DOTD Chapter 22

In my defense, I didn’t have time for a long explanation, nor was this the right place.

 

And I couldn’t think of a sentence that would clear up all the misunderstandings.

 

Evan’s misunderstanding, Adrian’s interpretation. When I said it, their reactions were mixed. 

 

Adrian was happy, and Evan was like…

 

‘Hmm… what was that look?’

 

I wondered why Evan was so good at showing his emotions on his face, but I couldn’t read his mind.

 

It was neither happy nor sad. If I had to define it, it was more like negative.

 

Not that I expected him to be jumping for joy, but I thought he’d be relieved not to have to fight.

 

Now that Evan knew I was Adrian’s friend, was he trying to keep his distance?

 

Or did he realize that all that fighting and getting hurt was for nothing? Or maybe he’s angry because he thinks I’ve been manipulative and deceitful?

 

The longer Evan’s silence lengthened, the more pessimistic my imagination became.

 

Glancing up at him, I realized he still didn’t meet my eyes.

 

‘That felt weird.’ 

 

After all, I was the one who tried to push him away, and now?

 

I’d offered to heal him, but a tinge of regret creeps in, wondering if I should have known it would be so awkward.

 

‘Should I have just followed Adrian?’ 

 

Adrian had let me go right after my mediation because he was busy with things at the Tower.

 

He seemed a little peeved that I’d forced him to go when he didn’t want to, but a Master’s got to do what a Master’s got to do.

 

Adrian, who was sulking, told me that we had to go to the Crystal Chamber to stop the monster, so I told him all about Evan’s divine powers.

 

Quietly, of course, so Evan wouldn’t hear.

 

‘Don’t worry, it’s okay if you stay with Evan, I’ll tell you the details later.’

 

‘…’

 

His eyes turned uneasy, but there was no excuse for him to stay, so he left the conference room with a word that he would send someone.

 

And with that, Adrian was gone, and we didn’t speak a word. No, we didn’t.

 

There was no end in sight to the time when no one spoke, and eventually I, the one who couldn’t stand it the most, spoke up.

 

“Um, hey…”

 

Clearing my throat, my voice sounded awkward in the silence.

 

It’s awkward to say, but I have no other choice. If we don’t talk about it, it could lead to unnecessary misunderstandings like the one we have now.

 

First, I need to hear what they have to say about the assumptions I’ve made.

 

“You fought to save me, right?”

 

“…”

 

No answer, but silence means yes, right?

 

“Thank you.”

 

Evan raised his bowed head.

 

The shade had lifted from his face, unlike what I’d feared would happen if it continued to rain.

 

It was a relief to see his sunken eyes light up and his face brighten. I wasn’t sure whether to start with an apology or a thank you, but I guess it worked.

 

Now that I’ve thanked him, here goes…

 

“I wasn’t really trying to get away from Adrian, but the circumstances made it look like I was… and I’m sorry you got hurt trying to help me…”

 

He started to apologize, but Evan, who hadn’t said a word until now, spoke up.

 

“No, don’t. Don’t apologize.”

 

Surprised, I didn’t expect him to say this.

 

“Why?”

 

I couldn’t help but ask.

 

Evan’s answer was so firm.

 

“Because it’s what I want to do.”

 

Rowan’s eyes were filled with a look that said, ‘That guy…’

 

Evan’s blue eyes never wavered. To my relief, he didn’t seem to feel betrayed by me.

 

Still, I wanted to apologize apart from that.

 

“I’m so sorry I… Oh, I see.”

 

Evan’s expression began to regain the shade it had lost.

 

‘Ugh, it’s getting dark.’ 

 

Checking his mood, I hastily changed the subject.

 

“Then I won’t apologize, but please accept my thanks.”

 

“Okay.”

 

As I watched his face brighten, I suddenly realized that it was okay.

 

‘He’s kind of cute.’ 

 

There’s an innocence about Evan that I’ve always sensed, but never found in my friends that I had to search hard to find.

 

At this point, it’s time to admit that it’s not easy to push him away.

 

Not ‘not easy’, but ‘I don’t want to push him away.’ 

 

For some reason, it was hard to be negative towards him after all the hurtful things I’d said and things that had happened, but he kept showing me a favor.

 

‘Yeah, Evan made a mistake.’

 

That doesn’t mean I’m going to hang out with him.

 

There’s still an insurmountable wall between him and me, the wall of being friends with the dark villains. At least I could encourage his dreams.

 

Besides, there are a lot of things I’ve said to him that I’ve tried to draw the line at.

 

It’s not like I’m going to suddenly reverse my attitude.

 

Who knows if Evan still wants to be with me or not?

 

As I was thinking about all this, I looked at Evan and noticed a strand of hair sticking out the side of his face.

 

Involuntarily, I lifted my hand to tidy it up and then pulled it back down.

 

‘Oops, I didn’t mean to. I shouldn’t do that, it’s like I’m trying to be too friendly.’

 

Evan’s gaze slid down to my hand. I thought I was mistaken, he looked a little wistful.

 

He quickly composes himself and pulls away with difficulty.

 

“I need to ask you something.”

 

“Sure, feel free to ask.”

 

“Is it true? When you said you were friends…”

 

“With Adrian?”

 

“Yes, with… him… with the Master…”

 

I nodded.

 

“You might not believe it, but it’s true. We were friends before he became the Master, and I haven’t seen him since he became the Master of the tower because I’ve been… sick.”

 

For a moment, I wondered what I could say to explain why I hadn’t seen him for so long, so I told him as briefly as I could.

 

“I see…”

 

Evan nodded, but he didn’t seem to like it.

 

The next question would be, if he was a friend, why did he forcibly capture me?

 

Anyway, his question came out of nowhere, breaking my expectation that we would talk about an unintentional misunderstanding.

 

“Even after what he did?”

 

“What?”

 

It wasn’t so much a question as it was a statement of unguarded sincerity.

 

When our eyes met, I could see Evan’s fluttering pupils.

 

“The… earrings.”

 

“Uh…”

 

Evan hesitated for a moment, then spoke with determination.

 

I hadn’t expected him to be so blunt. At my stunned expression, Evan looked and sounded concerned.

 

“Do you have any idea what kind of magic is involved?”

 

How could I not know if I’d gotten it directly from Adrian?

 

“Of course.”

 

Even if using this magic would leave me dead, even if I knew I shouldn’t.

 

Still, the things I could never give up made me this way.

 

‘It’s a product of my greed, but…’ 

 

All the things I wanted to accomplish, even if it meant failing.

 

To be strong, to escape, to survive, to stop the war from happening.

 

‘No, there’s still time to fix it.’ 

 

And even if it was corrupt magic, I don’t think it was Adrian’s fault. Rather, I feel sorry for him.

 

But I hadn’t thought about how it would look to others.

 

“Did he force you to take it…”

 

“No.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I know the misunderstanding.”

 

“Misunderstanding?”

 

If greed was a sin, then of course I should take all the punishment.

 

So any misunderstanding Adrian has or might receive should be my responsibility to clear up, no matter what.

 

Even if I have to let go of that desire, because his concession belongs to me now.

 

“Yeah, I got it because I wanted it.”

 

The words were meant to reassure Evan, but he just looked sad.

 

“…Bella, are you sure you know what’s happening to you?”

 

“You mean my heart isn’t beating?”

 

“…”

 

“Of course, I didn’t want this to happen, it’s just a side effect. Thanks for your concern, but I’m really fine.”

 

“Why, why did you have to…!”

 

Rowan, who had been looking away, seemingly uninterested in Evan’s rising tone, turned his head in our direction.

 

Before answering, I smiled.

 

To make my words sound credible and confident.

 

“Because I can’t let anyone die, not me, not anyone around me.”

 

So that not an ounce of sadness could be detected.

 

“…”

 

“It was the best thing I could do, because I wanted to keep everyone alive.”

 

It was the only way I could become stronger, not having the amount of mana I was born with.