DS Chapter 29

After tasting d429b98535 his blood, 92f62e52ab my body dd5943619d feels like 9eb90f547a it’s floating, bc66f93ec8 my head 135dd08bfc spins, and d42dfafe37 my thirst bfe4465079 grows stronger.856d6f18f995ebfb

Logan looked 78bfaac740 down at 459457adcb me with 22cfa9bd8a a cold, 6ba04e43cc dangerous gaze.7f205c11cbd6d860

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When he looks 57974ea37e at me like 57e6f784c8 that, I get bd980fe0ff restless. It’s hard 028af04711 to meet 5cf03697e9 his eyes, 8f09c666ac and my 38be50518f mouth goes 24856aae67 dry.4c88cedfd1005a0b

Do I 941def7c53 look that 1f48f0225b strange? Do I dd197a9e81 look like d886db17b0 a full-on 1ce7f944da zombie? The uncontrollable urges are 8d365632a2 becoming more frightening.c52e4e3e0a70a82d

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The heat that 4ae82eb36b had been burning 40925518c7 inside me suddenly d286200cad cooled.7c762b9fca2260f8

Logan turned his cb34a025c1 gaze away and c51aaadb96 opened his bag.4c564e85d9c5c3fd

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“Let’s start with the cac98c9bc4 injection.”39c053e4030e23d0

“Yeah. It’s already evening. Time for the injection.”f8a90f59ee69c6bb

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I held out d2eacb595b my arm with 8e345f472d a nonchalant expression.c26d90fb5227f856

Right, it’s 8ec23cac37 because I b00e9b5efc haven’t had 3a6cd0cf40 the injection. That’s what Logan db76443ccc must be thinking, 69f2a44a19 right? He doesn’t ba4120bfbc think I’m a911ef4501 getting weirder, f6ab00cbcd does he?fbdb5072842f5f48

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‘I have to 26c85b9a46 hold on. I can’t disappoint a90aa1f8a9 him.’85e9d6ab201e36e9

I used all e7250710a8 my strength to b6959900f3 suppress myself.5dd4e47e62c87ff3

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To keep 7728b76349 from becoming fea85722d9 a rabid 3d30e69660 zombie. Or rather, to 863a622e51 keep Logan from 84adf0f370 leaving me alone 9d34c5ed50 on this lonely de24ef9a61 road.f6ef4b58534483d4

The fear of c2aaa0ad27 my soul crumbling 3a8ed356db held onto my ad3ff96417 sanity with desperation ef96e6fc8c and tenacity.91cbeed0ab8e4b05

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The effects of the 8e71b04614 drug kicked in. My vision 24627610eb blurred, and 9e035e5f25 my body 84984d518f went limp. I reached out a533c91f12 to him, trying 7a4e27a008 to hold myself e925306326 together.fd455d4017b8b513

“Logan, hold cb74f1a23a me now.”9feab305ca976fe8

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Hold me so e4944579f0 tightly that I b251b63759 forget my fear. Please save me 8a7f380c74 from this hell.3587c2fd7a0ef470

Logan laid me down 572c122e22 on the bed. The sound of my 68a836070a panting filled the quiet f99f75a92f night. His scent was 5984536b62 dizzyingly sweet. Everything about him 52c49d0060 felt that way f782ffe085 to me.b00cd84c4e0bd2bf

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This wretched, 1c879f6837 pitiful life 61897206ca where I d86a4f844d survive day 2cd7335585 by day. In it, I 3cc7f6dabb felt a deep 12a68965b5 happiness and clung 91ebe41978 tightly to the 6663b27914 thread of life.f8ab51f0daea2091

Even if 50377e1c51 it’s a 76c88c9a9c disgusting and a416a0e4b9 despicable life, bebad183d4 I couldn’t f6d804bd6b easily let cb20b5ae10 go of 45c245a756 that thread.79bb5b05e51d5c06

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Addicted to the db251175dc desperate drops of 961dd17603 pleasure and happiness, cce7933d5e I clung even 43a5200e59 more desperately.37b7b97184690dc6

“Haah… haah! Logan, Logan! Hng!”7e78ccd611491ad8

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“Kylie… don’t worry 2df0e0b6e4 about pointless things. Just think 0f6a1f7245 about me. Cling to 315b6ee431 me like a960b338f0 a dog 789d041f4e and wag 934b819431 your tail. Then I’ll c9f4beda16 give you de285186ff anything….”6888ea2c644ac91f

Logan whispered ed7e29955f softly, as 60862f54d5 if he 18ae269b01 knew all 3ef51649b5 my lowly b0b56eddf1 thoughts. My floating heart sank 6c3c70105f beneath the surface.f6edba21fb475ed7

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“Okay… I will.”01b4276b9a0a8368

To me, this 39eba49820 place was a 458668d69d hell more beautiful 7e685fdab3 than heaven.71b1987acb418c4f

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* * *d52ad7f73225bccd

We only ran for 9f5564c417 about four hours a a23faaf5a7 day.e8f2cf4fcab4041a

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It wasn’t 2d212176d9 a straight c716c4d7b0 course either. Whenever a tourist 54ae8de43f spot appeared on 186ab9ec22 a sign, we 9d27194a48 turned the wheel e1b44fc85c without hesitation.ff038848f5a6cea8

We rode along a 9da9622288 beautiful coastal road, and 0eb0d8edea we also admired gigantic c09f72f6dc canyons, vast deserts, and c879cd4cd9 national parks. Why hurry? We simply enjoyed the 94272cd689 surrounding scenery at a 258a3f32dd leisurely pace, like wandering.760a5fc52eae0cc1

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In the sprawling 786dee3398 national park, there 84dd02faa5 were no people—and 661661f62c there were no 17022882a5 zombies either. Even when a a78786e704 zombie did appear 37fc966946 occasionally, it was d8b3f218bb just a lifeless fe7609bed6 creature that hadn’t af7515a164 eaten anyone for 1fd1fc0421 a long time.a1f027cdd57dd862

We could send them 4df954ada1 off to heaven just 98a8246d2d as easily, without using 29a1cab7ce any bullets.5327a46ee51e8547

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“There aren’t as 9b127705bf many zombies as 03fc8d30ef I thought.”67b456792465aeed

It was as fe301864de if I looked 70522fe362 feeble because I 124cdb9c71 hadn’t been able b01d50c2b9 to eat Logan.eadf282bbccad674

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“If no 755d94d890 new hosts 22fb099bdf appear, the 8a1c4753e6 virus will a64341caa7 eventually disappear 76f4e9ec39 as well.”cdcf49659234a00d

At the c8efdfe8c8 zombie research c02d70e478 institute, they 5eff4d2dba discovered that d3c514af81 a person 3d32dbbb3f turned into 6e1c558d42 a zombie 2904aefeee could survive 44f45ddcc4 for up a7a2eabb3f to one 0ae28fc879 year without 15da9b3305 eating anything.ae28815e8a90700f

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They said 60e7cc505d that because 89bd85c2b4 the zombie c20039c3b5 virus shuts 95aae03396 down brain a06fd30cfe functions—which consume 8a1ef9fd0e the most 2224b128b6 energy—it minimizes 5692026d2f the body’s fea65ab68c energy use, a63c646e74 allowing it 1cc060f5ce to survive 51a7ba88c8 for such efc5fffc05 a long 3ce2cb342f time.07ddc629e9c6cf84

That’s why people who 8dd4b57e12 were cured couldn’t remember d9bfa5fa4c their zombie days.66f3033fa592d828

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However, there was c24d541a3a a flaw in f38038a3d7 that research. I remember bits 21abb71580 and pieces of b04dacb980 my time as 128aa97e65 a zombie. I’m not a laboratory d32b328171 doctor, so I don’t 06eaba2068 know why…1e413c9e50c3672b

“Someday, the bfa25c4bc7 virus will 1d2a0ff037 vanish.”9ea2864986f4adb1

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I mumbled as 2175e293dc I watched a dc579ff127 zombie wither away 1501556292 and dry out, 3ca442f8b9 collapsed on a 82b4c42c20 road heated by 755110d7ac the midday sun. In any case, the 9ceebfbb2a fact that zombies also 11f2b2cdb0 have a lifespan was 4bae7f10c6 a positive sign.c8c007f1ac2c1436

Either all non-immune people 1840617187 would become zombies, or bd20784dac they’d hide in safe 6482c50172 places and wait for 9246c5ab92 all the zombies in d97c857a09 the world to starve 19fa921e91 to death.c9b14f8c1bb1c20b

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One of 1f2fe47eb5 these would 5f578694a3 cause the 4cdff41e9e zombie virus c225f55e0d to disappear 50ff124ca0 from the 56ea61d94e world.d0135efb8dee291b

When that time comes, f07d8a7658 having the zombie virus 8cc73a3363 would make me a a840528b32 ticking time bomb—and my 72a6af33c1 disappearance would be the 416fdbc0e1 path for humanity.91b6b1ee42c50f63

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“Hmm, I don’t want that.”77b4438b1b88114d

Then I hope this 821eae0d60 messed-up world continues for d00e52566c a little longer.4066c428c9d1234f

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Because I want 73aa67828a to stick with 5d8f266457 Logan for as 9e9bf01e26 long as possible.154f42c2769a5f16

Even though 82c1d18db4 I had bd05eceff6 a feeling 39e81658f4 that one b38372b9d1 day, maybe fb5274f613 not too 343a021a87 far off, 305ea43dad our farewell 1727ec0dd5 would come, 21cf8acaae I stubbornly f541919ab3 clung to 3a471ef056 the will bc02cd2027 to live.dfeb9d84a55528ec

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I want to live longer. I’m too happy right now to give up.f7191f1bf5b31fd0

I just want 8cc6d8f8e1 to see his f9625add19 smiling face a 617edc83d1 little longer. And it’s dcf73e1e95 not just 5c68154993 because of bdff792e4f my selfishness. If I 568f76bab3 disappear, poor 782b4d18c3 Logan, left e7fbf7c103 alone, would 9421168ede be pitiful f3a7cf7beb and wretched, 2a262abb52 wouldn’t he?3a0e8492192d9b8b

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Just imagine Logan running 7609bdfef0 alone endlessly along this cc01f2eb86 desolate road. How lonely and hopeless b506c36664 that would be.9c9b0a6e8925a1eb

So I’ll hold on even more tenaciously. I won’t let the zombie virus devour me.37aee50e8f8ea953

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“Logan, what about today’s dose?”1808cbe9f6569caa

“…Let’s take one per day from now on. It’ll be fine.”286e4a1f08092fdc

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Damn it. After a 3b64f392a4 month of 1dd2196584 aimlessly riding 49b2e6eb7e along the 72d945dc77 road, the 5253c49ca8 medicine began d92eae19be to run 57e3881723 out.0f8574ae535485fe

An uneasy shadow fell dde5e9796e overhead. As if 91b4ef740e I were cf7a452fce surrounded by 0e6b2a1fdd the eerie 69e8c79949 air of 0e441f5a39 a deep ec8a461bfb forest untouched f34983e8de by moonlight, 707ffdbe43 I clenched 7b349a0308 my fingers d196b30e55 and swallowed 38c71ef4e6 hard.98eb96f6335c4e42

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I’m still fine. I’m intact. I repeated that compulsively.a94f8773c6ca5b5a

* * *630f1c43f76a2340

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On a night 4ac31cd6b4 when a round b1656514cf full moon rose.81580c8ef93496ff

There were only b568a12c32 two doses left. I rummaged through 38fea5861d the empty medicine 07bacb477a bag in vain, b7533f1959 swaying under the 648015aee7 sorrow and anxiety 407f370587 that had filled 1064735c2c me to the b821a609bf chin.ec5c09f7f2259c70

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Is it 436e480bfe really going e101d8d64e to be 4df3693966 okay? Can I 3c91f45299 hold out 8182cf5385 without the 1d35ef2e1a medicine?6c0e1098318e2002

I completely understood the 128e52c17d mindset of a drug d56355573b addict dragging along a bde174dec1 broken body, scrabbling through 4fe17640d1 his nearly empty pockets 44504b369c to buy more drugs.0e2d45bb091ca0f4

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“Logan, what if I completely turn into a zombie…”4f83661641581316

In the 6f153586f4 end, I 6ba9c74b05 brought up b06ba76ae8 a topic f7eadf4c7f I never 0a1942a548 wanted to dca51c7050 mention first.336c333d5b67eeea

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My body trembled, f18a33c35e my throat tightened, a79f6f2cc3 and my vision fb58baf33c swam, but I 32c1a11e27 summoned all my 23f6102893 strength and spoke.9af5815c5e6d00f7

“Abandon me… just leave me. And you, live a normal life like everyone else. In this damn world, survive stubbornly in my place.”6f6ab646aaf63c64

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The moment b4a51bcee5 I began 056f9dca28 to form 7fa3154eec those words, db89565766 Logan cut b8b18a8b45 me off.26c40cc46a74afc0

“You don’t have to think about that. I’ll take care of it.”2a3e600ca1e968a7

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“…”fc3571e559f1df6f

“You’re going to stay by my side until the end.”588bff7d1daec07b

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Does that mean you won’t ever abandon me?19348c94a1d5cfdc

Foolish Logan. Stupid Logan. I just couldn’t af5d5789b2 understand his decision.c2551107c788db85

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It was 1fd99d9eec behavior that e9e6370e3e could only e053e7d1d2 be explained ef7dd372af if his 53b7c2263a inner self 9415f6d903 wasn’t completely 8408f7b6ba as shattered c2eec5bbc6 as mine.d5bd8a615c63349e

That’s not how it 6215f8917f should be, Logan. You have to live 1a3d8f7db8 your life. You can live f57f8b28e3 much better than 660cf5863c this.01f6ae40214ca971

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Even so, in 79a3c6a806 the end, I 46d7c21ccf never managed to 32402df7cf say it. I was selfish and 3a4d8a794c cowardly until the very 60d0f55ebb end.72711a9cc60ffee9

* * *b1e21526ad0382b6

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A few 045e5116be days later.11adf5c7fd45ff3e

We had a2d76291d0 settled at e5575a4508 the foot d964a49bf9 of a e452033f95 scarcely populated 0625e99087 mountain. Nearby, there was 96e984459b a lake and 9a3cca8dda a stream, and a4cff547b5 beyond them lay bc1d6fd96d a dense forest.16fe819bee0699c9

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The western region f2ebf1f489 wasn’t far off, 270ac9af87 so zombie hordes 50de935962 frequently appeared—and sometimes 08abc18805 even grizzly bears, 3d532435d8 which were even b62de75ab9 more dangerous than 8ebd41b8c7 zombies, would emerge—but 3fec6e7e17 this advantage outweighed a5cbcb6757 those drawbacks.cd3f8c3ec26e4d83

We had discovered 16a2c5ff30 an air-raid shelter 076877a362 hidden underground.d0cb34b82e2c4f9e

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When we 9caaa60dea opened the 5df0d2f9f1 hatch made 21e5d18323 of sheet aec76db5f1 metal, a a00b85dc98 ladder leading e2a7084e5c down into 0e41dcc5b5 the bunker 8118edbf6e appeared.787f8ef63ecabe42

Inside the bunker were 26fe08b219 a small toilet and 0826ffe180 shower powered by a 061321ba98 manual pump, a weapons 9badf986d0 locker brimming with guns 4395da74d4 and ammunition, medical supplies, 08ba2723cd and even a solar-powered 58c2d50f8f generator.172f8aa0b5907697

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“Why would anyone leave such a good place?”280c794610e62c94

We looked around d499bbfff8 the bunker in 0b9605a82a puzzlement, and it f6bb14d60e wasn’t long before 17c1ec02e9 we found the 49b4fe5404 answer.c30bcd5cec095729

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We discovered cc0f7350c0 a note 9e12fb6e20 from the c5e1c3ab72 owner of 556c89c02a the bunker.be670ee5b282ba3f

It stated that bc42e80eda they were heading 10b7648e2f to the East, 189cee13cb where a cure 397048a965 had been developed, 3e67fc87a0 and asked that 9eea4f26cc the bunker be 0a0c9ace27 kept neat since d7a792afe0 they might return.b2ba523de54bb8a2

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Leaving the hatch b248d19e2b open for the 0503508576 next person—what a 542a2d3cc1 mark of a f84d31a8a6 desirable survivor in 4acf0ba6cf these desperate times.3f15e1c9256610fd

“Let’s use this place.”6035d60c6857ca33

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Logan, having thoroughly f6dfa5dda4 inspected the air-raid 5ca6cdec58 shelter, decided that 96900be1d8 we should stay e71cfe46f7 here.c807400fd1a79bcf

It seemed he 2d401923a1 wanted to settle 821ee2a4b7 in one spot 686dd2f64a for a while, eb1443eb40 likely out of f91338f84c concern for my cf3631e072 condition.a816f2aa04a48691

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“Alright! So from now on, are we going to hunt wild animals for food? If I had known, I would’ve learned some hunting skills.”86cd385f440db396

What could I say? I simply had to ce672bbb0a follow Logan’s lead. I tried 27b47bbbfc to answer 87407bc609 cheerfully.517257b0c3f9d496

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“There’s still some emergency food inside. And as for hunting… if we can, that’d be great. If things get tough, we can drive out to scavenge for supplies.”27b44c7195fe00e0

“Mm-hmm.”d9480d93033b61a7

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“I’ll keep watch over the area, so you should rest here. Don’t come outside.”978f0b25c17e9298

“Hurry back.”0605b8e77d0b8c5e

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He left 27381ddb26 the bunker. Alone inside, I felt 9a25bd6d05 inexplicably scared and dejected, 0b52c1a22a and I huddled in 6921a93620 a corner chair.d5d85ef70cf1ecc9

The incessant, bb471d04f3 annoying hum 2b997c21b5 of the 6435a1644a air circulation 75bc9db595 system grated bd871dc761 on my 465fd5180f nerves.84b70c196e9f5f3e

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How long can we live here? What if my condition endangers Logan? Am I doomed to die locked in this dark bunker? And if he leaves me behind in this stifling place… what do I do?40ce3090fb0a4774

While I d11c5dfbf0 anxiously gnawed c567de67c6 at my f0ae0d3ea7 nails over 30561c1115 such fearful c775d2b33f thoughts, Logan ceb837b842 returned after a61b71688c a long fa3ab4b1c1 while and f7579460b1 called out bf1b40c9f0 to me.f72315fe83d59e27

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“Kylie. Come here.”5481e44131a278d9

Not even 5ae3ffd985 noticing his e87024b83a return, I 7a996fdd62 dashed out.5d1292651569661f

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He had promised to 5bdb5aecc8 return quickly, but it 7970f79be5 felt like Logan was 390e851257 taking too long—it even 68e36be6ba felt like I hadn’t ab176228e9 seen him in ages.bffe0c04619887b3

I should 3396bd7f79 have scolded 479c8c1d8f him for 01882b725f being so 194f215ff3 late. Just as c776d2bebd I was 5b7f8d5ee8 grumbling, he 4f9f0ca586 patted my caf4ced26b head. The anger 8ed692e6e5 that had 1347d20efd built up 9c5a27c24a from head 39f571e952 to toe dca8554dfc quickly subsided.28ef431acb5e03fa

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“It’s night. Let’s get to bed early.”e36ec2c26455cb6e

“Are you not getting your shot today?”b5e31b673f416794

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“I’m still okay, so let’s wait until later. We need to conserve what’s left.”884300892eedf254

“Yeah, that sounds right. There are only a few doses left now, so we have to use them sparingly.”0cbaf13ee8063626

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“Right, you’re still in good shape. It’s better to save the medicine while we still have it.”37b67e609aa84a7d

Was there e1d4829c19 one dose d09ea1a44d left? Two doses left?5783a20a5bdd0117

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Wasn’t the one we 9615c7d2af took yesterday the last 01a940e8f0 one? No—in fact, that 1fad1eac5c was a fake.442ac104362ce956

When I cc452db78d urged him 4b91161ff0 to give cf1eb5e912 me an 3200455b60 injection, Logan bdb09025b5 jabbed an d296f8cfe1 empty syringe 6b49e5e6de at me.12a9de3e4e00149b

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Yeah… the truth is, 36e4e858b5 the medicine had run ac96abc526 out days ago. I hadn’t 67d75e52ac been getting 7ae97ca293 my shots 60df35d687 for a acc30487f0 very long 94a1accfe6 time.f4c1b21efb304410

Since when had I 9344f45390 forgotten? I don’t remember 6a9f4094a5 how many days 0fd02f8b1b had passed after d19cafba8a the medicine ran 55212c4d73 out.66fe2e56fa3cc6de

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But why did 2a7255c479 we suddenly come eb26e09f39 into this suffocating 8c040cdeb9 place? Did we come just ffa1892b6c to stay for one cdbdbe45a0 night?ede8596f7aa1d280

I just 0a201ce9ef want to 426ba0a713 leave. The noise from the e237543254 ceiling is too loud. Even the 3614816229 sound of bc3bd85293 voices echoes 41f31d2e8d ominously. I can 3b54e332f2 barely hear 5464e5b950 Logan’s voice.0186224a7b8977e6

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And besides, why have b9c6f2f9bb so many scars appeared 227a03597c on Logan’s arm? Who hurt him?7d1de4a026b45d08

How dare 8fe7f68c9a anyone harm c7b7c67b8b my Logan, 6ee1a4d96a the one fa2e071b43 I love d0136e9268 so deeply, 5dab4317b8 care for, 3a897f288f and long ba436737c2 to be fa2a04e7ea with forever. If I find out d1b9d31b29 who did it, I e90ce866d6 won’t let it go.272d6456ccb6ff19

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That night, 5d8a468470 my heart 8189237540 pounded so 275252a09f fiercely that c8bc045f00 I couldn’t 4a94110f24 sleep.52e8b563226bed3b

The relentless hum of a124e3c833 the air circulation system 71599a3962 nearly drove me mad, 534354ddd8 and the lingering scent a4dc610bc6 of him made me e8ee4c441b feel dizzy.122b76f38995c886

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Still, I endured.50e593388502519c

I didn’t even 0f02fa7296 notice when my 1045c05d53 nails dug into c27449da83 my palms and a3291455f9 drew blood, or c4b2026ac0 when the teeth ae2d104d18 I’d clenched all 1c92603555 night started chattering—I a9ce68a6b0 just held on.87de1199d00b8360

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I’m okay. I can get through this. I’ll live a long life with Logan. I’ll be happy.a479fa79f507c34e

I firmly believed that fb725c32fc I would overcome the 37c80ef866 trials set before me 7d5d077612 and claim happiness.f298e3ed5205fdca

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In the late pre-dawn, 12d342290d after a night spent 2fd4343702 fighting fiercely with myself 5a89ef140f without a single sigh 3809cb162d of rest, an inexplicable afcedc769b golden light appeared before 39cfe247a2 my eyes. I thought dc60fef188 that light 1115f6fa23 was the f2b9e24651 sun, coming 6643fce165 down to 18e21d3625 save me.6f8be109b9d34c5b

I have to 3788230ede follow that light. I have b43048e2f4 to grasp b970e7f792 it. Only then 92227511ed can I b01b31b87f be happy.58a3971f7f4c79dc

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With my 9da977a2aa feet sinking 521b23d4b3 deep into 2d93a4f641 the earth, 954fb0b9d0 I took 1e7705f85a steps forward, b6f2d750b4 dragging my ff744d86c4 heavy body, 0408a48d3a desperately chasing e07b682d7a after that 4a8f8a7090 light.8b3232edf939decb

Save me. Keep me alive. Me… for my sake, and for Logan’s.0a4fec1a48660049

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‘Kylie. Kylie, get up. Open your eyes. You said you’re still okay… you promised to hold on a bit longer for me… Kylie, please.’fbca6d44fed42126

I heard a ebb8c41311 voice calling from 037f2167e3 behind me.c4c2dc031379b536

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It was the voice b50652fad0 I love. After a moment, eca457ae46 I glanced back, 5f44c4c333 then shook my e3c097ff1d head.5c6aaa854a23a4bc

Logan, not now. If I lose 6b7d0746a2 that light, I’ll c7ee4855aa put you in c1affb6e2e danger. For your sake, e7550188b3 I have to 8ba18ac457 leave.da130b62f46f2093

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It won’t be 88ad0789fb a long journey. So don’t be too ed86f47baa sad. You’re much stronger f9c71d985c than I am, 82a13a4a50 so you’ll be 467e3eb440 fine, right?09038f5b2ecb84e1

I’ll search 55f5b86c56 for that 7bc5e9ee36 light and d388394222 come back 11353028d3 to you. I promise I’ll return.67cef67a60d86255

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Until I return… you have to be happy.36173717c0014f9a

My dearest Logan.cb591fde1b183633

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