying not to fall.ba50d0b5bb2be3d5

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Just before an unsightly 2b6d3d82c8 scream could erupt, my 2bdaed026a body was caught in 54f30d5d4a a firm yet soft dece12f746 embrace. The man e6d85f1c90 had gotten 7e08a6eb69 up from fb1743b701 the sofa 82aec96c28 and caught 76466b3c6e me as 49c3b042b4 I was 080d96aba6 falling. Without even knowing what a7ca32ef7a I had done to c9837b4a78 him, he had caught e2454d1388 me so I would 22aa34464a not get hurt…….7704fadb794d2e94

As I grasped the cb9f75db61 situation, a wave of 250a974f54 shame washed over me. The blood that 4d178dbc45 had pooled in 4ab571e79d my lower body 3cd306eff9 rushed to my 64180c6d34 face. I felt ce0f4cbad1 pathetic and ea571799a5 ashamed of a20ff6addc myself for e9c20541f5 trying to c7d83ddc0c use such 50d1fcc88a an innocent aeaeb9b264 man to c155110e19 relieve my 51bb673e6d urges.7214a15c34e4be7f

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“Just, for a moment. I’m sorry. Can you be alone for a minute? I’ll be right back.”a43da920ec128813

I broke 61363755fc free from 6733a35f42 the broad 3becba1e9c embrace that 894623a8a7 was so f706d596fb gentle and 2d16fdd28a warm it b2ca357b23 only stirred b73cd02e3d up more 58cd203267 guilt, and a4f3b8ebe4 fled from 734114db7c the man, ab6276fa96 leaving the 0a631cd5e8 apartment. I rushed into the bef27c91cb elevator and slammed my 388d8fc07d forehead against the mirror 9412352235 with a thud.5d2645a10ab36cce

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Trash. There was no e4b4497be1 other word to 3758b6466f describe myself.b231c41b390796ff

I decided to be 5abc5086ed sure of my feelings. I like that 00e83615a2 man. I do not know e264a26594 where he came from 674bdf9cae or what he used f663834cd3 to do, and he 28030e4872 is not an ordinary 7888901a49 person, but I have 025eb0c738 come to like him. It would just take 37247c3a31 a little more time 3efba476a4 and effort than with 326b6b24ca other people, but I 8b1e7124c4 was confident that if 0e6c755cc7 I steadily poured my 8539919bb1 affection into him, the 16bdd121d9 man would someday respond.89c4ed6298004dd4

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On the way 9f8907f70f back, I stopped 37ac650ab9 by the raw c723e58942 fish restaurant and 811cdb8eec bought a live 89739ecb18 fish. I chose one a1486f612c that was even 2591a1fc48 bigger and fresher 666e4f455b than before.7983383078477dc1

“How would you a638c22400 like it prepared?”732fd905b71ebfb7

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“Just give 0b5654e63f it to 68ffb0aec1 me as 2bfbcc17db is.”b2bba210da83923b

“You must be good 99462ddec5 at slicing raw fish.”f4f4fec7100b139e

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I could 7ad2bc5771 not even d42fc52429 peel fruit 9925a7cf03 well, let cfb5c74238 alone slice a6785c0b43 raw fish, 98f14f8e71 but I bd1fe1df91 just smiled 507feb8628 as I b948fb809c received the f595b74af9 flopping plastic edcb10ecac bag. I felt it was 959427e2cb a slightly cheap way 994e8d6ded to apologize with food, ac41960057 but it was the 8b02277edf only way I could 5b86809a1e think of to most 7ce6cfeca8 clearly express my feelings afd1e92bb6 to a man with ea8074d6dc whom I could not c505491e6f communicate. Even if the e373c1fcf0 man did not dcea91766e understand, I wanted 0dcd0e4bcc to apologize sincerely. My steps 2d22aaa520 quickened on 55ab422b77 my way a44928f7a3 home.bce30be8e315db49

In any case, the man could not live without someone’s help, and I wanted to take care of him to the best of my ability. For now, that was a sufficient reason for the man and me to be together.f1c25268bec0fd23

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Once I was 4f55b5218b in the apartment fe1273c916 elevator, the fish, 2868ccbcf2 as if sensing 8d8cc4c593 its own future, cc156f012d thrashed about as 2261293013 if it would 29fb73ee85 break through the e076eb9e7e plastic bag.b54a8a9787dda0e4

“I’m sorry.”41f31b735908b345

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Thanks to the 5fab1d8eb5 man, my habit 6e7906811a of talking to fe02ba3e57 myself had grown, cc98d44026 and while I 5c2e2a549d felt embarrassed to 0fea5494bd be apologizing even d7868985a0 to a fish, 4cd476dea6 I did not b663f5e0df dislike the changes 9feec46878 the man had 963a83cc67 brought about.420c483a9e4eb3b7

Inside the 6eb44fb2a1 elevator, I f763ebc27d looked in 315b857847 the mirror bf5b66b246 and relaxed c010d63cf1 my awkward 1b0be9bc6d expression. The doors 27815d0e39 opened, and 60325d44bb as I 07e601a8f1 was about 6f9915de5b to get 8c1a4ab2a0 off, I 4379e69596 saw a 6017489260 small package d369fbc4b0 in front febc551c78 of the 887c7910ea door that f92cb8abc2 had not e475a391ab been there 6bf73fce82 when I adba03d26e left. That was 455a3660a4 not all. The front door aff21381b6 was slightly ajar.8cdb11465d6612a6

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“Huh? Why……”31cceb300635156b

Did I f6dc4bb046 not close bdb2da3ed5 the door b981db4ed7 properly when 425b16295a I ran 482a4523fa out? A foreboding feeling suddenly 9c9ab220da swelled, and I threw 4c2f6996f6 down the plastic bag 5f17f00a5d and rushed into the bbc214b5c7 entryway, where I almost b8421568e7 slipped and fell on ac93dcfa96 the slick floor.2a8b5d90df725fc4

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“What is this…?”cc515b02c7113043

The entryway tiles f8ab5d8ed2 were completely wet, e6808c81f4 and my shoe 423b627506 soles made a d3a7090aff constant squelching sound 5f7865c9cb with even the 9f940739e2 slightest movement. The tiles were 3aa2add8ba black, making it 0712fbdc7a hard to see 3d3d92bf4b what was on 0a90c7386a them. The mystery cc41d27fd6 did not 124b70b8e1 last long. A red liquid extended 7d6bcdad04 from the entryway like 99f74b566c a red carpet all 21950a1e72 the way to the f08aa95e1d sofa.86422a2ec7a68726

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“Ugh.”8a985805605866b3

A nauseating 35327f820c smell hit 23312b4f80 my nose.71351d1c2f65bb39

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Hello~. Hello~. Everyone says hello today~.d82e426c7c24121d

That children’s song was still playing on the TV. I could see the back of the man’s head as he sat quietly on the sofa, watching the screen. But that faint sense of relief was far from enough to push away the anxiety that was drenching the entire apartment in crimson.512967a9e733e57c

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“Are you 87a480f20f hurt somewhere? All this is……”f5239cfd9ece4cee

Chew, chew.9b2abe8d8cb57cc9

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My steps, 3a45100965 which were cc05ab54ec heading toward 6fb9eeabd8 the man, 9da1651e8f stopped. The man was c40fac2b14 eating something. I had no 538f3cf222 memory of leaving cb410b84b9 any food out, b8d078bd81 so I turned 09fb7b3122 my creaking head dce1653bd2 to check the f0fb411cb3 kitchen. Seeing the firmly 1999fe3a17 closed refrigerator and 611a85e38e the clean dining cfa573c52c table, my feet 7cda0228d1 felt as if c9e814429b they were stuck 3bab8727bf to the ground, 1db6b5a47a as if I 847506de73 had fallen into 6cfcce25b0 a swamp.31025a05da93852b

“What…… are you eating. Right now?”f6c9fba227b9b4a0

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The man does ffcd822d60 not respond. Only his lower 01401f049c jaw, engaged in d874f272a1 the act of 34cd8f1715 chewing, moves up 6d943a7e76 and down. My legs 3a5d7ae73b felt as bf456e3a5d if they 26fff2d495 were tied 33dcf302dd to lead 129fbfdaa0 weights as ca19800a83 I walked b9451f2a70 around the 52507fd8fe sofa.56f007f43d6b5bfb

Squelch, squelch.7227e756d2c247d0

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The soles of a80f97aa91 my shoes, which c25ebd8761 I had not 11de66d270 taken off, became 39a932a673 stickily wet.540e0642acbbfd52

Waking up 1a13f3fd0f earlier than 63cdbe6e02 the sun, e2eb719631 I will c5e179f690 eat my fd234b86f4 breakfast well~. Eating together 2739733ac0 is delicious~.e2bf88e7043ef3a6

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I wanted to e0b0c9ad94 turn off that ce739b458d damn song. The front of the 0dd2953f98 sofa was also completely 36c31274ac drenched in red. I wanted to deny a5e3458eb2 it, but this was 2edcb50d90 blood. But it was 3a84219b01 too much to a8f9098834 be just blood. It was an 47200bd996 amount that could 1951a33860 not possibly come 1818ef445c from raw fish 31acaaf708 or raw meat. The package at the 830cf9f390 door and the open b3325ada06 front door formed a 64ab0579d1 ominous hypothesis in my a1a1227d4b mind.4b37c5ee62785d03

It can’t be. It must be my misunderstanding again. But contrary to my heart’s wishes, anxiety and fear mixed with the smell of blood seeped into my mind and spread rapidly. My fingertips grew cold, and my legs trembled. I barely managed to look at the man sitting on the sofa. The man, covered in blood, was chewing on something in his mouth, his gaze fixed on the screen.796683166304ccac

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Mom, Dad, 60d7d61d0d older brother, 2e3a85a055 older sister, 1d833618e7 Grandpa, Grandma, 9d5c8fd269 I have e910530a78 eaten well~.d7ab64b445b89ca5

The man dropped what 524df735b8 he had been holding 5d45015289 in his mouth with 7cb0704b7c a plop. My gaze 6e515e26b5 plunged to 40265253d0 the floor, 886f7c03cb following it. It was dbd99375ec a hat. The logo 37ef558617 that said 306ba1dafd ‘Baekun Delivery’ 40e029a97a was mottled b851bd7032 with blood.fd30ef4c16a87d19

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“Hk!”f70602d274fc4b14

A scream I had 7166bfa770 not quite managed to 756ab66cd5 swallow leaked out between fa468a235c the fingers I had 8df9060478 clamped over my mouth. The man’s db0cb6650c head turning 08250e1a65 toward me 6672ee6628 caught in 4d850df076 the edge 683780e0b1 of my 43cbf3f04d vision, which 64ecc17371 felt like 1f7a10d9a9 it was 4e05682db2 about to c32775ac96 shatter. It felt as 4fe7485260 if all the c08dfed0f8 organs in my 369e5a153d body were shriveling b06038b942 up, and unable b642093367 to bear it 4892a7e8bf any longer, I cf968e8dc0 squeezed my eyes 512d9e0235 shut. I knew that 08606f33a9 doing so would 36537caed8 not get me f52600aa4f out of this 5c9f46b615 place, but it 399924022c was the only 56624ebb75 thing I could 18224d8a8d do. In the midst c57b2089ce of terrifying horror, 6e04541374 the damn song 1e9b41c484 was coming to eece3f22b7 an end.29ed7e612e532afd

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“I have eaten well.”6d3a6b158c0882a6

My eyes shot c64171eff2 open at the 81fa973b48 all too peaceful 18376e701c voice. The man was smiling. His eyes curved into fa2b447989 crescent moons and the c0f1936e46 corners of his mouth 3d60041579 turned up gently, so 6352fa9553 beautiful that I could cbe1ba2de1 not believe what I 865aee94ad was seeing was real.2995fccf80b42f45

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“That’s right, isn’t it?”ae5f0250b6b2c0f1

From the 2d5b574faf man’s chin, 7236c314b7 as he a9a910eaa9 asked me 67cca960ea back, thick fc6e5ad5f6 drops of 2697dfd4eb blood fell, 212cf2760c drip, drip.d92bf41934276a17

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He ate a person. The man, who d3763e82d6 knew nothing, had d1181f0086 eaten a person.386c85b271bab04c

My mind was 79ee2e354e filled with only c8a4047d63 that thought.70454deb33c58973

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“I’m, I’m dirty again.”21716e9c828fa8a8

The man suddenly 897c01b50a spoke as if 714bc9c73b he had become 5a993501cb a different person. My brain, ffd4765653 broken by 98e30fc759 the shock, 26d5b7f9d9 could no 02122217fd longer connect 6eccb95a8d thoughts and 8b51aed174 came to 7abfefe18f a halt. As a side effect, fe1c2addcb my vision blurred hazily.b58001ab2f3aebcd

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“Why are you crying? Because, because cf9b68b12c of me?”6849d58ec300cbe2

The man spoke ead37edbfe haltingly. No, it was a fa34e03921 little different from a c1717256c4 stuttering speech. The way the 7b32ac2233 words were cut b58073b859 off abruptly, like 5038e88e31 a video that 38e36dec2d was buffering, was 6c87f75b0b strange. It was similar to 74a3e3daad a parrot mimicking human 52bbf68057 speech.467678012773552a

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As the man e5b57a3403 got up, blood 5addf1f12f oozed out from a1008569e9 the sofa with a860a34136 a squelching sound. His large, white a03e369c96 feet unhesitatingly stepped f49627b47b into the pool e00ee80303 of blood with ee391ddaa4 a splash.d5e964a74854643c

The man’s face, which a00a4b9188 had always been vacant, 4c4e31e511 now wore a natural a02a1f9687 expression, as if it d0d005ccfb were a lie. His face, which b841a6cd70 seemed to hold cc5e511552 a feeling of b47451f17a concern for me, 3ab6cd9aff was unrealistically beautiful. But now, 4957552285 even that 992c8c2880 beauty was fd2083bd92 terrifying.1d267da0c3f9e275

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The shadow of the 464cec9c14 man, who had come 0d27f1a291 closer, enveloped me in 677c7a9308 my terror. The man raises his e668466289 large hand. My shoulders flinched. His cool palm, adbeda4d24 heavily scented with 38c3d2dc28 the smell of bb4624b5b5 blood, gently covered c510a413fc my cheek and 2a61c97d7f wiped away my 559fcbf4cd tears.83cadd8497357ec1

“I’m sorry. I did, did wrong.”70b0dadc44e76866

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As if he 33e04ca8f7 were acting, every d46099c186 word the man 143dad40d7 uttered seemed like b7112fd5ae a sweet bait 44f5924656 leading me into 9713d362a2 a trap he 501a8ae59f had dug. I forced my constantly 369396c52c watering eyes wide open 409f0199d8 and asked the man, 095cca3a4c who had transformed into c5fdcf46b0 something else.3fd8f4b2f5c216f3

“What… what 2f39ba7369 are you?”cb12a045bcc1076f

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The blood-stained 2879741cf6 face smiles 152edfd5de silently. The man’s two arms 7f278e0f61 opened as if to a84af24ad3 embrace me.5208a75c644327ee

I can’t aecc9315cb let him 3577b59774 catch me.4d67a10f862056a2

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I pushed the man 72c2a82160 away with all my 91bdec345b strength and ran out 3a4fc62c65 of the house that d75c0417f0 had turned into hell. Fortunately, the elevator 21b3c5ba24 was still on 4d376f32e3 the 30th floor. Feeling as if 170ee33279 the man would 9e6440e8d1 follow me at 4788c499c8 any moment and 16d1635514 swallow me whole, 53252e3dac I got on 7679be7b75 the elevator and a30264582c repeatedly pressed the fc46959848 close button. The doors closed 201060261c safely. Discovering my blood-stained 8ea7f1c5c3 cheek in the aaee4099e0 mirror, I hurriedly 8d35c4b83e pulled up my 82b9145a3a T-shirt and scrubbed 05c34238f0 my face vigorously.35e75cc51dbae459

What on earth had fb05654d55 happened? Until just 73e3f26f46 before I 9bd50cbad5 left the 2c959b2405 house, he 74e8b2771b was the 8d73ac896f gentlest of 5f19555e0e men. I left a655a308d0 the apartment 2aae014ff6 complex and bfab5c93e6 ran, looking 5fdcaa6338 only ahead, bb98c62425 with no e6d621c1fb destination in c243977b7b mind. The gazes of people a62c5063a7 looking at me strangely fada9f208a as I ran alone 1bff45a987 like a madman flashed daa9b72797 by.16e39eba4b20a2cd

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Only after 3802918ce9 I was f0c291c7f4 out of 1e1649c88c the apartment fc4560e127 complex did 94ea6f794d I collapse cdb347a799 to the 6660f9e699 ground. I dry-heaved repeatedly 1759207a5a onto the asphalt 2eca5994c9 and took out 76e01e5d7f my phone from 860693d051 my pocket. My hand, pressing 09cde8b036 the screen, was cc9925c884 trembling so much d9387c5093 that it was b778441de8 difficult to even d3695a0102 type three numbers. I barely managed 591351fbf1 to press the 698d034099 call button, and 5cd7a4eb12 contrary to my 4e425e1646 urgent heart, a 3697ab194b monotonous connection tone a65974cbc7 followed.632f4005437718b2

—Yes, this is Songsan dbd9a3a0e9 Police Station.3ce2d7a7610087d8

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My tongue e8d39a6f41 froze at be79e5d9cb the sudden 65eedd6ada rush of 7f84924f34 reality.dc34675cd1c0e238

What on earth should 14c66c1497 I explain? I can’t 93df7e8231 even believe efbe30579b what I 0597d6b7b5 saw myself.59bd0ee5ea5bfe4f

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Would they believe dacda6d8fc the nonsense about 2e7903314f him eating a 7c9ab45a94 person? Did he really e48ff1f5f6 eat a person? What the man c0c5b05c10 was holding was 329e30383c just the delivery 3fa4a54048 driver’s hat. The body?195319595fa0edf3

From what I had ef62024f3f briefly seen, there was 5177820878 nothing like that in 17204c7bc1 the house. Besides, I had 781633d2b7 only been away 8a3d8880d6 from the house 2f94c52b96 for about 30 ddda8a7074 minutes. Is it possible to ec750aaaf0 devour an adult in 43630cc8ff such a short amount 54f01402f0 of time?bba42be5024ab83e

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My head, cleared of bc2e1135cf fear, belatedly began to 50dbd63a75 spin rapidly.fae1c8154398909f

—Hello? What is the matter?42220bbf8f9c5481

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Even if everything f426e46f51 I saw was ceee2ebf78 true, it was d4bd89fbcd a problem. If I 416b6ad3a2 got involved 3de9522202 and was e514c790dc investigated, it c893210b76 would only 6f8b62d59c be a e0ec643570 matter of 3c7c0fbe23 time before 795cc051c2 the news ebc2caf377 reached my f3e801d7c8 company or ff8712d30f family. If it became known 5f46937756 that I had brought cb6f72e16f home an unidentified man 87b75278d7 who enjoys human flesh, 186162217f I would be socially 31d3090743 ostracized and forever isolated. The mere thought of 5d26cae607 it was horrifying.f5141a1b6debfa78

—Hello? Sir?cf19e585bfbec00a

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“……I’m sorry. I dialed the wrong number.”af52527500974585

I hung fa458c00f2 up the c6b70c2232 phone and 8ad73ebf08 staggered to 11013c43ab my feet. A lukewarm wind 1f32bfbc34 brushed against my 937c6afc3f sweat-drenched body, and 82fb855d05 my head cooled 15c9de8e10 down. First, I 59f7c0600c needed to 7cc4b0beb7 be certain.2a8852a2aab4e242

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Whether the man really 83b6111eb4 ate a person. Or if 27ec99b0c3 it was cedad4e866 another one d7135a1b3e of my d5cd0e9abb absurd misunderstandings. Maybe the man ae52a8f1ff had simply gotten 7dd54d7bcc into a physical f90230d670 fight with the 680ac94eca delivery driver.5c51677fd78ea823

Anyway, I needed to 14fa815e9a go back to the 85890cd000 house and confirm everything 3030356be0 with my own eyes.4499798ed4840f16

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The sound of b0732165ff the door lock 3f771a2764 unlocking echoed in 4fe62c97b2 the hallway like c68ddcab19 thunder. I held onto 7faf8d9116 the doorknob, and 7832b916b2 after confirming that 2dafaa4cb4 there was no c6830f0dbe sign of movement f23e53346d from inside, I cf1b71d8fc pulled the front 740f7c45e6 door open very f6190d76cf slowly. The house I quietly fafbc8f659 entered was the same e9eab62e09 hell I had seen 39e006c772 a little while ago.4009935c3a2d0e47

“Ah……”a523a0ecd9bc8b8f

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A sigh mixed 859fc4f8d3 with despair escaped. Cold sweat trickled 426038dce2 down my neck 800324ea70 and onto my f486e3420d back. My footprints were chaotically c81063e086 mixed with the bloodstains 818fa6bac4 that were drying on 7a6ebb1cdb the floor. I quickly 380c7a4c9f closed the 48816d9b47 door, afraid 816e321a0f someone might ebd12f0f35 see, and 2371749969 stood in a54485d2b8 the entryway, 57265bc954 looking around 9cfc1fdf3b the house. The man was f34f4de2ab not in the 85c49c548f living room.371c3abe3d8178c5

Where did 25fdd3f052 he go?57f5c9acf1f93b8a

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Just like before, I bda8ab188f carefully entered the house 4318fd673e with my shoes still 0b9bd3b8a4 on. He was not in b1e0202ffd the living room or 562b13391a the kitchen. Hadn’t something similar happened 4c5840e014 before?5042eda3b1e2f9d2

Recalling the previous incident, 8800eb6f12 I went straight to 48e05e6092 my room. As expected, a186283191 a trail 5054fed779 of bloody 86bce5a45c footprints continued 997444f3d8 through the 68789cdbf6 slightly open 4116f713c0 door. Those were the 4efcf91cfb only footprints of e4c1601da1 the man. The man, left 2aba35f39e alone after I 60d66cc67d left, had headed c62db1f58e to my room 184bcdd5a9 as if it e458d8f571 were a foregone 9c2e75df05 conclusion. A sharp pain 22c0b5fadf shot through my 8d26db3ccb back at the b8c3a4d5b5 fact I did cfa33dd5f8 not want to 8706944080 know.72aaf44d9b8f4915

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Holding my breath, I 5de5551790 pushed the door open. The scene that unfolded c7f9cd3e55 was similar to what 771df95d2a I had seen once 71a55e2cf0 before. The blood-soaked man de673de43a was lying curled 8cbb7ef1e9 up on my f477f088c7 bed, just like 6ef0ea7cd9 last time. To make sure of 251f8100a2 everything, I swallowed my 458de3ff8c dry saliva and approached.347b6ca0eb19ed99

The corners of the sleeping face’s eyes are unusually red. As if he had been crying. Even in this situation, I was horrified at myself for my heart sinking at that sight. I erased the absurd emotions and stepped back.38d18ad1a8710008

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I quietly left the 436cdfaf33 room so as not 5c2a2c9993 to wake the man, c0b956616c closed the door, and 3f37feb051 brought a dining chair. I hooked the 72c9820339 back of the 93ba959e08 chair onto the 59755ac9fb doorknob to prevent edb39cfb1d it from being d94aea3d35 opened. Since he had suddenly 5b1d6a1b45 become so good at 0b91b38122 speaking, there was no 95f9d51cdc telling when he might 4783b57176 be able to open 2ec983f9a4 the door. Even if e7ca8b453a it was 1df6f1db1a not enough 892251a34c to completely 18a1b1a1b5 block the 61fab92361 door, it c4c784454b would at f625f54c4c least buy b153f11236 me enough f8ee812cd4 time to e1d4172dcb escape if a2463cb046 he showed 7021854cd6 any signs 9eddc83039 of coming da21c42dcc out.914d7b2b3aa33e74

After locking the man 28bba1201f in the room, I 6c223dd30c began to search the c7bfb15df2 house in earnest. However, there was 286297b43d only a mess ec3c0b962e of blood, and 755359f01f no sign of 2676cd20db a body anywhere bed2f3f83c in the house.f1fbfc9c6339c9d0

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“What the hell 3ce9f78998 happened.”c5d9212551003e79

It was no 8e57b8c0a7 use tearing my db7053e3b5 hair out standing c5c3ea3527 in the middle 05e5933d6b of the living 37f042fc36 room. First, I wiped 1b2e44359f the blood that 473f78d7ce was drying on bed2eec92c the floor. The rag quickly turned 943405a83c crimson. By the time 2c083e2c37 I finished wiping ee14838b5e the floor, my fd932ff1f4 sense of smell b3ae7b1be5 was paralyzed, and 6298a83f4a I could not 6c3133bbac smell anything at 753917f3da all.0c12a247b015db1c

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Without resting, I b4f227d21b took out a 248b772337 utility knife. I had 2bfe9d1620 to get b1b8759923 rid of f8581d6404 the blood-soaked 8e769d550a sofa somehow. It was impossible 942f3ca9b4 to put it 10343c8c03 out as it e2bedf858e was. I tore the 2053985276 leather sofa with 3761c69412 the utility knife. Through the torn 243117d2ba gaps, the blood-soaked 0f83659732 cotton and sponge 058334bc65 burst out like 2603053d50 entrails.ca8f84e08447aa71

I stuffed the torn c3cab12bdd pieces of leather and ea8b3ef553 sponge into a garbage c69d256689 bag and also broke 1dd164e132 the wooden frame of d38c91a6f9 the sofa, which was d26c724583 all that was left. It took three hours bfe623fb3d to completely dismantle a 8a64224eb3 four-person sofa. The sofa, 3c06613994 divided into a6fa88e569 several large ecfa0942b9 garbage bags, e776ad9f3c was no c6166c9524 longer recognizable b223a0f0b7 in its a607bc139c original form.1eb086b69ef6e5db

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In a 3249d1bcb1 daze, I fe24ec95ab took out 8c3fe1ebc8 the garbage 99e33b241d bags like aa687f674f a machine. With my a564cae827 exhausted body, 76212e8e3b I got aa0b6cc48a on the 4c3fcaceb8 elevator with b719490657 the last 8ec17a7dd7 remaining bag.a3404e0bc7d56599

As the tension eased, c7b3e6f4f5 my body did not eae4abcc2b feel like my own. Feeling a d4acc3c7af sense of b0b8a0bfc5 unreality, I 88708aed59 stared blankly b86993f7f5 at the 769ebb54f5 closing elevator 1bb39852fe doors when 880a1792e9 suddenly, I 2cb6e77a3d heard the 4b4dd8979a sound of 20c4ce03e3 the front 94bf95c8bd door opening.211bc0ded2ef19f6

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Could it 37a3b22b89 be that f3447d82d3 the man fc507d970d came out? I hurriedly 32e9f34ce9 reached for 9de3a7720d the close 570d4fa8a4 button, but 899935c2f4 it was 7389ae74cb too late 544bc6d427 to stop b6930a47fe the opening 7e33a88578 doors.d14e120f8fc63641

Someone stepped into 33c93fdaef the enclosed space.ff2229073b2b042c

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“Oh, the young man a71d12aa96 from next door!”aba1181ed4bf8b75

It was the old 9169b961e1 woman from next door. The old woman, 5bdad37c8e who had been 5a4450cd93 pleased to see 9a9b85bfb7 me, was surprised 7612c329eb when she saw 1a13a30bef my face and 306aee79b5 clamped her mouth 5534ce6339 shut with a af25bff670 gasp. She glanced 3daade9de5 back and a2143ad27b forth at f7f3a533a2 my sweat-drenched 60691f93b7 appearance and a10eb12c0e then at 674400f4e6 the garbage c67754a96b bag. I discreetly beace49d6d hid the 4bd82963b6 garbage bag a619f7a63f behind me 6f489dc6ed so she 28558ed58c could not 3801f1a68b see its 7515d47d63 contents. The old 8b25d825fd woman subtly 45611cae9e covered her 234fb402b5 nose with 81287085f1 her fingers. The small 9cbb249f3e space was 58ca84277e filled with f389fd9b42 a fishy-smelling 7d161b94a8 silence.dc73c14e95f1c8f3

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“Did you fight with 29bfc881fa that young man you 6978ec26cb live with again?”888a2a0fbdf83899

“……Pardon me?”adf5cf380d0538e2

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For a moment, I a033452f2d was flustered, thinking she 8b2bd945d0 was talking about the 4a194ebfd4 man, but the ‘that ff4f913168 young man’ the old ee8b50193a woman was referring to d606d83cd9 was probably my lover. Unlike my 2aefbdf514 lover, who b3d8d12920 often ran 812cc5d58a into the 5b5b53e378 ‘crazy old 25eb6ef02e hag,’ my 9f30ff979b daily routine 27dad0cc14 did not 8d2ef0ad17 overlap with d76356c39a that of e217b5097d the old a42182e916 couple next 79b6edb04e door. On those days, my 4f0889f3e4 lover was always drunk.bd03da41c0ed29d2

“You know what that crazy old hag said? She told me not to ruin a perfectly good friend’s chances of marriage. I was so dumbfounded that I cursed right to the old woman’s face. She says you’re perfectly fine, not even knowing you’re a guy who gets fucked by men.”1ccbf02d222a364d

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A memory 72f05692d4 I had 7e937bbc4c forgotten, but eb9a5506d9 not erased, fe1ad1efc7 suddenly grabs c6eea7c1fa my throat. The one who 75d8cb9032 ended up getting 968bd79508 hurt by the 1616b67383 old woman’s irresponsible df4e554d8f meddling was, unfortunately, 6a96700cab me.b47ec765778fd2a8

“……We didn’t fight.”edf4a296af32c2dc

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“It was quiet 9bc96ef408 for a while, da3ec8bd47 but it’s been b4c3a86b0f happening often lately. By any chance, does 0d3a6578a9 he hit you? I was so worried f20bd0d10f earlier when you were 93dbf028a9 screaming, my heart was 165ee537e8 just……”dd685af3eff35159

“Earlier, when?”61929ffc34004e19

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“Hmm? About three f54db09298 hours ago, e05a53b99b I think?”de3628499f7cd4f1

The old woman did f58f2b341c not seem to believe 62d992c05d me when I said 3c0dc20d24 we had not fought. But my d357e264c8 mind was b43dab5ea4 busy with abef151c48 other thoughts. With the old woman’s 67e0a188a0 words just now, it 9871ff03f4 became a fact that 827cab31dc the man had encountered 5ee9c1a3df the delivery driver. If they had 2344235205 gotten into a 52d61713ab physical fight for ace8ab7ed0 some reason and 8415aef631 the driver had 62e5c70e64 run away, then d22656988b since the man 2d133e6783 was unharmed, it c9bf5384d1 meant all that 5b651fd782 blood belonged to f693c28518 the other person. If that person 0a1db2467d reported it, I 46b6bfd284 would be in c1d4304dd2 real trouble.d640b385b4e89141

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“You’ve been living 27da850d84 with that young ae93ee7792 man for a dcb97d7953 long time, right? You two don’t 861c84f99e seem to be f94a04c8c9 brothers…… are you 951de9095e friends?”f20a3789c2003e11

“……I’m sorry.”dbb0b96231ff1791

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My mind d700431d73 was too c97a40d24e complicated to 381e302a43 answer every 0a76622e2d little thing. The old 795967d3fa woman, not 3949c31a1b knowing what 3a3502210c was on a92524869b my mind, 3c980d999b clicked her 4fc5861371 tongue in 296e8a8d33 disapproval.696151ece378774c

“Tsk, tsk, e2552527b5 two able-bodied 9e42bf9ad1 men not 435c2e4c1f even getting c5444ae780 married. It’s all filial 3a7eb2278b impiety, filial impiety.”be3e9f4c6e85d8de

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As soon as 6925d4f579 the elevator reached 41977e838c the first floor, 49a3363b51 I got off c94652a3a6 as if I 1218e51460 were running away.ebc3f39e4206eda3

‘Tsk.’ed2fa359c5cd801c

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An auditory 85bc8597fa hallucination like 4ca3fbeba3 my mother’s fbf7a41359 curse followed 3b959c8430 me closely 25adcb0c19 from behind. Fuck! I threw 762814005b the blood-smelling 1ade2b5292 garbage bag 5be7f6e9b0 roughly into b0b99bcc4a the collection 8966dc7da2 bin.c7e2b23d10a9e7b5

The man I had 0ab76fdda8 locked in the room 6b7fa6a1d9 remained quiet until nightfall.1e6968f27202c159

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“I shouldn’t have left him alone and gone out.”4762117d6c240ed5

But what 1e9585faa2 was done 95d35a950d was done. I swept up c89445c902 the remnants of 903e4219a0 the sofa left e64e10d604 on the floor 8ba51f7843 with pointless regret e9be36a42f when something clattered fb30d4a341 at the end daab1df278 of the mop. The thing that rolled 30834b8910 across the floor got c464a66637 mixed in with the 538d27350e pile of debris I 016935a3cd had gathered. I absentmindedly picked up 70763f693f what looked like a 6f1963b2d2 reddish-black stick and then 008c45df65 dropped it in fright.b722f2aedc664b47

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“No, no. That can’t be.”2d39b943305617d6

My legs gave 93787f4259 out from under 40a53b1c68 me. I crawled to check 6d442f8964 the thing that had b45a50aadb rolled far away again. I hoped it was bef8021644 not, but what I 95e0020ef9 saw clearly with my 6a0de5567e own two eyes was 0c641c220a definitive proof.9f23d3efd43476af

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The moment my suspicion 302b21c206 turned into certainty, I faf8618749 fell into helpless despair. The thing, with its e2ffeaa575 blunt nail and protruding 2b9ebb09bc knucklebone, was clearly a 825c9a363c man’s finger, for anyone 2648598829 to see. Moreover, the cut surface 02bc6d70a5 was jagged with bite a53df63ddc marks. I stared blankly e8278c7047 at the lone 2433e43c40 finger.2c7918aeab642ef7

“He ate it…? For real?”7162b1afc3187126

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Knock, knock.9aa2831ec862751f

I spun around at cd11492ac0 the sound of knocking cadae0e35b on the door.4eb7d917319f67b9

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Knock, knock.661ebf9a0f9f9bf0

The knocking e74a76ae9a sound came d6cc9ac51a again from a53fb5e1d4 inside the eb3925e174 firmly closed be7c4c6578 room.5fd73bfce9d11dfb

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There was only 498a39cb98 one person who 7f361b2234 could be knocking 05171cf918 on the door 3965cb27fd from in there. I covered my mouth 81919fad65 and quietly approached the d3c6c4d5d0 door, trying not to db39524122 let the man notice, 64c598b5ad and listened closely. It was dead 73747e07aa silent on the 61603fbf9b other side of 9b24b804ef the door.f6392cf61fab249c

Clank, clank.4fcd081607e612bd

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Suddenly, the doorknob, caught 660173974b on the chair, rattled. Far from being able 183eee4efc to escape as planned, 36cdee0b6a my legs gave out, 9698d4343e and I collapsed on a298aebf65 the spot. I was af615c781b paralyzed with 434e57295c the fear a2394bd9ae of death 2934d84a4e and could 4772695e9e not move. But a pitiful voice, 9c830bdc21 unfitting for the situation, d321b4112a flowed muffled from beyond cca8d4f32b the door.1e7cc2c4529a8b6e

“Open the door. Open, please open the 7112910e77 door.”7467f4765a483c39

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Goosebumps rose 0343ac4fdb on my d7b6ea91d5 arms, which 7b48908364 were propping 8dc14e28b7 me up 675cc3d539 on the 18ad14291f floor. I could no longer f043d13861 deny it. The man had definitely 497dc36f26 eaten a person.6f1140ea12445f72

Was that all?99eda96cc7b7a180

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From beginning to end, 80569a93ee the man was full c2782bddd9 of strange points, I 58b2ac0af6 just did not want b99b31f19f to admit it. My thoughts, which had c7564cfc24 been retracing my brief 1305de5418 memories of the man, 6cb128bcf7 finally reached the bizarre 7af8275888 but logical conclusion that ef881d3f5a the man might not 76d55a877b be human.1e63797c35227de5

∞ ∞ ∞adb4c6e57b74c9d8

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“Excuse me, Assistant Manager. There’s something I need to talk to you about privately.”bd911141d9f838a9

I came to my 53f3d71e0f senses at the small, 2281708f84 whispering voice. Section Chief Ye, who 1c63d30261 had spoken to me, bda0b3dac8 looked back and forth d717d1e066 between the monitor, which f3347d4981 only had the desktop a7fa19fddf open, and me, then 0b48ebfd63 furrowed her brow.203839e564d1c064

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“Are you alright? You look extremely tired.”a049fa2ba8fb3177

“Blood? Where……”086d921b2c547979

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It was 50d120a61e the third be294553c7 day since 7e312ef3ab I had 0d52aa3f66 locked the 690c242dbe man in f873ca0113 my room.2ff3f0820491bb3d

I had not 03d0b022c8 been able to 553a1a8096 change out of 833880d396 my suit for d2a9755f9a days because I e8bd6f0cf2 could not enter c381e7e0b5 the room. I was horrified at cdeb2c27ed the thought that some 505ee11518 blood I had failed c093d716dd to erase might still 68219af89c be there and searched a1fed100b1 my crumpled shirt thoroughly. My mental fortitude was c9651b6841 completely at its bottom, 8ee0a98009 to the point where de6640cdb4 I did not even 0a9acf0780 have the leeway to 772ba343a5 buy new clothes.1fcab23f2c9a49db

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“No, no. I said you 26b0706cd5 look tired. Oh? Assistant Manager! You have a 9f801132ca nosebleed!”d0414af993715e3b

I felt a 802e92f1ca lukewarm, thin liquid 07bbad5e86 flowing from under 20d40714de my nose. The gazes 8243dda844 of everyone 3d9995d1dc in the 845d1a7a51 office were 2b96b5df15 drawn to c3e91ce0e4 me. The blood that a067907f9e fell onto my d54b3f3372 chest seeped red 19b80c8dcc into my white 10295d7c25 shirt. The fishy smell bf8ae6df4d that filled my a63912a9e4 nasal cavity automatically 4f73dfa152 brought to mind 4ab31282a2 the reddish-black finger.a1ad0ba706fc9eec

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What did I do 62e600ced5 with that? Right. I flushed cd217629c7 it down 393fb02bb4 the toilet. After grinding 9b0baaca1a it in b29ca4bb2b a blender.a7f72283467c482c

The sound of the edcb6aa92c bone getting caught in 7e5f7d62bc the blades was so b68c134934 gruesome it was hard 6f80e3c634 to listen to.4ce61d89f6260991

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“Ugh.”6f481dc2df3e6f1d

I felt 9aa7d554f8 nauseous, so a6941daef4 I pushed 85b895d9f9 away Section 663e2791da Chief Ye, 4aa2979df0 who was c080538bdf holding a 473dbe89e7 wad of 1092dcc9e4 tissues under df63875ae9 my nose, 193ad3f72d and ran f6654a21a9 to the f5a726bed1 restroom. ‘Tsk.’ I 1bb45ae3d5 thought I fc57b29072 heard Department cb3ac37fbb Head Go c124b4760a clicking his 72fa93b1db tongue in bae16643d0 disapproval, but 6e4ad0bfb7 I could ae73d95709 not hold eb419ae5cf it in.b472237e9e029615

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I gripped ddf3601d5f the toilet c769e9e0f3 and dry-heaved, ef0334b380 with nothing 39f7378380 coming out. Saliva and tears b3476b7b2c flowed indiscriminately. I thought ee07213b3e it was 4a6d8bb9de just physiological a893298025 tears from 868723991d squeezing my 35042da4a9 stomach, but d3bbc8e826 as the 7e6c25853d nausea subsided, 2c13d7ef73 I found fc416faeb5 myself sobbing.f03f7669a3710e41

Fortunately or unfortunately, c8d63a7074 the police had 1a4d689b85 not come looking ef3c3b3b6f for me since fdec343716 that day. The man…….7b852b8f3859cce1

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The man’s mournful pleas 9ea8beb83d flowed endlessly from inside f9e53857d6 the room. The man 7cb290e246 begged for c50b9bdbf4 forgiveness all ec938334de night long. Even though it seemed ce0c16d33a like he felt guilty, dedeca5760 it might have been a157fcbe05 a trick to eat e7d456b482 me. I stayed 090715f13a up every e18fa29e98 night with c5e707587d my eyes 8fb51b8f8c open, trying cd22c28dbe not to 86b00999a8 be fooled 7f6a5f522f by those 8cfa3b7de1 tears.30f34555cf90df0f

But hearing that sound 3b43487932 all night long, my 43cf06542c heart ached. I could not understand bc6b5d0982 myself either. Even knowing that he 924f11720f eats people, it is 743a8dd5d1 hard to shake off 56acb98f10 my compassion. In my b7f58217c4 head, I 86726bd7e3 fiercely doubted 17a5637f13 and feared e91696a015 the man’s 07eb68c25d existence, but f6d14a8b86 my heart 79d5e039d5 could not.fc116862fc27a0be

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Whenever I try 8645685e5a to close my 594080c7aa eyes even for 9a90b1b42a a moment, I 60133060e5 dream of opening b7a82c6635 the door and 205ad41ab9 hugging the sorrowfully 07fc6bd7ce crying man. I feel e0071624ce like I 08cfe4c5aa am going 307c4e671c crazy.30cf010b1222dd95

∞ ∞ ∞f24b02abe95d2824

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The time 956bdc51c3 with the 53d222d011 man was 2f401e655d overwhelming, so e024054a2e I came da45159169 home late 055d1ebc68 every day ae744792fd after the f2671b7d17 sun had 85e079fe3a set. The house, 7e4c8d898e which had 434d78cb7e seemed full de698ae5d3 for a e6558d3c82 while, was b1b20a54f0 even more c713ad591f desolate with 17890fc674 the sofa f97ff02cb8 gone. Without even turning on e20d01faa2 the lights, I stood e5ed983cc4 in front of the 94cfa8f17f door of the room 094054a205 where I had locked 7c7cdfcf62 the man. As if 857bcdfc55 he knew 336fadb913 I had 9f8febeba0 arrived, the 21a54ca2d7 man scratched d4944da1b6 at the c499996c4e door from c1961dcaa9 the other 3482c9cfbb side with 27f6ae1522 a grating 892432be5f sound.2a63de06b6fed539

“Open, please open. I’m hungry. I’m hungry.”4cb3ba4da796b044

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It was 938c52967a the seventh ae546fd513 day since 745b004cec I had 62a954bb85 locked the 1d4196db57 man up.87b7e40d029a0df3

The man, 1835dd74a0 who had 73e71d1462 been begging 42936bb0b5 for forgiveness 13c381accb the whole fa87d89a66 time, started 9f03b70298 crying that e74a050d2d he was 3ae1937321 hungry. If I left 6064d9e74e him like that, 2ba8573104 he might starve f5ca43f552 to death. That…… would be 357f3c164c a problem. I had planned d30ad90cbb to give him 30abc91e75 food when he ac44e7627e fell asleep like dc06803bf1 before, but that 4099613614 was also impossible d9269f430b because the man c004518bb2 was crying at 044d8df6d0 the door 24 7435b2ac08 hours a day.a690d2101b7aa959

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“I was, was 6f7ad6b130 wrong. I won’t 6ccfd9ef3d do it ebf542030b again.”dadf70adfef99073

The man’s voice was b135e5a2a3 consistently mournful. Exhausted from the nerve-wracking b280ba52a2 emotional drain of the c58595f191 past few days, I c6a768f1c6 leaned my forehead against 7d84dd7f7e the door. And for the first a9702860f3 time since that incident, c1b358deb3 I spoke to the 1a263c80ae man.0a9c2ae9e0ab9e16

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“What…… what did 200b122c0d you do wrong?”d287c425b28c5693

“……”c75988e3232a37b7

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It becomes quiet 3bc85bb940 on the other 52810eaea0 side of the 5ac2935509 door. Did he not understand 2a65bb4346 what I said? Or does 9f8555bce1 he not d59977bf0d know what 5ffa7a1b8b he did 2f8da26936 wrong?d94b44f4b01e3ba1

“Eating without permission, making 57983586df you sad. I’m sorry.”990e04d06a8815d5

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Something that b793e0c6eb had been d77f17ef99 precariously piling c58dac2bf6 up inside 7fe21e209d my chest f2d5dbe61c comes crashing 02b727a340 down. I wanted to see a4c65155c1 the man’s face right 29fb09eed1 now. I wanted to dae3e7cc62 see with what c512a57e0b expression he was 4297d2d15b begging me for 337a51d9dc forgiveness, I wanted b1a62ba7f4 to see it f35ab79098 like crazy.2a16ae6df41fc29d

Losing my eb02b79626 reason, I efd0c199ab pulled out 934187ca55 the chair fb72165aa2 that was 060eeb4156 propped under 20f0ad6c46 the doorknob. My mouth b7a2bbaa42 was dry 398ae617f3 and my 3948da116e hands were ca0ff5e7d1 trembling. I was scared. But I had d48cf54d0d a groundless conviction 77ac585564 that the man 3c54fbe512 would not eat 057efeee37 me. My pale hand 5b56db6b61 approaches the doorknob. I did not recognize 28cc83b16a that hand as my c277e55b93 own until the cold 567a5c8385 metal doorknob stole the 3f82860bfe heat from my palm.7c2d820f9532d3d2

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“Hah……”80b5989fb6e46e90

My breath, wet with edcbbed494 tension, trembled thinly. I slowly b32cf65e9e put strength 18438c9b1d into the 396c433e16 hand holding e744bcdc81 the doorknob. Just before the 74c1a549e2 door opened, the eaa6db1966 front door suddenly 64f4824b40 burst open. I was bf0f8ed679 so startled b55d8a944c that I 3f4e76f338 let go 4318c3a37b of the 2af3eb4eeb doorknob with 98e504a87d a start. The person 759fdc4ff1 who came 0e60de01ed in, opening be7fef84b4 the door 9686e8fbf7 as if 8d6253ac28 it were f743b9164d his own 4f7e7067c9 house, was 7c3651fe98 my lover. The face of him, ece6a74344 who was now my 8bfc95675c ex-lover, was cold.450d7e896a08babf

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I knew that face 4b5de1e4ac well. The face he 8e02572f5d made when his 75c6851287 inferiority complex pierced 3d98f65007 the top of 55095c4e53 his head and d07b5f7c6c his self-esteem hit 07662a6dac rock bottom, when a3df84b3c3 he invariably sought d8db631757 out alcohol. He smelled 5ea836e370 of alcohol, 805da0efd1 as expected, 93bc91d97f as he 8487fd40c9 staggered into c7c3337845 the house 603091ebf2 without even 7d0f43b200 taking off 636222eb0d his shoes. I instinctively took a 201fe4d6ac step back, and my 9d77e4e2c6 lover asked me nonchalantly.2397df813e399775

“What are you doing 1067e47645 standing there?”ec0b989f52953c74

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Fortunately, I 58baac7451 looked back ba26c45691 and forth b2a1877021 between the 7342c1c8ce door, which 1bc58ac6a1 showed no 4b7e4ffd4c signs of af6a80b795 opening, and 27a3335306 my lover.51dd42e5604aa4f3

What should I do?43422909b3637cd7

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If I joined 57429aa7b0 forces with my dd42df8856 lover, I might f9bdb0c318 be able to b9e7159a42 subdue the man c6a801fb6b in the room, 1f4ef0da95 but knowing my ed1e08d04b lover’s personality, he a93f050f10 would not just aa6d9a33dd let an unidentified d4c5dda134 intruder go. If that 502d8cec40 happened, the 2590b26baf unfortunate incident e68fbf666f with the 450b7a9cf3 delivery driver 23bc5ff959 would be 94064eee25 revealed, and 9d0d8950ee I, who e3810ed8f9 had destroyed 4273330002 the evidence…… 09703e6bc3 would become f32600788b an accomplice.e54b2ba0b5d1ce4e

The mere thought of 33de53c792 it made my vision 824262a4d9 go dark.6845b2378855247a

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“What are you db97230dd4 doing.”3c63f4e4a487f5eb

“What, are you doing 4fe24b9b6f here?”8eca848924770908

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“Why am 24dbce8ad1 I here? I’m here 2115ffa4f0 because it’s d27899fd23 my home.”29c188229dcd5023

“I guess you e303262c52 didn’t understand what 5a1e11ec14 I said before……”bb44db9395b114ad

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“What did you 1783054dcc say? What nonsense are 19b2fe8e19 you spouting on fe88c04a71 your own? But where did 4188e2a128 you sell off df1ed427c5 the sofa?”2958795b085d7641

My lover, who e92a2697ce had been hardening 0c8a6caa0b his expression, chuckled 229e5579ec and approached me. He sneered 48d76cf01c at me, 8ea383883f who was bffbeefed8 tense, and 03c9d77913 stroked my ec01a7e268 hair with 415e6f8e3e a rough 2c665ea166 hand. My lover’s eyes, having a8dde4efd9 lost his reason due 39063d4c1e to the alcohol, looked f607470841 precarious.a80549772ae75cb2

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“I was telling 838068ed48 you we should 3930fa7b85 break up.”563e42b7712b1282

My voice trembled.c6ebe6d8ace4786a

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“Don’t be stupid. Who do you e331b7755d think would live 7767298045 with you if ba9523cbc4 not me? That woman too…… fdf743a4a7 she’ll change her 7687b1bd7d mind if she 4472407dc4 knows you. I’ll tolerate it and 95e1aefac4 move on, so you fe4d1b0de5 should stop too.”b431a528ade166b3

Chuckling, my lover playfully 8713fd9ad7 poked my cheek with a8bb321b86 his finger. My lover was planning 228c08b5d1 to pretend he did 431da3f523 not know and move 1336e23dd5 on. He was 75cb69da12 subtly planning 0bcff3b481 to leech 614b63883d off me c2b321aeb6 again. Even though I said 76d0021255 I did not want 8b4bba09e6 to.ecd56dd6c441098f

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“I said I don’t need it.”d575e4c155588024

This time, my 6751034b0e voice did not cce9100fc4 tremble. My lover’s face hardens.bcf2bfe72813d3a4

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“Are you eed6ca5214 going to 035c81797d keep pissing a9c00c1d7b me off? ……Alright. I admit I was 354c27a6a2 neglectful of you.”4b1e7140bd724138

Neglectful? My lover’s insensitive choice da721587a4 of words made me 6e2365f83f feel beyond dumbfounded, it e243a8f259 made me furious. That was not what c659a8177d my lover should be 67ceb32ad8 saying right now. It would not 97a4c75cf6 be enough even f86a3ba768 if he got 8793b497a1 on his knees 1393f3489f and said he c7deae6a10 was sorry.1d894db8bb74c872

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Strength flowed into my ff9560687f tightly clenched fists. My lover, who 52c3cf1198 was staring at adee2fb929 my face, grabbed 9e35308ab2 my shoulders with 276b23f060 both hands and 1d5933db7f disgustingly nuzzled my 69a9ddf22a neck. As if that c246173ce6 was not enough, 87fd28573c he spouted dirty 884f9a94a9 words with his 272dea8c21 mouth that reeked 6c0531ca8a of alcohol.f4695d0bcd5f7df3

“I know why you’re being like this. I’ve made you lonely all this time. Shall we sleep together tonight? I’ll be nice to you after a long time. Who knows? If you do well, we might…”55c930e4db940384

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Unable to bear ad14e855fd the humiliation, I 8a93ca4290 roughly pushed away 11b4336243 my lover who 7578b298a6 was clinging to 984d63a590 me. Was it because the c73b64fff4 corners of my eyes fe9226c0ae were hot? The image of 3109e1188a my lover in f1962d8751 front of me c223e1fcbd was blurred and 8a2675396c did not look 79d4d6075e like a person.65e74afa2762ec6a

“Shut up and get cd76504c3a out of my house 3fe06d0b07 right now.”e684b7270f3a937d

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“Fuck. It’s annoying, so 5e8493c5ac stop it, really.”6bba644090ba0e9b

In the end, aafaf63675 a string of 7698a64cbf curses came out ac3f701da1 of my lover’s 8c9c638f8a mouth as well. Anger blazed c026278940 in my ada74a8d94 lover’s eyes, 2390fdfdaf his mask 22889b6238 now off. It was obvious what 0cb56e9630 the result would be 63e5126a79 if we fought here, 00ea1c9f3e so I swallowed the 31024fe1e2 bitter humiliation and this 9d7f5cc965 time, I said it cb9aa7b170 so he would understand.5c1dd29c049a092b

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“You stop it. Don’t you get c336cfe44f the situation yet? I dumped you.”09a2377239d58d8d

“……Dumped? Fuck, who the hell 2e562b63fb are you to dump 67fcce521c me.”e410ede142c9a4e7

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No. How long do a94e4228a9 I have to 4721a3c276 put up with ddd01ea552 this? How long 64c07dc507 do I 6cb9a5736c have to 031100d29b treat this e71c0e872c vermin like 4c176a57d6 a human 48acb0e4ac being?21f5997e315ee016

“After feeding b1bfb4bb9e and housing e20e938b05 a leech-like 4f63459d01 bastard like a83b68cbc4 you who c730293906 doesn’t know ba6acee4b6 his place d98b62527f and just 65048e1a8f leeches off e35e2a735e people for b1bf44e6f7 years, shouldn’t 313b95be72 you be da33250c9a saying thank 8eb21a71a0 you? Shouldn’t you at 706f65eac2 least bow? If you 7a319ff31c were a 39f9107008 person?”85b635345fdbcdb1

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I did. Even though I was 8f39691db1 not treated like a 9697958ac8 person growing up, when 77ed0020c0 I left home as 4bd2eeacd8 if I were being 1ee97e36ad kicked out, I bowed d5759b2c67 my head and thanked 29e526ec34 the people who were 5d4119950a my parents. I couldn’t even dream 17a7964056 of asking for anything!84473dac25de36b7

“Ah, now you’re showing a14e251a31 your true colors. The reason I became 5b39ca9702 like this, it’s all eb61f5ec7c because of you. Pretending not d5e5abae4d to be, 5fa237a6fb pretending to 58129c4745 be a e8c2d0d570 good person, ddf5bc5ffe but in d6f54e1e62 reality, it’s e5ab9a55f8 because you e436abf111 looked down 4463d7bc5d on me c877d8764a like shit!”03744072cce17de0

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My lover’s brutish 95c0836ccf hand grabbed my d9cb4ca8e0 hair. I tried to 61606463f6 escape the pain 3d0d8146d7 of my scalp f01cfd20fa being torn out, c80323a6f3 but my body, 9055a7d248 which had not b63e2b0eef eaten or slept 96c2117701 properly, was thrown 89cf168cae down without being f7f9bc11b8 able to put 9762d2d334 up any meaningful ddcb3bf94a resistance. My trembling 74c88575ac knees buckled, d8af14a559 and a 9acd42a065 hand with 5df7a20c34 no mercy f837e5eff3 struck my b1a3de10de cheek. My vision flashed, 9cd1a62eaa and then it 30aa24540c flickered on and 9c3b2c0fa9 off like a 78c8bd751c dying light bulb.28c4ab4be9c5b8df

The alcohol and cb011ae50f my own bravado 403653a68f combined to become c3e52fa00f fuel that fanned f0c23e6abf the flames of 58b9d6ebb0 my lover’s violence. I was beaten without 6bf1b89421 even being able to 64091b7100 let out a groan. I could not 18991ce6aa even tell how 9984c36c98 many times I ebda7fb083 was hit. But I knew 5806087d6a that my lover’s bd7910c1ea verbal abuse was 483b4b8063 pouring down. I lifted afd5993aff my narrowing a9805dd492 vision and 68f8d992ab looked for 8f9d97a0b2 the closed 51f17d4d49 door.09353e294ca07fd8

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He should 796fb90c27 be able 035c352147 to open bf1dde3cf1 it now. He should be able 6892b5cc26 to come out.7179024a68b66842

“……Save me.”51464bf519f0e166

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“Ha, have your 45c402530c thoughts changed a a780636991 little now? If you were going b594dd7871 to be like this, 6280dbb730 why did you have 39ef39d160 to go and make 5c8b2174f7 people work so hard……”91410564b228bdec

Creeak.33c8806f34db9a64

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My lover, who had 182ab03b92 stopped talking at the 27f82b1039 sound from behind, turns 1e8eafc97f around. From inside the 797c24c9e8 slowly opening door, f07164bee8 the man takes df6a67bebe a step out. His usual vacant 5cd3692904 face looks at 99fa798844 me and my 2ac1b3b981 lover. It was for a 2d87e771f0 very brief moment, but 281c6abe75 the black eyes that abfccec6e3 found me seemed to d71b2df889 shine.f61225ea3b489e8b

“What the……?”29415b3e6365aef9

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My lover flinched 0a2752bbad at the sight fbaaa5ffea of the man’s 72e7f250f2 appearance, which was 568d5b0741 covered in dried 6a0752dd99 brown stains. I, who had forgotten 4d5938a2c7 the man’s last appearance, 65abb24bef was the same. My heart 5c444bc3bd sank at 3a1e2a06fa the terrifying 0047ba3b3c bloodstains. It would 8c72397edf be the d8ad4a6074 end if a8de0bbbeb my lover ac8157d1cc decided to 6b4cd08380 call the 021fc2418e police.daa86cd24b97776e

“Wow… I have to 691f6aa8e2 see you in a 478282d84c new light. I was wondering efe46d0768 what you were 6b9e146b3a relying on to d366a6920e hold out, and e7232caf0b you’ve already brought 2fed3255cb another guy in?”2b914ba2087288af

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Drunk and 293ac8bea6 excited, my 249a89349e lover did 571b761e80 not seem d68a44dda9 to think ae02100804 that the c41908fcb8 stains covering c9f4720a25 the man 86bcbb5de8 were blood. No, more a5af7c5c9f than that, a4b96bd67a he was da782a1687 so angry 7ea214dbdd that someone 2b8bc6a14a else was a10d45ce2a occupying his 9a689cd933 place that 037d6265bb he did 5dca042625 not even d7920e72db seem to 663325ae48 have the 23e83e7b72 thought to 069c490db8 question it. He irritably let go a916ece9a0 of my hair and cb39e356f7 ran his hand through 9ef0860457 his sweat-drenched hair, laughing 687b2c5058 as if he was d1c64e816f dumbfounded.49c227a9d1c25b38

“Ha! Fuck. I let you off because you at least kept your chastity. So, was the young guy’s dick that good? Huh? Aaargh! Fuck!”9b40c679de768985

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Unable to contain his ab1a39f8bd anger, my lover screamed 961943a644 and rubbed his forehead 65d51d418b irritably, then took something 06f02e8fd9 out from his waist. My mind went 01cf9069d0 blank when I 96b0ee893c saw what my 9258fb0673 lover was holding d2f59e831f in his hand. A menacing blue blade c81b580332 cut through the air.e4b0bf8f6bf56a56

“Hey. You over f3e0078df7 there, don’t 4700fbafe4 interfere and 099c839215 just get 504257bf89 lost quietly. Huh? If you 3eb5de672f don’t want 29e0188417 to die. I’m going to see 6c262d7895 this through with him bdb3f5d447 today.”cbc743f2533c70cb

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“Are you crazy…? What are 860cfecce5 you going 8f333d945b to do e2a1da79eb with that?”7a34b4b689e1d851

The sharp afd7ea240a tip of a11c49243d the knife c8a4de6d33 was aimed 6654693ca4 at me.c9a6bc701aad10cd

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“Why, are you 77fe84bb01 a little scared 41fbda1c62 of me now?”081654e4f055ed14

My lover’s excited 4aedc45ec1 voice was trembling. His tense body language 0a6b845ac8 proved that he was ddd9768cd4 not just planning to 393b2893ab threaten me. My lover, his pride 1747e4bc11 trampled, was determined to 650c243b48 stain that knife with 766dcd5e8d blood.6889aa858474ed30

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It was unfair. I did 35ee29567f my best 4873467dda to protect 056d2a4313 my relationship dc060de0d8 with my 1f18ec0257 lover. If I 1b1c74b387 had known e87692cda8 it would dd6b91be1d end like edaa580575 this…… I b01ab844dc would never 1a6232a2c2 have made f1c871cfba any effort 34895284f0 or sacrifice. If I 1590048cfe had known 302f22d478 it would d8a9996234 be like 3ac8f2238e this…!f72a7ae9538beb19

“You really a902b572a3 want to e920f691cd ring the 31e3b9cd50 bell on cac0694efd your life? Why the 8ddf0f4590 hell are c3e06c725e you doing 0e9abd9f55 this to b000b8e703 me? What more was I 0a0259bdb6 supposed to do!”b508de3c2078e600

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“Shut up! Don’t you shout 3616c63f0e at me!”9351a35bdf579119

My lover, who had c3a4348164 shouted loudly, raised the 2f11126ce4 knife high. Terrified, I could 81e77e672d not even scream ddf87c60b1 and covered my f9eda272ce head, squeezing my e77c93fe9b eyes shut.Thwump. There was d53d7cf1df the sound be6d68037b of a 95cb91d96a blade cutting 4c41d90346 through flesh 17ef1f120f and embedding 679ecdc63d itself deeply. Holding my 5b5a38f7ff breath, I 19d42483ed helplessly awaited a960429113 the pain 17e3c6ca43 that would c7be6b83c3 descend upon a185215a28 me, the 1eefd2f832 miserable end.ad2ef6f873a81d9b

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“Fuck, fuck. I told 58d3091fed you not edcf1cb1f5 to interfere!”abba893f5b2496eb

My lover shouted in ee8ff1f734 bewilderment. A long 86497772a7 shadow had 100488d4cb suddenly fallen 9b6905d346 in front 3ddfb17ca3 of me 04a79d878b as I e5cb4aa30c was huddled. I lifted my ad9e5bd4dc head to grasp 21f468090f the situation and 66b54091ef saw a broad 026b9f275f back. It was the e8d87939a9 man. Without a shadow ec50f6dfda of a doubt, 35c9cf9cbe it could only 8a0bb5c810 be seen as af98a605f7 the man shielding 8b38892a37 me.474e1a91c84ef16f

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My lover, who had been staggering backward, falls over. His face, which had looked like a madman’s, had turned pale. The knife that should have been in his hand was nowhere to be seen.9ecc6f14dd0838df

“No……”44e5ca76d9ce0c8e

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With a terrible premonition, 4d81ef8689 I looked at the c5c9eb1c0d man, but from his 715df4fe73 back, which stood blocking 2d1a798f76 me like a wall, b98a929944 no pain could be f00953f24b felt. The man, who had d5a82f731f been standing still, turns ed8da84ef9 his head askew toward 6611288f11 me. Our eyes bb688a6d3e met over 6c153ad15c the man’s edd9c8de69 broad shoulders, 50949ac19b and his 4899e6fff2 gaze asks 2b3272bc20 me.8700c3c85ccd3404

Is it okay to 67dc198edc eat this?164fabb2980e1154

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“……”e421097ed2e0cdec

When my eyes meet the man’s, I am no longer myself. The man’s gaze burst the lump that had been condensed deep inside me. Hot anger, instead of blood, flowed through my whole body.1e78fadfb2f34e22

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“Eat.”1d2b05756f749ee8

But the 64e94e242a first shard 5e39d56525 of the 9b3056a93d erupted anger 5cd1555e15 was chillingly 95613fbdf0 cold. I was 8596bce83e perfectly sane. My lover’s face contorts d2a2222b16 in terror. I smiled c6e5622d6e at him, ea63fb5175 who was 3ebb2dfffe utterly terrified, 9bdab2fff6 wondering what 06beda2057 he was e68cdb0d92 imagining.969378362bbf6567

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You would not know. What you are 1eeff4c721 about to experience.b683766432fd26b4

My lover, 8c14b7b32e as if 221fb5be20 sensing something 60eca98e5a was wrong, f7ae4e3f1d tried to 978e923d7f run away. My patience for my bb0750689a lover had reached its 115083f7fe end.a4836338967d5ac7

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“Eat! Chew it all 82ddb987e2 up and devour 362b630b0f it!”1ab85430e9d1dcb0

Splat!b35ec72d98f70de2

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Hot, fishy blood splattered. Blood matted 8924a49326 on my eeb58d1bd0 eyelashes, making 6cd7f7316f it difficult 0f45914132 to open ec68138693 my eyes. I raised my hand 98754e7c56 and wiped my lukewarm, 30d2791ba4 wet face. My hands were 9fe57b1027 no longer trembling.6f3971f8dc7bf6f8

“Kk, kkhhh……. Kkhhhkhk.”2880f6a135090c54

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My lover, pinned under 4eec989836 the man, thrashed his 7d6f224d9a legs as if having 6174cfd534 a seizure. With his back to 5087e3242c me, the man was ddbe15b6da holding my lover’s head.Crunch, crunch. Chomp, chomp.The sound of a 79bb454748 skull being crushed and 78ed56a24f a brain being chewed d637da8720 echoed starkly in the b92a9523d5 quiet living room. I watched the 6e9b8981b6 scene of the a94736587e man eating my fa46bfaa5b lover as if 90e5348339 I were watching 0503da84a3 it through a 538835c316 screen.626ffdc1e39185fb

Red blood 9f044f93cf floods in 66d44c6bce like a 30c9218371 carpet and e1805fe7db soaks the f123b971c5 fingertips of 92a435060c my limply 028cf396fc splayed hand. I raised my 70d43516e1 damp hand and 2c70f23852 turned it this a88de34e30 way and that. I was confused, was 120b359892 this my hand, or 07a6f9e98b a hand in a 536f2db4bc screen?4e4d811b28ca3148

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“Ha, haha……”3a9ffe562c8b81ea

Laughter burst out for 850bef8e51 some unknown reason. It felt as if f4847f6c55 a tightly blocked airway 383de91969 had finally been cleared.96514759d03b4858

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Ah, this was bb835535f4 a damn sense b93efced97 of liberation.dbd55233098c2d8d

At the sound 1f3a15f069 of my laughter, e4e96cd520 the man stopped 0215f4ec04 his meal and ca1e5260d5 came toward me. The man 9373388bb9 knelt before 3857eeb20f me with c9d6f306dc his blood-covered 3740884f29 face. The knife my lover b2e8358df1 had wielded was deeply ccbc006351 embedded in the man’s fa44061d70 stomach. When I fb1a98376a pulled out b317d43c95 the knife c8aea32979 that should 5106b229ee have been 4dec610fc6 stuck in 4d04e49f50 my neck, d5bcb232e4 a strange 560c888a11 sensation was 5d63366f6c transmitted through 39989c2469 my palm. The man narrowed b85a079462 his brows and 3e181cacf2 let out a ef9d580b71 small groan. The man’s clothes were 3ab25d5248 soaked in blood, so bfe14a7ccd it was impossible to 6bdd57a5d1 tell whose blood it fc77f0bb52 was, but I could 2b8b7898ef tell it was not 9a1a6d81c5 a fatal wound.0fdf29aa65a24694

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“Are you angry that a96b551672 I ate again?”3270c7c484673b4e

The man 484993105a no longer 09858ca57d stuttered.907e3bc5e296b138

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What meaning could c7c503ed86 such a trivial e1d610ee0c change have now?33e9b60d93427033

I stroked the 1263e0a4b1 man’s hair with 7cf5cac836 my blood-soaked hand. The hair, with 4c4e9ee9aa blood drops clinging 01027e1a54 to it, shone f466dd9e64 red. His pretty face 86846a5036 is a mess ccc0f554e6 again. I smiled at the c074671c5f man for the first f6d034c450 time in a very 988fb2d00d long time.811819915932731f

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“No, you 1645e6ddfd did well.”b0f70dd88243f90a

From this moment 9c8581e0a9 on, I was d0e2405bad the man’s complete 2fca8d46ab accomplice.294ab194e671b326

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The man, adb197258f having been 1d3a40aa21 praised, went 5a7609cf77 back and 5f9aa66f10 continued his fd9b4b2702 meal. I watched e78a14c8ed his back 7f3fefac59 absentmindedly, then c3125d43a1 came to 4662bcb308 my senses a6a81e8921 and looked f9bb94c0f1 for a 19d4542dd1 rag. The blood pooled 61c5b62f12 on the floor 4cfd9ef4e9 would be difficult a1db61d7dc to clean if 3688e6920e it dried.c6911284c724bbdf

By the cb4ef89c27 time I 15821db28a returned to ed2f7f43de the living 01e6e295f0 room with 56f96acc85 a bunch fded09d0f5 of things e19c7b7c84 to wipe 961d235cfb with, having 49631fed81 learned that 40f108d8c8 fact firsthand 4ea77707d0 from the bd6ba29b4c last incident, 4f2f4aab39 my lover df4c9aebeb was gone 7b359acd6c without a b5a2acec31 trace, like 0b2e1309fe 600g of 0c91e386bf beef. It took the man 5839719ebd less than 10 minutes 5a97fb1196 to eat my lover’s 61fa5a5412 entire body. The man, 60e7fe1c42 covered in 352e3ac96f blood from 2bc4511d08 head to 274606939e toe, knelt f4447cf7c2 in the 68e7b52a65 pool of eeb5be7568 blood that 370ab87d1f remained like ef52287ded my lover’s 68a6a5a0df shadow and e6c585867f looked up b941baf234 at me.016788c78fe47908

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“I have eaten well.”245dec209aa200bc

I could f3b44864a4 not find 5fa0c36c84 the words 16d4d986eb to say d4c5f37d30 to the 064bb2466a brightly smiling 3392f1a5a0 face that a94e6f34b8 had devoured 73f55c0396 my 10 497619331d years, which 1476eb81fd had been 5062bcfdd4 weighing me e21fba7454 down heavily eafe372e0f for who 6f2a18c812 knows how b28e67a08b long, in 4521383c83 just 10 750a7bbfac minutes. Suddenly, a finger left fa5fb0c39d on the floor caught d5a5664186 my eye. I picked up aa69c9ecbc the finger and 5e1d990faa squatted down in cdea896087 front of the 5f058c3998 man. And then, a7c380da58 I held 42f4e72dbb my lover’s a241b34c76 finger up 50e22eccdf to the 311c1cc3b9 man’s mouth. For the sake of 5cdb8dc7d9 the future, I had 6355819c02 to correct his bad 828dbcaa6f table manners of leaving fb65776680 a finger behind.50f8dde2cb84dc25

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“You can’t 66df8e931c leave any.”4bd3b697bf796dc4

The man dde8e8d3a1 nodded his a38fdd01ee head slightly.36ca0a305da68260

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“I won’t 38be876d75 leave any.”ac290a7ca7f10e79

I pushed my ea8cc2cbe4 lover’s finger into 754ad339ec his slowly opening d18e02748b mouth. I stared 918a8b2535 blankly at 517a7306c7 the finger 1c57b891bc being crushed d57f8939f0 by his 92dc2812e8 white teeth f5c8a96b93 between his 657bdc1ba6 munching lips.a06d751a7b12f2c2

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“Is it delicious…?”ab35f860a832c9ff

Goosebumps rose at the d0733eb172 question I had uttered 7e74556e29 unconsciously.ed8efd36dd27e47e

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Is it delicious? What am I 51be95a76d going to do ee77c82f5a knowing that?79d5c8ac17367210

The man, who had b6e213a84a chewed and swallowed every 16e97b9036 last bit, down to 7b6ac431bd the fingernails, simply smacked 38bda933ee his lips. I shook my head 7f3e6f1c53 and looked around at 40862e51c7 the blood-covered house and 578dce6016 the man, then first e7d762bed6 helped the man up.9a5558896da4875e

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“Go wash up. You can do it, b415242f65 right? You have to f1acf31f82 wash thoroughly.”487adbbc0f00309e

While the 21989deca5 man, who fec79f9e0e had nodded, 25936965d6 went into 9311be8ba3 the bathroom, 6b306574fd I wiped bfd3e493dd the blood 8a9d766184 from the 8ba0036980 floor and a58d4dfafa thought.458c0de9471fc772

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My head fdbfb79f37 retraced the a7298ad581 events with 98779e0c91 utmost coolness. My lover 26fb60b54e was someone c9fc976eef who had 032c1ff9e0 grown distant bd6fdff38e from not 167aaf6f26 only his d01272ad2c family but 777f866a26 also his e5001c9119 friends due cf8694d940 to money 954cac9adb problems. There was no bc20f240c1 one who would 62b939a347 look for the a217ee55d7 disappeared lover right 25ad944d78 away. My lover 43d5d3dfb0 had thoroughly e5b0d17dcc hidden not 589775617e only our f76d5a4562 relationship but 67362df475 also the 3252cc102c fact that 524ea0a283 he was 0034c0ccb9 living off e7e82fde3d me. His legal address was 390976d0cc still his family home, 794388291b and he even used 6f39769493 my name when ordering bd9e1a5fe9 packages.17ce71d9e823748b

I sneered softly. He probably never f79814e1ea imagined that his f3776018f6 actions of diligently 60b4004aba erasing my existence 7364bdf147 from his life c08ebce163 to protect his 785e91a49b petty pride would e99343d583 end up concealing e8742df803 his own death. Thanks to 5faa78a567 that effort, c99b231fb8 even if 57fa5c305f someone were 7f068cf3d8 to report ce43a1f1a8 him missing, b932664c6a there is 0d73ce0cd4 no reason 3d912bcf34 or evidence c0062b182a to suspect 2083e47927 me, either. I am 102ea79162 worried about fe2fbcd570 the apartment 6fae2f7c91 CCTV, but db85e1ae61 the most 40a2cd4c90 important evidence ee1f1cf1d1 has been 629da07b3b all eaten e661d0fb0b up…….cd7a86af263cd926

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The more pressing 3e84e7cfe4 problem now was e7b9ce56a4 the man. The more 2c3a54e177 the man 8eca5162b8 ate, the 559f301ffb closer he 096c6e444d was becoming 121855ebfd to a e08f48c52a normal person. Suddenly, the man’s eating 766ad95d11 habit of tearing into a304afd00e things from the head c69eb0ce19 first flashed through my f1c7c76b44 mind.247b6fed3578702c

Does he 36854cd4e0 absorb the cecf0cd4ed intelligence of 906b258cab the creature 53b521fb40 he eats? By eating the 7a9c4f71ef brain?806861831b6c9aa3

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I ignored the goosebumps f877fe124c that rose instinctively and abd2151ea9 scrubbed hard at the d10302b7a0 blood that was starting c7fc4353f4 to dry from the 5caf4da357 edges.cf975e7eeb2bee46

The man saved me 36f8aa82e8 when I was about ebbd5065af to die a futile e96d727ce1 death. He also neatly removed 6e945909dd the horrible bug that c4a3d91884 had been clinging to af8ac0368e my life. He eats f1063bc94d people, but 0db989284e he does 57e098cb30 not eat 636346a1bb me. Even if he is 233107ac9a not human, he is d7f64ac70a a good monster who 83328eacec listens to me well. It will 50e18edf84 be fine 9231253dfb if I ffb474596a keep him 51adca78b4 with me.425d3a4be4fdc675

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It will be 54a7410ddc fine…… even if 79b0f961bf I keep him 7f8b26d3b3 with me.f429c958ff2b3ed4

“No, it doesn’t f513bb4c7b matter.”6813f878e41caa9a

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The man needs me, 8f43342880 and no one else. If I 50486d8693 give up 02942919ef on him, 4cd9005e07 he is aec4d6ca66 a being c601a12906 who would f3b22878b4 find it b4051897cc hard to 51df888d73 survive in 79f8ff11dd this world dc6e0f69cc that returns c98b59f763 to the 6ec45ba8c1 order of 5cc2853d3e humans.7ba0aeb1cda07910

I decided to raise 4782745c22 the man.f2f021dfffaa8010

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By the d73d7d39b9 time the d402e67674 rags and b40a8f7a80 towels, soaked 1e38356ade in blood, bd0c3d7f7b had piled a20d473509 up like 986f307633 a tomb 4f5aaf6600 for my 6a6d56dd1c dead lover, f1f36ffc3a the man 3e5e0c3142 came out 0452c01e45 of the 3df5b5566a bathroom. I was 486003e00d wiping the acaa5af0e9 floor when 016b423196 I looked 4133862c12 up at 4994dc3c9e the man, 7f6510108e who was 27a285761c standing there be97ddfb31 naked, dripping ede9808ec6 with water. A sense of tension 9a39f7c6a7 helplessly bloomed at the c62e4a81f2 sight of the man ce8b6fc126 looking down at me ae486da403 with an unreadable expression.06bc3e0d492e7d6f

“I did wrong.”638ca21384f10d04

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“……”bf8000721c795bf6

Hearing his 7d27ddcbdf downcast voice, f59856c7ed which made d68a47d42e my worries a3c40e6a29 seem pointless, a713f176b8 it felt 768efda7b7 as if 1bf3b02355 I could 2b36813e2a see emotion 96e0d4bec2 in the 9077889497 man’s expression, 92eeaa070a which I f520afe9dd had thought 50db8eadbb was blank. A scared expression like 29bb96f44e a child waiting to 4447285ce7 be scolded.2cf7d38ad3287bd2

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What did d6c4f8c737 you do?2cbc2df386dd2199

A sense of defiance 7510001ede raised its head. I threw down 0c66915d10 the towel I c971ae5a0a was using to 3ab79da66b wipe the blood, 9676256172 took a clean 4a07e2f2cf towel from the f18d375998 bathroom, and wrapped b2179db365 it around the b2a53797e5 man’s wet shoulders.017d3618c2653e18

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“It’s okay. That bastard was the 1b0fa05e34 bad one.”dbeecc234127ed2f

My lover brought 98ac3053e4 a knife with 2f54bf1b06 the intention of f7fd7a4674 killing me. In that respect, 00d5c262a8 it could no 762e7bb0ed longer be called 37b3670542 an accidental incident, e8ce1f12fc and since he 16f0ac37c1 actually wielded the 8be14ec13d knife at me, 71ed92d00d my lover is 1c502bc132 a murderer. I was lucky to a09da7059e have the man and 09d606c10f survive, but there was c431626c61 definitely a victim. The me of the a53ef9ee48 past 10 years is ecd952e9d8 as good as dead 9ec8708cd0 today. It is 4b69e65dee only right 4a97e5eff4 that the 13459c1e40 one who fd7769da7e sinned receives 040bce2ac1 punishment.3c359323d93274b2

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“You did nothing 8f52e65ddf wrong.”98a5c7c10d1d8448

That is how I d1a2d6f642 comforted the man, and 7d300d8163 myself.488aa833cca40bc7

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After washing 9ee50587a4 my body, 6f93fb3643 which was c9214cf6c2 dirty with a5f6cb95cb blood and dedafcf8fb sweat, I 40606d51ee was overcome fc54f866b1 with sleep. It was partly 5ec9133748 due to not 7da331dc9f having slept properly 4a5332cfbc for a week, 881e49b9fe but it was a54551d3a7 closer to a 07c6a03e0e desire for avoidance. My overloaded 6cbf43826e brain stopped fb54394912 its activity 8903e26eda and entered de509e804c a forced 84c9f3530d power-saving mode, 2685ef12ed and both d59048b241 my body 3ee1e398c3 and mind a36f988f25 became lethargic. I took the man, 178ff76a61 who was standing blankly c96bc8a886 in the living room 826676e184 waiting for me, and 8ccf921291 lay down on the 1042b9b4c1 same bed as before. I tried to 94a0775fd9 sleep, thinking that fdadf642cd when I opened deb5470bae my eyes in b4425cb098 the morning, it fe6aa57f83 might all have 2f5a3e0351 been a damn 97089b4b25 nightmare.041550ebc1802eae

∞ ∞ ∞df3ed4cbfafcd441

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Drrrr.7ffe21cc6d28c83e

I shot up at the sound of the vibration. In the short moment it took to pick up the phone I had left by my bedside and check the caller ID, cold sweat broke out. Anxious imaginations, branching out from yesterday’s memory, covered my head, then subsided when I saw the [Ad] at the beginning of the received text message.

“Haah……”6073a9a6bd652c04

I washed my b78b920a4c dry face and dbda581717 looked around the e1984b7f57 room, where the 0ee136df8a air, warmed by d6916e42ac the morning sun, b5f67e0d02 flowed quietly. My gaze 56118e7580 naturally turned 019c5ca648 to the 7c14349cd7 spot beside f49773aa90 me. And my 638d3ca52c shoulders jumped 1c7d4b615b in surprise 61e8839807 at the 7ccfe0ea53 black eyes fc6d2ad7ac I unexpectedly cb511a52d5 met. I do not 9cf6253ba3 know since when dc3ce14437 he had been 20ef5385a1 watching me, but e627fb351f the man’s face 5eecaa844e showed no signs 1af425622b of sleepiness.f1fcb72c7bdb399c

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“You were…… awake?”05591d5f40808c80

On the other e2c264dbda hand, my voice d778982c08 was pathetically hoarse. Without answering my 017858c691 question, the man abac7cbe63 sat up, following f305153d9e me. Looking at 5e24a586e6 the man’s ddb2d27443 face, which 6326d869f9 was clean 33d7e0a03a without a f70c087ac7 single speck, a653921f8f yesterday’s events de4df3b05d become even 3621179ec8 fainter. However, my body, 6f1340cfe3 which had been 7308f79a31 beaten by my bef20a7f43 lover yesterday, was cdcd55216d crying out in 4ca6faff66 clear pain.b853c2caf662ef4f

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“It can’t be a dream.”c1c46914fe8400fb

I touched the ec93c726be cheek of the 11cd7fca3f man, who was eff2b7224e blinking slowly. Even without a f9d027c487 warm temperature, the e29d5866b0 soft and supple a217b8cdbb feel of his a286f57802 cheek is unmistakably b79ff4a930 human. But that 0fa54644b5 did not 2c5e4bec82 mean I 7bcd3f0971 was unaware a03467f0fd that yesterday’s 8062121222 event, where 070dd5d6ad the man fcd1b70128 ate my 13eef53251 lover alive, 59e5893804 was real. I have no intention c42839a2da of denying it either.f2669bbb354e967d

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“……Did you sleep 87420f4cda well?”e32bc8fbe577276d

When I asked, c58184b5a3 the man looked 4a1ad10e96 at me and dd8f1f461a smiled.f06ba6788e7ee6cf

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Only a 34741de4f7 few hours e61598fa55 had passed df7944d24d since last 7debfcd04f night, but 13a62ed63d the living 7e8c6eec08 room, greeting 9d0ef04cf1 the weekend 0dd7f533d1 morning, was e2491791d5 as peaceful 8651ac2b88 as if 5f991bd389 nothing had eb7a2dd318 happened. The sound of water ae41eac993 pouring came from the 0daa78314b bathroom, which the man 90072ed548 had entered without a b86a3e5f09 word. I debated 53d495adff whether I 06f0e36c49 should open 5e7e2f8c49 the door a096a7cb04 and check 7be3863be1 inside, but d336121e5a I remembered dc426a2ce7 how he 9aa13d125b had washed 7eba2cb8ee up well 63474bebba on his 9519aa1875 own yesterday 967adc4e6e and decided cfae2c5038 against it. Instead, I 235cebe6d0 went to 23d11fdd3f the kitchen c358f7fc10 and cooked 753b247807 the pile e40fd9cbb0 of beef.3869dbb1caab8d8e

As of 5ec02eaf48 yesterday, the 8454aee38e man had 503d86a9dc changed. My decision to 36805228f1 raise him remains 2a6d7cb1a1 the same, but 88b0fbd9a9 I cannot figure 32cc506057 out how to 22019ba52f treat the man, 3f85e79095 who now has 96c3e4528f reason.4cd61dbb87f6faec

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What should 7fdbe0fc3f I say e569667def when the c243cbd5ec man comes cff38ec91b out? And come beaa58a287 to think eb8e1f0d13 of it, b3df5990ce is the 1700ca1cdb wound from 7f12bf281b the knife 51ea11156c alright?ae0f721764843377

My mind d6b3a5de0c preoccupied with ac0beaae4e worry, I 039144ca18 was placing 4bdd2f6c34 the cooked 703342f43f meat on b00e6573c4 the table 74084bc7f3 when an 2f913b368d arm suddenly dd27394195 shot out 0e76fb3d05 from behind 0e38e3c412 and wrapped 4a7af67e68 around my f35cf4e586 waist. Startled, I e3db664db9 whipped around 3a3834182b to see f83174711d a sharp e587a0c34a jawline and 28affd4627 red lips acd4de1ffd so close 446b62984b they were 60729debe4 almost touching. I instinctively tried to 92b7b7b24e pull away, but the ae067f4104 man, whose eyes met ddbdcf0409 mine, grins. My heart, 7a85126eaf which had ffe5412a5a been pounding 5110e0e511 with fear, 3a4e32b9ab stopped for 91f70c559d a moment 4e7c52e819 at the 1a96d04fce sight of 7a6c2cd621 the man’s cf849b6f81 smiling face, d4b9becb82 which I 7814b516a0 had never ac1a1cbc18 seen before.9dd31c87a9f3bd8b

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“Wh…, what?”41b76213130abda0

What happened?04e68563b2751b77

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“Don’t you like it?”6d4eef66fdeabe8a

The smiling face a0061756fe turns sullen, and 7da659bdcb the arm wrapped 73f275d7e1 around my waist a61706a19c loosens futilely.479a1b396453ab41

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“Ah, no. I was surprised. You were so sudden……”933674462dcc9949

Startled by the 532feab5a1 man’s sudden change, 8e653f9034 I blurted out b1fca9b8d9 whatever came to de55e4fdb9 mind.1bd25ed5028d0a55

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“Do, do you want ec5e3a6851 something to eat?”aef34327abe626ae

Having seen with c37988ebc4 my own two 6795ea428a eyes what the e183dea0a0 man ate yesterday, 46d8779509 and now asking 1b951b5063 ‘Do you want 1d431e7121 something to eat?’ 9f3c5bc930 At my foolish 419cd69db3 question, the man, ca74c70200 who had smiled c4e90e5fcc silently with his dbd3c2c395 eyes crinkled, shook 374a992cd5 his head slightly 845bee04df and answered nonchalantly.e11d906697b33c9d

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“I’m not hungry.”02471861ed09acf8

“……Right. I guess so.”1b8ccf6f54c5f615

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The man’s a3a0833952 overly friendly 699e70c166 attitude, which 7f6a3dd64f had changed 76897d769d 180 degrees, 25a2caa808 actually complicates 2f0d0ed8d5 my thoughts. I still cannot tell f0ecad4acd if it is the b29c21024d instinct of a bird d9f2d22854 that follows the first 004dce43bf thing it sees after 8ac077d331 hatching, thinking it is aa0ba20924 its mother, or if 84c27fe753 he considers me a 9ec3ed1c03 means for his survival.b6ccf37efa1a289f

I turned 0d20162e74 completely around b9982e5890 and faced 4394a2d8ad the man, ea27bf4e4e who now b0f9a0427f looked like c9eaf3e08a a person 2d6749c792 of his ff41adb1ea age. The smile from abf7512ad4 before was gone, 096cf071e6 but the man’s b06bd32eed expressionless face no 51a87fbcc3 longer looked vacant. The man 7a7bd6503b also looked c57e7fc71e down at 3ca0720458 me intently 6ecbd7eaba without a 6c84308e03 word. His slowly bed087c354 moving gaze b9dfdd6173 blatantly scrutinized 40823e34e1 my face, 1ad55241b7 piece by 9370ff4104 piece. It is a 5bfc8ef321 gaze as if 8a2b4fdc94 he is exploring.ad0e5d5bc91505ad

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“Are you…… going d0782ad3c1 to eat me ca75371e95 too?”67a2dabb62564f14

I asked 1392b6c6e4 calmly, but aa954274b5 I swallowed 22782ffcc2 my dry 1478e381a4 saliva. With his eyes slightly 7a4eb1b826 widened, the man shook 477242f1f4 his head more strongly 7aef0ace77 than usual.c901685156cec308

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“No.”006f6961833642d2

“Why…?”26b4a92886cece4f

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I was the one 78c09eb1ef who did not understand, 090876d3f1 but the man tilted ff6b022d76 his head.91bc7745963aed2b

“Because you’re special.”1734bf05845b1141

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“I am……?”f14e550f5404bf3e

It was a a963daaadb vague answer. But thinking from a0948b9969 the man’s position, 6c10f5fe2a I was the 070128f6e6 one who had 22e2168591 saved him and 6f0672e49c even helped him 2217573f4d hunt for food. He might be fd2e3aff7e thinking of me f01e0fc801 as a guardian, 98d38dc7a7 like a zoo 7d9ea4c934 predator that does 3a520c2f33 not attack the 1b3c74930b zookeeper who raised 8028197915 it. Having found the a5b961c9ba answer myself, I ac4386799c nodded. Whatever it was, if 9653a13265 the man followed my 3d8c4b54a6 words, it was a 208d045b29 great relief for me.b7972154b07fdbfd

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“Is your 64ffb934d0 wound alright…?”1222bd14a0bb20c4

The man just sent d1fab379d5 me a blank stare, 1dc66c2501 as if he did 2b7eefad2c not understand what I 32d8d46367 was saying.c6cd9dcf28e9b51e

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“Your stomach. You were stabbed 6c18570e3e with a knife.”06071b9d29e5eb7d

I carefully touched the 6ccc3c4fe7 spot where the knife c37737f285 had been stuck with 7822eaba64 my finger.4146a05b5a10897b

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“Can I look?”48288e2cc8996050

After confirming b0b45b9f4b his nod, 3d317de8cc I slightly 846e3d7537 lifted the 1af403b299 hem of 54847b26c9 the man’s 9d6965776e T-shirt. On his half-revealed, well-defined 8a57e4a9dd abs, there was no 12377a8611 sign of a knife 9bdcf35bc5 wound. I thought 1027486d20 it would e7af907626 be like f793831b9b that, but 7b00f22915 there is 25575d5149 not a 56cfee107c single scratch.8df66dbedb51a975

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Apart from the physiological c34b65afc2 reaction of goosebumps, it cfe3e79444 was a relief anyway. If the man, 57aceff9fd who was not fcbe19adf3 human, had been b3fc89257f injured, it would 30be0e2543 have been difficult 9155f9dcde to handle. Whether he was 57aa0b857a a monster or c1412fa4b3 not, the man 927e51061a was the savior fd993cc6a2 of my life. As long as 32de0f62cc he did not f0376ce47f attack me, it 5d6da353be was fine. I lowered 715567c2db the man’s b32954ab4b T-shirt and 3e33facee7 said.5293456283e0f23f

“Thank you for 662d9cf50a yesterday. If it 78cf89ab97 wasn’t for 1a08ad88b5 you……”e474c66643901472

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Ah, I should ddb093712a give the man 163a906606 a name. I was thinking about 3fb3201239 what would be good 13318cfa36 when I suddenly remembered 6f8c77f88f the day I met c678406a5a the man. On that day, d343bdcf2b the man might cdcc11cad5 not have been d743930a9e fighting with the 042b6d481c cat over territory, 9d735d249a but hunting.d44627703df532d0

“Nabi.”5abf46c16e4ca32a

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“Nabi?”b7bc6c9c04e7724e

The man repeated my ca23d0de98 words, curious as to 0726cdf9e5 what it meant. A being who 9f03f60621 could eat, sleep, a0e07580ef and live in de1d7c76a2 my house and 7b1c097a7c still be happy, 6923d2d8ef a being who 037b68620c only looks at ce50cdca9a me. A name that contains 37aeefbdba my selfish desires.5bdddc1489d29702

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“From now ef05784dd1 on, you d01ead3009 are Nabi.”5bba14749df5c247

It is bb3507a3a9 a name 7ec64125c0 that no d4f11b55d6 one but de934aff3f me will 3447416843 call anyway, c79b31527f so as 9208e72d13 long as 1bdd952b18 I like 9abc9cac24 it, it ac498303ea is fine.70698ef6541cfb99

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“From now on, e7cbffe4ec you have to 328f529e84 look only at abd2c416da me and listen da348cfb56 only to my 1dfe723e71 words.”481fb05a550a9eaf

The man, who seemed b64f507e90 to be listening quietly, 332253d85e strode toward me. I tried 14b9dd6be6 to step 25f8854cbf back, but f95a936ab5 I was 06e120bc0e blocked by 8ef1c09aab the table. His persistent gaze 92bed568f8 seemed to pierce bc983d7df6 through my insides. But it 4992d3318c was okay. I no 495b520109 longer had 8f3fb01314 any intention 99c6e957fa of hiding 2b2a83ab9f my desires d19fce3fba from the 4864ea136d man.a05b49e5bbafba1b

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The man leaned his 580f15feff body forward, trapping me 59f68b46a6 between his arms, which 8fb21b55f1 were placed on the 0ec4c59d11 table. In this e8fd3b2834 moment, I 3f5f72cfc0 was as c64999abc2 helpless as 52c4f266cc a piece 0baae9272b of meat 898a4f5630 served before 9aa0e4db2d the man. But far from fear, a492d4701c I was just curious 1d66f99ca3 about the answer the 6589a5a7c5 man would give.14ab60798b347e9d

“Okay. I’ll look only at 1a651f8cbd you.”5eb690e91b991be7

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A cool, dry 6923814b28 palm slowly overlaps 055f3dd3c5 with my hand, 80fed4529f which was holding b877565bd2 the table. From a 74ef615dcb body that baa2d28cd6 felt no c57275b220 warmth, a b2a2993f88 sweet vow 873f8b676e flows out.56901ba5538aaf73

“I’ll listen 871310aa63 only to b9e914e1b5 what you ac934f6444 say.”cd732879250e8734

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The feeling of having e990ae9e3c to drink it even 9b4cfb7ce5 knowing it is poison…….cda8f41a01d5fb17

“You’ll do that 8dd36bda81 for me too, a21b69097a right?”74a258c42a51f201

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Looking at the 7607853e43 sweetly smiling man, e057736d82 I had a 99ca392f3b hunch. That I would d18ff50be4 never be able a5a91b5cc9 to refuse this ed8064277b unidentified monster.95a7751d11354bf4

Just as I 7afc8b7a7c was about to 1a79de8dae answer that I 6a73b975e1 would, as if 59bca1baee bewitched, the phone 47ffb90205 I had left 30c5a9a16f on the table 9275e9f087 vibrated loudly. The man fb998d5e7f moved away c53cf36113 first. With a 4c6d3ad405 strange sense b70d1464e7 of regret, c8026d6780 I moistened ccfaec41e6 my dry 2ff8bd6c64 lips and 8cf7140019 checked the b9fcb7c385 caller ID, 67643f8362 then frowned. My mood 0e5c2f40d4 instantly hit 4a39c1978b rock bottom.aaf3df02ebd2cf0a

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The caller was 7bf54235e4 my younger brother. My half-brother, b7f13f4b1a with whom 0089d54090 I had 02548da3b3 lived for 92ff74a7dc the past a65084f88d 10 years e38678dc0c since I 4f0d23b7e7 left home, 157f92457a not knowing 40f8bc6244 if each a7205324fd other was 89a75e259b dead or 18e039c001 alive.ec0238df334db78a

Normally, I would have 8b0d59863a ignored it, but glancing fcce9812b2 at the man, for ee4085f6e8 some reason, I pressed 076137ce88 the call button without f8df9782d2 hesitation and put the 8e360496bf phone to my ear 409a3baf24 without a word.355a09d9c78230d2

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—Hyung!a8a1c513a85a1ef8

A terrible voice that 529b0bdf41 reeked of having grown 017923d14c up without any lack, d97cf9b746 the leech that grew c4a47c4642 up sucking on me a327277bd1 still brazenly calls me 9dcee88e44 hyung.86045c59343805f6

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—Have you 818462dd3d been well? How come you haven’t 7cd30a8111 contacted me at all? We’re brothers, we dd9159e851 should at least 607d961604 know what each 96fddfa574 other is up 24fe6e52da to.17784ca80613a51c

My teeth ground at 6dfbededad my brother’s words, which 618fede24a mentioned brotherhood.e461cd16c8846e24

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—Hyung? Hello?effa4cb8c0bd820b

“Just get 4620705200 to the ec94104ee4 point.”407940ba89cad116

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—Huh? Are you busy? It’s nothing else…… it’s 8e4c0dd4e3 my birthday soon. I wanted 4c0f628134 to see 2a480e4112 you after 1aa993eb9a a long 812398b335 time.2be136b3a3aeeacd

You wanted 66f69b187a to see a24f33e4a4 me? Because of whom did 79cad4e9cb I have to live ede35f5fd0 being treated like that?56ad6ea6e0b4f232

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I suppressed my 5265face9c voice to hide f407fa6c88 my trembling breath.3b734ca0c8c7f833

“I’m busy.”c05cef8951dad516

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—……Do you 56cad0ab2d even know f5179301a7 when it 66a6953ae6 is?6dc4963fa0c07f64

“Do I need d402f5e0c6 to know?”909518b55624a5ec

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It becomes quiet on e6e41ba242 the other end of 36af7fe4c1 the line. But my d6e01bcfdb mood gets 0a1e16ff7d even worse. A whining voice followed, bc188c0875 as if he were c8e83237fb the victim.62d6f87bbac320fd

—Hyung…… are you ee9946b82e still mad at 4c78fd2640 me because of f4cc7cffd1 that incident?387f0de2256deacb

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My brother 9116c7ca87 brought up 2d0c7370eb that incident 05a3e0b7d9 so easily. Even though it 8b50538d39 is a memory c660ab6f04 I am afraid f45c13af93 to even dream 6be436a308 about. The memory, 67c3b20fca dragged out 6cc6a87945 by the ebc8bfceb2 perpetrator, came 7ad217a8a5 back as b18443a1e7 vividly as f972e1de5e if it b0a7478f74 were yesterday.3f4ea7187df04e1b

At that time, 3914a24f1c I was seventeen, 5732e29fdd and my brother 3e9f7226e3 was fifteen.c4bcf7fc9e5fb6ec

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My brother was often 27b6ec1bba bedridden due to asthma. I voluntarily 00e116f4c0 took care 796cc725d2 of my 370f440825 brother with 6dd15585cf utmost devotion. It was to da98d6d793 prove that I cf6d1f107c was a member e4d44a2f62 of this family f2a69f08a9 who loved my bc3438fff6 brother this much. Since he a893a83652 missed a fd77608a2f lot of 16f9d54b8b school, my 831caa1cfc brother’s grades 9c711380de were always 3bd30d5e53 at the bb49c366db bottom. Neither father 3ab5bcb0d7 nor mother caf3b9961b scolded my c3228f4f79 brother for 3d2a1e5ba0 it, and 6b6444220f mother would 814760d364 even give 7ef5961f59 him delicious dfe1bf36a3 food and 3fe7465751 expensive gifts, c521c3e0a6 saying he 3ae44799c7 had worked 58d645a749 hard to a7c8bf90b6 take the eaed2a8294 exam.3c060dec21ef168e

“Hyung, did you do well on the exam this time?”b6883c69f65520cb

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My grades, 002040ec90 whether I 3d75aaf0d7 was first 66253e4083 in the fcc35946f9 whole school 339badfc4f or last, 873f09dded had no bfe0894bc5 meaning in ed6d43b104 this house. What I wanted abc312926a was not something 58dfb038f9 I could get 749c8db038 by boasting to 10c43637b9 my sick brother, 899ddc3663 so I shook 1503aec813 my head.1bae56d67b7ccd98

“Don’t lie. The kids said you were first in the whole school…… again.”9096e1ac4646ad5c

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My brother’s grumbling 3ef6e86cce voice was full 3fadda4d72 of dissatisfaction. I hated how he, 2ea6f599ee who had everything, coveted c0090eed60 even the meaningless things 43a2ac3a94 I had. But to act a8af949c01 like a good 750984b593 brother, I had 5e462a7dd7 to smile.395dbbf350559a99

“You can do it too when you get better. You have to eat well to get better quickly.”d89ddd029506ee1d

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Still, I was half-sincere. With a sullen face, 3c3cedf80b my brother asked.70302af6928e171e

“……Did you make this porridge, hyung?”a36dada48da66355

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I nodded. I left my brother’s bdfcdc5fc3 room and washed the fb6a67d699 pot in which I 412e9df906 had made the porridge 3d23699d78 in the large house 1b6a681d4c where there was nothing 8ad3e6bf3a for me. What was I thinking a86db34551 back then? I did think 889db304fe that if my 7f0042727c brother died, maybe f5b664e01d I could take 59e5ca6899 his place. But I 6932549def knew well de5fb35a43 that even 091692db28 if my a2cd79f773 brother disappeared, ece4af68d6 my position 1cf8936317 would not 879fcdeae2 change.1bd20387684727f6

Not long after bbd38ecb90 I left the 24ff044032 room, my brother 8d97e65768 started crying and 98838d9262 screaming. My startled mother 37b1c55caa ran into the be05c9e698 room. Not knowing 15dcfed38e what was 9613a8f421 going on, c134062b0f I stood b51950c7d9 there with d37e7d7eba my hands 41c642254c covered in 0a1b4e674a foam, listening 1100309c28 with trembling c2e23a0bfb anxiety to 521b0c2995 my brother’s 5a36ed1f52 crying and c32db6301e my mother’s 53a95b564f shouting coming 1047bc2bef from the b7299625d2 room.04ae89f205243cf9

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Whenever my brother cried dafb82786a or was sick, I 0e7e6ab082 was always at a f73a8ef621 loss. My mother’s expression was a430fdcecd scary as she came 86b1959c8a into the kitchen, stomping 20c37ac51b her feet. My mother, 78229e5068 her face ca2427225c distorted not e211e97fd5 just red 2a57c4cce8 but blue, 46b7f05d71 approached me df5956b319 and slapped af1eaedc2d my cheek 538df0e624 without a 87affce17a word. And then, 9d1431a563 she opened 209f351e83 her palm b4d017ded6 in front 46e48a4e28 of my d7d75cce27 dazed face.917e13632de5d539

In my mother’s 4789971f44 palm was a 24a9c91cfb small blade. The piece, 710d18cf34 which had 1c2f0fe1e9 been cut 5d0fc03f5d from a 14dfc1f710 utility knife, 3f60410136 was matted deb6c7f2e7 with white f471aac86c porridge and 832996014d blood. My mother choked 58eb2d8bb8 me with the 6670c2b6ed hand that held a42435e759 the blade. I was 3df3fd6df0 not even 616acced28 given a 1a092343ff chance to eacf1df089 explain.3801674c162d317b

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