BYBM Chapter 3 (Part 1)

 

3.

Yoo Hyun-jin had terrible luck with draws.

Not long after becoming a deputy priest, he had to draw lots to determine his destination for his mandatory pastoral duties in the provinces.

There were places people wanted to go and places they avoided, so the decision was made by lottery. Yoo Hyun-jin thought that anywhere was fine—anywhere but Pyeonghang.

The chance of drawing Pyeonghang, one of the 24 administrative districts, was 1 in 24.

So he thought it would be fine. And yet—

Yoo Hyun-jin’s destination was decided as Pyeonghang. He inwardly cursed it as a scam, but he had no choice but to comply with the result.

Pyeonghang was where Hyun Tae-oh was. To officially conduct pastoral work, prior approval from the local government was necessary, and this time, a highly significant ritual event was scheduled. There was no way he could avoid seeing that man’s face.

He had barely managed to calm his heart during the four years since he left the capital, yet now he had to see him again. His heart pounded nervously the entire journey to Pyeonghang.

After six years in the seminary, he had finally become a deputy priest. Unlike an apprentice priest, he was now officially recognized as a full-fledged priest and had received Hanaram’s special blessing.

And yet, the man he carried in his heart had never faded. Every time he thought of him, the emotions resurfaced as vividly as ever. The only improvement was that he thought of him less often than before.

Hanaram, thank you for your divine blessing. But if only you had taken this heart away instead…

As a priest, harboring impure affection for someone—let alone a man—filled him with guilt. Yet, in the sacred paintings, Hanaram always smiled upon him with benevolence.

‘It’s not like you’re hurting anyone. You’re just liking someone by yourself. What’s the big deal? Hanaram isn’t that petty.’

‘Do you think you know Hanaram better than I do?’

Je Sang-ah, who always brushed off his deep concerns like they were trivial, made Yoo Hyun-jin scowl as he absentmindedly smoothed his freshly donned priestly robes. She raised an eyebrow.

‘So, am I wrong?’

‘…No, but that’s not the point.’

Yoo Hyun-jin shrank back immediately.

He sighed inwardly, wondering why she had to come along.

As soon as his trip to Pyeonghang was decided, Je Sang-ah had insisted on coming with him. Her excuse was that she wanted to go on a pilgrimage, but the real reason was simple—she wanted to travel. She had always loved traveling, but as a princess, she rarely had the chance to leave the capital. Now that Yoo Hyun-jin was going, she had latched onto the idea of accompanying him under the guise of a pilgrimage.

He thought the royal family wouldn’t allow it, but surprisingly, they granted her permission without much fuss. He wasn’t sure why.

Regardless, if Je Sang-ah hadn’t come, he could have limited his encounters with Hyun Tae-oh to the bare minimum. But with her around, avoiding him was impossible. After all, they were technically visiting her fiancé.

Yoo Hyun-jin let out a heavy sigh, suppressing the anticipation bubbling within him. How could he still miss him after all these years?

No, let’s at least hope for the best.

It had been four years since he had seen him up close. Even when Hyun Tae-oh returned to the capital occasionally, Yoo Hyun-jin had only watched from afar before quickly slipping away. As a result, the dreams he once had almost every other night had dwindled to about once a week.

Maybe my feelings have dulled. Maybe I’ll be able to face him and exchange greetings with a composed heart this time.

…At least, that was what he told himself.

Dulled, my ass.

The moment he spotted Hyun Tae-oh in the distance, waiting to greet Je Sang-ah, his heart pounded violently. He despaired. Seeing him after so long only made his chest feel tighter, and the excitement surged anew.

Don’t let it show. Don’t let it slip.

When Hyun Tae-oh turned to him after greeting Je Sang-ah, Yoo Hyun-jin nearly stopped breathing, standing stiffly in place.

‘Welcome. It must have been a tiring journey.’

‘Thank you. I’ll just be staying for a short while.’

Normally, he would have stayed in the lodgings provided by the temple, but because Je Sang-ah had tagged along, they ended up staying at the governor’s residence instead. He had insisted on staying at the temple, but the princess wouldn’t hear of it.

Hyun Tae-oh cast a cool gaze over Yoo Hyun-jin, scanning him from head to toe in his priestly robes. For a moment, the corner of his lips seemed to lift slightly.

‘So, you’ve finally become a deputy priest. Congratulations. Now that you’re a priest, will you offer a prayer for me?’

‘…I can, but why me?’

Pyeonghang was a sacred land mentioned in the scriptures, home to a major temple with plenty of revered priests. There were even high priests there. Why would he ask a mere deputy priest? It would be far better for him to receive the prayers of a high priest.

Yoo Hyun-jin spoke humbly, but for some reason, he noticed the tension in Hyun Tae-oh’s temple as if he was subtly gritting his teeth.

‘You haven’t changed.’

‘…Neither have you, Your Excellency.’

Yoo Hyun-jin could almost see the words “This bastard…” flash across Hyun Tae-oh’s forehead. But surely, that was just his imagination.

‘Come inside. Since we’ve met after so long, have some tea and share news from the capital.’

Hyun Tae-oh turned without hesitation, leading them toward the residence.

Yoo Hyun-jin, momentarily mesmerized by his retreating figure, forced himself to look away.

Seeing his face again after so long, hearing his voice again—it all made him unbearably happy. If he wasn’t careful, his true feelings would spill out today.

Yoo Hyun-jin suddenly stopped in his tracks.

‘I’ll head to my quarters first. You two should talk.’

Hyun Tae-oh, who had been walking ahead, halted and turned to look at him. That unwavering gaze caught Yoo Hyun-jin in a trance-like grip.

After staring straight at him for a long moment, Hyun Tae-oh finally nodded.

‘Very well, do as you wish.’

The faint twist of his lips made him look unusually fierce, but even that looked beautiful to Yoo Hyun-jin’s longing eyes.

* * *

Pyeonghang was a beautiful place, nestled between the sea at its front and mountains at its back.

Although the long war with Songal had left it in ruins compared to its past glory, the land remained fertile, its rich harbor and the abundant resources of Pyeonghang Bay ensuring prosperity all year round. It was no wonder both nations had fought so fiercely over it.

Located along the border with Songal, Pyeonghang had been a place where Songal and Jeyang people had lived together for centuries. Historically, the land had changed hands many times—at certain points, it belonged to Songal; at others, it was part of Jeyang.

Even now, Songal continued to claim that Pyeonghang was originally theirs, occasionally sparking disputes. However, those conflicts had noticeably decreased ever since the current governor took office.

With one of the longest histories on the continent, Pyeonghang was also a sacred site. It was here that the prophet first received Hanaram’s revelation, making it a place that Hanaram’s followers aspired to visit at least once in their lifetime. Every autumn, the temple in Pyeonghang held a grand ritual dedicated to Hanaram—an event of such importance that prominent figures from all sectors attended without fail.

Since that ceremony was part of this pastoral visit’s schedule, Yoo Hyun-jin barely stepped out of the temple, working from dawn until dusk every day.

Je Sang-ah, however, had plenty of free time and would often drop by to see him.

‘Hey, Yoo Hyun-jin.’

The day before the ceremony, after spending the entire day running around the temple, Yoo Hyun-jin returned to his lodgings only to collapse onto the bed. Je Sang-ah, sitting lazily on a chair with her arms crossed, spoke in a chilling tone as she glared at him.

It was the first time they had seen each other since parting ways earlier that afternoon in the temple’s forest. And—Hyun Tae-oh was also there.

‘Do you really have to go that far to hide it? It’s enough to just not make it obvious. Do you really need to act like you dislike him?’

‘…I never pretended to dislike him.’

‘Oh, come on! That attitude?!’

Je Sang-ah suddenly shouted in exasperation, looking at him like he was hopeless. Yoo Hyun-jin, who had been trying to bury himself into the bed, ended up sitting upright when she smacked his back. He rubbed his now-stinging back and shot her a wounded look.

He was aware that he acted a little stiff in front of Hyun Tae-oh.

(A little?!) Je Sang-ah had yelled earlier.

But it wasn’t his fault. Whenever he faced Hyun Tae-oh, his eyes would automatically linger on the man’s face for a few seconds, entranced. If he didn’t consciously control himself, he would undoubtedly give away his true feelings.

And there were a thousand reasons why that was absolutely not an option.

He was someone else’s fiancé. A man, no less. Of noble birth, far above Yoo Hyun-jin’s station. And his personality? That was another matter entirely. Even if he was blinded by admiration, Yoo Hyun-jin was well aware of how frightening Hyun Tae-oh could be.

He feared him.

That was why he was so careful. But to Je Sang-ah, his carefulness just made him look even stiffer.

‘But today—I really couldn’t help it. And, well, it was kind of your fault too.’

‘Excuse me? How is this my fault?’

‘How was I supposed to know that the person who had been sitting comfortably under the tree would suddenly leave nothing but her blanket and disappear somewhere? And how was I supposed to expect that Hyun Tae-oh—who I rarely even run into at the governor’s residence—would be sitting there instead?’

Yoo Hyun-jin’s frustration was real.

That morning, Je Sang-ah had arrived at the temple carrying a picnic basket and laid out a mat under a tree in the temple’s forest.

Pyeonghang was home to the oldest tree in Jeyang. Over three thousand years old, its massive trunk was thicker than a small cottage, its branches stretching high into the sky. A golden carpet of fallen leaves covered the ground beneath it.

During a brief break that morning, Yoo Hyun-jin had sat with Je Sang-ah under that tree, drinking tea together. When it was time for prayer, he left, assuring her that he would return in about an hour and a half. She had told him she would stay there and wait.

After finishing his prayers, Yoo Hyun-jin happened to receive a call from his younger brother in the capital. As usual, his brother had nothing but nagging words for him, but since Je Sang-ah was also friends with his sibling, Yoo Hyun-jin figured he might as well pass along some updates.

So, in good spirits, he ran toward the forest, excited to share the news. From a distance, he could still see the edge of the picnic mat peeking out from behind the enormous tree.

Carefully avoiding the thick tree roots bulging from the dirt, Yoo Hyun-jin sat down beside the presence he had sensed behind the tree trunk, his movements half-hidden in the shadow.

His shoelace had come undone after getting caught on a small root, and he had nearly tripped. Focused on tying it back tightly, he absentmindedly chattered.

「Ah, seriously, Se-jin nags way too much. He called me the moment I finished my prayers. He told me to tell you to enjoy yourself since you’re finally out traveling. And then to me, the first thing he said was—」

――Don’t get carried away just because you met Governor Hyun Tae-oh.

That was what he had meant to say. But as soon as he finished tying his shoelace and turned his head toward Je Sang-ah—he froze.

Where Je Sang-ah had been sitting just earlier, on the very blanket she had laid out, Hyun Tae-oh was sitting alone.

Yoo Hyun-jin’s body and mind froze all at once.

The man who was usually too busy to even appear at dinner was now sitting under a tree in the temple’s forest, in broad daylight on a weekday.

「…Sang-ah… where…」

So flustered that he didn’t even realize he had just addressed the princess informally in front of her betrothed, his lips barely moved as he struggled to get the words out.

Hyun Tae-oh, gazing down at him with a cool expression, responded.

「Her Highness was here until a short while ago, but she stepped away for a moment.」

「…I see. But, Your Excellency… why are you here…?」

「I stopped by the temple in preparation for tomorrow’s ceremony. On my way out, I happened to meet Her Highness. She invited me to have tea, so I stayed for a while.」

「…I see.」

A quiet silence settled between them.

Above, the leaves rustled in the breeze.

Yoo Hyun-jin slowly lifted the teapot and poured himself a cup, as if nothing had happened. He just wanted to quietly drink his tea—but just as he was about to take a sip to soothe his dry throat, Hyun Tae-oh spoke.

「It sounded like your younger brother had something to say about me. Was he…?」

He almost choked.

Coughing slightly but managing to hold it back, Yoo Hyun-jin’s mind went blank.

「――Governor Hyun Tae-oh, he said…」

Don’t slip up. If I say the wrong thing, he’ll find out. He absolutely cannot find out.

「…not to feel uncomfortable.」

He muttered whatever came to mind while staring at his teacup. In hindsight, that didn’t make much sense either. But it was still a hundred times better than letting the truth slip.

He forced himself to lift his gaze and meet Hyun Tae-oh’s eyes. To keep his expression neutral, to make sure no trace of a lie showed.

Hyun Tae-oh silently studied him.

「…I see. He told you not to feel uncomfortable meeting me.」

「Yes. But it’s fine since I rarely run into Your Excellency here.」

Once again, Yoo Hyun-jin spewed out whatever words came to mind before quickly taking a sip of tea. He didn’t even know what it tasted like or whether it had gone down his throat properly. It didn’t matter. He just needed to look as normal as possible. If Hyun Tae-oh spoke again, he could stall for time by sipping tea.

A heavy silence stretched on. In his mind, it lasted an eternity.

Fortunately, Hyun Tae-oh did not say anything more.

He simply watched Yoo Hyun-jin. His unwavering gaze weighed on him, but Yoo Hyun-jin held firm, staring down at his teacup.

Just before his trembling fingers were about to give him away, Je Sang-ah returned.

「Oh, Priest, you’re here?」 she greeted brightly. The tension finally lifted, like air slowly seeping out of a suffocating room.

Had Hyun Tae-oh stayed just one more minute, Yoo Hyun-jin might have turned to stone and crumbled into dust.

‘You’ve got some guts, I’ll give you that. Hyun Tae-oh was looking at you like he was about to devour you, and you actually managed to drink tea in front of him?’

‘…Was he?’

‘You clueless idiot! Are you brave or just completely unaware?!’

Je Sang-ah yelled, looking like she was about to tear her hair out. Guilt-ridden, Yoo Hyun-jin flinched.

‘It’s fine as long as I don’t show that I like him, right? Why would I go out of my way to act like I dislike him?’

‘Are you kidding me?!’

The sheer frustration in her expression could have shattered stone. Yoo Hyun-jin quickly averted his gaze.

Just then, the news was reporting on Pyeonghang, and Hyun Tae-oh appeared on the screen. He seemed to be out inspecting the area, walking through the streets as the camera captured his profile.

Yoo Hyun-jin, unable to help himself, stared blankly at the screen.

In person, he was much more striking. But on the screen, at least, he could look at him freely without worrying about being caught.

Je Sang-ah, who had been glaring at him with a mix of disbelief and exhaustion, let out a long sigh as if all her energy had been drained.

‘Fine. Just keep doing whatever you’ve been doing. There’s no helping you. Honestly, your eyes are practically dripping honey. You could start beekeeping with that gaze.’

(The news happened to switch topics at that moment, cutting away from Hyun Tae-oh.)

Feeling unfairly scolded, Yoo Hyun-jin suddenly felt a wave of frustration rise.

‘By the way, Sang-ah, why are you even here?’

‘Pilgrimage.’

Je Sang-ah, who usually just dropped by the temple to hang out, answered with a completely straight face.

‘You barely spend any time at the temple, though. What are you actually doing all day?’

Unlike her, Yoo Hyun-jin spent every hour from sunrise to sunset at the temple. And yet, not once had he seen her there, deep in prayer.

‘Just sightseeing. It’s my first time in Pyeonghang, you know. Since Songal’s culture is mixed in, the architecture and customs are pretty unique. There’s a lot to see.’

‘Stop wandering around and stay put for once. It’s dangerous.’

That’s what he said, but of course, Je Sang-ah had her own guards assigned to her. His Majesty had personally arranged for them. Normally, the local governor— ‘Hyun Tae-oh, the Governor of Pyeonghang—’ would have been responsible for providing her security, but the king had specifically sent guards with her so that she wouldn’t trouble the busy governor.

Because of that, Hyun Tae-oh didn’t assign her any additional guards. When she refused his protection, he had simply looked at her for a moment before nodding and saying, 「Understood.」 before dismissing them.

Still, even with guards, wasn’t she being a little too reckless?

Just a few days ago, it had been the same.

He had needed to ask her something urgent about the ceremony, so he went looking for her—only to find her sitting in a bustling tea house, chatting with two unfamiliar men.

Startled, he quickly scanned the area and spotted a guard seated in the corner, silently keeping watch. That eased his nerves a little, but still—how could a princess of the kingdom so casually drink tea with strange men in an unfamiliar place?

When Yoo Hyun-jin approached cautiously, watching them with wary eyes, Je Sang-ah spotted him and waved cheerfully, completely unbothered.

「Oh my, Hyun-jin!」

She always used honorifics in public, but obviously, she couldn’t exactly call him ‘Priest’ or ‘Your Eminence’ in a place like this. Awkwardly, he hesitated before mumbling,

「Uh… Sang-ah…」

and walked closer.

「These people are…?」

「Oh, I just met them here. They’re travelers from Songal. They invited me for a cup of tea, so we’re chatting.」

Beaming, she added, 「They said they’ve never seen such a beautiful woman before! And later tonight, they want to take me to the best bar in town!」

She giggled, utterly delighted.

…Was she out of her mind?!

The men, smiling amicably, casually asked, 「Are you her friend? No way, are you her boyfriend?」

Yoo Hyun-jin barely managed a stiff greeting before gritting his teeth and dragging her out of there.

「Are you insane?! What were you thinking, drinking tea with strange men—from an enemy nation, no less?! And a bar?! Have you completely lost it?! Do you have any idea how dangerous the world is?!」

He was furious, but Je Sang-ah barely even batted an eye.

And then, her expression twisted sharply, her eyes narrowing as she snapped,

「It’s not like I’m committing adultery, or planning a one-night stand! What’s wrong with making a nice little travel memory by sharing tea with a handsome young man?!」

Her words hit him like machine-gun fire.

‘Do you not trust me? Do you not trust the guards that my father personally assigned to me?!’

And then, as if to make matters worse, her large eyes filled with unshed tears.

「This is my first time traveling this far from home… It’s my first time talking to strangers, my first time walking through streets like this… Once I go back to the capital, I’ll probably never get to come to places like this again…」

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she rubbed them away like a sulking child.

Faced with that, Yoo Hyun-jin was completely helpless.

Eventually, he gave in, raising both hands in surrender.

Thinking about it again, well… she did have a point.

Since childhood, Je Sang-ah had grown up in the strict confines of the palace, like a bird trapped in a gilded cage.

Even if she wanted to go somewhere, there were endless restrictions, and she had to live every moment under the gaze of others.

He didn’t know why His Majesty had suddenly allowed her this time, but this was her first time freely wandering such a distant place.

Maybe, just maybe—His Majesty had felt pity for his daughter and wanted to let her enjoy a few days of freedom before her marriage.

「Alright… Fine. At least while you’re here, enjoy yourself. But always be careful, okay? Now, stop crying.」

Yoo Hyun-jin had no choice but to console her, gently wiping away her tears with a handkerchief.

And once he had comforted her that one time, there was no stopping her. Every single day, she wandered off somewhere, brimming with excitement.

Something felt off.

Somehow… he had a feeling he had been completely deceived by her.

Still, when he saw her face so full of joy every day, something in his own heart softened.

‘What did you do today?’

Yoo Hyun-jin asked as he sat on the bed, turning toward her.

Just moments ago, she had been scolding him relentlessly, but now, Je Sang-ah immediately switched back to her usual bright expression.

‘Went to the market! It was fun. There were so many people!’

‘Be careful. There are a lot of Songal people here. Don’t just casually mingle with strangers.’

‘What, do you think every Songal person just goes around attacking people?’

‘You’re a princess!’

‘Who would know that?’

Yoo Hyun-jin frowned, about to launch into another lecture—but then suddenly, he blinked.

‘…Actually, if you act and talk the way you do with me, no one would ever guess you’re a noble princess.’

‘Did you just insult me? Should I let out a full string of curses for you?’

‘If you know it’s an insult, then stop acting like that!’

Je Sang-ah chuckled at his frustration, flashing him a playful eye smile.

‘Don’t worry. I’m with someone trustworthy.’

Yoo Hyun-jin had just opened his mouth to demand, ‘Who exactly is trustworthy?’—but before he could, she abruptly changed the subject.

‘Are the preparations for tomorrow’s ritual all set?’

‘Huh? Oh, yeah. You’d better come tomorrow. Don’t even think about skipping the most important ceremony when you came all this way for a pilgrimage.’

He knew she wouldn’t, but he still made sure to say it firmly.

Tomorrow was the final day of his pastoral mission and the most significant ritual held in Pyeonghang each year.

All of Pyeonghang’s key figures would be there.

A princess who had traveled from the capital for a pilgrimage was expected to attend.

Once the ritual was over, the mission would be complete, and they would return to the capital.

‘…….’

He felt a pang of regret.

It had been nice, seeing him again after so long.

Even if they hadn’t met often, just catching glimpses of him had been enough.

As if by habit, Yoo Hyun-jin thought of Hyun Tae-oh.

Realizing what he was doing, he immediately tried to shake off the thought—but ended up sighing instead.

There was no use.

He had tried to suppress these feelings so many times, but every attempt had ended in failure.

How could he erase this from his heart?

Would he be forced to carry it for the rest of his life?

‘If only I could decide how I feel.’

‘…Yeah.’

Je Sang-ah murmured, almost to herself.

She had been unusually lost in thought for a while now, and Yoo Hyun-jin glanced at her curiously.

But as soon as she noticed his gaze, she immediately put on her usual bright expression and asked,

‘What? Why?’

Seeing that, Yoo Hyun-jin simply tilted his head slightly and let it go.

* * *

The ritual was carried out at exactly the expected time. It was an astonishing thing, considering that just before the ceremony, amidst the crowds steadily flowing into the temple, someone had thrown a bomb at Governor Hyun Tae-oh of Pyeonghang as he entered.

Thanks to the thorough safety inspections conducted the previous day from the temple entrance to the main hall and annex, the improvised explosive device was not particularly powerful. Moreover, as if anticipating such an event, the guards stationed near the governor had immediately shielded him, minimizing the damage. There were a few injured, some minor, some serious, but no fatalities, and the governor, the primary target, remained largely unscathed. The only injury he sustained was a burn on his palm—acquired while casually picking up an unexploded bomb that had rolled to his feet, its fuse sputtering weakly, and hurling it at the fleeing assailant, striking them squarely on the back of the head.

The attacker was captured on the spot. He was a young man from Songal who admitted that the attack was an act of revenge against Hyun Tae-oh for his role in the war against Songal. Naturally, news of the incident quickly spread to those waiting inside the temple for the ceremony. Some suggested delaying the ritual, but by the governor’s orders, a soldier arrived ahead of him with a message: 「The governor will be here by the time the ritual begins. There is no need to postpone it.」 And so, the ceremony proceeded as planned.