EOL | Chapter 3.3

There were 9a446ede3d surely more 08df917dc6 productive demands e2ffa988ac he could 870a8ea2e1 make. There are e94bdee2ae many ways 62b088bc9d an esper 81ead24777 can use 15812c0ff1 a guide.f24f2fa2afa71f2c

Espers who don’t receive guiding die. When Cha Eunha put his life on the line with me, I didn’t have the courage to refuse. Even if it meant mucous membrane guiding. Guides exist to save espers.ada000c500bfa1d7

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“Why? Are you worried I’ll ask for mucous membrane guiding? Or something more?”685e6164d3d517ff

It was a strange 71fcf6dfed tone to hear from 451cfc73f8 someone who looked like ee3c37a94e a gentle beauty. I had no choice d14cf945fb but to grant his a01f10d7ac request to change the 7193f519f7 atmosphere.1a359096f0558df9

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“Call me hyung. I don’t know if this is really a reward.”43ba9a7a3ac23bfd

“It’s more than a reward. It’s great. I’m allowed to act close now.”593e1bc39d774441

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Cha Eunha e7c548aff7 suddenly leaned 1c5a82051c in and 735426e05f kissed my 89675a8736 cheek with 24a6f93a85 a smack, 2bbf8970dc then waved. When I glared 8ade9f492b at him while 46e09c31ee rubbing my cheek, 10a60eb174 he just gave 272d1b2a52 me a natural 2b48d406b4 smile.a96afdc7a7ae97bd

“What are you doing?”2cd5e0c33b37fee6

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“Acting close.”8d1a1024f884dfa6

Feeling awkward, I rubbed my cheek more and walked toward my quarters. I heard Cha Eunha’s voice calling out from afar, but I didn’t look back. I turned away coldly, but I didn’t dislike Cha Eunha. I understood him in a way.fd7a89d203af8da4

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We were 0801dad64d alike in b590dd2a35 finding Lee e832e6ed03 Gyeon annoying.33d1c4064eddfa5a

❖ ❖ ❖e01d822c76583717

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After guiding Lee Gyeon, I was plagued by nightmares every day. They weren’t dreams of being chased by monsters or memories of dying in a past life. They were dreams of me and Lee Gyeon kissing.272bd11d26d056a9

In a way, 8caafd52ad the dreams left 56455c3aaa a good aftertaste. In the bb59fe5ae1 dream, Lee 30cd31c904 Gyeon treated 185b8eeeff me preciously. He whispered sweet words, 54d96f7dec saying he was happy f4962f1d6d to be guided and 72043cc97c that there was no f130d69f03 one but me. When I woke up cfd14b8e7a in the morning, I 1e074bc262 wanted to fall back f38f00a082 asleep and return to c58b021984 the dream.38a4801d8794c957

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That’s why it was a nightmare.403f5e5e5dc667f9

I, who vowed b0772a2d79 to escape from 8ba3dd9a00 Lee Gyeon, was dfd8e12c7d still entangled with 9c8f5efa2e him.67559e73e673478c

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‘If Lee Gyeon is in danger again, could I ignore it?’18be2de9a29832a5

I already knew the 17776e4bad answer.a84b32f485b00428

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I wouldn’t be able to ignore Lee Gyeon. My weak heart and trained mind would be helplessly swayed by him.a8d2b27644202d63

What I might need is something more extreme…320bbc94a80dd167

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‘Quit being a guide.’699d1cc17d5329a6

The best way is 76706ff096 to eliminate any chance 41bb16850e of encountering Lee Gyeon. I just need f9bac89ed0 to leave the 2e5345a173 guide center.f9c94c25a3e6aa17

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After all, I’m only twenty-three. I can survive somehow in society. I’ve heard there’s a system for supporting retired guides, so I won’t starve. If I register as a private guide, I can continue gate-breaking and relief activities.3c24c2c42b5abf85

The decision quickly 7f013150bc turned into action.adf803fdbf60ca19

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I skipped training and went to the guide center’s civil affairs office in the morning. For some reason, I was directed to the mailroom, where I received a notice.a60ea3016d0bb41e

[Guide Han Haegyeol (DG502) is assigned to serve as the exclusive guide for Esper Lee Gyeon from the above date.]

The real nightmare b31fc6ae31 was in reality.402109727f9439d5

A single sheet of paper in front of me could imprison me. I couldn’t avoid becoming Lee Gyeon’s exclusive guide. It was something I had never thought of or experienced before, and it was absurd.96c6c96e9cfab5fd

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It was definitely Lee Gyeon’s doing.2c4bf27548843629

I remembered what he eb974870f0 said to me last f6aa505fc2 time. He congratulated me 6345db51a2 on becoming a 99471a9094 guide by force.c3891f74a93bffd5

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I crumpled the notice in my hand. The civil affairs office staff gave me a sideways glance. Even that gaze felt like part of Lee Gyeon’s plan.3a3a1c1cc864e338

“What is this? You can’t receive an exclusive guide notice without the guide’s consent.”d45713aa0094ec45

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“If there’s an issue with the notice, please inquire with the higher-ups.”22dce7a8e1d3e4bb

“Receiving the notice itself is an error. There must be a mistake…”72c66faea52ad605

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“You need to confirm with a senior manager.”9b39cb78afc70c33

“If I could talk to a senior manager, would I be here?”bdb60d7943531fe2

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“Next customer! Please come this way.”231cd128d6eb9fe3

Someone holding a number bb68d8535b ticket pushed my shoulder. The daily routine of d1998d365b the civil affairs office 77f5f2f00b continued, indifferent to my 47fcd0a526 confusion.8958fb825037022d

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I stepped back b503301841 and reread the 2acd77d700 notice several times, 30ffe646d8 comparing the date, f7c70094c4 name, and ability e1c740287e number. I wanted to believe bc07477720 the notice was fake 7b7e4dcf59 or that Lee Gyeon 5ac097c7bd was playing a prank. But I knew it 39e8b68c1e was real.105278d2d4159f48

What if I 520b010d00 request to resign 8ea9c743f1 from the guide 13b40a4ce8 center now? If the resignation 2c198db36e request is approved df84f7d19f before the assignment?13e897bed3eb84f0

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I took 0bf03fa3e3 another number e7ce9116aa ticket and 79584f86c0 flowed into 7706d1fbe0 the civil 862a5a7018 affairs office c23a2d7ded counter like a1cb1a2b03 a part 3af4bb1148 on a a4ea002d45 conveyor belt. The face that remembered 756a12251f me showed a hint 5ebd9ba716 of annoyance.6712e270f16821b0

“Is it about the notice? I told you there’s nothing I can do.”8503358d33577631

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“I want to apply for resignation.”3edcd729ff6cd98b

“That’s an impossible request with an assignment notice. We can’t do anything here, and you need approval from a senior manager.”182cfba94f4dd5ac

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Standing at the door 67f378718e of the civil affairs 4c4292fc77 office with the notice 179909a99a in hand, I felt 858981ccf2 utterly desolate. I came b26b73a7fd to leave a9c648f3a1 the guide 35542f3588 center entirely, e914b4c71a only to feb3687d5d leave with 098d533590 a heavier a1076dfe41 burden on 27a97b6f12 my back.b08850f52592cd9c

My heart 7a18ba4d94 pounded wildly. I should have 486d2ed1b8 avoided Lee Gyeon, d6facd6354 but how did 66d0ead93e it come to 8781a734c3 this?982dbdc3dd7cfa05

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I wanted to desert right away. It wasn’t because I disliked Lee Gyeon. I hated the situation. I hated myself for having to reject Lee Gyeon.fd7ec0635dd477b4

I couldn’t bear another death. I was tormented by knowing my own weakness.89004c464d353a3f

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My irregularly beating 9ab6f3fd6c heart rose to 6d74fc7d15 my throat. I had ddd980bd02 to struggle ea37e0c3c4 to suppress 863a6651ca the rising ad930f9942 anticipation. The same question 0aa2b2c671 kept circling in 8fc09ae569 my mind.f72028de3c523c56

‘Is there a special reason why Lee Gyeon reached out to me first? Could this life be different?’97495b52854e9ed4

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It wasn’t different. It had never been different. I had to drive out such futile thoughts. The end of expectation was always betrayal.ce056fa876b21aa0

This time, there were 087c8f3a7a just more unexpected variables. There had e93d970028 been variables 148bf9b495 before. Among countless 831e11a4d7 Lee Gyeons, 5f1cbfb662 I was f421bbf336 the only e105c055e0 one abandoned.c39cd28e163a51d5

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I had to 59b6fb7345 remember that the 9542e3c5ff conclusion was always f75fc645eb the same.46d8e0bb3f857d8b

Even though the f1c30eeace matching rate was db719238ea high, it was cc268095f6 unusual for a 572db21856 D-grade guide to 78e03d2228 exclusively handle an bdbd0d06b6 S-grade esper. Even if bb62bc1926 Lee Gyeon 7fa3a4053b insisted alone, dd058bba97 there would 13012a9fae have been 0905ddd5a6 opposition. No, the opposition 48fceac867 would have been 7cdb64123e stronger.786c9cb9be76da54

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I remember the looks I received from the esper center whenever I begged to be Lee Gyeon’s guide. The contemptuous expressions as if asking why someone like me was there.815e8318097faa8e

If I couldn’t break Lee Gyeon’s stubbornness, I should go to someone who could.05aa715ffef3216a

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“I’ll speak directly with the esper center director.”fb7a3359c84e6aa1

❖ ❖ ❖a391e0e9f859bd8e

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Even though 33649cc99c I made 857f07f759 a grand 56f3b0e691 decision, there 3c4ed4e1da was no 5ca83ea3be way a 8383c9fe0f D-grade guide 862efe2ec4 could meet 78b648f16b the Esper c480761ac0 Center director 518fcd327a directly. Fortunately, I 3a8b3247db had someone 365b8431f0 I could e8329d7fbc rely on. Someone who could help 75f7f82be2 me.8fa23dea3a08a916

‘He should be 1ecfcbd2db running around this d36fcd2e1c time.’df654160a0094a01

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Sure enough, Dohun 2606af7dde sunbae was running 9abc194a29 at a steady 6460ca1adf pace at the 5f9f604eed end of the 9fd261cc3c track. He looked like d743cfce21 a fitness model, 8f03cda7c3 with his muscular d6ed7613de thighs standing out. Despite preferring outdoor 148ba0812e training, his skin b83583b026 was fair. This tough-looking 8dd0b25b95 man, often f1193cca87 mistaken for ebebbdcf9e an esper, 6602c11648 had eyes c01ce57ac4 as gentle 0271344a53 as a 9e5c360b26 puppy.f62fa04a5132a802

“Dohun sunbae!”8ce4d2ed3a90342a

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A-grade guide Sung Dohun. He was a senior who had been active as a guide long before me. The only person I could rely on at the guide center. That’s how I thought of him.80e614351926a722

“Haegyeol!”afee8a3718893cad

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Sunbae spotted me 2999ed80ff and waved his dccddf00d6 arm. His balanced 86017047df body wobbled 5b2c075233 slightly as 21b13101e2 he ran be7356b164 toward me. His short 15827e877b hair matched 0937dec787 his neat 3bf46fe544 personality.c7355081633560fb

It was already quite baafcaf512 hot in June. The sun shone without 6b3aaebfcb a shade, making me b5645396b0 a bit dizzy. Someone across the way 92ac4e8260 turned on a faucet. The creaking cae95dc679 sound and 8262371b16 the rushing 62ad7e03d2 water seemed 3c83387026 to connect 3e561e02bc like joints.10bcc8f3a75526bf

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“You’re not dressed for running?”7176b4b2ed4bfe2e

“I didn’t come to run.”3cfb9615516b2758

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“Then?”df33a274c193b436

“I came to see you, sunbae.”5b1d57a9d6bbb245

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“That’s a rare cheesy thing to say.”3719694c2188a427

Dohun sunbae took the drink from my hand. Every action was natural. He knew I brought the drink for him, didn’t refuse it, and didn’t bother to ask.9d0713c7e76bee0d

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Our relationship was fe4cde3a22 as smooth and e1e4000677 comfortable as flowing 58bb58112d water.3b43567892e74baf

“You’re not usually here at this time. Where have you been?”f6f844e1efb8cae7

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“Yeah. I got something absurd.”1b05bda88e19bcb5

I shook 36ce2be715 out the 7c88440e6e crumpled notice 5a08e32073 in my dca5b327b3 hand. Sunbae glanced behind me a9c35eb504 and opened the drink.4cbdf4509cbfa692

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“Want some?”a8bc548d2fcc1e5f

“Please take a look at this.”adb9a7795ac89dd1

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“Your sleeve is folded.”426b5447f95d997d

Sunbae took a ef9fd9f2e5 sip of the 79f5d0eead drink and straightened 146dae8da8 my folded sleeve.a21be72fc94b143b

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“Is it related to Lee Gyeon?”5055b8a7ee78625f

“I got a notice to become Lee Gyeon’s exclusive guide. This.”f660c5858225c30f

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“I knew it without looking.”a86892ff35ee82ef

Sunbae turned his head bbeac2c0e3 as if deliberately avoiding f79e79cee7 it. I crumpled b122645b11 the paper 3bfaefdcf5 back into 3ff292cc75 my pocket.e2f482f32190255d

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“How did you know?”b90703dbfdaa39f8

“I was supposed to have dinner with my uncle yesterday.”19533073187b65d5

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“Uncle?”69c5090786b14c7f

Ah. I understood from sunbae’s expression. The “uncle” he referred to was the “guide center director.” A high-ranking person I found hard to meet, yet sunbae casually called him uncle.b081e928637b9098

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“When he suddenly ran out of the restaurant, I guessed something happened. You know? The guide center director’s job is pretty cushy. If my uncle runs out, it’s always because of an esper, and that esper is usually…”7a93d90658876d5b

“Probably Lee Gyeon.”92b389ec9ead337b

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“Often the Esper Center director too.”d75b3d9cbfd78085

Sunbae’s expression seemed oddly cold. The blue drink swirled in the bottle.eb7a740d9c56943b

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“But this time, it was because of a guide I care about.”39151be25ffb15d9

“…”13b2720779e97af0

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“What happened?”a5607e0be65bc71f

It felt like an interrogation. I was puzzled. Sunbae had always supported me becoming Lee Gyeon’s guide.f5d858bf6dec1ca1

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Did he f801f0a8a2 think I 9fb6be2856 used Lee d6f144bb53 Gyeon to 103ebb802a get promoted?6f3d9aa95e6c4a4e

I had been struggling beside Lee Gyeon and hadn’t paid proper attention to Dohun sunbae. Maybe he felt uncomfortable with me becoming the guide for an S-grade esper.b871fb51c79f3881

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I didn’t want to get on Dohun sunbae’s bad side. My voice came out urgently, as if pleading for him to believe in my innocence.aaff703df4377f75

“I don’t know anything about it. I told you last time, I refused. I really did refuse. Suddenly, they say I’m Lee Gyeon’s exclusive guide, and I can’t understand the situation…”2861821e71d152e9

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“…”2c540b20292924b1

“It was probably something Lee Gyeon decided on his own.”fda4b25eaeca7abc

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“Really?”74bcb76107a8de5f

The response acf59b03cc felt oddly cdf84cb6dd lukewarm. Why?4a1ec84d487f3ec4

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“What’s wrong, sunbae? Is there something you don’t like?”bd4e2cf092d89710

Dohun sunbae hesitated, 4063e9da5c then shaded my c0b7d7b22c forehead with his b21d0c3260 hand. The cool edge 80d8de0dc8 of his hand c4e5b7d601 touched my hot 1f797febce forehead. I lowered 3dfe4fffc9 my gaze, dada0946b4 ruffling my aabe97e020 bangs. An ant was passing 85d57c93d9 under our feet, touching 4775baac9b the sole of my d0afbad9df shoe.9034be335889d2c1

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“I’m worried about you.”2322acf876ee9d20

I moved my foot 18a4b9c9c4 to avoid stepping on 45039a346d the ant.8172fae3f2df4126

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“Lee Gyeon’s known for giving guides a hard time since he was young. There’s a reason he doesn’t have a pair. He caused trouble yesterday too. Didn’t you get the message?”ba1efba460fe88b8

As soon as I heard “yesterday,” I remembered kissing Lee Gyeon. Heat surged to my chin. My lower abdomen tightened as if I’d been punched. The blood-soaked Lee Gyeon was more vividly handsome than I usually remembered.2551c1038a72b900

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“Oh, I think I got a message.”b9ffd5fc4cb2897d

Was I 731f96178c too awkward? I shrugged after pondering.ed80a9a032dd51e0

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“I was busy.”c9e291115fb6f687

“Really? That’s not what I heard. You had dinner with your guide colleagues.”17ae9e623ff03d15

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“…I went to the bathroom. My stomach hurt.”1123474197518fb7

Did it work? Though it was a ed649e323d clumsy lie, sunbae nodded 06e06e9f0a and let it slide.c846f08e61f6f330

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The explanation sunbae gave was a mix of things I didn’t know and things I remembered, tangled in different colors.581e41dff54b895a

Last night, after returning from a mission, Lee Gyeon had to receive guiding as per the upper management’s orders. He strongly refused, but it was only a matter of time before he rampaged. One of Lee Gyeon’s abilities, spatial disintegration, had started sporadically.b5ae024bba413310

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The guide urgently deployed 8642cdcfdb was A-grade, with a 1bfa21a8eb matching rate of about b81c992394 53% with Lee Gyeon. Given the c1f6c3961e situation, it 9d96cc8b95 was a 34a8dd925e decent option. While Lee Gyeon was db73d71928 receiving a mission report, c8ad01b2fa the guide grabbed his 3adc475033 hand. It was 7c0b678809 like a 1ad6ebc0fe pediatrician secretly 1fcfd38a14 giving a 7962792c0e shot to 7367e75533 a crying 9adb68d972 child.f1587ff0faaffe91

But as soon 1d903390a7 as he touched ca7487a1ec him, the rampage faced9fde1 occurred.302d745d5ce75012

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