CU Ch 0.2

The clock struck 9 p.m. sharp as Solgae arrived back at the clinic. He checked the time at the door before stepping inside. The waiting room was silent. It was natural that there would be no patients at this hour, but even the nurses were absent.

‘This is strange. Wasn’t it supposed to be 9 p.m. tonight?’

As he furrowed his brows, the door to the examination room opened, and the same doctor from earlier came out and smiled brightly at Solgae.

“You’ve arrived.”

“Yes. But are you alone?”

“Yes? Ah, the nurses. I told them to go home. I can handle the surgery on my own. This way, please.”

Solgae followed the doctor’s lead.

“…….”

“Please lie down here.”

The place the doctor pointed to was a bed. Solgae looked around. It looked like an operating room, but something felt off. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but he had a bad feeling. 

Having grown up in the rough-and-tumble world of organized crime, he had developed a keen sense of danger, and that sense was strangely tingling now. It wasn’t the kind of danger that came with a rival gang’s attack, but an unsettling feeling persisted.

As Solgae, frowning, stared at the bed and stood still, the doctor asked curiously,

“Is there something wrong?”

“…….”

“If you’ve changed your mind….”

“No, I haven’t.”

Letting out a short sigh, Solgae lay flat on the bed and stared at the ceiling. It seemed his bad feeling was due to his worries about the surgery. Though going under the knife was nothing, it was hard not to be nervous given the area being operated on even for someone as stoic as him.

‘It’s for the boss. A slightly smaller dick is something I can endure.’

As Solgae reassured himself, the doctor bustled about.

“Then I’ll administer the anesthetic.”

As soon as the words left the doctor’s mouth, Solgae’s clear consciousness gradually faded, and soon darkness descended. He wasn’t sure how long he was out, but he was jolted awake by something repeatedly slapping his cheek.

“Mr. Kang Jugeon?! Mr. Kang Jugeon?!”

“Stop… hitting me.”

Frowning, Solgae opened his eyes.

“Are you awake?”

The doctor took a step back from the operating table, or rather, the bed, and chuckled softly.

“Yes. Is the surgery over?”

“Yes. It’s finished. Very, very… successfully.”

The doctor’s face was flushed as he answered with a smile. He was breathing heavily, as if excited. Solgae, his face contorted in a grimace, slowly sat up. He looked down to see his naked lower body. It seemed the doctor had only removed his pants for the surgery.

“It doesn’t… look much different.”

His genitals between his legs throbbed and ached, but he didn’t feel much smaller. Solgae tilted his head, examining his penis, which seemed darker than usual.

“That can’t be. It must be your imagination.”

Strange. It really didn’t feel any different. But there was no reason for the doctor to lie to him. It really must be his imagination.

“How much did you reduce it by?”

“Exactly 1.1cm. 1cm isn’t much. It’s a minuscule difference in reality. That’s why it doesn’t feel like you’ve had surgery.”

Is that so? That must be it. 

Solgae nodded and got off the bed, putting his pants on. The jeans rubbed against his genitals, causing a stinging sensation.

“It hurts a little.”

“It won’t last long. Please come back tomorrow night so I can check on your progress.”

“I have to come back again?”

At Solgae’s question, the doctor nodded as if it were obvious.

“You’ll need to come for a few days. Coming at night, like today, would be best. If 9 p.m. is too late, 8 p.m., or even 7:30 p.m. is fine.”

Solgae clicked his tongue. Having to come every day was bothersome. But if the doctor said so, he had to come. If it were anywhere else, it might be different, but problems with his penis would be a real disaster.

“Alright. I’ll come back tomorrow then. I’ll come at 9 p.m. like today.”

After paying for the surgery in cash and leaving the clinic, the doctor saw him out to the entrance.

“Please be sure to come tomorrow.”

The doctor urged him to return, grinning and showing his teeth. He even waved as if seeing off a close friend. He was a rather strange doctor, but he was kind in his own way.

‘It seems like a decent clinic. I should tell my men to come to this clinic if they ever need to see a urologist.’

Thinking this, Solgae left the clinic.

“Mr. Kang Jugeon!”

At the sound of his name, Solgae’s eyes snapped open. He was greeted by the now familiar ceiling—he was at the clinic. 

Hmm. 

He let out a small sigh and turned his gaze to see the doctor, his expression slightly flushed as usual, standing there. Perhaps the treatment was strenuous, or maybe it was something else, but the doctor always seemed flushed, as if he’d just run a race, whenever Solgae regained consciousness.

“…….”

“Please come out when you’re awake.”

The doctor smiled brightly at the now-conscious Solgae and went outside first. Solgae got off the bed and adjusted his pants, which had slid down to his knees. He felt a slight sting as his penis brushed against the fabric. Zipping up, Solgae clicked his tongue.

It was the fourth day since his surgery. As expected of a surgery on the most sensitive part of the body, the pain lingered for long. He’d thought it would be gone in two or three days. Moreover, the sensation of pain was peculiar. It was distinctly different from the pain of being stabbed or having a broken arm. It wasn’t a sharp, stinging pain, but rather, a… how could he describe it? It was a sweet kind of pain, although that might sound ridiculous.

“Aren’t you coming out?”

The doctor called from the other room, seemingly wondering why Solgae wasn’t coming out.

“I’m… coming out now.”

When he stepped out of the room, the doctor held out a paper cup. He looked inside and saw it was coffee. 

Solgae didn’t particularly enjoy coffee, but it was hard to refuse, looking at the doctor’s beaming face. He silently took the coffee and downed it in one gulp. The hot, bitter, and slightly sweet liquid burned its way down his throat, making him grimace.

His face, already intimidating even when relaxed, became even more so when he frowned. Most people would flinch at this, but the doctor in front of him remained unfazed. In fact, he seemed to find it amusing that Solgae had downed the coffee as if it were poison, his face breaking into a wide smile. He didn’t seem to find Solgae’s face intimidating in the slightest.

“Oh, by the way, Mr. Kang Jugeon, I found this in your pants.”

“…….”

The doctor held out a neatly folded yellow piece of paper. It was a talisman¹Solgae had received before the surgery, hoping to alleviate some of the pain. Solgae took the talisman and shoved it roughly into his pants pocket.

“It looks like a talisman. Do you believe in superstitions?”

“I’m a moderate believer.”

Solgae’s gang members tended to believe in talismans and shamans².

“What kind of talisman is it?”

“…It’s a pain reduction talisman.”

“…Excuse me?”

“I received it before the surgery, hoping it would lessen the pain.”

At Solgae’s deadpan response, the doctor, momentarily stunned, started to burts into laughter, bending over. Solgae stared expressionlessly as the doctor’s face turned red from laughter. His fair skin made the flush especially prominent.

“This is hilarious! A pain reduction talisman,” the doctor said, wiping beneath his eyes with his index finger. 

Solgae then asked,

“Aren’t you afraid of me?”

The doctor, having finally stopped laughing, tilted his head.

“Not really… should I be afraid of you, Mr. Kang Jugeon?”

“People usually get scared when they see my face.”

The doctor finally seemed to understand, nodding as he said, “Ah.”

“I’m used to seeing intimidating faces, so it’s alright.”

“Used to?”

“Yes. Compared to the faces I’ve seen, Mr. Kang Jugeon could be considered handsome.”

Solgae stared intently at the doctor. He momentarily wondered what kind of faces the doctor had seen to consider him handsome. If anyone else had said, “You’re handsome,” to Solgae, he would have punched them in the mouth for lying, but strangely, the doctor’s words made him feel rather pleased.

Solgae crumpled the empty paper cup and tossed it into the trash can, then checked the time. It was past ten o’clock. The treatment was over, so it was time to go home.

As Solgae stood up, the doctor also rose.

“Mr. Kang Jugeon.”

“….?”

Solgae, who had been walking toward the exit, stopped and turned to look at the doctor.

“Gangsters usually have nicknames, right? Do you have one, Mr. Kang Jugeon?”

The doctor’s question seemed a bit out of the blue, but Solgae saw no reason to hide it, so he answered,

“They call me Solgae.”

Solgae (솔개) means “kite” or “black kite (bird of prey)” in Korean.

“Solgae… It suits you.”

“But I’d prefer if you called me by my real name.”

His real name, which had felt awkward and unfamiliar, as if he were borrowing someone else’s, was now quite comfortable to hear. Moreover, he felt a strange sense of satisfaction when the doctor called his name. So he wanted the doctor to call him Kang Jugeon, not Solgae.

At Solgae’s words, the doctor’s eyes widened slightly before he offered a farewell.

“Have a safe trip.”

Solgae nodded in response to the doctor’s farewell and left the clinic. His subordinate, Jebi, who had been waiting outside, quickly approached. 

“Did something good happen, hyung-nim³?” 

“No.”

“But you look very happy. It feels like it’s been a while since I’ve seen you smile, hyung-nim.”

“I’m smiling?”

“Yes. Look at this.”

Jebi angled the rearview mirror toward Solgae. Solgae leaned down and looked in the mirror. He saw his own face, his lips curved into a smile. Solgae stared for a moment at his unfamiliar, smiling face before getting into the car. Jebi straightened the rearview mirror and quickly got into the driver’s seat, then started the car.

Solgae leaned back in his seat, his eyes closed, and chuckled occasionally.

‘He’s not afraid of me?’

He thought of the doctor’s words—not only was he not scary, but he was handsome—and he felt another chuckle rising. Of course, the doctor had meant handsome compared to the thugs he’d seen, but he still didn’t feel bad about it. Swallow kept glancing back at him, seemingly fascinated by this unusual display.

“Jebi.”

“Yes, hyung-nim.”

“Focus on driving.”

The ant-like glances finally ceased. But only for a moment. Unable to bear the silence, Jebi spoke again.

“Solgae hyungnim. I think you like the doctor at the clinic you’re going to. You always seem especially happy after visiting. You’ve also been smiling frequently lately, even though you barely smile once a year.”

Jebi was being noisy.

Solgae closed his eyes tighter, ignoring his subbordinate’s chatter. 

However, what Jebi said wasn’t entirely wrong. He quite… liked the doctor. As Solgae was lost in thought about the doctor, the car pulled up in front of his house.