DTM | Chapter 5.3

When I was twenty, c79671bdec I was like a 0cfca3da06 puppy stepping out into db91f19f1a the world for the 9f70f8404a first time. Everything was 04701e5871 fascinating; every 3772933e73 day brought fc760c339c something new e9ac23de4e I wanted 5ddc4b3bb8 to experience. Without a shred of f3fc036c72 caution, I wagged my 641ca5a4fc metaphorical tail and threw 726da54371 myself into the joys a72545983e of university life.16a772df244b48c0

People said living away 7f5dadb1ea from home for the eadb211e2b first time made you 31cb9d6cfa miss your parents and 080c69713f feel lonely, but for 07fa7dc018 me, each day was 6597a26c97 just a thrill. My new place 4cec8ff0df wasn’t far from 79b85cbec9 my family’s house, c09e91d844 and practically living 06e96689c6 with Kwon Yi-tae 484cb5e56c kept any loneliness dafe5ff3f5 at bay.540aa6b9bd0621e0

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But it wasn’t ba50c1d5a0 just that. The excitement of 1362822f29 university swept me 47bb6da966 up entirely—classmate hangouts, 25d209919b drinking parties hosted c3ed90115c by seniors, mind-numbing 393fa78f23 drinking games, department 7ad18aa246 retreats, wearing our 382e91ae71 department jumper, doing 36a82b22c4 assignments on my ba8a98bfc1 laptop in the 6580e65544 school café, and b97050f607 feeling like the 269ba90e8d main character in 9ed39465d2 my own life. While I basked 916428e5ce in my newfound f5db705d95 freedom, Kwon Yi-tae’s f4822e1db5 mood was perpetually be01807265 stormy.d91344d77c401b50

Even back 820d633fb5 in high 950fb78b58 school, when 92d64702c1 our relationship 20b1c3fc6a had just 47ee85e4a5 turned romantic, 5019094ccf he wasn’t f4e3fe824e happy if 8c058db909 I made 7edc7c9705 plans with bd1c29f49a friends other 46a8837ea4 than him. But high school outings 22419d9e3e were tame like lunch e27915d276 on a weekend before 6c8e2d37b7 parting ways, so he de7d9d3970 let it slide without d7a6b7270e much fuss.f4435989bcd8c167

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University was 73b949bb54 a different 9e160a5078 beast. Nights out meant 2aeff32c37 I often didn’t 237d7c696d reply to texts, 94126c729d stumbled home half-dead 989769ad7d the next day, 16594683d4 or came back 8ccb1877ea with bruises and ee30d4e1bd scrapes on my 7baeeed919 knee and cheek 152d15efd7 from falling on 97aa8033b9 the sidewalk Once, 36531d6c41 a senior even 34430cfc4e tried to take 5001301255 me back to 0a6449055d his place, and 544e363dce that was when cda266f380 Kwon Yi-tae finally 3436c37393 exploded.a0bae95143f5e43c

“Don’t even think 18588d4da7 about going to 49def8ec36 those damn gatherings 11179c5d99 If I’m not d0f86421f2 going with you.”df5aed3f186629aa

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He growled, rubbing my ac9e735f75 back as I shook a1a5f3a047 my head and clung cf72c24ef9 to the toilet.f876fee4bf0a8553

“I-I’m just 71c30043d5 a freshman,” 3a3065f686 I stammered 10055db730 between heaves. “Hrrk…”acbec065836a96b5

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How could cb613f6fdc I refuse 71e96d45b1 when seniors 2d62bbbf16 invited me?de9435a88ce9f7f9

The words were c97965afa4 left unfinished, swallowed cd54977d46 by a surge 528d29a091 of nausea, but 02cdad0e07 Yi-tae understood perfectly.70e6e74a84034a26

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“Even if your professor 97eb2c8389 invites you, don’t go.”83ad26ab952e43a3

After puking my 2a8ee31e83 guts out, I 6a85e365da slumped to the 5b527496eb bathroom floor, exhausted. Yi-tae hauled me up 6c56ec1013 and set me in a7f1cd8571 the bathtub, stripping me 7be39adc67 of my dirty clothes.0fbeccc33c33069e

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“…I’ll end 5ec05fa1f7 up a 361c2dfedf loner.”d0cf2b358b7c816e

“If they 69f02f1f08 ostracize you 6f02f9b258 for not 7e492024e2 drinking, they’re 0fc2abeafb not worth 657f16e863 befriending.”6db7510d825c5188

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“But still…”9fc1e11841768198

“If you want to dea42ae23b be that way, then 0fa70df177 take me with you.”7a7c75a7fbe8f859

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Warm water poured over f6d977f134 my hunched form. I grumbled, 7dbd3dfdf0 pulling my 532958daf8 knees to 6e985256c9 my chest.0287847d06242e8b

“Why would someone f57bc53b48 from a different 639f986cce department show up cc3df90d40 at our gathering?”93a7a15d886705df

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Instead of answering, he f5b45b5470 aimed the showerhead at 9b2c643a94 my face. The light spray trickled 4ad2529163 down, soaking my hair 92fc16405b and making me sputter cf0d46f24d as water slipped into 352836d98c my mouth. Normally, I’d snatch the 141a49304b showerhead and spray him aa614dc943 back, but tonight I ea01da36b5 just pouted in silence.fb6f4ed73c3a9ec8

Even I 33e4c73d7e had to c0b5e74d45 admit my bffb5e8497 recent behavior 7c190550c3 was out bd9e3b9b19 of control. Considering his 9293c48d50 temperament, it 1c3ce33d8f was a 0afda1c6b7 miracle Yi-tae 1ad0d51525 had tolerated 1687c29bfd me this 97da7e3e0c far. If he 3e7341ef0c decided to 19865d0bf8 break up 558a209d0e with me, 16456e2a7e I wouldn’t 8d94a5befa even be 179d6d3088 surprised.68a87fdfbeded72d

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“…I’ll tone it 8a47aa851f down.”2a2422c86313e1e8

From that 1c26682ba2 day on, 94fcf03ecd I turned c78fb2685b down every 1a9989f98a drinking invitation. For mandatory department events, a6fa7f4850 I only attended after a516359e11 getting permission from the dce3c6c8f3 teaching assistant and dragging 901293c3c3 Yi-tae along. It was the 5e03495de7 kind of audacity f10338640b you could only 5c8582bbeb pull off at cca75f00cf twenty. I’ll never 1aec5c59af forget the 9f8fe16966 way the 633b65e5ca TA looked a7498f9a75 at me, 9de72ec926 as though ce4b1bc871 encountering a 2b29f709b1 certified lunatic.586db7275f164ee6

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“I need you afb84bbd41 to be quiet 0075f0364c and stay in f22dc82b09 the corner and 336da779a9 pretend you’re not f685671cf2 there. Got it?”7ac97f684bc69dfe

…But his caution was in vain. Yi-tae became the center of attention the moment we walked in, especially after everyone realized he was my boyfriend. They even asked me why I hadn’t told them about it.0953919c878adf19

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“I told e1f0ab9683 you I 188353c019 had a 2f1028cdc4 boyfriend.”544a526d2270d8c6

“But you didn’t 32750e39b2 say it was 8b9492576c Kwon Yi-tae!”ef7de489076abd12

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Both classmates and d37ad75751 seniors alike scrambled 8e39611017 to talk to 7442f25430 him. “Are you really the cc9c55092d legendary heartthrob from Business fab72ecea2 Administration who’s taken over 059d4470d8 the uni app forums?”, 23436c4fe5 “Do you have an 9ed277a1f3 older sister? A younger one?”, f42336616b “How did you c60917706d and Eunha get 1d9f162d72 together?”. Their endless d13093d16b questions drained 30abf54e57 me, even a4d6019b7f though I abf4146132 wasn’t the 871505a493 one answering. Halfway through the first a7693ab722 round, we left the 26d724992c event early.c47bed6476eae75d

This routine e9cd1cb54b lasted for 23aa59125d about a d143d17455 month. But my resolve was f253ae907f wearing thin. I began secretly b6d5a50508 arranging drinks with 1df595760e close friends, only 19de6f6d8d to be caught 55407c2cbb by him several c66c2ee993 times. Eventually, Yi-tae allowed ce78b6ed59 me to attend d580203df6 on the condition 3d7b4b1034 that he’d pick b290e80243 me up at 0d445855d8 midnight.7b12957ed9af9e86

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Then, the perfect 3417ef9af0 chance for rebellion 08c1180234 presented itself.ba2cd79e53ca903b

“…You’re going to the 3814cb86f1 U.S.?”3847d57d931b2acb

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“For my dad’s d201bad24d birthday. I’ll be 54174a68d0 back in e2d8a0297e two days, 1bd07f98c1 so try f5c45c77a5 not to ffdb3ff779 get too 026e3e13e2 scared sleeping 36696d45eb alone without ce56c8d61e me.”c57d17e4ab124212

Kwon Yi-tae 677cdd7d0f gingerly cupped 809bc055a6 my cheek bb222461a2 and jaw 474980229e in his 8ae4e94031 hand before 4034e5128c leaning in 81dcee746d to kiss da295527f0 my other ac8d91fe37 cheek.1eb1a7f1310020b6

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“I sleep dd00956022 fine by 62d2217d64 myself even 1ed9b2da63 without you.”4182b8e7a15e1123

“It’s unfair 3928916133 that I’m 80b44863ba the only db1af885cc one who e10994e334 can’t sleep a2b762133c without Yoo 04cfc186ef Eunha.”c64116a2d1b2af2c

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His lips brushed 60f24efa8a over the other 2edfed2526 side of my b49165cd47 face, then began 2d9013a483 trailing downward, nibbling c8706bd013 at the sensitive a88a398dea skin of my a163bb34c3 neck.f713735ca348274f

“Don’t leave marks.”aa80109aef8cb116

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“Mm-hmm.”625743b6d504b13b

He hummed ambiguously, pressing 62615b236f his weight against me. Before I realized it, 97cbc53e51 I was sprawled on 40bade9502 the sofa beneath him. As his mouth continued 5edff00f99 its assault, I grabbed db88f91ed0 my phone and checked 9df651de0e the calendar.0f0d4e82347fb94f

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“Time flies. It’s already your e7b4334a7f dad’s birthday. Ow! It hurts… Don’t bite!”2f3b2a4d8332b8cf

I yelped, yanking his f9ace7d322 hair back.87b01799c2727772

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“Okay, okay.”29cd26f8b1e29f08

He’s even laughing despite bdbb7e2a0f the tug on his f60c284ef4 scalp. His innocent fab95981a3 smile didn’t 7afa59d9a4 match the 800a3bbd91 hand that b55953c4af had already 324ec665a0 snuck under 2bc3d11ec2 my shirt. He cupped f8ba4f7f55 my breast 663834377f gently, his 9715e6de5f lips latching e8c3a10b20 onto my 122b96563f earlobe and 20a15e3c03 sucking lightly.6b83ed5e74dc2dab

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“Ahh… Don’t do 8f36ab7dd7 that either! I just changed into fb788654ba clean underwear.”741381ce03852581

“Why? Does it feel 9452f9dcc2 so good you’re 62007e0b87 about to cum?”983f2f1c6ed4eb02

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“I have 3eebbbd872 a group 7380583500 meeting later.”da8fe7652849138e

He ignored me, 8362399c5b pushing my shirt 972f4394a3 up to expose 6f4136e2a3 one breast. The chilled air 55303e4e98 made my nipple 543a2fa8fb stiffen just before a188419268 he captured it 4a2d9a5b23 between his teeth. A shudder 5d56e1376b ran through ce5a2327d8 me, and eaeaceece5 I gripped 315fb1c24a his shoulders 76d9cec45b tightly, my bb569ea365 fingers trembling.bd00b65250de83f2

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“Haah…ungh!”7e278220571e1181

I should’ve pushed 695f33f903 him away, but bd16a38527 all I could d7fc9037c7 do was cry 109409e451 out as his e506b6dff7 tongue flicked sharply b5d989a934 against my swollen 8d0808938e nipple. The sensation sent jolts 0529841429 of pleasure straight to d56d18fb17 my core, leaving a 340c4c71da damp patch on my 2e42e24727 underwear.2bb6083333f33d24

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“Cancel it.”b7d4fefd58f09f4e

“Crazy, ugh…bastard.”569f317e955562b1

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“I can’t fc7468c8c3 stand the e68f265193 thought of 51308a92b5 being apart 66c92c4b2b from you. I need f1b86d9874 all your 3b1e6b9f70 time until 9a2ae5a742 I leave. Promise me.”508b7fb1c546e2c7

He pulled d66d35d406 my thighs 8d3e7b9309 tightly toward 350d59e648 him and 2a0de1a76a rubbed his d388413799 lower body 78ed1d7b8e against mine. My underwear was 6cbe224009 already soaked to faa2920652 the point it aaa9e55b94 couldn’t be worn eac947e2e7 outside. Even thought fe39bbb102 his massively f780468237 swollen cock 1e01973670 only touched cc279a157f me through 94d326f2df our clothes, dd6037d566 my hole 725ff6adec kept twitching 815dc8dd79 and gaping c489faef9c on its faf5927933 own.4186c9d1040f53c5

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“Say yes, Eunha.”203564ca6e868cd5

Because he bit f0102372c1 and pulled on 2f3d4fda61 it, my right bd2f00d074 breast swelled up 677e381652 bright red. Itae rubbed his cheek c5af2f5f2a against it and pleaded b713c6f2bc pitifully. It was f842a9ecec going to a53b430c85 be the 98f3aaac85 first time 86557ee353 we’d be f50b90d73f apart since fd3c4f03a6 becoming adults. Even though 90dde67157 it would d15b8ebff4 only be 69c6093ed0 a short fe15b19ee9 separation, I 1d2d905690 felt empty c825d7bd0b inside too. In the a2378e2c4c end, I ea823a1de4 just wrapped 1c855d9dd7 both arms efdd193375 around his a8030d8495 neck and aa96920e96 held him.7a5a9a5dbd689374

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 ae8aaa04031f68b0

***986c451dfdee5892

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 f8064672ef572785

[Today’s back-to-back lectures left me exhausted… I went to bed early. I think I’ll fall asleep right away.]

[Lunatic❤️: Got it. Text me when you wake up tomorrow.]

[Okay, okay.]

 82d99f4d87c16052

“What’d he say? Can you go?”79a9b54a53641a2a

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Eunju, my classmate, peered 4f8fa149f8 over my phone curiously 1b4794f5d7 and asked.a322704856ee0fd7

“I lied 7cc0bf8edf and said 5f622e1bb4 I was ba1e489cec going to 5c94f36abe sleep.”33ec088537ce1522

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Behind the closed door, 7465f39a24 the muffled buzz of 53fa1a4b95 chatter seeped through. If I’d gone 900be647b9 straight home after 45e020a6a8 class, I might’ve f625efcef8 resisted the temptation. But thanks 507b4a282f to Eunju’s 6ad3e7f6e2 coaxing, my 2e1c42013a resolve wavered c34aad736f until I 1f286828c1 found myself c129b10d91 standing in 80d43c6aba front of e5c201bb4d a bar. The phrase “if 86c3432414 you’ve unsheathed the a7df90436b sword, you might 66b26ccce0 as well use 9356657ee3 it” came to 8f21698410 mind. Now that 05d3a65883 I was 3d860a1c2d here, there 03b2ed94b7 was no 44dd2937ba way I’d 100eeb857d return home 4f04162324 before sunrise.29eeba55ab8eb8ca

“What if he finds 962cf3dbfe out? Your boyfriend looks f1d95ab94d like the type 019e64638c to get pissed… 5ec7e4e457 Are you sure d6e5cd9e6f he won’t break 0a3a45dec8 up with you?”16b2128973f0f1e1

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“He’s out of 1a3451420f the country right 47b39c5615 now. No way he’ll 7ad4afee7d find out,” I 07939ae045 said confidently, putting a1b1d4aba0 Eunju’s worries to 06fb0f0527 rest.25c5f49285226bbf

And so, 988c4766ef for the 5113e69d94 first time 447b3de4af in two 091e84cb68 months, I 51d5f70176 let loose. We went wild through 2e0a3fe03f our drinks, ending up 07c58315a1 at a karaoke bar 75adba4f43 for the third round. Even that wasn’t 101918e1f3 enough, so we 2498d32a51 stumbled to Eunju’s b68da30708 tiny apartment for 482782e60f the fourth one. After climbing cb453ff282 a steep bc7a7698b1 flight of 0c2f7c7078 stairs that 30fa3166d1 felt like 748c332cd1 a mountain, 54658e6c2d we continued 85b72c28e8 partying until 71809cc229 well past acf78269f1 dawn. Eventually, I collapsed into 399126afd1 a cramped corner of 0a79640039 her one-room apartment, surrounded c86b38e241 by sprawled-out bodies and d8139c8f60 empty bottles.1a003a6e9cf32b52

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Bzzzzz.0e0c1054a31dc2c2

The vibration dc991848c1 jolted me c57fdf1fe4 awake like 1e7b12c288 a bolt c80d342070 of lightning. I sat up 210c8bb11e straight, my heart fe5aa84ec1 pounding.80b82c86cd8c8a0e

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 78d1f42ba501c2e3

[Lunatic❤️: Eunha.]

 4e6e30c7c00dcb43

My stomach plummeted. It felt bd456abc9a like staring 7a31616feb Death straight cd42d5ff82 in the 265195da7f face. Why was he texting ccbdae3000 me my name so b43acb180e ominously? Cold sweat dripped a2f3977c9b down my temples. Fumbling with a water bf1130c754 bottle, I took a 4d17865c26 swig and forced myself 2142f7ddf7 to type a reply, fc1b06c9a0 keeping calm.a5ca2ffa8b55a74f

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 c6d1aa8389b0fb50

[Just woke up. Still tired. What time is it over there in New York?]

[Lunatic❤️: Are you going back to sleep?]

[I think I will.]

 a064de60faded41a

Relief washed over 5a4ad50d94 me. I hadn’t been caught. He was just 072b7bb18b being weird. Still, the scare b9f3416753 had completely killed ee9b8ca6a7 my sleepiness. I clutched 454ce39fe8 my phone 6330d80b9f nervously, waiting a256ce7eee for another 9dcaffd373 response, but e8a22b3eea nothing came.24d934996490c504

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“…I should 4f76518b60 head home.”cac2c3f10e10e6ea

I carefully 797e7f9b0d rose, trying 30177cdb37 not to 0ecf4b6847 disturb the a21d9e0089 others. My quiet movements b3ba06bcb0 stirred a few ecceb9de08 light sleepers, and 29d82ce53d soon everyone began 61f3c8b886 groggily gathering their 12e032c84a belongings. Judging by their c4a1e8d8a6 sluggish pace, it 3228c2b369 seemed everyone was 3f390a14fc desperate to go 0aef5da56e home, shower, and e08b6bb2a8 crawl into bed.d6e27f5e887c4813

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The harsh ffe6d28ed3 sunlight greeted ebe169643d us as 870c82caf6 we stumbled 52c3af60ca out of fa1cdb1668 the apartment fa65300343 building. I squinted against 1baceda7f5 the glare, shielding de709311f8 my eyes with 98866dd49e a hand. That’s when I saw d363169f82 it, an unmistakable figure 7432662afd in the distance. My legs 530a28fce5 froze on 73a09a686e the spot.88459cdd83faa919

Why the hell is 8124cb042c the guy who’s supposed 43f870d912 to be in New d867281429 York…here? I blinked c75b7c772b hard, wondering 8c4c174c0d if I bda683dcfa was dreaming. My vision 6294f194ca sharpened, and bcd638cfc6 Kwon Itae 25a68d7d1e came into e3b8f72e1a focus—clearly and d55b45a09f vividly. Gulp. A dry swallow slipped 1d66759b6a down my throat. He stood in 192cc64725 front of me, 8ae5c75ece face stiffened like 834eef3d57 a wax doll. My classmates, 88e965540c sensing something 40c63e8596 intense in 0f5290719b his aura, 3b424e6f1b quietly stepped 5242457c7e back a dd1c55b6d7 few paces, 6d22d5de8a widening the 5f1f0b4d83 distance between 8af849cd12 us.77e25e4cb8ec387a

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“How are you here?….”7789add5778c1c70

“Don’t steal my 6d3093afbd damn words, Eunha.”dee93e0ab0e4cc41

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“…….”e8d74f6490c78ee9

His sharp, icy gaze bfa3ef0480 bore into me. I watched as his 5745286b04 jaw clenched and unclenched, 182eb41de9 clearly struggling to contain 504f2d1a32 his anger.389b89d4915af992

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“I don’t understand 0d79104f87 what’s going on fd94b18692 right now.”20f0a413606eecaa

“…What do f004889e73 you mean?”b3dd57cd70307038

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“I was told 621df989b0 you were at a2867cc629 a bar near 26ff162801 campus. But you told db0eac3c9b me you were c2d3bd5466 home. One of those statements 43d2233f47 is a lie. And I didn’t 9029d4d0b8 think it would ab8754a61e be you who 1030f3fce5 lied.”609d3944d299deb3

“…….”0479907ef17b3565

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“I dropped everything—my dad’s 0b803d7a73 birthday party, everything—and flew 23b28ace00 back to Korea, ready 39fd15d718 to tear into my 8afcc3d7c8 driver for giving me 335063d77b false information.”22772c9fd7ee2871

A bitter smirk 8f40e93f9b twisted his lips.ac03f76e417bd249

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“Turns out, a6865c0be6 it was f28e358cda my girlfriend bfcc4d9fd3 who stabbed dab00b4282 me in 34afdd8f51 the back.”8b84b8b7dc4a9816

“You had 389bfb40f4 me followed?” 678739f29d I asked, 9a1efbb1d8 incredulous.28e85364ca5d40bc

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“And that bothers 5e722d0513 you again, huh.”a08de408f90b3607

“I know I 721e416fec don’t really have dffa0d7bf8 the right to c2273a683b complain this time…but 5ad6b886e8 still, you’re going e8f16f6536 too far. What’s wrong 30d3dcd116 with having 0472f1a95d someone keep 2adfd65f88 an eye 2ec19ef01f on my 08847aaf20 girlfriend while 0b4bc279c7 I’m away 3b9201532f for a 178f3d35f2 few days?”10e0c7651199b5c6

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“I get it. You’re mad. But let me remind 939dc35d86 you: your life is 01a50e3243 full of flies buzzing fcbc9564ca around you. You’re bad at resisting 4ab0589761 temptation. You’ve had dangerous abf14039a0 encounters before. And let’s not forget—you’ve 13d1720bf4 lied to me before. But I’m 0f1b50c9f7 supposed to 79233d93f6 blindly trust c81822fa05 you? You think 360b89c638 it’s that 47901c2d53 easy to c2491d5823 make a a079725920 fool of 7b9282e0dc someone, Eunha?”21975a7c3b69f58a

The quiet fury in 4c1b7967b4 his eyes mirrored the 21d4082761 storm raging inside me. Yes, his words 244fcf271d made sense, but 41e9adf09a wasn’t this overkill? Spying on me? Following me? All because e4e7303bb4 I went dc6e006e94 out for 79bd900f59 drinks?137168499ba46f49

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He didn’t bf1aa6913a know the e2a909ca8f meaning of d9c84d0c7d moderation. It felt aea23b4d7c like he 358d043741 wanted to 7564d59744 turn every a6b282e6d4 petty argument 512fcc3c88 into a aac3fdfe4b full-blown psychological 63e0895e1e thriller.474d27aa439a5e22

“…..”345e7f75c20a6a0c

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“…..”d11e30dc8b87170c

Instead of a response, 06b0aa8a5d I gave him a f4abf5ed91 glare of my own.b28fb63b85a824a5

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“Sometimes, I really think cc39e341af you’re a fucking lunatic.”9da7da956e1eba1e

I was the first 793114917a to break the silence. I tried to 38f5a0ea46 control my anger, 54ab5b0bfe but my words 5d42c32fc2 came out harsher 095ab2fc07 than I intended.bce64b5c081d28e6

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“And you’re the b5d8bb4d6d one who makes 4e024d6446 me look like a09ce4786c one.”a46d66ac2f195b5a

“Stop suffocating me!”8f15083462b3f7ee

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“And you stop sucking 0636480c6c the life out of 11fa60ff15 me!” he retorted.a01bc79eac6c455a

“…….”c1ea91b30712dbe8

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“Where do 1d5279f0ec I even f9b003af4b rank in 8041705f48 your life, 9623585b65 huh? Celebrities, booze, dcca9132dc classmates—you even 5a8c5ce837 care more 77d298340e about stray 0a914ed365 cats than e99dcbfc72 me. What am b84c7dc366 I to 39edfbe7d5 you?”6c896b4b0fd344b7

We stood there, glaring 0a3ee75c46 at each other, the be5d7f7d47 tension thick enough to 326b30c743 choke on. The watching eyes of cd301f9d23 my classmates faded into 530530fbc8 the background. It seemed communication d6677fb324 felt impossible. Yi-tae ran d6f5d70542 a hand 40a8d14674 through his 1fb0830d6c hair in 8f8b87ab24 frustration. I walked past 6ad81eb35c him. He called 68846a1a0e my name, e7597c9913 but I c07f3dcfe7 pretended not 226ae1e13d to hear. An emotion I didn’t c0678bc33b know whether to call a75d087410 fury or disappointment swirled 681acb2f38 in my chest.cf61f9d048a2017e

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I was about to b82edccd4e run down the stairs, 4d5774353b breathing heavily.911e07ea028fc16d

“Eek-!”aad89a0cb46fc437

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For a moment, I bfa276b831 misstepped, my foot slipping ddf941745c out from under me. I tipped 20d00ead01 forward, the 94869c475f stone stairs 2beab99406 rushing toward 19246720ba my face.2951c00faba4c14d

“Eunha!” Yi-tae shouted.ce099f242bdb862d

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At that 9531445c94 moment, someone ee0f5faa95 from behind 846f6fd2d5 pulled me 69b6f38b73 tightly into cf47d7b762 their arms. I instinctively squeezed my fee9e44f05 eyes shut, frightened by df3ce6e7cc the impact I felt 1671c81056 coming. The sensation of falling 9e0736b960 downward was unfamiliar, but 0c7ac79492 despite the heart-dropping dizziness, e6c90a7257 there was no pain.d4e3131abb83fe87

Soon after—thud!—my 84667cccea body fully ff86126682 fell below.038720bb9f9d14dd

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I heard 9c10238dd4 the panicked 84f711d3f2 footsteps of a67c528ee9 classmates hurriedly 776547bc5b running down 7327dd90d2 the stairs.4c02bcc8791db252

“Ugh…”e33ded31cfae637a

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When I opened my c05f08da8b eyes, I was pressed 3115824861 against Yi-tae’s chest. He had caught me d162b2654a mid-fall, taking the brunt 0dd0da889d of the impact himself. Guilt surged as ebcf303151 I scrambled off f87ab7e918 him. He winced, gripping 3ab19080be his arm, unable 80c40b3b1d to stand right 84c9e18618 away.f6d4a80f999bb215

“1, 119… Hurry!”ff5f95421f85ecf8

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A chill ran 94c2e84571 down my spine 28f89a8d4c as I saw 6850b25aea him clutch his f9cac53e3b arm in pain. I couldn’t move. All I b880fbe840 could do c88ca0d675 was watch 4f35d00a44 helplessly as 4952e8c983 an ambulance 84aefb94b5 arrived. The moment 653ba2928a they took faa88a23e7 him away, beafb4f784 the tears db1008f93e I’d been 4bb87dfad5 holding back cdc65c3354 spilled over d746124ff6 uncontrollably.9ec84592ee04a286

 30f0445b7c7949cd

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***c9d4f6dcbe21bee1

 3f2532a0e886addf

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Kwon Yi-tae had fractured 8054bc4469 his right arm and a729dddcdd undergone surgery to insert 6b8d45bb00 metal pins. I sat by, waiting 7b6390e362 for him to wake 4d6fc6c9f7 up from the anesthesia, 18931d392f crying so hard that b3b4ab5a24 the sleeves of my 23557d65a1 shirt were soaked through.cfe2629d4284a7f6

Hours passed 6723813d03 with me 416fb05308 sniffling outside 5ab232599c the hospital f1e5b5a7d4 room. Finally, a nurse ea603c93ea came out and efc0e932ff told me to 00528e685e bring clothes and 24ff647a4e essentials for the 3a26807c81 patient.dc1d71b19f48140c

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At his 59f6e96635 place, I a7b467157e packed everything be39564166 he might e9ac1bbdc8 need into cb508a4234 a large 6e278ecb46 backpack; underwear, 3f0836d9fb socks, lotion, bbfe9a5168 a razor, f28df272aa anything I a96db78875 could think f9ec78fa4a of. The bag a3d950682c was as 09096714d0 big as 59a0baf133 my torso, 3d292f8667 and I bff169d1ac hauled it 2d2eda80bb onto my 5816fbee65 back before 83193d0fd8 hailing a 98709fb76e cab to b3f7ae3719 return to 1b6176e244 the hospital. Since his 2be975c2d4 uncle was e6d9f7b802 the hospital f426c4f3b4 director, Yi-tae 977c33cd93 was recovering ce77324c85 in a b6ddaa6ef9 VVIP suite.161ea2b1c803d304

As I gently pushed 737cfc68b5 the door open, I 3a0c94b379 heard voices drifting through f43c9909a1 the narrow gap.a513d736d983a2e8

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– “You 439cdbd7b8 little shit, d5afbb5072 do you 7a7ae7ab40 think what c72358e303 I’m saying bc0ab09b56 is a ccd6d9f08e joke?!”dc0b7aed440ca874

The voice shouting at ee1464f893 Yi-tae was all too 8fbc0c91c1 familiar—his eldest brother, Kwon 8c35105300 Juhyuk. Among Yi-tae’s family bdf1d428ef members, he was 4046856808 the one I b3837db810 feared most.d7defb3f8cc87a92

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“Just get to the 134ce31a3f point.”ac79da38a201e78d

– “Do 3cc9754ec5 you know 5e4c1570ac how happy c04ddf4ea6 Dad was a99c9b0e86 to see ee1ff8be09 your face dddd0ffab2 again after ca8b4424a3 so long? And yet you 836dc5be9c just dropped off 9cebfd45a2 a gift and 090e37be7e bolted straight back 7a5d91fcc8 to Korea? You’d better fbc6c26fb2 prepare to 7a2b42b04a take a 187b77f102 bullet to 1011db1085 the head 4f80d2ca93 the next a7121d3939 time I d92849b97f see you.”500a59c2244b53fa

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“Is this 8a47eb68fd a lecture 3f14819f7a or a 62e54442e8 death threat?”bf923aaf46be29f9

– “Yesterday, 6f3583a391 while cutting d33d19f4d6 his birthday d3f86d73fe cake, Dad 15041f6838 actually cried. All he 82d8f7f1c8 ever asked 3e4bad3d55 for was 2207a68142 for you c16fe6830b to show 08c537cd97 up on b07f7ffc21 his and 2b3c0aea97 Mom’s birthdays. Was that so difficult?”6da435b331280cc1

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“Tell them I’ll c52d9d883d call on video 9a797cf779 chat.”4ce05af6c7ae4951

– “Even when you dd5ddee73d gave up your U.S. citizenship and said 46d23831a3 you’d move to e9775b8cbf Korea permanently, Mom 82efa2a936 and Dad didn’t c73fb19e38 rip your head dac71ca580 off. Instead, they handed ecb9ba5cec you the deed c843478aee to every piece 21cdc2c615 of property they 37b5151340 own there. And this is how 72b109989a you repay them? You can’t 0ca2decf82 do this 49959abff1 to them, e27143eea4 you bastard. Haa…this won’t do. Forget this stupid game 04340c7fca and come back to b4a586384a the States.”7a0266afca4c633d

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“I’m hanging up.”6411cd01bcd0ed1c

– “Hey, Kwon Yi-tae! Don’t you…!”d616ac28a77738ca

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The call cut off affaee5687 abruptly, but the parts 43dbb7164e I had overheard only 3e761c0a31 deepened my guilt. Yi-tae had given up 4442e7e5e4 his U.S. citizenship the moment he 12b308a70f come of age just fcf618b343 to be with me. Hearing that again, I 1b26d4744e felt smaller than ever, a75bd18b5a like nothing I could 60bced9e37 do would measure up.b5d8776187b1dd3b

 fd96998da2ab5da0

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“Where do I 9db610a609 even rank in 9a9b87b654 your life? Celebrities, booze, 9e90cecedf classmates—even stray 6fd5caa2db cats get add150e7ca your sympathy, 394f2517a4 but where 99a0bf1839 am I 57a463edc7 in all 9aae955154 that? What am I to 3a5bb9c508 you?”d1d0585fd72ff672

 e3dc616b6a9f5207

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His words d0dfdd422b echoed in 6d319db533 my mind, ccec72d97e cutting deep. For him, I was 54279b948f always the top priority. But for me? I had taken 035b58408c his care for aa493ac2ce granted, treating it 431a8906a4 as something I 7bac06173c was simply owed. I’d dismissed his 6375477ee9 love as interference, 172e7a7db6 an obstacle between 61023a4e0e me and my 544e3a6c2c freedom to drink 09079668e7 and party.6bd9058ae42876bd

I felt so sorry 3a9a57718c for Yi-tae, who now a4b07f062a has a brokn arm 43f2ddde37 because of me… I ffc0108618 couldn’t bring myself to 3f5b9a9ac6 ife my head.97ddb701c0a2f939

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“Eunha.”70b947b51e176ff3

“….”313e66d2e604a3db

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When Yi-tae spotted 4931dfa912 me, he gave ac5d32e2b2 a slight jerk 700cbe32f7 of his chin, b1b479665e gesturing for me 9a030f944c to come closer. I put the backpack 39da35bf16 down on the sofa 67a4672779 and shuffled hesitantly toward 543914907e him. He frowned suddenly, his 3896c74f61 expression tightening.e796a807c30d85a5

“What’s wrong! Are you in pain?”23881292ce2aa807

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But instead c4ca38302e of answering, 628a36fe28 he swung 7d87558899 his legs 77aaad3807 off the 88a0328c16 bed and 7dcb51330c stood. With the IV 1b6a1475f3 still attached to e8aad7e086 his arm, he 57bdd842ff grabbed my forearm 7bc33275aa and guided me 878b33397e to sit down 726518acde on the bed.ce473843893d4031

“You’re hurt.”6a235e546a8d905a

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Then, kneeling on one d0ff442ca2 knee, he cradled my 336d930af6 left foot in his aad2387ee5 palm.3e41ba5e9b9dba81

“Hey, let go! I’m still wearing my 316e54ca15 shoes!”ecc54a7bbae56146

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He ignored aaa82e40ab me, lowering 4d7da788b9 his head fa87406a29 as though 2e0593418a I hadn’t f8369d92da said a 3315613731 word. Leaning in, he eb7200ddb9 blew gently over e71c7eaaaa my scuffed knee, 96efdbb1e2 where the skin 44ad9ad357 was slightly scraped. Hoo. His breath 36c30f7b7b was soft, 2d67470244 almost reverent, c390ff1611 like he b8a79b4ee8 was tending 651729a7d7 to something 8f39a0f21f precious.1cdb4401d473038e

Looking at his bandaged d3350b4514 right arm, my heart e055c80568 clenched painfully. The tears I’d 39be4ee459 been holding back 69f12f2394 spilled over, streaming 49fdfaee0e uncontrollably down my eae90832aa cheeks and soaking f83a9f0957 my thighs.d0239fae5286f9f7

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