EMP Chapter 17

“Is it okay to be this relaxed during the exam period? Even if it’s a break between semesters.”

“…”

Park Juyeon was astonished, wondering how many days it had been like this. Kim Suhyeon’s constant contact showed no signs of stopping. Although the conversations weren’t particularly special, that was precisely what bothered Park Juyeon more.

A while ago, when Kim Suhyeok noticed the disappearance of the message count in the chat window, he called Kwon Jiwook several times. However, the two, who were in the middle of having sex, ignored the calls and eventually even hung up on purpose. To be precise, Kwon Jiwook was preoccupied, so Park Juyeon ignored the calls one-sidedly.

Later, Kwon Jiwook remembered the missed calls but couldn’t bring himself to call back, and they ended up just exchanging occasional text messages.

“Hyung, was this Sunbae always this close to Hyung?”

“I don’t know.”

Kwon Jiwook quietly recalled his first meeting with Kim Suhyeok, prompted by Park Juyeon’s clearly annoyed remark. In truth, there was nothing special about it. They were just two freshmen who joined a club at the recommendation of an acquaintance, drank together, discovered they were from the same hometown, and maintained a one-sided, thin connection ever since.

Kwon Jiwook had never thought deeply about Kim Suhyeok. He had always seen him as just another guy who hung out with the popular crowd in high school, known as ‘iljin’¹and flattered them.

But perhaps Kim Suhyeok genuinely admired him. Despite the one-sided silence, he kept reaching out, which made Kwon Jiwook think so.

Kim Suhyeok’s occasional tough behavior was likely a result of imitating Kwon Jiwook. In reality, Kim Suhyeok’s reputation wasn’t bad. Although he was seen as boastful, most people thought he took good care of those around him. Unconsciously, Kim Suhyeok wanted to be like Kwon Jiwook and was conscious of him.

Admiration. The word had an unfamiliar and strange ring to it, affecting one’s mood peculiarly.

“Should I introduce you to him?”

“…”

Kwon Jiwook opened and closed his mouth a few times. He didn’t know what to say and found it hard to understand Park Juyeon’s intentions. Such words were usually said to test someone.

“I’m not joking, I’m serious.”

Park Juyeon’s dark eyes stared intently at Kwon Jiwook. Expressionless, Park Juyeon seemed like an unpredictable bomb, making it difficult to interact with him. It seemed like he was indeed testing him. Kwon Jiwook finally responded after a long pause.

“…Why?”

“Why? Because you both are too intense, it’s annoying. It might be better to meet face-to-face. Once you see each other, you might run out of things to say and never want to meet again.”

Kwon Jiwook’s mind was flooded with various thoughts. From ‘Did I use my phone so much that it became annoying?’ to ‘Is it bothering him that I’m always at home?’ Kwon Jiwook didn’t realize how much he was reacting to every word Park Juyeon said.

In fact, after coming out to the living room, Kwon Jiwook rarely felt extremely lonely, bored, or restless. Although the interference was strong, he could still use his phone, watch TV, and look outside. Time passed quickly, and he noticed the world outside the window had become sultry.

So, Kwon Jiwook had no reason to be obsessed with Kim Suhyeok. He tried to keep his contact minimal, considering Park Juyeon’s feelings, but even then, being called intense seemed strange. Kwon Jiwook couldn’t understand why Park Juyeon was making such a fuss.

Anyway, even if Park Juyeon had personal reasons for keeping him in a situation similar to confinement, it was true that Kwon Jiwook was doing nothing and living off Park Juyeon. A belated sense of guilt pricked at Kwon Jiwook. Park Juyeon’s words about being grateful for everything he did also played a part.

But if he accidentally said something about wanting to go outside or asking to be let out, who knows what kind of trouble it would cause. So, Kwon Jiwook decided to only respond to safe questions.

“If you introduce us, I’ll meet him.”

Park Juyeon’s dark eyes deepened even more. Kwon Jiwook added lukewarmly, realizing his mistake.

“…But I don’t really want to go out.”

“Is that so?”

It wasn’t like they were exchanging intense messages. Kwon Jiwook thought this level of contact was enough to check on each other. Some might call this a passive life, but once you get used to it, it’s not so bad.

Just two weeks ago, Kwon Jiwook had nothing, but now he at least had clothes on and looked somewhat human. He sat on the sofa with his knees up. Park Juyeon, sitting at the far end, casually tossed the phone between them. It’s not mine anymore; it’s his.

“So, reply to him.”

“Why should I reply all of a sudden…”

“He said he wants to meet soon since the semester is ending. So I asked you. You can reply that you don’t really want to go out.”

Kwon Jiwook grunted and reached for the phone. He checked the chat to make sure Park Juyeon hadn’t sent anything weird. Soon, Kwon Jiwook replied obediently. Even if Park Juyeon told him to, it was still his own words.

Not long after, the phone suddenly rang. Startled, Kwon Jiwook froze, holding the phone tightly and just looking at Park Juyeon. Park Juyeon tilted his head, finding the reaction strange.

“Why aren’t you answering?”

“Can I answer it?”

“Put it on speaker.”

He had said something like that before—if you’re going to talk, make sure I can hear it. But Kwon Jiwook hesitated to answer. What kind of conversation could two guys have? And why was Kim Suhyeok calling again if he wasn’t going to meet him? It felt burdensome.

“It’s going to hang up soon. Answer quickly. I’m curious what that Sunbae will say.”

“…”

Honestly, Kwon Jiwook hoped it would hang up. Every time he shared Kim Suhyeok’s messages and missed call records with Park Juyeon, he felt burdened, as if he had to choose between the two.

Who did he think he was to have such thoughts? It was ridiculous. No one had given Kwon Jiwook the right to choose.

So, rather than feeling this burden, it would be easier if Kim Suhyeok stopped contacting him first. But here he was, calling again as if his life depended on it. The phone rang persistently, as if he wouldn’t be able to contact Kwon Jiwook ever again if he didn’t answer now.

“What did you send him to make him so persistent?”

“I sent exactly what you told me to. That I don’t really want to go out. And you told me to send it.”

Park Juyeon rested his chin on his hand, watching Kwon Jiwook intently, or rather, his hand holding the phone.

Those beautiful yet chilling eyes never got easier to face, no matter how many days passed. Kwon Jiwook swallowed dryly and gripped the phone tightly. But Park Juyeon naturally moved closer to him, swiftly took the phone, and answered the call. Kwon Jiwook missed his chance to react.

“Hey…!”

“Shh.”

Park Juyeon switched the call to speakerphone. Kwon Jiwook was too shocked to speak anyway.

— …

The other person seemed surprised that Kwon Jiwook actually answered. After a long pause, Kim Suhyeok finally spoke.

— Kwon Jiwook!?

The unfamiliar voice echoed through the large living room, making Kwon Jiwook feel awkward.

“…What.”

— You fucker, you should answer when I call! Why didn’t you answer? What were you doing? Are you okay?!

“Did you call before?”

— Yes! I’ve been calling for days, but it kept getting cut off, so I thought this guy was hanging up on me on purpose, and I was so…!

Suddenly, Kwon Jiwook’s eyes met Park Juyeon’s, who was looking at the phone with interest. ‘Why?’ Kwon Jiwook’s gaze seemed to ask. He quietly lowered his eyes. If the phone had rung, he wished Park Juyeon would have at least mentioned it. After all, the call was for him. But he swallowed his words. He didn’t expect an answer, and he didn’t want to let Kim Suhyeok know that he was with Park Juyeon.

— Seriously…! Oh, sorry. I was just so happy to hear from you…

Kim Suhyeok didn’t seem quite right either, probably because they hadn’t seen each other in a while. He was rambling on his own.

“Why are you suddenly apologizing?”

— …

The other end of the phone went silent. Kwon Jiwook worried he might have said something wrong again and shut his mouth, looking confused. Park Juyeon fiddled with the phone, not doing anything meaningful. Instead, he listened more intently to the conversation.

— Aren’t you mad?

“Why would I be mad at you?”

— Usually, if I raise my voice even a little, you get really…Why aren’t you swearing? Why are you so calm? Something’s definitely wrong!

“…I’ve been feeling down lately. What more do you want me to say?”

This was a change Kwon Jiwook had vaguely noticed as well.

Lately, he felt listless for no reason, and his tone was unusually subdued. He often lay on the sofa, finding it hard to even move to take a shower. Even when Park Juyeon asked if he was feeling unwell, Kwon Jiwook couldn’t give a proper answer.

He thought this lifestyle wasn’t so bad. He felt indifferent about it. Besides, his lethargy disappeared when he was intimate with Park Juyeon, making him feel like a different person, so he couldn’t find a reason for it.

But if a third party could notice it, it didn’t feel good.

— Anyway, you’re not sick or anything, right? If something’s wrong, tell me right away.

“Ha.”

Park Juyeon, who had been listening quietly, let out a barely audible laugh. What was Kim Suhyeok going to do if Kwon Jiwook was sick? That was Park Juyeon’s responsibility. Even if Kwon Jiwook was really sick, Park Juyeon would decide on the treatment. Kwon Jiwook seemed to think the same and laughed emptily.

“What…Since when did you care about me so much?”

— Hey, why are you saying that like it hurts? Huh?

Kwon Jiwook found Kim Suhyeok’s stammering amusing and laughed heartily. It had been so long since he laughed that his facial muscles felt awkward. Noticing Kwon Jiwook’s mood had lightened, Park Juyeon slightly furrowed his brow. Was Kwon Jiwook the kind of person who would laugh at such trivial things?

“It’s funny. You’re worse than when I was in the military.”

— It’s not that bad…Do you hate it?

“No. It’s not bad.”

— Really? Hehe.

When Kwon Jiwook was with Park Juyeon, he wasn’t supposed to have anything to laugh about, but seeing such a genuine reaction made Park Juyeon feel strangely unpleasant.

More importantly, he thought they were just close, but it turned out they were incredibly close. Park Juyeon realized he was frowning as he looked at Kwon Jiwook’s face, which was brighter than usual. This was all because Kwon Jiwook was acting out of character.

Unless Park Juyeon said something, Kwon Jiwook wouldn’t know what he was thinking. With his mind half on Kim Suhyeok, Kwon Jiwook started to focus more on the call than on the person in front of him.

“But why did you call?”

— Oh, right. Hey! You didn’t even show up at school, and now you’re ignoring me when I want to see you before the semester ends?!

“Well…”

It’s burdensome. That was the only reason. What if meeting him caused some trouble? Another reason was that Park Juyeon might not actually allow him to meet Kim Suhyeok. He usually kept his promises, though.

“I just…don’t have the energy lately. I don’t feel like going out.”

— Are you really okay? Nothing’s wrong?

“…”

— Why aren’t you answering? You’re making me worried.

Park Juyeon glanced at Kwon Jiwook. He was staring blankly at his phone with the screen off before finally responding.

“Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine.”

It’s not that nothing happened; it’s that nothing mattered anymore. Kwon Jiwook laughed meaninglessly.

— Are you going to drink? Even if you don’t come?

“I said I’m not going.”

— There are a lot of people who want to see you. Besides, we have to spend all the club fees and support money before the semester ends. Just come and freeload. Okay?

Kim Suhyeok’s attitude became a bit urgent. Kwon Jiwook let out a small sigh. Even if he wanted to believe Kim Suhyeok’s words, most of the people who wanted to see Kwon Jiwook had been purged from his contacts by Park Juyeon. He hadn’t replied to them, and they had all been deleted, so he didn’t even remember who they were.

…But still. Even though he had firmly decided not to go, hearing a familiar voice and pleading after so long made his resolve waver. Maybe talking to people would ease his recent poor condition.

“…”

— Jiwook, you’re not coming?

This was a presumptuous thought. How important could his own condition be? Park Juyeon didn’t seem to care much about Kwon Jiwook’s physical state, judging by his consistent behavior.

Anyway, Park Juyeon was the one who first suggested letting him go out, and Kwon Jiwook was the one who refused. Kwon Jiwook knew that changing his mind would be annoying, so he was afraid to bring it up again.

“…Never mind. And I haven’t drunk in a while, so it won’t go down well.”

— That’s fucking weird….Well, okay. Let me know if you change your mind.

Unfortunately, there was no chance Kwon Jiwook would contact him first.

As the conversation was about to end, Kim Suhyeok, who seemed restless, urgently called out to Kwon Jiwook.

— Hey, hey! Jiwook!

“What?”

— Where are you? Who are you with?

Kwon Jiwook blinked. The sudden question was puzzling, and his serious tone was irritating.

“I’m at home….No one’s here.”

— Really?…Okay. Got it. Call me back if I call again, okay?!

Why does he keep talking like he knows something? In an instant, a deep-seated irritation surged, and Kwon Jiwook growled in anger.

“Who do you think you are, giving orders?”

— …Oh.

The frightened voice was heard briefly, and then the call abruptly ended. The large house, which had been lively with just two voices, was suddenly enveloped in silence.

“…”

“…”

Following this, Kwon Jiwook was greeted by a quiet, awkward, and distant atmosphere. Why did the mood become like this? Perhaps he had foreseen this situation when he hoped the ringing would stop on its own.

His chest felt tight. Kim Suhyeok wanted to see him this much. Someone who he thought would never care about him in his life was calling to ask about his well-being. Seeing him do something unusual made Kwon Jiwook want to see his face again after so long.

“The call…ended. What should I do?”

“Hyung.”

“Yeah.”

Park Juyeon was not in a good mood. He didn’t like Kim Suhyeok, who kept shaking Kwon Jiwook. It was different from before when he just found him annoying. Now, his feelings about Kim Suhyeok were clear. Park Juyeon disliked him.

If Kwon Jiwook stayed quiet like this, how good would that be? If Kim Suhyeok stopped causing ripples in Kwon Jiwook’s inner world, how good would that be?

“What are you thinking about right now?”

“…Nothing in particular…”

“How did the voice sound?”

“…”

I don’t know. It feels welcoming, somehow. He couldn’t express his vague feelings in words. Kwon Jiwook, who hadn’t been using his brain much, found it hard to come up with a clear answer.

“Earlier, you said you didn’t want to go out.”

“I didn’t say I didn’t want to.”

“Is that so?”

Kwon Jiwook was the kind of person who, once he wanted something, would unconsciously engage in small acts of rebellion. He would become noticeably more sullen than usual. Park Juyeon didn’t like hitting people over minor things like hesitating; it didn’t suit his temperament.

Actually, thinking about it, seeing Kwon Jiwook looking depressed made Park Juyeon feel frustrated. Despite suppressing Kwon Jiwook’s basic freedom, Park Juyeon remained shameless.

“I’ll ask you one last time. Answer clearly. No take-backs.”

“…”

“Should I let you meet Suhyeok Sunbae?”

“Huh?”

Kwon Jiwook blinked, looking dazed.

Park Juyeon could embarrass Kwon Jiwook in front of others and control him as he pleased. Unexpected things could happen in places that weren’t Park Juyeon’s territory. For example, encountering unwanted people.

Despite this, Kwon Jiwook nodded eagerly at Park Juyeon’s words. He was grateful that Park Juyeon had brought up the difficult topic first. Kwon Jiwook immediately sent a positive response to Kim Suhyeok. After that, things moved quickly.

Kim Suhyeok suggested meeting that Friday evening at a bar in a back alley of the city. The place was large enough to replace the bustling university street. Hearing this, Park Juyeon showed a somewhat vague reaction but nodded. When Kwon Jiwook asked why, Park Juyeon brushed it off, indicating it wasn’t important.

However, Kwon Jiwook’s mind was not as calm as he thought it would be.

“Aren’t you happy? You’re going out for the first time in two months. You can even drink.”

“I am happy.”

“You don’t look happy.”

No, I really am. It’s just that Kwon Jiwook didn’t know what expression to make when Park Juyeon and Kim Suhyeok met. Even if he felt listless, he couldn’t show his true situation to Kim Suhyeok. He just hoped Park Juyeon wouldn’t say anything unnecessary.

“Looking at you now, your hair has grown quite long. You need a haircut.”

“…”

Park Juyeon, who had been gently brushing Kwon Jiwook’s bangs, carefully examined his clothes. Kwon Jiwook felt self-conscious under that gaze and awkwardly rubbed his arm.

Even if it was okay at home, wearing a sleeveless shirt for going out made the fading bruises stand out. The bluish marks were noticeable, but fortunately, they didn’t look like serious injuries.

“Hmm…I was thinking of putting a choker on you since your neck is so ugly. But I don’t have one. Too bad.”

“It’s fine…”

“You need to wear something to remind you of your situation and not think about running away.”

“…”

At this point, it seemed like Park Juyeon was deliberately saying these things to be heard. Kwon Jiwook was already worried about meeting Kim Suhyeok, and hearing Park Juyeon’s harsh words made his stomach churn. He sighed.

“Even without that…I won’t run away. I can’t. I’ve never even thought about it.”

“You can’t?”

“You’ll come and catch me right away.”

Park Juyeon burst out laughing. Kwon Jiwook felt embarrassed and showed his displeasure.

But for Park Juyeon, it was a laughable statement. He wasn’t seriously worried about Kwon Jiwook escaping. He was confident he could catch him. In fact, he had chased Kwon Jiwook for the past few years, and the result was this situation. Hearing Kwon Jiwook try to reassure him was amusing.

Every time Kwon Jiwook said something unexpectedly cute, a smile would creep onto Park Juyeon’s face.

“That’s right. I’ll come and catch you right away, so don’t even think about it.”

Or I’ll really kill you. Park Juyeon’s eyes sparkled with a mix of warmth and threat. Kwon Jiwook, who had been quietly enduring Park Juyeon’s touch, forced a smile.

* * *

“…It’s hot.”

“It’s better now that it’s evening. It’s been so hot lately.”

It wasn’t the weather; it was Park Juyeon’s hand that was hot.

Park Juyeon was holding Kwon Jiwook’s hand tightly. The crowded alley on a Friday night seemed to be buzzing about them. Kwon Jiwook tried to suppress his urge to shrink away, but he couldn’t hide his blushing face.

Kwon Jiwook thought he had grown accustomed to physical intimacy, whether it was sex or anything else. However, he realized that this was all an illusion. He felt the private world he had built with Park Juyeon crumbling. In the past, he was not the kind of person who would engage in such acts in front of others, especially in a crowded place.

As they walked towards the bar, Park Juyeon gradually wrapped his arm around Kwon Jiwook’s shoulder. Kwon Jiwook, conscious of the people around them, eventually shrank away, causing Park Juyeon to click his tongue in disapproval.

“Keep doing that and I’ll have sex with you right here.”

“What did I do to deserve that?”

“Oh, look, there’s a perfect spot for sex right there.”

Park Juyeon pointed to a dark, narrow alley between buildings.

“It’s dark, so it won’t be too noticeable. It would be amazing to fuck you while people walk by.”

“…”

“We could do it standing up or bent over. Oh, right. You’ve gotten really good at coming lately. If you piss yourself, people might gather around wondering what’s going on. Someone you know might even see you.”

“…I’m sorry. I get it. I won’t do it again. I’ll stay still.”

“Then everyone will know. Kwon Jiwook, the guy who loves outdoor play and has a loose asshole.”

A passerby glanced at them with a shocked expression. Kwon Jiwook’s heart raced, and he gritted his teeth. Park Juyeon, watching Kwon Jiwook’s reaction, struggled to hold back laughter.

“Should I stop?”

“…”

“Alright. You look like you’re about to cry.”

Kwon Jiwook nodded, his face clouded. He couldn’t say anything. He was afraid. He knew Park Juyeon was capable of doing such things. On the other hand, Park Juyeon found it amusing. He had felt Kwon Jiwook’s reactions were dull lately, but seeing this, he realized Kwon Jiwook wasn’t entirely dead inside. The fresh reaction was satisfying.

The reserved bar was always bustling with people, even though it was tucked away in a back alley. Kwon Jiwook wondered why Kim Suhyeok had chosen this place. He didn’t know that Kim Suhyeok had been avoiding crowded places lately.

Kwon Jiwook thought seeing familiar faces would make him feel better. He believed Park Juyeon wouldn’t bother him in public, so he hadn’t anticipated this kind of discomfort. Park Juyeon’s hand, which had been touching Kwon Jiwook the whole time, finally let go as they entered the bar. This was a small comfort to Kwon Jiwook.

“Haah…”

Kwon Jiwook looked around with a tired expression. The place was already noisy, even though it didn’t seem like everyone had arrived yet. A few familiar faces nodded at him, but Kwon Jiwook didn’t acknowledge them. It wasn’t that he disliked them; it was just a habit.

Kim Suhyeok was sitting in the middle of a group, chatting. If Park Juyeon hadn’t been by his side, Kwon Jiwook would have joined the conversation naturally.

Kim Suhyeok’s face hadn’t changed much. After all, two months could feel both long and short. Kim Suhyeok, who had been chattering, felt a gaze on him and looked up. His eyes widened like a rabbit’s.

“Kwon Jiwook!”

He looked as if he had seen someone he hadn’t expected to see, a mix of surprise and joy on his face as he stood up abruptly, pushing the table.

The loud noise drew everyone’s attention for a moment. Kwon Jiwook felt embarrassed. Kim Suhyeok, struggling to get out from the middle of the group, finally made his way to Kwon Jiwook. The others awkwardly moved aside to let him pass.

“Wow, fuck. You’re alive…”

Kim Suhyeok’s gaze naturally shifted to the side, and he suddenly paled. He looked like he had seen a ghost….Then Kwon Jiwook remembered that Park Juyeon was standing next to him.

No matter how pale Park Juyeon was, Kim Suhyeok’s reaction was strange. Kwon Jiwook tapped Kim Suhyeok’s shoulder.

“What’s wrong with you? Did something happen between you two?”

“N-n-no! L-let’s sit down first. Yeah…”

Kim Suhyeok looked around nervously. Park Juyeon didn’t take his eyes off Kim Suhyeok, who was desperately avoiding him. Kwon Jiwook took the opportunity to grumble.

“Why did you choose this place? Why not somewhere near the school?”

“We took a vote, and more people said they would come here. But there’s no space near the school. You…let’s see…”

“It’s the end of the semester, but these kids don’t go home?”

Kwon Jiwook habitually muttered a curse and then nervously checked Park Juyeon’s reaction, but there was none. Kim Suhyeok, oblivious to the situation, mumbled as he moved to another seat.

“But who is this guy? Why did he come, ugh…”

“Me? I voted in the group chat. I said I was coming.”

Park Juyeon had sharp ears. He overheard Kim Suhyeok’s muttering and approached him with a smirk. Kim Suhyeok looked up at Park Juyeon with wide eyes, then quickly grabbed Kwon Jiwook’s wrist and led him to a corner seat. He then sat down next to Kwon Jiwook, positioning him close to the wall and blocking the outer passage himself.

Park Juyeon stared at Kim Suhyeok in disbelief. Where did this little fox learn such petty tricks?

Just as Park Juyeon was about to say something, someone from his class, who called him by the strange nickname ‘Park Hatnim,’ approached and grabbed his attention. Park Juyeon smiled a few times, living up to his odd nickname, then reluctantly turned to Kwon Jiwook.

“I’ll go have a drink. Don’t cause any trouble and stay quiet.”

“Got it.”

“If you’re going somewhere, tell me first. Don’t just leave.”

“I said I got it.”

“…”

“…Sorry.”

Kwon Jiwook murmured, covering his mouth. The cold gaze made his spine tingle. How could someone change their expression so quickly if they weren’t bipolar?

Kwon Jiwook deliberately cleared his throat a couple of times, and Park Juyeon narrowed his eyes. After that, he left without another word, joining his classmates. As soon as Park Juyeon disappeared, Kim Suhyeok let out a sigh of relief.

“Ha, that guy makes me so nervous…Fuck!”

“Who? Park Juyeon?”

“Yeah!”

Kim Suhyeok was eager to drink, even though no food had been ordered yet. At first, Kwon Jiwook just tapped the table awkwardly, but he couldn’t stand Kim Suhyeok’s restlessness any longer and snapped.

“Shut up! You’re being so loud, fuck.”

“S-sorry.”

“Have you been sucking up to Park Juyeon since you haven’t seen him in a while? Are you following him around now? Why are you worried about him in front of me?”

Honestly, Kwon Jiwook felt a bit guilty. Who was he to say such things?

Still, with Park Juyeon far away, he ordered some food in a huff. Kim Suhyeok, realizing his mistake, quickly ordered food for the other tables as well. Finally, the table quieted down.

“Well, it looks like…nothing bad happened. You seem okay.”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing. Never mind.”

The following silence wasn’t too awkward. It was hard for a years-long friendship to grow distant in just two months, even with everything that had happened.

Just as Kwon Jiwook was starting to miss his confiscated phone, the food arrived at the table. Kim Suhyeok led a cheerful toast to his club members, and the real gathering began. As usual, people gathered with their close friends, talking among themselves.

Park Juyeon was also dragged into a department gathering and was seated far away. At the table farthest from Kwon Jiwook, a group of burly men were drinking and chatting.

“That side is full of shady guys.”

“Who are you looking at?”

“Thugs.”

No matter how much they tried to pass as civilians, they looked more like gangsters than students. Kwon Jiwook clicked his tongue and drank his beer. The other young men also avoided that group, confirming they were not to be messed with.

“Why are they ruining the mood by drinking here? It’s so annoying.”

“Hmm…Let’s just drink our beer.”

True to his cautious nature, Kim Suhyeok followed Kwon Jiwook’s gaze but quickly looked away when he saw the tough-looking group.

Kwon Jiwook’s eyes drifted to Park Juyeon. Despite his chaotic personality, Park Juyeon had a strikingly handsome face. Those thugs wouldn’t hesitate to pick a fight with civilians, and Kwon Jiwook worried that Park Juyeon might get into trouble.

But then again, Park Juyeon was good with his fists too…Following his train of thought, Kwon Jiwook became confused about who he was worried for.

“…?”

But then, Kwon Jiwook noticed that Park Juyeon was talking to someone from the tough-looking group. He took a sip of his beer and tried to get a better look, but the crowded bar obscured his view. He couldn’t just shout at everyone to move. Kwon Jiwook squinted and stretched his neck, but all he could see was the back of the person’s head.

The conversation was brief. Kwon Jiwook pretended not to notice as Park Juyeon quickly returned to his seat. Park Juyeon might interfere in Kwon Jiwook’s relationships, but Kwon Jiwook didn’t need to know about Park Juyeon’s. He suppressed his growing curiosity. He could ask about it later when they got home.

More importantly, Kwon Jiwook needed to focus on his drinking companion, who was starting to warm up.

“Kim Suhyeok, are you crazy?”

“I haven’t even started yet…”

Kim Suhyeok usually got drunk quickly, but today he was on another level.

Normally, he enjoyed drinking while chatting and building friendships. But today, he was quietly drinking, and after just a few glasses, he was already showing signs of intoxication.

Damn it. I haven’t even had a drink yet, and this guy has already downed a bottle and a half of soju. Kwon Jiwook’s mood was ruined. He couldn’t bring himself to make Kim Suhyeok take responsibility, so he just picked at the clear soup in front of him.

Kim Suhyeok, who had been downing drinks, suddenly spoke in a choked voice.

“So, you’ve been hanging out with Park Juyeon lately.”

“Yeah, that’s how it is.”

“And you haven’t been in touch.”

“…That just happened.”

Talking about Park Juyeon made Kwon Jiwook feel bitter. His mouth felt dry. He had thought his recent lifestyle was okay, but being in this lively setting made him feel like he was finally living his life again.

Or maybe it was just a summer dream. A dream that would end when Park Juyeon got tired of this atmosphere. It felt so unreal.

Kwon Jiwook tapped the glass mixed with soju and beer, then downed it in one gulp. Kim Suhyeok, watching him with a flushed face and chin propped up, asked,

“What have you been doing?”

“Nothing much.”

“I haven’t heard anything about you.”

“I’ve been quiet.”

Quiet.

Kim Suhyeok nodded slightly, lowering his gaze. Kwon Jiwook didn’t seem to make any effort to hide it. Was he aware or not? Or did he think the dim lighting would conceal it? Under the short sleeves, mysterious scars were visible on his firm arms.

How did someone who doesn’t get into fights end up with these marks? It was ridiculous, but Kim Suhyeok couldn’t bring himself to say anything.

Even in his drunken state, Kim Suhyeok looked around for Park Juyeon. Seeing him far away at another table with the club, Kim Suhyeok finally slumped onto the table.

“Jiwook…”

“What’s wrong with this guy?”

Kim Suhyeok’s mind was a mess, his brain felt like a crumpled piece of paper. Should he report this now? But even if he did…Kwon Jiwook hadn’t shown any signs to Kim Suhyeok. This made him feel even more guilty, his chest tightening painfully.

Moments of seemingly peaceful daily life would suddenly be interrupted by memories of a photo. Seeing the person from the photo in front of him made it hard to look at him. The person in front of him and the lewd figure in the photo overlapped, making him want to drown his senses in alcohol and forget everything.

As Kim Suhyeok lay there silently, Kwon Jiwook leaned in to look at his face.

“Kim Suhyeok.”

“Huh?”

“You don’t seem okay either.”

“Me…?”

“Are you feeling sick?”

Drinking so much at once can make you sick. Kwon Jiwook clicked his tongue. Kim Suhyeok blinked. Kwon Jiwook caring about someone else’s health? It was touching but also felt strange. People don’t change easily, especially someone like Kwon Jiwook.

Clearly, something had happened between Kwon Jiwook and Park Juyeon. Their arrival together was suspicious, and Kwon Jiwook’s constant glances at Park Juyeon were odd. Kim Suhyeok wanted to ask directly, “Did Park Juyeon do something to you?”

…But how could he bring it up? What right did he have to ask?

Kim Suhyeok felt responsible for everything that had happened. After receiving the photo that day and being blackmailed into drinking with those people, he sent the photo to them. A whole month had passed. If he had given Kwon Jiwook even a hint, they might have had a hard time facing each other, but at least Kwon Jiwook wouldn’t have ended up in such a terrible state. At least he wouldn’t have been caught off guard like that. Emotions surged with the alcohol, and his eyes welled up with tears.

“I-I’m sorry…”

“For what?”

“I’m just sorry, really sorry…”

“…Hey. What’s going on? Hey, Kim Suhyeok. Are you crying? Wait…”

Kim Suhyeok’s lips trembled as he sniffled. Kwon Jiwook was confused. Since when did this guy start crying when he drank?

When one person’s mood turns sour, it can affect the entire gathering. Kwon Jiwook switched seats, pushing Kim Suhyeok to the inner side and blocking the view from others with his body. He then leaned in close and quietly said,

“Why are you suddenly acting like this? Have you really lost it?”

“Hic, hic…sob…”

“You never used to be like this. Why are you suddenly acting so weird…”

“Jiwookaaaa…”

Kwon Jiwook roughly brushed back his grown-out bangs. The way he had Kim Suhyeok cornered could easily be misinterpreted. Kwon Jiwook tried to act nonchalant, fiddling with his glass as he muttered,

“Hey, stop crying. People will think I’m fucking robbing you or something.”

“Now you’re acting like our Jiwook again…”

“What…Are you seriously crazy?”

Only Kim Suhyeok would be happy to hear harsh words and cry.

Kim Suhyeok’s tears were subsiding, but a few people nearby noticed the commotion and glanced over. Even Park Juyeon, seated far away, noticed.

As Kwon Jiwook patted Kim Suhyeok’s shoulder, he happened to turn his head and met Park Juyeon’s gaze. Park Juyeon stared at Kwon Jiwook for a moment before getting up from his seat. Ever polite, he smiled and said goodbye to his classmates before leaving. Kwon Jiwook’s expression became uncertain.

Park Juyeon weaved through the crowded tables and sat down across from Kwon Jiwook. Kwon Jiwook’s hand, which had been on Kim Suhyeok’s shoulder, trembled.

“People said those guys were acting weird, so I came to check.”

“…”

“Don’t get so close to that Sunbae. Your posture can easily be misinterpreted. People were whispering, so I got curious and came over.”

“Does it look bad?”

“It’s not that I mind, but…Don’t you hate it, Hyung? Seeing two men being intimate in public. That’s how it looks.”

At those words, Kwon Jiwook slowly withdrew his hand. Kim Suhyeok reached for the alcohol again, but Kwon Jiwook quickly switched the alcohol glass with a water glass.

He was already exhausted. Kwon Jiwook leaned back against the wall and tilted his head back. Seizing the moment, Kim Suhyeok downed a shot of soju and pressed his forehead. Kwon Jiwook watched him with lowered eyes. Now, he was almost looking forward to Kim Suhyeok’s next move.

“Juyeon,” Kim Suhyeok called out to Park Juyeon in a tearful voice.

“Have you been with Kwon Jiwook all this time?”

“I don’t know what you mean…”

Park Juyeon, with his arms crossed, smiled lightly and shrugged.

“How did you two end up together like that? Seeing you two, I thought my heart would stop.”

“We just happened to meet in front of the school.”

“Were you two always that close? I thought you weren’t.”

“We grew closer over time. By the way, you seem too interested. Is it interest in me, or…in Jiwook Hyung?”

Kwon Jiwook tried to ignore their conversation. The seriousness of their exchange was unfamiliar and strange to him.

Kwon Jiwook wanted to ask, “When did you two get so close?” Or maybe their relationship had soured. Kwon Jiwook bit his lip to keep from saying anything and focused on drinking his somaek (a mix of soju and beer).

After emptying his glass and trying to lower his head, Kwon Jiwook suddenly stopped and widened his eyes, spotting a familiar face among the group of men.

Ah. Did I see that wrong?

“…”

Thump, thump. His heart started pounding fiercely.