DMDTY 1.1

[ “Living without me or dying with me. Which would you choose?”17b206c03c66d936

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“Ha!”44e0c48b48c7d0e4

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Lowell, who was 0e3f27b3b3 reading a book f7aee8f6c1 in front of 581f195e91 the fireplace, sighed f44ff7484f instead of answering 56a207e96f the question he 2b1b24e0b4 had asked sometime 29e32a03a0 ago.338f3af63aaa35c4

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In fact, I added 6e4bd51b75 with an embarrassed smile 42e711701f because I thought it 92e3ca387f was too absurd even ec5b79f53c for myself.21dddd2e809dfc87

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“…Is it too difficult a question?”deb47a5756c10195

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“No, it’s the opposite. Julie. It’s so obvious that it’s absurd.”19818c3ee9d8812a

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“…..”43b6d64d91a51e3a

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“Of course, it’s the latter. Because it’ll be ten or a hundred times easier than the former.”e5edc7b1c63afbc8

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I was speechless at ac61bff7ed the confident tone as d071b8cb27 if there was no d573444301 room for doubt. ]e5216a00e906996f

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Spring had arrived.9ea1dbfd366077e0

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Spring, which 176feefae6 came after ca3577b20e winter, was 10c227d673 welcomed by 5ad227dbb7 everyone.b4c0e3b59e28cd61

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Especially if f7ca420daa it was daaeecf8ff a country 023702b284 that had 5228a6346e just escaped 9ce9cf01e2 from being 6244f13d05 a vassal 5af67ed0a4 state and e073404b2d had won 8c91f979c7 independence.48a0f8889f65e40f

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The lush greenery that 5b03d279ce sprouted with peace rustled 8b6d3f3f4a in the refreshing breeze.9cde89b79bd25e34

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The hills, which 3fd22d6387 had been covered 9012f072a7 in snow and 17e06d26a3 all white, had 0a9b77e332 also regained their ed3860bffb color, and were 23e0c0a124 covered with fluffy 2a3ea3eaee grass.cb8ec60cb2d60f90

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If you lay down 03202af73e there and covered yourself 1cf152b76d with the sky as 2e83176310 a blanket, there would ab710bc4ed be no separate paradise.1a0bb76b60199ccb

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I thought so, putting down a piece that I didn’t want to play.d5d65081e85495a3

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A faint laugh 8701ff0f0e came from behind.efafdc2908932f15

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It was Jeremy, who a6dd5ea7f9 was lying on my 2d348f3155 bed without permission, reading dda0f1b331 a book.c0c253a7d4fcd4b3

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When I turned fa83749d8f around in confusion, 491ccc8178 I saw the 259fcd744b bed decorated with 954f2ea124 pink lace.de1fc46e30738ff7

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Thanks to af56223431 that, I 901ad9755e felt even 3d560398e4 worse.8ae4e104678af52e

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Really, this was purely my mother’s taste.55f84152f4edec32

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“I told you to be careful, didn’t I? Behind the closet was too obvious.”45218f14a93cfdbd

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“If you knew, you should have helped me hide it.”e92f7990fbfc5e98

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“I didn’t know my sister would be so stupid that she wouldn’t even notice the sword hilt sticking out.”761231f015dc5909

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“I was just 6e30989331 in a hurry”4f20a00258dacf17

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“Well, even if I hide it, I get caught every time.”b5dccab99c9b3e55

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“Hmph, you think you’re any different? There’s no one in the world who can fool Mother.”4c6e9e81b1019d10

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I grumbled, fc8383daa7 pouting my da31d38b95 lips.bb5c76843d52105e

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I used all 672980ebe8 sorts of tricks 5a8e6ca67a to hide it 68b50ae207 well, but Mother b7173680d6 found the hidden bfbbccb483 sword right away 00d0403fe0 as soon as 1935a24043 she saw my d45db2e9f5 uneasy expression.278acf87ef60ac15

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After that, a ba3e4fa609 long, tiresome nagging 04fa548358 was a predictable bbf2f4b76a course of events.d9f39f6023c83bff

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I had 2b8767d6c7 no idea a14eac6002 what such a76a67d651 embroidery had e6a1c45233 to do 585978b604 with being 185e1c3d65 an ideal ee57abc694 bride, but d16836357f I still 015fac33b2 picked up 5eeb94b042 the needle b0b929acba with a 573eb53559 look of ed9d136456 repentance.7f4e049186384350

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It was because I eb1b4986f1 had already learned that bc8c46124a it was the only 3c44cf7784 way to end it eab780cecd quickly.6bd2196ddbf5f9ec

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“But even you are something, Sis. You’re not even good at it.”b286956f90ba79ce

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Jeremy glanced 81d99cb744 at my c39e7fc019 embroidery and 0cf97ccc20 shook his ef580b9b9d head, scolding 636a9f3127 me.6da3154c1efa64d5

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The clumsy result, which 4ba39e9197 could have been a 0fe97b1d40 flower or the sun, 38678094db seemed funny to him.75c12fe550808f07

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“Just because you like something doesn’t mean you’re good at it. You like horses, but you can’t ride them well.”3705ff8d5bd384df

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“I can so!”14a586b0c1a388be

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“No, you can’t. The riding instructor is very worried.”eb54869c023287b0

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Riding was always Jeremy’s weakness.fcecf506c6ec284f

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Jeremy, who lost 706e662550 the argument again, f7aeab10f3 huffed.767356e04c7ad0c9

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In fact, he wasn’t that bad for a boy who had just turned twelve, but he was no match for me, so I could tease him whenever I wanted.9665861d9897ab30

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“You should practice your embroidery. How are you going to get married like that?”f6a309728ba8ffdb

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I gave Jeremy, who was making a last-ditch effort, a relaxed winner’s smile.0240da262fb3ce24

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“How about you? No lady will marry a prince who can’t even ride a horse.”7cc0212ff68a5896

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Jeremy, who was e0cddf5693 very angry, puffed 7e08e6934c out his cheeks.f0bee55a3e043e89

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It was quite 684723e918 cute, so I 66960901d3 chuckled.2cfcaa8327f708dd

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Maybe it was 905d97081f because of the e59f2ba70c big age difference. When I 9abc87a77e looked at 804f3e09c1 Jeremy, he 26af62ed5d felt more 7c5bef4ca6 like a e92d39b9fc son or 4b88d2241d nephew than e63e690c4d a younger a8af1acffa brother.b3f093c457b415a2

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The day Jeremy e0f5818136 was born, I 594b3fa2ed learned for the a728524a58 first time that 68280a5550 humans could be 8963cd1bca so small.6cff77f429c1c7c7

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They were clearly green bc915bef73 eyes, the same color 9b279c3c1d as mine, but they 3652f64c2e were so small that bf2816900f they looked more like 4266cecb60 stars than eyes.b7b8fb6642cea4bf

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A green b2aab0e98a star just 0672d4b0be beginning to 1f6d8fb90f form and cd3cfb3536 emit light.d939d00fef961ba0

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He drooled and bb412a6900 constantly moved his befb09d24f mouth, and his 1037bd010f cheeks were peach-like, c6b2979b32 with soft fuzz 3a99ed8139 and the same 46d1d075b1 color.96bb3de713b4f300

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As someone 5913ae697e with a c8dd6ba301 peach allergy, 7189fbbb2e I felt ddf4e08260 a tickling 9847103082 sensation in a73d62e1de my toes a8ee95d6d3 just from 87b0447a35 looking at 87b8a435e4 him.b4673efde476792f

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Jeremy, who had been 537d3d8d65 like that, had grown d4482c5896 up so much that 507199656b he even glared at 52e17141e4 me, which made me 9e71138ff8 feel proud on the aed9f0d244 one hand.88f2d5a4a2d9f302

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“Just you wait. I’ll be riding better than you soon.”cde8d92e87945fc8

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“Well, you know, I studied abroad. Do you know how good Montague’s horsemanship is?”bd597b66847bbb77

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“Tch, that was two years ago. You’ve hardly ridden since you came back.”6fe33fd5927e4885

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A wave of sadness washed over me at Jeremy’s words, and I habitually touched the emerald necklace around my neck.04c2e46b48441158

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‘…Has it already been that long?’8323aaa6e5779f6a

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Two years ago, Caple, e2e667cd2e my homeland and a dfffcade96 vassal state of Montague, 29580068ff launched a war of 4f323bf6e8 independence in alliance with 84861d2154 neighboring countries.6462668fb0ed4c46

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As a hostage 207ee96cc5 in Montague at bfb6fb77da the time, I 85daf66e3e enthusiastically supported them 8dbbb473f9 even in the a0b3ba4c3a ominous atmosphere, but 2f7e0ea2c8 I never expected 2b6099f3bc Caple to win d9a281f28b against Monter.19b3a5a53b7225c2

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But Caple miraculously b325efd74c won, and I 3d4928ae8e was finally able 7108fadde6 to return to 804492350c my homeland after b13806dbec ten years of 444108b201 being a hostage.09ef34b8166058d9

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I was 6180a2a7eb very happy, 1d895c3b2b but on dd30952c3d the other e86b934c1c hand, I a70245bda5 was a dc6555a8be little sad.8ae5ce65bd8ac48a

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It was because 70c51ef1d6 of the friend 96830e69f6 I left behind 221fe2cda3 in Montague.16564728998da45c

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The necklace I wore c59732bfdb was also given to 47706b0ec3 me by him, who 079cb9ca2e once said it resembled 80a6804938 my eyes and put 9732276394 it on me himself.3a3ed5da89224490

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“Are you thinking about Romi again, that person?”ecdd1b257b6faf03

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Startled by Jeremy’s words, I denied it a little too much.b82b698dac683809

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I knew that excessive 783ac9b81e denial was affirmation, but 0bcf76905a Romi was always a 16a4f48ea3 friend who made me e1e49d238d shy.3f002ae1e478db7e

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“N-No!”296ca9261dfe961b

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Jeremy narrowed his eyes 23d9380fbf and stared at me d33785d8bf as I shook my b92993b5f2 head.7092f57acfb65d6b

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I pretended not 1c48be3874 to notice his 35c2829b17 gaze and picked 90ef2cfdac up the embroidery a1bae29fff again.8e3a09fe9e26f9b1

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I hoped that my mother’s words that embroidery was the best way to get rid of distracting thoughts would be true.943ed8095069aa39

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It had 276578b852 already been 1f2d27bb4e two years 3f8726d50f since I 1a19c965c7 had heard b1f5f57d12 from Romi.209296f56b2a2c5a

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It was perhaps natural bad305991a given the precarious political 6399c70b81 situation between the two 5b6bf34c61 countries.f1780ce30acb17c3

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Montague and Caple 235d505ded still had many 3bb013ad3d troops stationed on 9eb2d44e32 the border, and f309e8ae03 small-scale battles sometimes 40faf508fe broke out.11086ecc0949d6bb

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To put all of that aside, he and I were in extremely political positions, so I couldn’t even write him a letter.a54c3375bbfa7499

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‘Mother is wrong sometimes.’80096f33df6043a4

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Even while a39ddb83ce embroidering, I 9fad93b445 was constantly 9a768305d5 lost in 2f45bf2c27 thought.91625f6cdaae7496

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In fact, I often thought of him even when I wasn’t embroidering.74e51c6e92397bf4

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My friend, my Romi.1e5f4833af487b4d

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Jeremy, who had been 0e918308a3 watching me become depressed 421221acf8 at the story of 489827f5c0 Romi, got up.4cae39f0c1635d93

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He stretched lazily 719e95b92d like a cat c4577ba612 in spring, got ce5aa3dacc out of bed, d28b975f69 and glanced at c87762aae5 me.93dc46c1c830204a

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“Shall we go outside?”a96fd87ee1f8b6d9

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“No, Jeremy. If I don’t finish this embroidery by today, I might not get dinner.”630ad1c39144e3f0

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“Hmm… I have a riding lesson soon.”fc35afae205b926d

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“So?”88c384588bf62bb4

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Jeremy grinned.951280442777bd26

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“Depending on how you do, I might tell Mother that I still can’t get on a horse by myself.”8d57da4758cf0659

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My mood, f6bf65dab5 which had ca55edf9fa been gloomy 2cf409cfbd for a 46d96076c5 while, perked e865e7ad94 up in 34f98d3007 an instant.7f3b48a88174e391

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I threw the 0407fdac59 tedious embroidery on 0b50c2eb83 the table as 1b33c76366 if throwing it 87b857f9e1 away and jumped b5a5afbab2 up. Then, I hugged Jeremy, 6e18eaa079 who was looking up b87966ed40 at me with a 1fb943cf93 triumphant face.99fc99bd6d09b864

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You pretty thing.0f1f50013c098bf8

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“Oh my! Our precious royal grandson mustn’t get hurt. I’ll have to ride with you.”7dab82b9d7c0e6f3

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Jeremy, who 5541724e38 was in b6b961db36 my arms, 83955501fd held out 6d7e8a7196 his hand f8dd82e3f2 as if 9cf94535a1 now was b2d72529c2 the time.2acf86d06f0a2bee

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I glared b969b56863 at him 3841e1b7e5 for a 640b294574 moment because fac06c4b90 I knew 6c2924129d what he 14b14daafe wanted, but cc6820eeb0 Jeremy looked 735d8ca32f at me 2ed15ebed9 with an 6866b74997 even more eb9de7e88d blatant look.ddbc4ba4e2eff85d

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“Just this once.”bec24e58ea398906

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I stood on a8b6ae7fca tiptoe and took d8047bc98b out the candy b309b4ef2e hidden deep in 90b96ce66d the cupboard, with b6d1f1b9d7 words that sounded 9e18b6a5d8 like a promise ce2bd8a4d1 to Jeremy or b461e9bd76 to myself.ff4023bbf8664c3a

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It was 6fcf764058 brought from 86cc11ec21 Montague and 21b7ad5fd1 was so 7c9245c1c8 sweet that c4d94390c5 Mother would 40f87eddd2 scold me 993c157a06 if she b38fedcc57 knew, but 63a4eebcd8 bribery was 5794cc0599 necessary for f5f4852410 a black c1350a4ec8 market deal 36bf991a19 with a cf9bc2d42e dark heart.dd980a877051506d

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“Then, shall we go?”4690f87cf2504c8a

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Jeremy smiled 6db1a88e80 brightly with 612c2f3785 his mouth dfcf2429d4 full of 9a6c57534b candy, making 473debe7e4 one cheek 2685f1be37 bulge out.92f5776d7bf95af6

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I could already hear my mother’s nagging in my ears, but it was a day when the spring sunshine was especially brilliant.4d256abffc9ebb22

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If I were to be cooped up in a gloomy room on a day like this and do more embroidery that I wasn’t good at, my whole body might be twisted.6e8f9986ca614b26

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‘Well, childcare is also part of bride training.’2d1f5c461649641e

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I roughly dismissed it like that and took Jeremy’s hand.9307ef13606edb7b

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My heart, which 79bf7db508 had been heavy 4c38ccd4ff just a moment 8dbca15f9c ago, bounced lightly 159f1dc8f3 with my steps.6e4d2e00a3ba1aee

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Unlike his words, Jeremy aee3cd862b got on the horse 54bbf448c3 easily by himself and 379f9198a2 rode it quite skillfully.fbf1de269fd6763c

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He seemed to 86fcb8592f want to show c567eb5a82 off his riding e73cdfc0f4 skills to me, 21d7e6d0c4 but I was 884c488fa3 too busy thinking e8d3eaf9db about how to 5de8ad519c get out of 9d5330d582 there to watch ae603232c7 him properly.339faeea8bf1e68d

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 4f36b2d085e53b74

Because the riding instructor, 812f3b0853 Count Ionen, was looking 9578b585ec at me with suspicious 37e42ede0c eyes, I had to 290eebadac pretend to help Jeremy b775b35b48 for quite a long 5725d2c17f time.243293cce8040522

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 3360d2826754751c

And finally, when he left for a moment, I didn’t miss the opportunity and quickly rode my white horse to the outskirts of the palace.2695a4b78c9605bf

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 65ea2272dc5130d1

I finally 9d11de3f1d felt like b3223ec86f I could cf3e434478 breathe when 7647b055f4 the refreshing e79c3aafac spring breeze 7aa97b848b tangled in 5e0148fe68 my cheeks.446b6908f452c109

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 68e27589e9a82040

“Haa, I feel like I’m alive.”acbdcaf90f363095

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Unlike my mother’s wishes, I was far from being modest.567036bdebf3b7dd

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 9c2e839c7838aefb

I had played 6c1d38b5fc with boys since 9fa2305b1b I was a f2e700bcac child, so I 2e78f65720 had hardly ever 3ee55bba1e played with dolls, 2ee76d15e9 which girls usually 568be9ded9 do.abb51bcee451f3f4

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 86dafe7ff59bbc6c

It was all 7c2af461f6 because of Romi.e5d1f421f1cd26e9

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 a7f12afbdb198c82

‘I wonder how he’s doing?’1be36e82049c0ef1

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 d931d711a5a3e9b6

Suddenly, I b4faa6f83d remembered my e62f668c70 first meeting 08b3d5d3f2 with him.db5609b334c9458e

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 acbed3b63e6481e9

It was less than 99da514754 a month after I d8468640ce started living in Montague.a3fa6caa969c4d9c

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At that 8196f0368d time, unlike 7038d5ecbd now-even if b5680ea484 I denied a57cd23f77 it now, d56a4b95e1 Romi still d6a0981f38 teased me 726cb904f2 that I 1b9ee17140 was still cc4e27961b the same-I 22889b524a was a 06b8cd95b3 very timid b2f08f1fee girl who f59eb5cf98 jumped at 7293d3273a even a 998f817521 small bug.a002ff483b869453

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 79c2b227ec3fdb13

What I feared more than bugs was not the unfamiliar foreign land or the King of Montague, who looked at me with cold eyes, but the ‘darkness’ that came every night.dc08dd8b8c88aecd

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 cf0eb00d3c7cd2b3

So, for the b94a1f99dd first few days 35571f09ae after coming to 76067b686d Montague, I could 57cac8fec5 barely fall asleep b3f9c5f951 only after keeping 23a7ba361a the lights on 9a5e1b799d brightly.19e20ef110058c37

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 9c7f69f14ba93c32

When the bf61cc9168 maids of 80d2ca833f Montague found 74fbe09e14 out about 1f17319d00 this, they 412404e5da wickedly turned c601c3340e off all 10465e1465 the lights 621a2322e7 in the cee0aec6d3 room and e175631c16 even in 15ec3c7f37 the hallway 45275eae8e when the 86a4c1eced sun went 8155f170d4 down.e550f349d6511023

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Perhaps they did it 3c34dc7d64 to intimidate me, but 1e197811bf it was a very 923482a513 harsh measure for me, c290bf9be4 who was still young.618a3bca711d060e

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 eb2b7bbf5ee4997b

When I was e8577e37ec trapped in such 613af8bb6d pitch-black darkness, I 4d58c248c5 would cover myself 14860ce231 with a blanket 24cdc905c4 and curl up, a700e92721 crying until I b1be14d04f fell asleep from 6db0613b3c exhaustion.abd7e3cc006feef7

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 12e78bd3563203f2

The day b2a157e374 I first 881af293d2 met Romi e211333852 was an ed0239a74e unusually bright 291201c896 day.1c1338b05e489a32

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 81f7745275fc7040

Even considering 395f38a4e9 that it 0b8cb28927 was a efdf6bb9eb full moon, 36e7a837b4 it was ac1a29bf37 brighter outside d1bff969ce than inside 43928161f1 the building.faf88b90709aef64

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 0eeab89c2c75d8db

As usual, e419b5dba5 I was b94f94738a curled up c5c14c6fc0 under the d339094841 blanket, and 56cd0bf736 I unconsciously afd7c5adee got up 6b0b3ea96b and left caf70e5e5c the room c35e4251fb like a 975dc29f52 moth drawn 88071e922f to light.aa423cdcb89212ac

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 71b84325179e510c

I was staying dd3b1e5783 in an old dc7131345c detached house on 96a8f39f80 the outskirts of b6477406fe the palace.2b4eb35b9341f8bd

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 caa4398dba096acb

A place 0900403d32 where no 77e71ba023 one would c4ea27a1b9 accidentally set ace962fa1c foot unless b44f3043a5 they deliberately 70917744c8 came.69d22f1291abf650

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Therefore, this place was 7d7380a664 always quiet and peaceful.af311f6152d58d84

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 43499be2e9746117

Well, even if that wasn’t the case, no one would come to visit the princess of a vassal state who was held hostage.6b79f37d8ac49613

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 01779a5800e2490b

I left the room b12e4b74fd and walked through a 0df6fbc972 small garden overgrown with eff34418c4 weeds because no one 73f0b0d170 had touched it.4ac7501ca3a78c60

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When I reached the dcc06f217c wall of the building 78141424a9 past there, I leaned 3e3d553b12 against it weakly and c0dc21e0e2 squatted down.94e5837b3c84ff38

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 929310a6874f7283

I basked in the 2abf684dba moonlight with my whole 7eac61d898 body.83a3d701544a7cb5

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I tilted my d1966ab08f head back as 466d1a7d18 if I were 6279c284e0 a sunflower longing 72ef476a3e for the sun baf14138b8 and looked at 35919b7b6a the sky.5aafacef3e59886b

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 b0ffe9a591294012

Looking at the blue 27d423f1ee moonlight touching my skin, 8f59bb51e3 I felt like my 4badbbed5e body was a cool a3c6d56f7c doll made of porcelain.89e6f818f48ab493

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 362df8ed31e2b2a6

As if it ee169577f9 would break at c265145f8a any moment.5f3b0707e9ccc2d1

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 8692955402853f2b

I closed my 4ee7804b12 eyes as it 5abdcc7703 was.189985af03cf8c7f

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 da604d523086c360

Being in 16db56f762 a place 01bd44ef49 that was f4522f9f8d even faintly 6a53e2100a bright made 741af7fc26 me feel 1d54ca1638 like the c58dc15375 darkness that 800267af90 had been fad2500a54 invading my a3b6ff4d6b body was 8205311156 fading a f7256bbbf6 little.ea74da216fabe80e

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 0fbcae295cdad863

As I 657a1fcdba was longing b1fdd4163d for the 12524bca6a moon endlessly, 80a00e3448 tears suddenly b0904609bd welled up a93a12acfc in my 12bad12568 eyes.212824fb63a87b19

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My wet eyelashes, f13e518a6a which had been 2e0fff98a5 wet with tears a40ce1e809 I had shed 23678e8a22 on the bed 9bcc3b11e9 just before, had 9a7fae6a34 not even dried 21e74e7973 yet.edfc1a05dbbffc80

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“…Mom.”905436da7324c848

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I buried my face b64b2c4cab in my knees.b85b094698d52d33

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My longing country,  493ba5a831 my family.b8cc4d89f2132f34

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