B | Chapter 12

Moon Soyeo quickly stepped back two steps, muttering.

“Ah, haha… Well, having met a strong newtype like Jae Chaeui-nim first, I guess I wouldn’t stand out? Haha…”

Their voice sounded artificially cheerful, clearly deflated. Watching their forced smile made me feel uneasy. Even among ragtag mercenaries, there was a hierarchy among newtypes. It seemed Deschement wasn’t much different.

To think Moon Soyeo, whom I thought was just a kind staff member, was a remarkable newtype… The psychological distance between us suddenly widened. Yet, seeing them flinch under Jae Chaeui’s presence made them seem pitiful.

I wanted to offer some comfort to Moon Soyeo’s naive expression, but Jae Chaeui spat out cold words like venom.

“Why should Song Morae recognize a weakling like you? Can you call someone who can’t even go on field dispatches a sentinel? How can you distinguish between a newtype and a regular person when they’re worthless trash?”

“……”

“Why not switch to being a guide? You’d fit better in a cheap travel agency than Deschement. You seem more suited for tourist guiding.”

“……”

…Isn’t that a bit too harsh…?

It was a scathing remark that not only struck but shattered bones, ground them into dust, and salted the earth. Somehow, I felt more dejected than Moon Soyeo. Though he didn’t curse, he casually threw words that slapped people in the face, just like yesterday. On the other hand, it felt different from how he treated me.

Contrary to my worries, Moon Soyeo was a cheerful person. They quickly brightened their expression and poured out new words like a machine gun.

“But Jae Chaeui-nim, aren’t you going on a dive? I heard you’re handling the stitch too. They even called reporters to show that ‘Jae Chaeui is still strong’…”

‘Dive.’ It referred to entering a gate that had just started to open and dealing with the monsters inside before it fully opened. Destroying the gate’s core, known as the heart, could close the gate entirely. That was called a ‘stitch,’ meaning to sew the gate shut.

For me, it was just something I’d seen and heard in movies or dramas. I’d never voluntarily entered a gate with rampaging monsters.

Until yesterday, I was hoping for more gates left without stitches due to Deschement’s ‘confidential reasons.’ That way, I could continue my cleanup work.

My routine involved covering myself in the scent of blood, dragging debris, and walking on dead land.

To me, sentinels discussing such incredible tasks as if they were nothing was fascinating.

“Hmm! Many guides are curious about Song Morae-nim. There are even more sentinels, those reckless and arrogant ones. Wouldn’t it be better for me to stick around than let those guys approach carelessly?”

I acknowledged Moon Soyeo as quite the chatterbox. Even after hearing such harsh words from Jae Chaeui, they continued to chatter without pause. Their cute face’s cheeks never stayed still. If I pulled on them, they’d probably stretch like mochi.

My leisure in listening to their conversation ended there. Suddenly, Jae Chaeui turned and filled my vision. He stretched out his arms and pulled me into his embrace. My view was blocked by his broad chest, and his hands clung to my back. Being held in his enormous arms, like I was a small dog, gave me chills.

Not knowing how to position myself, I just clenched my fists. Jae Chaeui caressed my stiff back, stuck in a rigid stance. Then he sniffed around my ear, neck, and cheek, pressing his high nose against them.

“What is this smell?”

“……”

The familiar question made my hand twitch involuntarily. Then I remembered the morning shower and felt calm again. Thanks to pouring an entire bottle of rose-scented body wash, my body no longer smelled like the filthy remnants of a ruined gate.

The scent Jae Chaeui caught was something else.

“Song Morae. Do you smoke?”

“Yes.”

“Why don’t you quit?”

“……”

I don’t want to.

I conveyed that meaning through silence. I had saved that precious cigarette for so long, and who made me smoke it? Being hugged by Jae Chaeui and trembling at his whispers made me crave another cigarette. It’s a shame there were no smoking rooms or cigarette vending machines in the annex or the main building I toured today.

Jae Chaeui gave me a long, heavy look. Even knowing he was staring at my profile from a distance close enough to feel his breath, I didn’t respond and just endured. Then he exhaled disapprovingly, and the breath touched the hair on my cheek. Shivering, I trembled my shoulders, and he hugged me even tighter. If I endured the same hug twice, I’d become Song Morae juice.

Gasping for breath, Jae Chaeui whispered in my ear.

“I’m off.”

The sudden farewell was seemingly affectionate. Unfortunately, it had been so long since I’d heard a family member say “I’m off” that I couldn’t recall the appropriate response. My tongue was glued to the roof of my mouth, unable to move in my tightly closed mouth.

Fortunately, Jae Chaeui didn’t mind my silence. He immediately turned his head and commanded Moon Soyeo.

“Take good care of Song Morae.”

Jae Chaeui left as swiftly as he came. All that remained in his place was Moon Soyeo, whose smile had become slightly awkward, and me, with my whole body tingling.

Knowing Moon Soyeo’s identity as a sentinel made their guidance less comfortable. Jae Chaeui might have called them a weakling, incompetent, and trash, but they were still an A0 rank newtype. I worried about wasting such valuable personnel on me. On the other hand, I thought it wasn’t my place to dictate how they spent their time, so I decided to follow along and listen to whatever they said.

Moon Soyeo took me to a hotel. It was a high-rise building standing right behind Deschement’s main building, and as soon as I entered, I froze at the hotel’s unique atmosphere.

Stopping in the lobby, where octagonal wooden chairs and a tiger statue with iron-clad tiles were placed, I glanced at Moon Soyeo in confusion.

‘Why are we at a hotel…?’

Moon Soyeo, who had been walking energetically ahead, seemed to quickly notice my doubtful expression. With their characteristic laugh, they said,

“From the third floor up, it’s provided as accommodations for sentinels and guides. There’s a studio on the first floor. It’s mainly used when calling reporters or taking photos.”

‘Ah…’

Only then did my steps lighten. I felt both sorry and embarrassed. They say if you’ve rolled in a dung field, you only know the smell of dung, and that was exactly my situation. Having only met newtypes who charged at me with their legs spread, I ended up worrying that Moon Soyeo might slap me and get angry if they found out.

Oh. Come to think of it, not all newtypes were like that… Jae Chaeui was the opposite.

“Come, have a seat.”

Luckily, there was a photographer in the studio where Moon Soyeo led me. A tall bar chair was placed in the center of a spot with a white backdrop. Following the guidance, I sat in front of it and buttoned my shirt all the way up.

“A new ID will be issued for you as a member of Deschement. Think of it as taking a profile picture for that.”

Maybe because life has been a hell of distrust, even though Moon Soyeo’s words and Jae Chaeui’s attitude seemed to confirm that I was a guide here, I couldn’t believe it. The talk of a new ID and being an exclusive guide didn’t feel like mine. I could only trust the matching test results. I’d only feel relieved if I heard the result was over 1%.

Holding a camera that looked very expensive, the photographer said,

“Hmm… Your complexion is too pale. Should I apply some blush?”

“No, thank you.”

“Alright, I’ll edit it after taking the photos.”

I didn’t want that either, but I nodded reluctantly.

What followed was a series of shutter sounds more like ‘click’ than ‘snap.’ Enduring the bright lights and reflectors that hurt my eyes, I tried to keep my expression steady. My complexion and expression had always been like this. I was pale enough to show my veins since I was young, and growing up, working at night and handling dead monsters only made it worse.

Having a complexion as pale as a dead person isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Thanks to this complexion, I once saved my life. It was the day I entered a dangerous gate with living monsters, having swallowed wrong information. That day was my uncle’s memorial and the happiest day of my life.

In the middle of that gate, lying next to the torn bodies of my uncle and his subordinates, I spent the night. Even the monsters roaming around seemed to mistake me for a corpse and didn’t touch me. It was almost a miraculous survival.

It was a shame I had no friends or family to share that story with.