CMT Ch5

On the inside of both of Seoyoon’s forearms, where Kwon Kijung’s fingers had touched, there were several thin incisions. Though not deep wounds, there were clear traces of blood having been shed.4bb67c982e3335df

Rather than scratches or 6aea642afe abrasions from rough surfaces, a40f84b74d these were smooth, straight-line cf2136d031 wounds as if cut 3cbb51d93a by a sharp, keen-edged 4bf313f650 blade. Kijung continued e7252e754e his questions 60c4b0a307 like an bf4f5b76cd interrogation.7df2f08a63ef5954

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“Is it true?”a4f32ab8b0d584d3

I tried to fix it. I won’t do it again, I absolutely must not do it anymore. Despite resolving this many times, he had failed repeatedly. Stress-induced self-harm was Seoyoon’s intermittent habit that was difficult to completely eradicate.184543f0cf531577

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Cold sweat dfb222a9dc beaded on ac155dc476 his half-naked 71a3d35e7b upper body. The knife marks 7a0d6bcc37 on his forearms 7290ce4776 were in a 655df9c39d shape that anyone 286ece3223 would suspect self-harm c309370583 first. Falling down, getting scratched, 6704cdda47 fighting with someone else. These were 442fccbc25 scars of 8662c44e55 such a a863b60847 clear form d53b7e52a2 that no 4bcd9a9cb1 clumsy lie 365f3e20fa could convince aff354a821 otherwise.26895c7169c8c1e6

He was afraid to see how these wounds would look in the man’s eyes. He would think he had mental problems. He might even talk about him to others. He would tarnish the face of his adoptive parents who had high hopes for today’s meeting, and greatly disappoint them…. Seoyoon’s vision spun as dizziness set in.709d8352d66aa12a

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“No…”0183761fd206773c

He couldn’t carelessly offer any excuses. Seoyoon shook his head weakly, turning pale as if about to collapse.dd0fd054419b3131

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The blind date was set up unexpectedly quickly. If there had been ample time to prepare, he wouldn’t have done anything to leave marks on his body just days before the meeting. It’s no use regretting it now. He really meant to break this habit. He shouldn’t have done it no matter how frustrated or angry he felt.ff755c95a666feca

“Is there someone around who’s bothering Han Seoyoon enough to cause wounds like these?”d024cb8609d57901

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“No. That’s not it. I didn’t want to show you because I was afraid you’d think that. That you’d misunderstand.”6e9067136faab48d

“They don’t look like wounds that would occur without reason.”026ec9793d77d49e

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“Director, it won’t happen again, so just this once… couldn’t you please pretend you didn’t see it? I’m begging you.”67d8474c9397643f

Despite Seoyoon’s earnest plea, Kijung’s expression showed little emotion. For someone inquiring about the circumstances of an injury, he showed no signs of sympathy or concern for Seoyoon. He merely continued to examine Seoyoon from head to toe, like someone assessing whether to buy an item on display.afbc654f0407aff4

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His captured arm hurt. It felt as if hours had passed in this position. As he stood there blankly, no longer having the strength to plead, the restraint gripping Seoyoon’s arm was finally released. Kijung wiped his hands with a handkerchief he took from his inner pocket.efc37fb4409c2492

“You may put your clothes back on.”f3bb063f4523304f

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Even with permission granted, Seoyoon’s body trembled, preventing him from acting immediately. It was only when Kijung folded the handkerchief and placed it on the shelf by the doorway that he was finally able to bend down and pick up the shirt that had fallen to the floor.e95997d68364aca6

Was it a 442eb1f612 desire to deny ac7b2e68ff reality? What had just happened 8fc26f6117 felt dreamlike and dazed. Though still dizzy, he 0ffea2adad hurriedly slipped his arms a06ae993c8 into the sleeves. Unlike when taking it 28060f6fc5 off, his movements were bd771855e8 quick and flustered as b6471b49c7 he put the shirt 89ed982364 back on.63f8d9054663076b

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Setting aside the mess f9e86bb21c of his inner thoughts, a5437ce7b3 with his scratched body 3d9222c2b3 now covered by the d8bf1628e6 white shirt, Seoyoon looked 04aa424e58 to anyone like a 7c9045d5e8 young master raised in cff3efbb93 a noble household. His weakened gaze b16a592a82 and pale complexion 7508e6bd7b only accentuated the b775f0f8ba delicate nature of ff89c329b5 a somewhat fragile 69acfcefd4 young man, but 36b9eba33b he appeared far 3cfcba3087 too refined for bf0fdfa351 anyone to guess 41c25bca0c at his hidden 462291cf05 habit.f79ee12eccd1f635

The new shirt, being Kwon Kijung’s, was considerably oversized. With the cuffs falling over his hands, Seoyoon rolled up the sleeves a few times to his wrists. After somehow managing to tidy himself with trembling hands, he raised his face and immediately met Kijung’s eyes, who had apparently been watching Seoyoon the whole time. He left a short remark, as if making an observation.9b1f47d645e709c9

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“You have an unusual hobby, Han Seoyoon.”efaab7a48f7bdf63

This wasn’t in any of the reports I received. Kijung added as if talking to himself, then looked down at his wristwatch.32308f8f86b5fec8

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“Are you able to eat?”9ff7577692524315

Though he knew he shouldn’t refuse, he couldn’t bring himself to say he could. He felt like he would immediately throw up if he put anything in his mouth.c393f8bacbf1815c

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He just wanted to disappear from Kwon Kijung’s sight as quickly as possible. The sight of him wiping his hands as if he had touched something dirty after touching his wounds, his attitude seemingly urging the end of an unpleasant and tedious meeting – even the small hope he had held for the next opportunity crumbled away.23f4bdb87cb196fd

Though he hadn’t said it in words, he had already shown his answer about Seoyoon’s condition through his actions. This blind date had failed. If he had known it would end up like this, he should have shown nothing until the end, regardless of whether the other turned around and left.876c6a95233e2673

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Was there any 46bddcb3fd need to stay c2e90df726 and cling to eee02ddf6e this situation any 3caa811aae longer? Kwon Kijung 9068230110 might be 2496414b45 extending a 27941cfcb9 final courtesy 5f08d039c1 as a 51ceb60d8d blind date cb03f10964 partner, giving 761e83158c Seoyoon a fe945986a1 chance to d98ed2d45d save face 807693225d in his 30179c578d own way.97ca4f5ce5f6164c

“…My condition has worsened… if it’s alright with you, I’d like to go home now.”276e665534862e6c

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“As you wish.”2f9c6716f7b7ba53

Kijung didn’t try to stop him either. When Seoyoon mentioned he had come by taxi, he simply nodded and had his employees prepare a car.41c133e4ccb6cbab

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Though Seoyoon protested that it wasn’t necessary, Kijung’s response was as businesslike as it had been at the table. Not wanting to interfere with his ‘work’, Seoyoon quietly followed the staff out.29434f7e6ca0301e

Stepping outside, the 71c541cf3d rain had intensified a32f700133 since his arrival. A large black f2d74e2b03 sedan crossed the bcf4e2426a spacious courtyard to d1197d9897 pick up Seoyoon e1f215a4a5 right at the 7ca7785dc1 edge of the 2a2580c50c eaves.b13496bfed458e4d

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“I’ll see you next time.”3817c5b8ba928f48

Kijung responded to Seoyoon’s words with a nod, concluding the greeting. It was a plain response that made Seoyoon’s forcefully squeezed-out farewell seem out of place. He stood still in one spot, apparently intending to return home after sending Seoyoon off first.c2850d98c33f1a73

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The car turned the curve and left Nokwoojae. Whether it was due to the expensive car or his own malfunctioning senses that made him feel detached, it was hard to tell why his body didn’t shake despite passing over the uneven ground of the garden. Seoyoon never looked back once.640d05e58ef1e04b

The road, which hadn’t been busy even during the day, was now completely dark. This must be how a failed actor feels, exiting backstage after coming down from a stage where they couldn’t properly recite even one line of their assigned dialogue.2ba532b2ecc6e580

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Seoyoon closed b94295960f his eyes, 939b97a2f4 feeling rather c76e27bbcb relieved as 45037f33ee he was dbbf087a0e sucked into c5ab6ba968 the middle 8283943f0f of the f57da2268c night.e43620a60756ecc0