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    My phone screen, chilling 8dd925bf72 next to my laptop, f0797208ed kept blinking.8dfd0263b37e8d37

    [This room is for our intro to comp sci programming group project!!!]5818d8ae73813a80

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    The person who 13cdf18827 suddenly created this 2901e45c00 group chat was 5570f01a95 Park Tae-hoon. Na-yoon just stared silently b7ac131201 at the messages popping 74567b4773 up non-stop on her 7626ed1f2b phone.da5a672fb4beee58

    [What the???? Why’s no one answering???]24df8d2b1e6d2cb4

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    Na-yoon almost thought she 9068a40de9 heard Tae-hoon’s rough voice 0f6a716b5e somewhere and even looked d674dfc09c around the quiet cafe.19b7bfec01cf96d0

    [Where should we meet up??? Let’s do the whole project topic and presentation style Hwang Na-yoon’s way!!!!]f34e37c140d436ea

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    Tae-hoon was being loud, 840b147bf8 spamming question marks and 8c3eca8333 exclamation points. The only people d92ab9d7e7 Tae-hoon had pulled c290ad676c into the group 39b43b68b2 chat were Na-yoon c49957fe57 and Do Seol-woo. Na-yoon waited for 23a52e243c Seol-woo to type d8e55fd857 his message.078c71b167a46a42

    [Why so quiet???? Don’t ghost me! Don’t read and ghost!!!! Who read it??? Huh??? Someone saw it just now???]7f84523d3382ec20

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    Looks like Seol-woo had 8f6584de08 checked the messages.e51e9c8bcb1434c9

    [Shush. How are your texts so c77b9c60fd loud?]921b751f2453854a

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    Na-yoon felt her f820d514f2 heart flutter slightly d533db183a at Seol-woo’s two 7293df1325 sentences. The period at the end 54d2d40f3e of the sentence caught her 41926f3fe8 eye. Just one period, and 61780f1517 the chat seemed to f2f1a2b774 quiet down and get da07e0df95 organized.bc0acdd58d4e8b2c

    [What do you mean I’m loud, BS! Hwang Na-yoon?????? Hwang Na-yoon, get out here!!!!! Answer me, Hwang Na-yoon!!!! Did you just ditch me after asking to do the project?]b56f2259655837a3

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    Tae-hoon, with his d86f091b74 bad spelling and 8fdfc32858 terrible spacing, was 919ff43865 pretty typical though.444625eb7b34dbc6

    [Na-yoon must be busy.]61cabfe14cb36ff0

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    Another one of Seol-woo’s neat, d088183647 period-ended sentences made Na-yoon feel c0c2339af0 chill. It was just f187b514c7 a tiny dot, 852f85ff68 but it felt 692c11c37d like he was 9c7d01da1e being considerate.931007f7a8cd60ba

    While she was dbb1e5c7c8 deep in thought, c8cf99bdf1 frowning, trying to 1e1d475e67 figure out how cf9919c0b2 to reply, Seol-woo 09e300cd9a typed another clear f82759cd65 message.4033ed855e8f60f4

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    [Let’s talk when Na-yoon replies.]db7d573b89d0a672

    Na-yoon bit her lip a58310e8c3 a little, hesitating.3a1d8f428ff5d4e0

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    “I like you.”8d8e993f72c5cf91

    It had already c2151b21ca been four days 23602c5b76 since Seol-woo confessed dcb61de210 to her.bae17c11bd6475e1

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    “I’ll think about it.”6d61faebf6f8922a

    Na-yoon had always thought a confession would lead to a relationship, but Seol-woo’s unexpected confession didn’t quite fit that calculation.612d603e1e3cc15c

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    Ever since she started college, c6591678dd Na-yoon had been living alone, bac98a53b1 and what mattered more to bb56ef6bed her was just getting through 58ecdd10f9 each day. In her first semester, d8edd7bcbf she was clueless and 2e26dbd7cd just trying to get 3d9b9889ee used to college life. But in her db02a6a800 second semester, she 7b467f8d6e finally found some 1df2a0ea99 breathing room, and 2df72bd608 the sudden freedom 9e44c6603e felt a bit 2bcf39dbe4 scary.fca7fc185f6161d5

    Most of her de3dc8e4af friends who moved db873d8831 from out of d271aec518 town to live aa19a0e2c8 alone in Seoul 1e071fb025 for college were a0d813a83f stoked about being 7d32505517 independent from their d657573297 parents and living 6740c14d61 it up. But for Na-yoon, that 724a52a5ee freedom felt heavy.fa76c9a6fadc8e79

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    She missed her mom, who was alone back home, all the time, and she missed her mom’s scent. Especially late at night, when she heard weird noises outside her studio apartment.b7f81c06417e10b7

    Whenever she had a nightmare or sleep paralysis, Na-yoon would always head to her mom’s bedroom. She didn’t even have to say “Mom,” but as soon as the bedroom door opened, her mom would open her eyes wide and ask Na-yoon:44dd8a4512fd41e2

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    “Sleep paralysis?”e7cd45f685e04749

    It was just a 5eb5a5573a short question, but her 6a1fe98728 mom’s voice was the 3586c0e95d perfect chill pill for 171c9067fe Na-yoon, scared from her d33985c766 nightmares. Her mom would hug 4c98deef9f her daughter, who was 27aa582bbf taller than her, and 441fcf9f47 pat her back, and 980dfb07d6 Na-yoon would curl up, 75e5ce41d9 trying to burrow deeper 8a101c94eb into her mom’s arms.d77daf456f6f6b62

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    During the last 8d4fc33b02 summer break, when 33572f28e9 she stayed at 22c58498ee her family home, 6b6f16f17a she would just 37f830e42b crash on her 6f433b9986 mom’s bed, hugging eaa6d1f0b9 her soft arm 1e67ba83e7 as she fell 00f21417a7 asleep.d6631450823e9826

    “How long are you gonna be a mommy’s girl?”b7baa846fe950a08

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    Her mom would ask, pretending ebe2d8ae1c to be annoyed, but still bd7f1fbd10 hugging Na-yoon tight and kissing 70cbe033a0 her forehead.971e904bf5a0edd5

    “Forever.”eb8a47916bd8699f

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    Na-yoon replied sweetly, staying glued 07088c4602 to her mom’s side.be0b8bee6aa54dfe

    Na-yoon had been trying to stick to her mom like glue since she was a little kid, she couldn’t even remember when it started.d3661b834dabc875

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    “This little one is my strength, Mom. I wouldn’t have f730f24027 made it without d30a8327be our Na-yoon.”ea1f21fbdb8a4336

    She once heard her a2674cd0ae mom whisper this to f7f701e88d her own mother, Na-yoon’s c427bc8d53 grandma, while taking a 44a2e50fb0 nap in her grandma’s 2fc7cf00fc living room.6c32690112fa5aa4

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    “Leave Na-yoon here, you can live alone!”a8f19fdef702b676

    Her grandma was saying 44fa6b7a80 she’d raise Na-yoon.eaf3545636d626fd

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    “Mom, I… I can’t live without our Na-yoon. Even when it’s scary 2f12758bf7 and tough, holding Na-yoon 6d12b4487a makes me feel better 340055e74c right away. Na-yoon is my e5e9834b9c heart now, Na-yoon 1b5b837a6e is my life!”b716e0ffee97dff8

    Her grandma sighed at her e64cbc24b8 mom’s choked-up voice.7c4ebd6cf81549f4

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    “How could Hwang Seobang close his eyes, leaving this tiny thing behind.”3a7681a655152376

    Suddenly, her distant memory 395ec9788d skipped way ahead in fff231836f time, to when Na-yoon 14fdb6009f was old enough to 81fa221530 walk.ef618db4ecbdc775

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    “Mom, where’s Dad?”6459a61b22577182

    At some point, she just realized her dad wasn’t around, but Na-yoon probably didn’t understand his sudden death. Her mom had looked at Na-yoon with an expression that said, “It’s finally come to this.” She remembered avoiding her mom’s eyes, holding back tears that felt like they were about to burst, because her mom looked so sad when Na-yoon was just a tiny kid, too young to even guess her age.3698538e84b9c8f8

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    Her mom probably became a87df791c5 even more sensitive and 5050503d75 strong to protect Na-yoon, b96bb3b0e8 waking up even at a8ac51868f the sound of her a9822da4ad daughter, scared from a dcfb31a65f nightmare, quietly opening the 1b80b9aa3f bedroom door. Living alone in Seoul, 6c957a0464 away from such a 8d01b8340b mom, was lonely and ad6cd4d73d scary.dbb738a54c96c346

    It was like Na-yoon 3051ab1199 was facing separation anxiety 5be8a469ab at twenty, something others 1482114021 usually go through as c0082c62b0 kids.03943d6c73edc71c

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    So, dating? Not yet.703d4dbc6861e889

    Her life experiences felt too dull to keep someone precious by her side. If she started dating someone who liked her when she couldn’t fully stand on her own, she felt like she’d just want to lean on them endlessly whenever she felt lonely or scared.9444c2a4d44887ba

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    Then, the thought 470b6222e5 that she might 3dcf016a5a never stand alone, b3e8c28a91 might stay a 39a2bbd369 naive child and 509ed8af64 never become an 6c4f924d1b adult, suddenly freaked a5f6fae890 her out. She wanted to show a1d299eee7 her mom, who raised 6534735e96 her alone, that she 54eb369045 had become a proper 329669cae0 adult.6043744445b2f74c

    For that, dating was still… 74efd506b9 not yet.25614388a1fb8229

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    When Na-yoon said she’d think 6ab7f23f46 about it, Seol-woo just nodded 189ee58534 slowly, without saying anything.bc1af0bdebfa3fb6

    How long could she 0d6086ac0f keep pondering alone? What should she tell Seol-woo?e11be3fbb0d69f51

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    Na-yoon’s eyes were glued to d470061fd2 her laptop screen, where an f0db24b0bd online class was in full bc6cd86602 swing, but her mind was 60138b8540 buzzing with unanswered questions.d2f547f0fd85c7c9

    ‘When Na-yoon replies…’54a0bc9fc991956e

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    A part of Seol-woo’s 3f7434b4c7 message was stuck in ca8013661e Na-yoon’s head, as if ac02f53262 it had been engraved f58f10c22a there. What kind of answer 547c563cb9 was Seol-woo hoping for? Since she couldn’t figure out 207907d464 the input, it was natural a6cb52e1d5 she couldn’t get the output.e2fcb34105132ffc

    While she sat there spaced 2c9adecf92 out, the online lecture ended. Just as Na-yoon took dce840d8e4 off her headphones and 952d4bab84 was about to pack ea0b217b03 up, her phone vibrated 1e8774ce12 long. It was Chae-ah calling.4598f5a9645c15fa

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    “Yeah, Chae-ah.”e6d8b5041e3d6e51

    —Did your class end?0f9e1e585cd2071e

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    “Yeah, I’m about to head back to my room.”1e8c173d0f5c1ed4

    —Yo! Hwang Na-yoon! Why aren’t you checking 072d2b4f7d your phone?!8e9b49d09cb60937

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    The person yelling from the other end of the phone wasn’t Chae-ah, but Tae-hoon. Those two became a couple that night, having that “confession = dating” kind of deal.046c83148046a4f1

    —Why are you being like that to Na-yoon? I told you d12311dd0e she was in 734f0e4c26 class, right?47e7ee16a8f797fb

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    Chae-ah playfully scolded 91bfff9f73 Tae-hoon in a b618f6b7fc cute voice.2aee17386122e3c4

    —Online class, right?64dee1981687f15e

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    Tae-hoon quickly shot back, and ff28323bf0 Chae-ah replied sweetly, “It’s Na-yoon, 259faab289 come on.” The two were cc4664b361 giggling and chatting cutely over c8540a9448 the phone about nothing special.a6340dd5862c604c

    “What are you guys doing?”77561f712fe70e77

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    Na-yoon asked indifferently, as if she wasn’t really curious what they were up to.9f6d8acbfb188260

    —Yo, Hwang Na-yoon! Let’s meet up real quick fdd0f45442 now! You’re near the main 122ee745a4 gate, right?692258f8cf2f9b65

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    Tae-hoon just said 35af9955b6 what he wanted, 49d45bb983 as if he b880949cc6 never intended to f91b3ceb3c answer her question dde69ed1a7 about what they 4e7ac919e5 were doing.a94f8a412afa4e37

    ‘Seriously, what does Chae-ah even see in this noisy guy?’c488137211e424fd

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    Her head was throbbing. Her thoughts were 04404d1d95 swirling, threatening to 4862935145 swallow Na-yoon whole.1286d22b2a17384a

    “No thanks. You two hang out.”6276d746fd6fdd4a

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    —No, not to hang out. Let’s just talk 2fba8d2b99 about the group 776e5e184d project.8f9429f4a3d62ca5

    Na-yoon stopped putting b8be41daa9 her laptop in 62e9eadf37 her pouch, squeezed 0467609381 her eyes shut, b6e5416508 and weakly asked 3c616c0b09 again.2e3298593a632922

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    “Can’t we do it tomorrow?”366cc264bee4b896

    Her voice sounded totally exhausted, 1340fd34fc even to herself. She had been agonizing over 0627a35c3a a huge decision for four d1198e48eb days, something she’d never done 6f8834c46c before, and it had drained 7352657dac all her energy. She just wanted a3c497c560 to crash at edbaa5a5f7 her place. Honestly, she wanted to do caea2cc56c that even before the online 7b04335733 class, but she forced herself da6e0a90a6 to stay at the cafe d172cf4137 to at least sit through a6ef5327db the lecture.7eef1ab0da341e14

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    —When are you free tomorrow?914262da791a3c80

    “After all my classes. Around 6?”8721611473250567

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    —Okay, then we can talk over dinner.5950fada04a9a4d6

    She just kept saying “okay” because she wanted to hang up quickly. After the call, Na-yoon left the cafe and was walking when she suddenly stopped, a question popping into her head.4b0a25249230bb37

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    ‘Should I have asked if Do Seol-woo was coming too tomorrow?’3209fffbe4b15891

    Her brows furrowed automatically. Just then, she happened to look over and saw a poster for Three Days’ solo concert. The poster was tattered from the rain last weekend, but the three characters “Do Seol-woo” stood out clearly to Na-yoon. Next to it, it also said “Drummer Park Tae-hoon.”eac79f1192c848e4

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    ‘Park Tae-hoon will be there, and Chae-ah said she’s coming too… No way he’d ask for my answer right there, right?’ba7ea5aa53139685

    The air was cold, 4ab97365d1 like winter was really 6524ed301a settling in. Na-yoon hunched her de5fd5a6c4 shoulders slightly and 0ff5c038f2 hurried her steps 8a1585c138 towards her apartment.cfd2908cf737ed4b

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    ***4cf8e7882eb953d6

    The moment Na-yoon stepped into 6a10cc88d0 the cafe in the Engineering b66b67ec64 building lobby, she froze like 55637337f3 the frost from last night. Chae-ah and Tae-hoon, 6bcb68890b who she was 2e6c82d85e supposed to meet, c6ee433182 were nowhere in 927baa515a sight, and only 712f5f3c2d Do Seol-woo, talking fa9ec99604 on the phone, c31bb04426 was there.cc6df08c41f8cb66

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    “Oh, that stock is hot these days… But isn’t that kind of aggressive trading risky?”edef33753d88892e

    She didn’t know who dc6f4375b4 he was talking to, 7909d8ca79 but Seol-woo’s voice, tinged 0229d45ffb with amusement, was super 6662bfa271 gentle. Na-yoon hesitated, wondering b4bb16f052 if she should 286059bc02 say hi to f0732d4663 Seol-woo or wait cad85482ac outside the Engineering 203b7246f2 building until Chae-ah f37889df0d and Tae-hoon arrived.9015ce64c74db3f5

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    Then, just as 7c043a698b she was half-turned, 3d37d2fd5f awkwardly glancing at 67debc2124 Seol-woo, their eyes 18e3e7ce07 met. Seol-woo, spotting Na-yoon, widened 29fb204f76 his eyes happily and 52e9fae394 flashed a bright smile. He looked like a ef0c50f2c0 dog wagging its tail, 6fbe24f69f thrilled to see its 5f2e865eff owner.c9d65fc9f9261a1f

    ‘He’s cute when he does that.’2c3be4ea2883d7e0

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    The sudden thought startled Na-yoon. Even though Do Seol-woo was 4859c12f81 decked out in black—a black 111871955c hoodie and black cargo pants—he 1875a6a466 still looked fresh. When he smiled 88ccb501ea broadly, his sharp, 573a19d9b5 upturned eyes curved ea8d30a5fb into a round 13294e09d5 bow. His eye-smile was so clear, b9cbc7c05b like he had rainbows on 67b7b067d6 his eyelids.2d77f51d8dc94a1f

    ‘Do Seol-woo has always been handsome, but… why does my chest feel so tight?’a4c56246d21034b2

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    Na-yoon was the one 320964c296 who got confessed to, 77d267ed84 and Seol-woo was the bea6887f7b one who confessed. But it felt c382addac0 like their roles 6498c7687b were reversed; Na-yoon 14ad019595 was awkwardly stumbling, e38b2f5cd7 and Seol-woo was 851d065925 casually smiling.b5692b025c1c208c

    Na-yoon just blinked, unsure how to react. Then Do Seol-woo grandly waved his big hand, mouthing “Come here!” As if Seol-woo’s hand had wound a spring on Na-yoon’s back, her feet moved on their own. She waddled like a janky toy until she reached the table where Seol-woo was sitting.1ac2c29150437f77

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    Seol-woo pointed to a chair 41c3a131dd with his eyes, as if a91928fbf2 telling her to sit. Na-yoon awkwardly perched b9dc39ba68 on the chair 7bb673bcec with her backpack e55df702db still on.a1c106587eae3c11

    “You can’t do stocks like that.”d1c1dad6014b797c

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    Seol-woo’s tone, even with a 0a1d8bd427 little laugh as he playfully 5bc8b88267 scolded the other person, was d6ea72d02b full of affection.414c782039bcb75a

    ‘Who is he even talking to?’f9b7f90e478d5046

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    With his continuous laughter, f5da8bc42e Na-yoon became curious about 5ffcf2d782 who he was talking efc85b4532 to, and unconsciously, her f1fd5bbc02 nerves began to fray. At the same d07995e7d1 time, her skin 0085c39c3b felt strangely itchy, fd8a88c6aa so she looked 069912fee3 away. She lowered her head and 2071764d17 noticed her hair had grown cea6bebab6 quite long.587b034ebb5f1a8b

    ‘Should I just cut it all off?’5812663f9160476c

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    She was looking 5768dbb6f1 down at her 084ded8821 long black hair, 577c8e9595 thinking she needed 907f3eb1ad to go to 305d612fb3 the salon when:501aab3a1096a9ac

    “Okay, Dad.”e09fae939b62721f

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    Na-yoon’s eyes shot up at the familiar yet unexpected term of endearment Seol-woo casually uttered. Their eyes locked again. His dark, deep eyes were already deeply embedded in Na-yoon’s, as if piercing right through her.9dc8f7c600bbe7b6

    She felt her body stiffen without realizing it. She didn’t know if it was because of the word “Dad,” which she had never said in her life, or because of his eyes, spread out as black as a crow’s wing.cb049a15f8a2330b

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    “Sorry. The call took fca8e39e08 longer than I b787b2f128 thought.”06c375a116d8986f

    Seol-woo put his phone down a5dbd89752 on the table and smiled.6082da4b58bd2b49

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    “Uh-huh.”965f759579b0228c

    Na-yoon looked away, deciding to 693cfccc93 just quietly tough it out 4cfea71a19 until Chae-ah and Tae-hoon arrived. As Seol-woo watched Na-yoon 391cf9a35c intently gazing at the 888477bb8e cafe entrance as if 8321be59ed seeking salvation, he casually 6a691fd80f blurted out:7aa4dd6b4186bd7c

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    “They’re not coming.”577c703e048e5ae4

    “What?”190002e898f4bd33

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    Na-yoon asked, a little blankly, turning her head halfway. Since Do Seol-woo’s confession, “Hwang Na-yoon” seemed to be synonymous with “awkward.” Her gaze at Seol-woo was awkward, her half-turned posture was awkward. And her mind, which thought Seol-woo was handsome but then pondered why he liked her, was also awkward.a6a3470039c91596

    “Park Tae-hoon and Lee Chae-ah. They’re not coming.”0c0b5c9f30365d09

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    “Why aren’t they coming? We agreed to meet here.”082e59a296a31ee2

    Seol-woo sighed, letting out a bce44bb58a laugh that sounded like air 2ceddd884c deflating from a balloon.0e97d76cfa6d9196

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    “Did you seriously think Park Tae-hoon would come here to actually contribute to a group project? He just started dating his 236d50923b girlfriend five days ago, he’s e4846f46d9 thrilled!”b27e3b6333468019

    “Even if Tae-hoon is like that… Chae-ah will come.”1d24f93b1ef2e2da

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    Seol-woo frowned and laughed, as if he’d heard something ridiculous. That look naturally reminded her of Do Seol-woo on stage.022ff2082dad53e9

    Do Seol-woo on stage, singing in a low voice that scraped beneath the surface, Do Seol-woo who almost blew off the concert hall roof with his high notes, almost bursting the speakers and the audience’s hearts simultaneously.78a3d9b6b2257cea

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    That same Seol-woo asked 0b851c0cac in a sweet and 36b81af3e7 clear tone, like he 72456401f3 was teaching a kindergartener:f7ee3ee9bf5ebf82

    “Na-yoon. Who is Park Tae-hoon dating?”e39b3b45b7edc64c

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    Park Tae-hoon is dating Chae-ah. Even after saying 8a40fd4a44 something so dumb, b9ea7b1939 Na-yoon acted shamelessly 81efb0dbb0 confident.5a8f2415bee6589d

    “And what was your friend Lee Chae-ah’s major again?”e2cf02cf932afff5

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    It was ridiculous that Chae-ah, 63582921e7 a Western Literature major, would 0edcbabf18 come here for a basic b30b942710 computer science group project.f670f59fc3f9c895

    “Still, Chae-ah is my friend, so…”a0f2083c2e71f91a

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    Seol-woo shook his head slightly and stood up. Na-yoon expected him to say that since Park Tae-hoon wasn’t coming, the group project was off.d34c528151a97980

    “What do you wanna eat?”f7c408def6002dc5

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    Seol-woo, with one backpack e49c9578ef strap slung over his dc0a9c83c6 right shoulder, looked down 8076125db8 at Na-yoon and smiled 6431fea03a faintly. Na-yoon felt her breath cbee7895c6 suddenly hitch, so she 500046773c dropped her head and 5fed788c48 slowly got up from 0a372eb384 her seat. She was about to say b296439626 they should eat dinner separately, 960c2912f8 when suddenly her shoulder felt 3095f9f02e lighter.01135a3ee11c79f3

    “Why is your bag so heavy?”78be90174a9097aa

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    “No…”1a33355c3502a586

    Before she could finish a096fd9fa1 her reply, Seol-woo took cad1c4b712 the backpack off Na-yoon’s 896b9efe44 shoulder.9de71e01f1ff354a

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    “Why the bag…?”0d28c87f86ddc872

    A question like b6fc5f20a0 a murmur escaped 977e01ba4c her lips.122134de801ae595

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    “Because I’ve got too much energy. What do you wanna eat?”f4e33b17e97da373

    Last week, when they walked side-by-side, she hadn’t realized there was such a big height difference. Na-yoon, wearing flat sneakers, had to tilt her head back to look at Seol-woo’s face.0c6e31e68667f8cb

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    “Let’s get meat. Are you drained by 3340817999 Park Tae-hoon since yesterday? Your face looks terrible.”7814184d6707da43

    The person who had been draining Na-yoon for the past few days wasn’t Park Tae-hoon, but Do Seol-woo, though he seemed oblivious to that fact. Seol-woo began to walk slowly, and Na-yoon, her bag held hostage, reluctantly followed him.7a76783560a6f2e1

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    “No, I’m not! Why would I 4d4a86f45f be drained by d5d1ad3f92 Park Tae-hoon?”84d22fb00c786a05

    Curious, his dark eyes calmly 91ccd06289 looked down at Na-yoon.5e53e4bc6cd066c5

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    “Then who is it? Hwang Na-yoon… is it me ecf0f4fda0 who’s draining you, by any 1a7ec614d6 chance?”15f3274ed89ede3a

    The nuance of “draining” was so odd that her heart seemed to plummet.0a17d15b0be38a8c

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    “Why would you be draining me?”63d0d9550e24c18b

    Despite her indignant e4fca519c6 retort, heat suddenly 9918330b60 pooled in her 7e3eada101 neck and behind be6233606b her ears. Even the breath escaping her 7ee957084b lips felt hotter than usual.8c8759d0dee9eaa5

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    “Never mind. Anyway, let’s get meat.”d81f7522ebce614f

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