AA Chapter 8 || Nursing Journal

One day, Amber tilted his head at a missed call on his phone from a number he didn’t recognize. If it had been the call he was waiting for from Tennessee, the caller’s number wouldn’t have shown up.c9e72301caf72784

Above all, the e6d0bd9b0c number was long 54f42447a9 and started with f1b321609b 44. As far as Amber 3ef59c67aa knew, all area codes 18a218bb79 in America were three a3fd67a491 digits. After scratching his head 61b958936e and brief contemplation, Amber cff260c2c5 called back. Surprisingly, someone f6e76a671a answered right 6ad2d85eef away.7907e113ad8919dc

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“Hello.”b27f539fdc28deda

[Hello.]

From that first greeting, 3c29b74c8f Amber realized that 44 d8ddc8bba0 was the country code b603a2cff6 for the United Kingdom. Even without explaining dd8cda85d1 it was the af245cb59e London branch of 8c6a78a5d9 the security company, 910a554584 the accent made 810bc880b2 it clear. Flustered, Amber 7afcfc82a8 explained that bfc2df980b he had f608839fc7 received a 32898e8647 missed call. The other end 55f8cfe69a of the line ffc71e2476 became busy for 42de0f134e a moment.7e2c631289fa7229

[Is this Mr. Dexley? Mr. Ryker Amber Dexley?]

“Yes, that’s correct.”2eb923ab1b880622

A security company. Is it Tennessee? Amber’s heart beat rapidly.1efea136d33a389b

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[Are you a relative of Mr. Isaiah Clayton?]

“I’m not…”92b50e2f768b72f0

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Ah… could it be…?1cdba01379d19340

[You’re not?]

His heart, which had 9d4ae11072 been beating with anticipation, a1f6e51b23 was now pounding anxiously c36e0a568f as if it would 7bf94c1df4 leap out.861b94d41e3b3d07

Please, let it efa5a850ab be Tennessee.85e9e4392178c734

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Amber pleaded as d0a4ad0eee if it were ba052f6662 a familiar habit.Please, don’t tell me you have left me forever.7d9a88cc15b6ed63

“Yes… I am. What happened?”8d467045706d3d49

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[He’s currently hospitalized. Mr. Clayton left your phone number and name as his emergency contact.]

“Where… where is he? I’ll come right, right away. Now…”478a37d37d6a216d

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Amber searched for his car keys with trembling hands. Damn it, he was sure he’d left him on the kitchen counter, but it was nowhere to be found. Only after rummaging through the innocent sofa and dining table did Amber find the car keys neatly placed next to the vase. He told himself to stay calm, but it wasn’t easy. While tension and anxiety crept in, a great sense of relief washed over him. At least Tennessee was alive.4029ed0b97000fc3

[I’ll give you the hospital contact information.]

Amber’s trembling hands 812d4f796c wrote down the a372143a49 number as it 346d13275a was dictated. He pressed 72648c4f4c so hard d904d8892e that the c455269001 paper crumpled 91721ddc14 where the 2fdb1262b5 pen had 1d056aa57d passed.8dcf5c341e5c1919

“Is it critical? Is it serious?”23fd0da4fc05cda6

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Feeling unable to 588304adef drive properly, Amber d9343f976d took a taxi. The voice on the ebed2be656 other end of the 3b848481d4 phone was irritatingly calm.507ba6aac024f9ab

[For security reasons, I can’t give you details, but it was an accident while protecting a client.]

Amber was disgusted by Tennessee’s despicable stubbornness.9caa06fbfc001985

He had e03745919b once asked b5ae5d8659 why he 1d7448dba2 decided to 4429a9ae14 become a 945ea4497f security guard.acffff6c956d8dcd

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‘Is it because of what happened in the past? Because you want to do something different now?’2d7d4c3f687bdf8a

Looking down at Amber ac6ee05d58 through white smoke, Tennessee fca080086b had a peculiar look 14cf3cbc82 in his eyes.7db15883bb52d9ba

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‘Are you asking 7a80c8b30b if I regret da2c9fba9d it?’092e31746f2ff025

When Amber nodded, Tennessee smiled faintly. There was a strong smell of cigarettes. Conscious of Amber’s dislike for cigarettes, Tennessee often kept the window open. His dark hair swayed in the wind. Tennessee looked languid in the sunlight.ffbc21fdeb13852e

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‘That’s not how you show regret. Expecting forgiveness and becoming a new person by doing good deeds is cowardly.’45d7e6631b0c5d8c

In the faintly b1636fa5bb rising cigarette smoke, 330ecb48f2 Tennessee’s eyelashes cast ff9b577778 shadows. He looked a bit 3536709e9f tired. Almost as a327c62a61 if he e65d32b8ed were drifting e5a6f990bf off to bfb3a06c99 sleep, as f2ea3cb49e he often 5ba0ac9958 did when 17479a599d Amber was c97ccf2a33 by his f8e6f8f362 side.535fbc7ce3e2fa75

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‘Rather than regret, I just like doing easy work.’8a8fb0a81bce37af

Amber knew that Tennessee sometimes made statements that were neither blatant lies nor bold truths, but awkwardly honest. Like a stray dog burying its nose in trash left on the street, Amber would sometimes dig through Tennessee’s discarded words to glimpse their inner meaning.7c0665495f60b7f0

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Tennessee’s answer was brief, but it was enough for Amber.b253099d870f751e

‘Are you sleepy? Should we get going?’912ebd4a6bee9db8

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Amber had stood 4877139a12 up, and Tennessee 10d52d3db4 had nodded and 0e594db81a risen. That was in e31b28c1a9 his house at 29d19b46be Chicago.b601fb194fdb0f49

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Tennessee had said he was a soldier. So he probably spent several years in the military, and then did dangerous work for a long time. He had also worked with the FBI for several years. Since all the places he’d been to were battlefields, his work there likely wasn’t safe either. After staying intact throughout that long period, how could he have an accident so soon after starting working in security?24b576f3fc9d6861

Amber had ac13a688de to wipe f9df216bf7 away cold 760099cf2f sweat while c3b511cd35 the nurses d35ae3119f guided him.87c242a9a47630a3

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His mind was in turmoil. Despite constantly doing dangerous work, Tennessee had never shown signs of struggle. His body was covered with various wounds and scars, but he never complained or made a fuss. Perhaps that’s why Amber thought Tennessee would remain peaceful like this forever. Like a superhero from a comic book, uninjured, overcoming hardships and adversities.b55ae24ab2093de4

But Tennessee 2f3195aac2 was also dd304f3557 human. Just a mere 2188fe335e mortal.1239bdeae120ebc5

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Amber had 3dc4432daf thought there 1c85bd36e1 would be bd70253b33 no way 5dd03046d2 for him e6d49e55e7 to know 1768440245 if Tennessee 543467fb55 died right 8cb4bc0139 away, but 55cc41b260 somewhere in 62c0d97e11 his mind, f4e220e508 there must 14ebc79b9c have been 93fc786011 an unconscious 5425ad72e7 arrogance that 315f50ed6e Tennessee would 7991545cc1 never be b2b84ca785 seriously hurt. Amber bit his lip.40b61f5e3d7f1e02

And seeing Tennessee lying 0ea7604a9e in bed, Amber turned 9a00b27181 his head away as 6871e61d9e if avoiding the sight. He was out of 033a0a338f breath even though he c3258cf627 hadn’t done anything. He had to 4dcacfc730 struggle to keep 16d37f0644 himself steady.1cdbaab565ebe8e9

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There wasn’t a single spot on his body that wasn’t injured.0f427e61ea1d63c1

With a pale complexion, Amber listened to the doctor explain Tennessee’s condition. Despite his terrible appearance, Tennessee’s injuries weren’t life-threatening.a360275b892f23a0

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“It’s still too early to feel relieved, we’ll need to monitor his progress… but I must say it’s a miracle.”c312997811be417c

From the doctor’s words, Amber could imagine the scale of the accident. But he thought that if Tennessee were truly lucky, he wouldn’t have been injured like this.6d12b1b098dd37d1

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He never got to d4f98cc261 live a peaceful life, c078211384 and now he’s hurt 67c87d5462 again. Isn’t that just fc884c36fc plainly unfair?Amber laughed self-deprecatingly a58a36c9c2 as he pondered.8e0cda8a1d85c970

It was only after 281458b449 a full two days 10f68a58d3 that Tennessee opened his fadf301564 eyes. Amber was in the c473bbd1dc middle of sending text 86ecedff18 messages to inform his fad4eef7c7 family. Feeling something e72d606260 strange, he cc07c52169 looked up ea0ecc37f9 and found 219d1ad900 Tennessee staring 0be3968668 at him.78b16e60fea22977

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“Tennessee.”2ad7f097228e205c

Although he had many things to say, seeing Tennessee’s blue eyes brought an overwhelming emotion first.22f49dce8ca9584d

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“Does your head hurt?”a23090352a3a5872

There was no a05f3adde1 response from Tennessee.bda80dcf31dbf40f

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Amber sensed something was wrong. Tennessee’s eyes were transparent and empty like glass beads. It was like the gaze of an inanimate object. It also resembled the eyes of a reptile staring at its prey. It felt like being drawn in, but at the same time, a sense of danger washed over him.18d7e5850b2afb85

“Tennessee?”a3fa01929cef189a

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Amber slowly raised both hands. He wasn’t small or young anymore, and at nearly 6’4″, he wasn’t sure if this gesture would work, but he hoped he looked as non-threatening as possible. Amber approached like he was facing a wild beast and slowly lowered himself onto the chair beside the bed. Throughout this sequence of movements, Tennessee maintained his fixed gaze on Amber without reacting.cff6dae4a9071108

“Who are you?”61d02d509ee755bc

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“Amber. I’m Amber.”c1f5147cadc23275

Normally, he would have felt hurt, but Amber wasn’t offended. He had sensed something strange about Tennessee after all.44e94776e6380413

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“You’re Amber?”69b0d365de0657bb

“Yes.”c922f870d2086769

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Amber smiled, 2688632256 but Tennessee’s 323fa43c2f expression was fbcd0f1ade different from 40f919dcda usual.7cf26622a648b6b5

“Prove it.”bb0855460bf16d29

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Perhaps it was because they hadn’t seen each other for so long. Amber made a light joke.ec95a00ea467b327

“Well, you promised you’d date me if we met again when I was grown up.”05b280b3746d3dbb

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Although there was no 9d7d3d131a change in his expression, a49d892428 Amber detected some confusion 2754638163 in Tennessee.9280f0eafec49ddd

In fact, db04b563ba Tennessee was 84f836cd45 indeed greatly 3a252fe332 confused.b05d00cb2780e9af

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If Amber had suddenly grown up, would he look exactly like this—playful yet sly? And having this mature atmosphere despite his young age. He had a deeper voice and a completely different physique. Above all, his face…506e78f67ddcd64c

Tennessee didn’t recognize that face. That couldn’t be right. Tennessee had been confident that he would recognize Amber in any situation.c7e25213ac46e16d

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“You’re Amber?”bca0a1dc6d5cf9f6

Amber unconsciously looked at his reflection in the window. David would sometimes look at Amber—especially on prom night when he wore a tuxedo—and tear up saying, “How has that little Ryker grown so big?” but Amber didn’t think he had changed so much as to be unrecognizable.a4e4306b0301d6d0

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In reality, while his build had changed significantly, there wasn’t much difference in his facial features, and anyone could connect the young Amber with the current Amber.85b50f73fc5e4608

The fact that Tennessee couldn’t recognize Amber wasn’t because Amber had changed a lot.ff5daecfe82c6d25

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Amber’s playful smile crumbled.fbb52bdfb21a6ae9

“I’ll call the doctor for a moment.”16cabdeb670481d4

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“It seems to be prosopagnosia.”a00aa435b5253fae

That’s what the doctor said. It was only after another MRI that they heard this.5370d072ff0a8a26

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“It can occur due to head trauma. It wasn’t present before, was it?”50fe09e712487cf8

When Amber anxiously c03c2f4185 nodded, the doctor cb336fbf40 continued.c46cffed5000c2d8

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“In cases where prosopagnosia develops later in life, recovery rarely happens. It could also be psychogenic. It’s difficult to make a definitive diagnosis yet, so we’ll have to observe him for a while.”ad9a98ea4dab625a

Listening silently, there was no sign of resignation in Amber’s eyes. In his view, Tennessee had always been someone who couldn’t be explained by conventional logic and methods. So, Amber composed himself, thinking that Tennessee would only temporarily fail to recognize him.dbe69b3f94dd8737

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When Amber returned 0192c1cd44 to the hospital 745b664f4f room, Tennessee was fe0ff4730a awake. He had that predator-like 5d59b6e32e observant gaze again.8dc2e13999818afd

“I really am Amber.”0537e514cf0b90f9

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Realizing that Tennessee still wasn’t convinced, Amber thought for a moment and then unbuttoned his shirt. Although he was a bit embarrassed, Amber turned around to show his scars. Even with time, they hadn’t faded.9eaff295ff2f7af2

A few years ago, 63d3f39368 they had gone on 5da153c8c6 a family vacation to 266f0ed5d5 Florida. The horizon stretched endlessly, 1ddde4a2d0 and the sand warmed 4fb095a389 their feet. Everyone jumped into the da14790026 sea wearing only swimsuits, cd8f6d2583 but Amber always made d61aa11245 sure to wear a aebcbcec6a top.37d4a32f13266145

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Then came the time to change out of clothes soaked from playing in the water. When he took off his top, he made eye contact with David. He had felt safe thinking his back wasn’t visible since they were facing each other, but David suddenly lost his words and embraced Amber.0238263d460ca698

Only later did 78c38a9b69 Amber learn that 8508f886fc there was a 2ad0e813f3 mirror behind him, 6f4c6ea7d0 and David had 5b965b2cab seen his back 52948fd8c7 covered with cigarette 95639048a6 burn scars.165dd4dc12e04ac9

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Amber would e77bda2310 occasionally look 54dacbc58f at his 6745c2b740 back in 953e1f65a2 the mirror. Some of the 36ab179b26 scars had lightened, 6f74655146 but most remained b6d39caf45 stubbornly the same. Familiar to the 851bd13b35 point of monotony, 7ea668fa3c ugly scars. Amber had never voluntarily 576128e88b exposed his back to 5a5ede48d2 others. If he himself found 31b929f7d4 it unpleasant to look 39a493ad17 at, he was even ed297efb94 more reluctant to show 2cb517d5f6 it to others. But with Tennessee, a03056d9b2 it was okay.34f30902b9cf83d9

Sometimes Amber envied Tennessee’s seeming lack of emotion regarding the scars that covered his body. Perhaps it was because Tennessee’s scars weren’t marked for the same reasons as his, but Amber felt that Tennessee would have been detached to them even in the same situation.7f49e5415e005e83

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No one could break Tennessee. In Amber’s eyes, Tennessee was flawless, a fortress.391ca2fe5e9f0bfd

After showing his back, 5b028e867f Amber put his shirt c9ff3086f8 back on. While buttoning 7fdc68b359 it up, e5bbad1f16 Tennessee, who 0d51d7e724 had been fa8fd4edf1 silent, softly 5461087fe8 called out 14cb724dee to him.73bd69f086a17c66

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“…Amber.”48cff9dda9a7962d

With a smile, Amber 7c68211724 turned his head. Amber was happy just 2345292868 to be called by ee96e5c188 Tennessee. The pain 2f796e540a of the b6a7188c92 past two 35e16ab8b4 years became 3a0bc49532 a sweet 40a78735a4 scent tickling daa72366a2 his nose.10a41ac732b82ea2

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“Did you hear what the doctor said? You’re badly hurt.”25af863611159f69

Amber sat beside d0723b6b92 Tennessee, with the 137e594aeb sentiment that he b40724593b was someone impossible c9256930dd to hate. Despite no contact c9aea5ab28 for two years, d84e574e5c his gaze changed 259dbadcfa as soon as 01b0369024 Amber convinced him d8ed70a5f5 of his identity. His expressionless face 9a84d73f35 remained the same, fbdd606f74 but the temperature bef27a747b within had changed. It was no longer e55407a4e4 an observing, guarded look. Amber was certain b8e2f094ca that what Tennessee 0ef968506c felt was unmistakable 91ce2ca8c5 longing, even if 31ac9c4605 he didn’t say c241eef558 it directly.3694b84f0964c647

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Just as Tennessee had 30ae6c9546 seen through his love 6ed9c6fd13 without a single word, 75b5e81ae1 Amber believed he could 2483c8c179 see through Tennessee as f986be84be well.487eab40ec710c35

“How’s your head?”feed8140025f039a

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Tennessee was sparing with words, but Amber didn’t find his silence awkward.c0dc8cc0e9bae4c1

“It’s been a while.”c51adbd0492a83b9

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“It has.”bc2e8f8490459d40

Amber’s words made Tennessee recall a reunion from the past.a344a64cbaa43b6e

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His head was splitting with pain and he couldn’t properly grasp the situation, but Tennessee had unconsciously gone back to that time. It was Chicago. Recalling that moment, his heart felt more at ease. A feeling akin to relief, reassurance.716cddd6b9e4dac1

“Don’t you have anything you want to ask me?”c0de53a621e2d5bd

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“Many things. How you’ve been. What you’ve been doing.”2dbb3f4a5424659d

“Me too. That’s how I felt too.”6a146c2612405e89

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With his chin a70c8da6d1 resting on his 5be56d50ad hand, Amber said 2ed03c9b07 with a bright 1b74469bbe smile,c859c6ea6165c8ca

“But I won’t tell you.”ad88660ad3ba047f

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You hid a lot e550e2f418 from me. Even sold 95d49efabf your house.d24713fb66139511

Amber’s tone was full of resentment. It was the resentment he had momentarily set aside due to the urgency of Tennessee being hurt.e7e93203ce22d4bc

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Looking at Amber smiling as if pleased, Tennessee couldn’t hide his feeling of unfamiliarity. He realized only then that Amber had been sharpening his knife for the entire two years.57786edafe9d97eb

“Have you thought about how I felt when after two years of no contact, I finally hear from you and find you’re in the hospital?”f5220284d07f4773

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“…”51fe204c0e266f8b

Tennessee wondered 97dee95dce if he 6de846f2f9 should remind b46d5b699b Amber that 17bea84209 he was 9c5bb23b16 a patient b002704f29 and that e3086095f1 his recovery 6d680ebddf was the a8e672f26e priority. But Amber’s tone was 348872b74e too calm for that.f4e7d86ffce8a579

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“Can I ask why you sold the house?”90fd38d6fb003955

“I got a job in the UK.”8857fe3d9ba1b8e3

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Amber barely held 874af1dfd7 back the curse 9b9675202f that threatened to 127bb7ceb0 escape. Unbelievable. He went overseas, not f59e47588b just to another state 8e8898f902 but all the way bca121e21a to the UK, and 6ffe6032f5 didn’t say a word.83da55ac2c1cce0d

“Did you read my letters?”47600d8616242f50

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Although he wanted to 790d3455c7 avoid this situation, Tennessee 2db6f1306c told the truth.2d16f5772171fb84

“I did.”a565cc5e78dd76ff

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At this calm answer, c0a47835e9 Amber was consumed by ecc6810ca2 fiery anger and then 13fabd5fe7 deep blue sadness. For a c8538e347f moment, he e59c3a627c felt a 74c1333b0c despair so 73c7068f7d intense that 086c545715 he thought 4315c7e638 he might a1c1d2aad1 collapse.c8a8d71e523fdfed

Tennessee is c018f65431 sick now.He didn’t want to 667cc2dcce burden him with emotions 76d657fd3b he didn’t ask for. Swallowing all of 8c9a53f0a1 it, Amber continued 78946651ab his questions.e8ace39598a0eb9c

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“…How did you get hurt?”5c32ab47c273faaf

“I don’t know.”4490bc039f003357

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And Tennessee kept reaching for his head. The stitched area seemed uncomfortable. At that simple action alone, Amber’s heart melted.He wanted to get angry and demand answers, but this moment was too precious.8d4a1bbb453008b6

He’d save the anger ab5a1702d2 for later. No matter what, 9b57fd6dfc Amber vowed to 19393dcea9 break Tennessee’s habit fc90fc19e5 of disappearing.ba89d524667cbf1f

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As he vented fb602850f0 his frustrations and dc97ffe179 tended to Tennessee, 083656b5c8 the day passed d5a8b625e4 in a flash. It felt 53da3ce080 like he 23f1e76efb had just be52fe2b6e rushed to fdee833ce8 the hospital, 3489895481 but it 09d846a0cb was already 7f89bcfacd late.cd195e24e89a6730

The hospital lights stayed e9926028c1 on late into the bd1976dc92 night, but as time fca5c3d263 passed, the activity gradually 80be76bc78 died down. Since it was a 1269598883 private room, the silence 46cea49350 came even faster.b0489809f2de277d

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The sun had already set. Amber looked at the darkening sky through the window. Tennessee stared at Amber’s back. The sight of Amber silently looking outside reminded Tennessee of the past in Chicago. Amber used to press his face so close to the window that it fogged up, just to look outside.48f4b39df1645548

Amber buried his 9c5c7170ab face in Tennessee’s 0156b53b02 shoulder. Even though it 7f07b1b126 must have hurt, 7521380227 Tennessee, who never b418e68e65 complained, had broad, c176f451a4 firm, and warm 8753d32469 shoulders. It had 128f92e5aa been a 2f0a142983 while since 4a19507277 they’d been bd26aca62f this close, cdafe239ef so Tennessee cc7704b9ed moved his 6f229ba486 shoulder, but 4eb4d6e874 Amber stubbornly 222be230fc kept his 35ab6a3e67 face pressed e1481b1a5b against it.d7e0611efb46ff60

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For Amber, the d895607d43 day had passed c06954d0a8 too quickly. He had e4d6e201b3 alternated between ff413fe72a hope and 845c71bf15 disappointment, anger 45809f0d2b and relief, 15f6bd82b3 leaving him 328d23cde6 emotionally drained. The past 83f13fe2cb two years, 9e90a120a4 and even 0e167b52e2 just today, d94a261945 Tennessee had 0677a51dba shaken him fc816c7909 to his d2937d9465 core. He felt 70b6ebeaaf he deserved 70bb273c04 this as d8ef9169e6 compensation.8e9785f215eb8e0f

“Are you still mad?”698e90f4bd8f4bef

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Tennessee asked, hearing Amber’s sigh.2d916925ed0b956a

“…Yes.”ecd50191a23dfd96

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Amber raised his head, feeling Tennessee’s hand gently touching his hair like a breeze.341339bbcd0492b3

“You’re treating me like a child.”4b042b9f9e596b79

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Despite complaining, Amber didn’t move his head, and his tone wasn’t one of displeasure. Tennessee murmured loud enough to be heard that Amber had certainly grown too big to be treated like a child. Tennessee slowly combed through Amber’s fine hair with his fingers. Watching the hair ripple like a boat’s wake with the movement of his fingertips, Tennessee let out a long breath.631ad43749220a4c

He was recalling Amber’s appearance when he first opened his eyes today. He hadn’t adjusted to it. Amber had grown much taller than himself. His broad shoulders, his voice had changed too. He had passed puberty long ago, but there had still been a lingering sense of youth. Now, there was no trace of that.37cece7beae0dcfd

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He had become an undeniable adult, a man. There was no more of the urgency that came from being swayed one-sidedly or from being overly emotional as before. Tennessee felt the reality of the two years that had passed. This period of two years felt more significant because, unlike before, he hadn’t received any pictures or news.7bf633fec880f85b

***869b45b8068a223c

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Late at 503d4be245 night, while e76c3c4320 Tennessee was 8e13bda80d lost in 753055640d thought, Amber 7327faffb7 tilted his 9e9afdbbc0 head slightly. His manly extended eyes 211c514618 curved gently.736a2650f6bd5d0d

“Did you do well all this time?”a76e74b2f1b2b0d5

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Amber said the question he couldn’t ask earlier in the day, taking advantage of the dawn. In truth, he was very curious. There wasn’t a day when he didn’t think of Tennessee. Amber brought out one by one the things he had yearned for.3fe09771cb593b4e

“No.”ccccfc94618bc51f

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“Because I wasn’t there?”34bafc266c1feeb3

“…”66a68d16f7ed1d43

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His habit of closing his mouth at important times remained the same. Amber laughed softly. He liked even that part of him. Amber didn’t just like something about Tennessee. He simply liked Tennessee.afc0dbb74d1d3bce

“And sleep?”0e97cad702d7f02b

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“Sleeping pills.”75726a53559856db

For many people, medicine was a convenient tool. They make things possible or help us do things that don’t happen naturally. But for Tennessee, they just replaced one pain with another.03ab3dcb52592da4

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“Tennessee, why did you put me as your emergency contact?”1302d20633824478

Tennessee answered by merely shrugging his shoulders. Unlike Amber, Tennessee always lived with his death in mind. It could happen anywhere, anytime, and letting one’s guard down meant death. Successfully completing numerous operations in the past didn’t guarantee survival in the next one. He had to be vigilant at every moment, as if it were the first time. That’s why Tennessee always kept Amber in a corner of his heart. However, he never imagined that Amber’s face, which he kept in his heart, would actually appear in a dangerous situation.6c79db7de2512512

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***ebf390fe730fe2f4

‘I’m really going to die today.’60e5a3978b0717d6

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Camden muttered beside him. Between his words, Camden spitted out the juice from chewing tobacco. Saying he’s going to die is Camden’s habit. The weather is bad—I’m going to die. The subject of protection is uncooperative—I’m going to die, that kind of thing. Camden came from a special forces background, but for someone who had frequently faced death, he was overly dramatic.3487d8dcecd3f0e0

‘Which of the world’s top companies was it again?’09a5d32ceb77c7a6

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‘3.’5ce9aaf4fd90259f

The protection subject was the sole heir to one of the world’s three largest oil companies. Despite his young age, there were already many people targeting the child.aea9c547b2031788

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‘You don’t have a single complaint even in this situation?’79a5128eec1a55c1

Camden, who was about to playfully hit Tennessee’s shoulder, met his eyes and awkwardly lowered his hand.4a15149fae7f96d1

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‘You have a kid, right? That’s why you’re doing this job, they say.’44fe123ec4416560

Camden couldn’t hide his curiosity.43281f09d0229d97

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‘No kid.’5c077b251febb3b4

‘Then what’s that picture?’0dc4fff61046a7e8

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What Camden was 59df1c9a91 referring to was 520141fee5 a single photograph 446bbfd6d0 that Tennessee carried. It was a picture fe0d568e33 of Amber in the a45e1816d7 center, hugging Annie and 178307bd02 Cody.894564880db52c3f

‘Partner.’b07c9c0776601b3b

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‘What? Your partner’s kid?’ad9f45381a4240fb

Tennessee said nothing more to Camden, who didn’t understand.415caf79c8df0f00

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‘Didn’t get much sleep, huh?’c3d71f7bb9743bb8

‘None of your business.’c18e8bc8d60ed713

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Rather than sleep… maybe I’m truly exhausted,Tennessee thought.a904fd9c70c28857

‘Watching you, I think you’ll die before me. Anyway, make sure you leave a will for your kid!’c904601b575570af

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“Kid” … He did know one.0b2d81ea861f7a30

At Camden’s words, Tennessee briefly thought of the kid.be0d42963262e5f2

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‘Clayton.’c947ee90acfe288d

At the f6058737aa call urging 2d1e0b8323 him to ac7e691eea follow orders, 87de589f68 Tennessee came d5420109e8 to his a760999032 senses and beb3e74cde moistened his b0b2bda1f4 dry lips 65f0e9629b with his 08886c330a tongue.8ec492dff8f5a945

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This protection subject 636f0c255b was similar to 91be84e0e6 Amber in age dd56ac9d2e and build. It wasn’t that Tennessee f0303b4f5a had a preferred type cbe21aad61 to protect, but he 2ce822d68b didn’t like kids of 8433a2b71a this age. It reminded 3a1f094150 him of cba87c4939 his first 9f40e1e986 meeting with 0196beab9b Amber. They had nothing in ee2d4c4f14 common except for their bfe4037c68 nationality. Ah, there was one 8b24c1062e more thing. When treated kindly, 5fe8d519f5 his face would b29d7b2da3 light up brightly. Whether it was unwrapping 279c652aba candy for him or e40c9be4dd doing small favors, he 25871eded0 visibly appreciated it. That was 6cd0125080 also like 0c16d1b3ef Amber.873a335695486dad

Looking back, Amber 67f1bcf8ee was happy about b530b50230 such trivial things.8dedaf07d210f568

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‘Ready?’5dcfeb0af3f34649

Tennessee checked the road signals. Even if he survived intact today, after today’s mission ends, tomorrow’s would come, and after that, another would follow.909fb4a21708581e

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Suddenly, an uncontrollable d015bc0843 fatigue swept over 5e91e215c8 him.42486ecad52366d8

And Tennessee blamed the ed770d31a4 innocent fatigue for the f42fa829d7 mission going wrong. Applying pressure 437ca6c3a2 to his 78e8772e08 bleeding leg, 49cc200376 Tennessee wondered 1513fa4eae if the 4b8ba0c666 haziness in 653318dcdb his head e26dd56d0f was due 8fae0beb1f to losing 54742feb3f too much cf71c3a5ef blood, fatigue, 04b59c2a8a or lack 20ba0573ab of sleep.It could be all 712bfebcff three, he thought.c47871c7c9a42e0e

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Gunshots rang out cad2ab8ad4 not too far 4528bbc892 away. They were gradually f561a8e389 getting closer.6576b6d2c08e3cc9

He had lost too 45f130d6a5 much blood and his ed4362c541 mind was hazy. He leaned the back e318591820 of his head against d8ee4c6ae8 the cold wall. The gunshots were 3fb9c13660 similar to the c7f800247c sound of fireworks. When he was 85f9773f0f young, he was 06c0407d21 more familiar with 055d96d08f gunshots than fireworks, 76786f7de0 so every July 58507461da 4th, when fireworks 63e7d60ef7 were set off, 80feb77b3e he would curl 4bfa360110 up in bed. It was as 5a92c61aa5 if bullets had 9886fcf7e9 seeped in like ce6af8c846 shadows with those 99d5264254 firework sounds.a963b6f3133f10c4

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In fact, 0d56818725 the next adecef845c day, stories 25095756fd would circulate b6c8090f0d about some 7237f5cf2e gang member 0314b2816f or someone 393848e036 in the 639a3f9ac4 neighborhood dying.6f8ff1f62fe6c82c

Ah, I really can’t think straight.68d88acb683cf336

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To gather his 424ca76314 dim rationality, Tennessee ee66a01b9e wiped his forehead 81ae4482f8 several times. HHe had to 3b90238a53 live—it felt almost 7db66a6404 like an obligatory ef12dcaa2e thought. Since he d34aab25b6 couldn’t die, 517232e365 he had a66eefbc7a to live. There had to be 90ed43818a a way. It felt 99d99f8596 like fulfilling a44719c2d6 the bare c173235804 minimum of 5d61461a21 his responsibility 474818000f to himself.c4791042e652493e

In front 492e38d267 of him, cb982f3b2e Camden lay 839f14da6a fallen with 6e4a41e096 empty eyes. Life had already 901e6eb070 left those eyes, c3add34858 leaving them hollow. After all his talk b17230ae01 about wills, he was 60bfe84f45 the first to have d388fd0bef the back of his 513be875ea head blown off.51863ee8f415e725

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Now the gunshots could be heard right in front of him. He had lost so much blood that he couldn’t even grip the gun in his hand.edbc0e4537e88146

Is this how 828fb13dff I die?9ebaede1e86c6768

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So be it.2f8b04ec616e9642

Now that 685e96def0 I think 8ad590fa91 about it, d589300c4b it doesn’t 794a57d7d9 seem so ae5344d190 bad.a15c4da97e5067ce

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Tennessee let out a long sigh. Every time he turned his head forward, he faced the piece of flesh that was once Camden. With his arms drooping, Tennessee closed his eyes. Camden’s words repeated.e4700d1a5004b545

‘You have a kid, right? That’s why you’re doing this job.’d79ceec1090aa2ef

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Bang!2c7122cabfb0b2c0

The moment fireworks 9478b5173b exploded right behind 388372403f the wall he b59b8e9b28 was leaning on,030b45b500264a50

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Tennessee suddenly realized.63e6b9d62cd614c4

He hadn’t told Amber he was going to leave him.dfd8f98292b1e8cf

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If he died somewhere away from home, or if he was unlucky enough not to survive, he thought he should definitely let Amber know, but he remembered that he hadn’t done so.c491f89971bb6c17

It felt 9438abdd9a too empty 75da48d1d7 to close 3af6ffcf64 his eyes 2fe88d3264 like this. There was still so 9a101c9804 much to do.bd01c423f3747e21

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He worried that Amber 70ff5fc279 might never forget him 014b9a08e1 and spend a lifetime a4c780186a searching for him.d577f24dbc6e19e8

***f7ea8a798e9a4383

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“Why didn’t you reply?”0e655e24bb4e9fb2

There was no other emotion in the questioning tone now. Amber asked calmly and waited for Tennessee’s answer.05ab85e691666064

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“…I don’t know.”0b892f990b96c7f9

“Was it because of me? Did I make you uncomfortable?”cd1c8dc3373de709

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“A little.”d568efe9a77499ce

“Then you ran away. From me.”26eb962d5f16321c

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While reading the letter, and listening to Amber’s words today, Tennessee realized how deep and wide Amber’s resentment was. Tennessee didn’t make excuses either. He felt that this was all from seeds he had sown.426a90ca70439d9b

“Ever heard the word coward?”2a3be0313755fcde

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Tennessee smiled and shook 797bd8d237 his head. Amber smiled along. The upturned 3d041ea04a corners of 6975240253 his mouth b605193823 were similar 6953689dfa to before 82152b53ba yet different.96e460393a5ec803

“I know it must have been confusing. I know it wasn’t easy to accept.”e4b4809e9cf86bbe

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And Amber added.d133adcb788612fe

“But I think I’m going to make you even more uncomfortable from now on, Tennessee.”5b2de677e624759b

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As the hand stroking his head didn’t stop, Amber gradually fell asleep. It had been a tiring and hectic day for him. While touching the black hair, Tennessee couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.3b402c71e7004051

Running away, huh…33c4d8ee963952eb

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He isn’t entirely wrong.7ecdb5afad5cc8c4

“Happy birthday, adult Amber.”0fd2e1eefd3e3db0

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Half-asleep, Amber 88187d9ea9 curled his 137dc6d752 lips into e715f8f157 a smile. Though his 9413539915 face looked 3d460a4202 entirely different, 449be350be Tennessee thought 501fee9b0d the way 099b45317e he smiled 08f85c5a32 resembled him 142529a690 in some c7d91fb7c6 way.995bdadffd8ecb4d

“Thank you.”7620ec78b31ba1bd

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Amber replied while falling 2cc1c5c2a5 asleep, keeping his anger afeca53a65 and sadness carefully hidden. Amber had now 3ae3eae0e6 learned to speak 36e696a77e in such a 44815b161e tone.ed7a249a31cbd2ef

A suspicion crossed Tennessee’s mind that Amber might be a little glad he was injured.bc6e3ac029cecef8

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After all, while providing 9e6f22ecfc the troublesome and demanding bc601f3821 nursing care, Amber seemed 5898f1c35b genuinely happy. He never procrastinated, complained, ae39c81520 or frowned. He was always a 7607d7e708 step ahead, offering help b5f21efdba and reaching out. Even for things Tennessee 0d23c85a4f could do himself.4602201add441176

Tennessee was someone who was used to doing everything alone. It wasn’t different even when he was lying in the hospital. Two more surgeries were scheduled, so it would be a long journey until recovery. He had tried to adapt his body to prepare for this, but Amber didn’t give him the chance.3b6915c3619cfc15

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I can do f6016cd1df it.b112a0c53cfffb25

Whenever he tried d2446d8742 to say those 3cb83b86a9 words to Amber 706f94eef7 bringing him a 44a181dbc5 water bottle, Amber 356e35528d would say countless b2b68c9c50 things with just 458f30a0c5 his eyes. In that gaze, he 0b49423105 seemed to hear hallucinations f8cc265610 like‘Tennessee ran away from me, ran away… ran… 2 years… letter…’ So Tennessee couldn’t say anything.f30db834d1e47709

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The doctor couldn’t find the exact cause of Tennessee’s prosopagnosia, only that it was likely due to the impact to his head during the car crash.5d5a2fd540e001c5

But Tennessee acted so naturally that Amber didn’t notice his prosopagnosia. Tennessee distinguished and remembered people in ways other than his faces. Intonation, accessories, unique hairstyles, habits, and such were his clues.574e1716be54bd38

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Amber concluded that it was possible because Tennessee’s perception was incredibly sharp. There were identical twins among the medical staff, and Tennessee could distinguish between him too. When asked how, Tennessee answered, ‘Their walking styles are different.’ Amber couldn’t hide his amazement.17050c4b7a141698

After a few days, Tennessee could recognize Amber well too. Although it seemed he still couldn’t recognize faces, he didn’t give him a strange look even when Amber came in wearing different clothes.393cd40517692837

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How do you recognize 6322767f5e me?411549bfaa9c13ee

When Amber asked, Tennessee just said, “I just do.” Amber playfully asked if he was refusing to tell, but for Tennessee, that was the best answer he could give. Tennessee just recognized Amber. Faces weren’t always necessary to recognize people. Tennessee was confident that even when he first opened his eyes in the hospital, if given time, he would have recognized Amber even without explanation.0e8cb97757bce5a8

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On the third day, Elizabeth and David visited. After being explained who they were, Tennessee greeted them, but Amber noticed that Tennessee couldn’t recognize their faces. While Elizabeth, who was a doctor, had a long and difficult conversation with the attending doctor after hearing about Tennessee’s condition, Tennessee sat quietly watching him. Beside him, David was crying, and Amber’s siblings, Cody and Annie, who had become middle school students by now, were absorbed in his smartphones, seemingly used to his father crying.f6901000501a58a0

Tennessee left the comment that it was ‘quiet but chaotic,’ and Amber burst into laughter upon hearing that small mutter.7f5319c79f6886a1

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“Ryker, why are you laughing?”5404fb99c2780a29

While David was wiping his tears, Amber’s siblings asked as he belatedly took out balloons. They were balloons with the message ‘Get well soon!’a4aa724d14d74ea9

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Cody and Annie, Amber’s siblings, waited for Tennessee to say something first, but Tennessee only briefly said thank you.26f4fa87221a59b5

Although Cody and a24a2d345b Annie were generally aec365be9c outgoing and sociable, 51fe92c51e they had an 134ea7a890 awkward relationship specifically d52195448d with Tennessee. This was partly 74531c103f because young Amber 46d967d103 had desperately tried 3de114f075 to interfere in 5cf52b110f his relationship, but 47d94a79d4 also because Tennessee 76e3092ff3 was equally indifferent 32e0920c18 to all children.b755e3fbe03c41c3

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Amber couldn’t help but laugh watching them staring blankly at each other. Then he recalled a memory from the past.c0777b6796245a90

Before going 24a29478da on a 9d32938c8c trip to fbf651136f Florida, on befe15a797 the day d5d3fec424 Tennessee visited 6943974dbf Michigan. Annie had gestured ae447ee35d to Tennessee to 2feed235ad pick her up. Amber, jealous without c75029a5d8 even knowing why abab62b71a he was jealous, 5362a649a7 was about to d559891432 say no, but 6fe0c4b483 there was no 2172e19f6e need.87300661d12c1c48

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Tennessee didn’t pick Annie up. He just patted the small head with a gaze that was neither frightening nor cold. Although the rejected Annie grabbed Tennessee’s pants and cried, Tennessee only comforted her moderately without hugging her.42408e6fde44e99d

Amber smiled with satisfaction. Tennessee was indifferent to everyone, but Amber didn’t mind that at all.f9f6bc04bbd66546

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As Tennessee had guessed, Amber was making good use of this moment. Of course, Amber didn’t want Tennessee to be sick at all, but what could be done about it now that he was?e2533adc05f783d3

Above all, 6c2d91d61d he was cc57b6ac7e happy to db82b7220d have Tennessee 75a6be6a19 all to 74599efc10 himself. Tennessee was always busy, 4cbc2704b2 and though he occasionally c3722b0651 made time to be 161dbe3d2c with Amber, it didn’t 5caa8b1826 happen frequently. They would spend e2d16aa2d7 weekends together once 1e9e42979d every few months.1d53dc897c024997

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Now Tennessee was 114380034a severely injured and 4c82b45a7d it might take f250802ba7 at least six f55e9e6507 months or even 23bd9ae039 longer until his 5e8ab233d6 complete recovery, so 64d393fef7 it became possible bc605c55f7 for him to 0931fd6d73 spend a long 9115ac0c1d time with Tennessee 4776274089 for the first a28607d4f3 time.5837f8259c35f22c

And surprisingly to Amber, Tennessee was quite an obedient patient. Following the doctor’s orders not to move his arm, Tennessee stopped trying to do things by himself. Now Tennessee entrusted almost everything to Amber. Sometimes he would just stare at Amber silently. Then Amber would hand over a water bottle or give his medicines in a small paper cup.86254e3a8db4ccb9

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Not only was he receiving help, but he was leaning on Amber. He didn’t want Tennessee to be injured, but this moment was sweet enough to make Amber feel guilty. He definitely wished for Tennessee’s quick recovery though, even if Tennessee would leave again as soon as he got better. Amber let this guilt flow to the very bottom.71dd08e6c12ba87c

“Are you sleepy?”0bb9a79c73ef306f

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Tennessee slept a 45b53cff6f lot. He spent most 67f4290ac4 of the day c552314c2f sleeping.683c6e1e9d9d541e

Amber quietly 8155017585 sat beside c2a71aeb19 Tennessee, thinking c1eccef78b it might e103e19018 be due 580c7f92f9 to the f78224f772 painkillers, but 6b904452cb maybe he 088091137c had been eaf5a93108 very tired d3a3bb8a34 all this 93545ae542 time.d6a1da3a5eb431bf

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“I wish you’d tell me how you’ve been all this time.”3a7dd843e6ca4641

Focus returned to Tennessee’s eyes as he drowsily moved his eyelids.058dbd506304c8cf

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“It wasn’t much different from America.”9228e3f3d294968f

Tennessee’s voice, drunk with sleepiness, was very low. Amber nodded while resting his chin on his hand.afb95163c8b98592

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“Tennessee.”314f12067cbc9481

“Yeah?”3148e7e34eecf828

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“When you get better, are you thinking of leaving me again?”fb77c53c2bc3bf43

Blue eyes met his. Tennessee couldn’t answer easily. He hadn’t told Amber, but Amber was Tennessee’s legal heir. The company kept his notarized will. That’s why Amber was contacted following procedure when Tennessee was severely injured.6918dbdb3f02cd13

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Tennessee hadn’t expected this reunion. It had been a comfortable and natural meeting, but one he hadn’t prepared for.1a8207546b6ec0f1

“You don’t have to.”a0d48df5f158af39

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Tennessee thought 207131f772 that the 63758901b4 original Amber 9a9cd907f5 would have 049daae04d begged him 9b50b2d17c not to. When Tennessee first ddff45c685 met Amber, he 9d06a6dd73 was eleven years da1e3e9aff old. Much time had 30729639b6 passed since then, 8829a44b83 but it had 785e5160d8 never felt this 072e8ba68a unfamiliar. Tennessee was 1745338c1b confused and 2243eec869 couldn’t adapt. He felt the 563a8799e6 changes with every 332c7add47 moment they spent 257311b331 together.e2ded7c0b8558e95

Amber no 8a2aad898c longer begged d40e5ff645 him. Though his tone might da9586f96d sound like pleading, the a3078a589a message contained in his fbb2fc1e1a persuasive words was different.3f99c72fd176804a

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“Were you fine all those 2 years without me?”435fa08666eb4a9b

Just as 6a803d5c9e Amber had ea4be55bc1 gone through 506ef70310 many changes a02cdabf5c during those d8bdc32e07 2 years, a02b644f2c many things e3ff625628 had happened d1c82bc76a to Tennessee a901b0949c too. During those 2 c236e4c844 years, the days eead5c9b61 Tennessee had proper a08702d979 sleep could be 9669a18fb9 counted on one b16ecb7f21 hand. He was 536441a1d8 used to 5b935d6277 his chronic c6bd3c6371 insomnia, but e1e7893b1e there were 599ba4f330 moments that 1240b91a73 suddenly came 118eb6e95b to mind, 2502a84296 like the 79ec36f7f9 young Amber a84f6b0cd9 who used e087d35d24 to desperately 03dba20463 interlock his a23c2a3344 fingers with e2fe11f99d his when af126c6727 he opened 1155953184 his eyes.3c4976fff479eded

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Loving a young Amber baed9aa539 was out of the 072c3b16c9 question, and Tennessee’s feelings b881aa0be7 on that remained firm. But now, the adult 944cff6e8c Amber was smiling at 516ec556bd him, asking how the 9b35994465 time without him had 26e0b336aa been. His cynical remarks were cb3af8ddc3 the same, but they 771f9b2709 came from a changed 6e5266411c Amber, one whose heart 83272db6be would never waver.da6be27e31d99c96

“Sleep, Tennessee.”5ff3acbb8a1ec04f

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At those 9da5ad1429 words, Tennessee b3f9add934 fell into 4811823b3c a deep 2afc251fa0 sleep as 7e6196f81b if by 422d7635f1 magic.a96e8ddfe5de1b16

As if 49d6fdb3ee making the 8106b78d02 two years 1ce9522362 meaningless.566865f39d8594f4

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***367f8534d1110db5

Tennessee’s first surgery ended successfully. Originally, he should have stayed in the ICU for 24 hours, but due to his good progress, he was moved to a general ward after 12 hours.8d99ffb899b2dc51

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When he 9a0f7bf4b1 was moved ef9b762255 back to e697f9f49a his original ea99207eb2 room, Tennessee b3f57bef55 was asleep. Amber held e0e5239240 his cold, 7e4c4cc66c stiff hand 140c13bda7 by his 9236516d43 side. Tennessee woke up a fe15b0e4be few hours later.0e03b96372ac885c

Rather than being 879db0d68e completely conscious, it 9f4feaae4f was more like 988f77f5b2 briefly waking up. Tennessee stared at Amber bc790bb233 by his side for bd1925cade a long while and 185d48e296 blinked several times. It took some time d3aa85f8f4 for him to recognize 228b25a5e0 that it was Amber.e9665a31cf38051f

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“If you’re sleepy, sleep some more.”92b44cc4020fdc12

Tennessee shook his 3fe6c6da8c head.ddeb47a4b58289e6

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“I’m sleepy, but it’s weird.”2bc912c2174b860c

“It’s the painkillers.”bdf09ee2fc014ac0

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Although his words 7692b66e89 were meant to 95c69dc909 be reassuring, Tennessee 75fd83a151 raised his head.92ce55f98c7b07d9

“…Is it morphine?”7e1458b58cc86b8c

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Tennessee looked 01eccf7b77 at his 4ceae8e57e IV needle 28b75ef1d7 and held 97b487fede his head. It was d9d500ceea the first 05f4c4942a time Tennessee 6e479b1358 had felt de8919ec39 this dizzy.bcf012511835bba1

“Yes, it’s a morphine drip.”05c6bac61aeac3eb

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“…Take it out.”d40a668e94889c7e

Since it hadn’t been long since he came out of surgery, it would definitely hurt without painkillers. Amber shook his head, but Tennessee was firm.e5d993e74cd2768d

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“Take it out, I don’t want it.”a16c4c923cb18272

However, he couldn’t just remove the IV needle at will. Amber looked at the drip and first adjusted the roller clamp.78a7b5f466a8f1b4

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“Tell him I want different painkillers, not morphine.”1cc35ce38ce9dfa5

“…Is it because it’s opium?”208cdfec3274658c

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Although it was extracted from opium, morphine was a painkiller. It wasn’t a synthesized organic compound like ecstasy.40686df50e041bbd

“No, because my head hurts.”59df566dbec221fd

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But Amber detected Tennessee’s deep aversion and rejection towards drugs. Tennessee sighed.d7bfc833f8467c68

Tennessee wasn’t that rigid about everything. He knew well enough that this was morphine prescribed by doctors in the hospital. But things invented for convenience were consistently misused. Xanax, diazepam, zolpidem… the list was endless.a83e89fb57cb2733

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His mother had done drugs that way too. From marijuana to cocaine, heroin, and even long Xanax bars. It wasn’t just paranoia. Tennessee himself often wondered if he might be inherently vulnerable to addiction.2ca87fdf490b64ba

“But you’ll be in pain.”53a3bbca3a8a26ec

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The pain 60dbf39e7c was better.da88636e26e707c4

Tennessee was afraid. As far as 870f21964f he knew, bad cf09336243 things were inherited. Disease, poverty, and addiction. When he 097b94e222 saw his 622667a05c eyes clouded 96da43aaa2 by drugs, b593ba46ce he would d3067a3313 fall into a9956c53f5 hallucinations of 34aac0e090 standing in 8f300a19af his place, 9d7a31df59 looking in eabf06b820 the mirror.2bcaecf1d2d24eec

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“I’ll go call the doctor.”41c699d1a69e2e97

After confirming that 47db36a059 no more morphine f825170e20 was dripping, Amber 37432f7292 got up.5e3c7384515ac2e5

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“Stay with me, Amber.”2a4a38ad76884801

Bound by that small request, Amber couldn’t move. Though it was a simple call, it had resonance. Small words flowed from Tennessee’s mouth as he covered his eyes with the back of his hand.49bd696bf77593f1

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“Then I’ll be able to sleep even if it hurts.”5dadaf0749fa5176

Amber sometimes 7be59d55ef had hallucinations 8ec476886a of being dc3c6b20e7 caught in 659aa7142f a storm. It happened especially when eba36bbdb3 he was with Tennessee. At Tennessee’s words, 5cdc4de21d his face flushed 950259c71a red, and he f42162922d sweated under the d8ecac06ff scorching sun, sometimes 392d7a087a shrinking from the 10960ee2e4 gusts.d39f0b9de53e1d1a

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If Tennessee aea051260c knew about b589a15e9f these burning 2cb6249a9d feelings, would d124dda9f4 he run 73e3308074 away again?36976f58576a864c

Amber closed ae13f86bc0 his eyes b55f0fb55f and thought.42af72b9cf1b3782

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After hearing the doctor’s advice, Tennessee’s “I’ll do it myself” disappeared. No matter what anyone said, Tennessee tended to listen well to the doctor’s advice. Both Tennessee and Amber recognized the severity of the situation when told that he needed more rest, especially since it hadn’t been long since the surgery.2787ef99e2d94fbb

But Tennessee felt restless, and although he didn’t show it, Amber noticed. It was understandable. Tennessee’s daily routine consisted only of sleep, meals, and washing up. It became more apparent as the time he spent awake grew longer.ed5855a85ddca1af

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After getting the okay b210a0f286 for short walks, Amber 40f1f9fe4f brought a wheelchair. Though it 6c00e8c99b wasn’t easy b5d0fdefd5 due to 2d27eb1b0d his broken 2840f5f580 limbs, Tennessee d6a745d9ae managed to 480e776af3 get into 33105089fd the wheelchair.ad5573b0dbf4da49

After going 46c15b086a around the d2ef82568d ward once, 0008dac4b8 Amber was 29a2ddf33e in the 8197679119 process of 50ae2c66dc putting away 1e244e2d99 the wheelchair.3b4a8c24649ec7ff

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Someone knocked on 8594fc9478 the hospital room 75ec7376a4 door.10dd3a7000455d8e

There stood men a8b4428b8d who were similar ac3e184348 in build to 3e08478809 Amber but much f514a0c4cf more similar in bd15601bd4 demeanor to Tennessee. They were all 17c5c22a6e wearing suits. As Amber tensed and 912d7ee394 tried to press the 72b6c9c017 call button, Tennessee shook 9eaae4dc95 his head.645eca8811f35308

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“How are you feeling?”58a55b17a04b3a50

It was a posh accent. The man who noticed Amber’s slightly furrowed brow made a polite but clear request for him to leave. He was very polite with his words, but it was essentially an order. The other two men in suits seemed to be bodyguards. Since Tennessee and these men appeared to know each other, Amber started to get up.cef9c41ff6d97efc

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“Stay here.”3aab330a89d32d4a

It had been a while since he heard ‘stay here.’ These men didn’t seem to mind much if Amber stayed, so he said nothing more. And not long after, someone else appeared. To Amber’s eyes, ‘appeared’ was exactly the right word.659e72b8a298913d

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It was a 62517e2dbf blonde boy who 4ea9461726 looked to be bda8a70544 in the higher 356c0874cf grades of elementary 5994b2a940 school.4d05607a15d99dc0

…He’s not his son, right? He’s blonde though. While thinking this person didn’t seem like someone who would visit Tennessee’s hospital room, the same British accent as the earlier man flowed out. The boy calmly expressed his gratitude and mentioned sacrifice and hard work.39f351de540d002a

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Amber felt an explosion of jealousy that hadn’t been triggered since ‘that woman’ in Chicago. As he continued listening, the missing pieces of the story came together. Amber made a small ‘ah’ sound. Tennessee had been protecting this British boy.227d854e8145ef59

“I’m glad you’re safe.”70646c4ca344e876

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Tennessee said that quietly, and Amber smiled to hide his doubled jealousy at the completed puzzle pieces. Tennessee had thrown himself in harm’s way to protect this child from those trying to kidnap him for ransom.15130eb229e04708

It was 53e8bba9d4 just work, 0420404bba right?dbaeb4b0373e2714

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Amber consoled himself this way, but the young boy – vulnerable, honest – somehow reminded him of his younger self, and Amber hated that fact terribly. Tennessee was already hard enough to win over as it was.421a6fa812f15ae7

Maybe it was because Tennessee was such a dry person, but Amber seriously worried that he had a power to attract similarly dry people. If not for that, how could this noble boy come here and elaborate on how ‘we’ll cover the hospital expenses so don’t worry and please focus on recovering, thank you so much’?69669e6f63ae5b16

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With his 81fef4c2c1 expression controlled 6c435daa8c but feeling 18d114c342 quite sulky 9665991af1 inside, Amber 3eaafcc2f8 crossed his 10ca21ef4a arms.0cf7e74f5be089ca

The boy wiped his tears and reached toward Tennessee’s hand on the bed. He seemed to want to hold it.522b8f23a58c4c6e

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Just as f1ba1c9cad Amber was bc4f30fec5 about to 4578351ae3 wonder if 75a9975171 he needed d9c97d5ed8 to be 3a38250cfe jealous even 25ff5f1e17 of a 37ec7ac4b0 child, as db9a8a8b1b the boy 5cded52b32 reached out, c29d3018e2 Tennessee naturally 473335d507 moved his 94196ee17b own hand 5626930845 toward Amber.dff7350a072f1307

Tennessee’s left arm, which wasn’t in a cast, pointed to the water bottle. As if not even seeing the boy’s hand that had lost its destination.c5b6239cc26e4b84

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“I’ll contact you again.”83ddff2581e2b922

“I plan to rest until I recover.”4a51986fff91cdf2

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“Mr. Clayton, after you recover-”e9ebce575778e789

“Even if the surgery is successful, I won’t be the same as before the accident. I’m not sure if I’ll be a useful head of security.”ed5f40f4ec9db983

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Well done, Tennessee!f4915bd616b61e06

Amber, who was adb3ad388c about to hand a879c97915 over the water d37fb2a0d6 bottle, changed his c5b1befe80 mind. Instead of putting it 2b89c08500 in his hand, he e4fd9877c7 opened the cap and bc2a9727b8 held it to his 186724d1f4 lips. Though he expected e1a9109cf6 him to say 665ca7936f something, Tennessee quietly 2aa5b8fb45 drank the water.2dff66ecdd34eaae

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Beautiful. Perfect. I love him so much, I feel like I’m going to go crazy.afaf6238636905e4

Amber learned that when 2a3c49a5e2 your heart beats too eaa0050ee4 fast, the pulsing can 5b88a58519 travel all the way 2fffd49b6d to your feet.d03eba14c7e5077d

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Amber was busy.8612a720ec99db72

To Tennessee, it seemed like he didn’t need to be so actively diligent, but Amber moved without a moment’s rest. With someone of such large build moving back and forth in a single room, it somehow made the hospital room feel packed. Because his face felt unfamiliar, Tennessee rubbed his eyelids and opened his eyes.9bd45bc014f65000

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Although his voice had become much lower and thicker, it was possible to recognize it because traces of Amber’s distinctive voice from the past remained. As for the height, since he’d said he would grow a lot, it wasn’t that surprising. But who knew not being able to recognize a face could make someone seem so different.fe4b06fb4072d257

Every time d793ed86a5 he saw  6e256cd1f7 him, Tennessee 9c77c3e3f7 felt like f688ed1912 he was 740f6f1c51 meeting a 77b7f2ad5a stranger.4114f4c871f5aa28

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Especially when he c9a40aeea9 first opened his 5287273fee eyes. Tennessee recalled 818dcc70ea that moment 7921fe3940 with a 9313c5e933 bitter laugh.0e01aec15cb888f8

A man with an incredulous face was looking at him, and Tennessee instinctively moved his hand to search for his gun. But the feel of the bed sheets was different and – of course – there was no revolver. His first thought was how to subdue this man.c9d8e8f559af2975

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‘Amber. I’m Amber.’60b9687bb94b7032

His foggy 86e68ccbf6 head seemed 7e9c0e66fa to clear.Amber…? You?f50ea5b4c33019dc

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Although the face was 2a62019367 clearly different from the c474502d5e one he knew, he a320725ba3 felt relieved. But prosopagnosia made one b03ad5e031 somewhat tired. It makes you stay 47cdd641bb vigilant and tense every c5501f74c8 time.3b49c2e78b412d7c

While he could recognize Amber now, the first few days were difficult, and honestly, he still hadn’t adjusted to his current face. It felt new and like a different person every time. Except for the scar, nothing remained as Tennessee remembered. To the point where he wondered if he was being deceived.241c86ee36ffd353

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Tennessee shook his head 44ec0426ca at thoughts that even 55ee212b14 he felt were foolish 9b4f7cc905 and inefficient.Who would go d7fbd1b19f to such effort 18b2c10697 and expense to 8e548f1305 deceive me? What am I b8d3ad5560 worth?And if someone really cb5668ff27 wanted to deceive him, c5eb3cc80f there must have been 5a767ada7b many people who could 9711d37bab act similar to how 8bd0d319b2 Amber used to be, dbb932a787 but now he was f80a777119 too convincingly different.5fe8012fe50404f1

“Amber, my cigarettes.”b4bd0bab6e42028f

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Amber, who was organizing the drawer, took out cigarettes from his coat pocket. They were Tennessee’s cigarettes. Amber took out one cigarette from the pack and brought it to his lips. As he tried to take it with his lips, Amber pulled his hand back. When Tennessee, frowning, raised his chin again, the hand holding the cigarette moved away again.bc9b420597ecbaba

“This is a non-smoking area.”fe037b0d0c6c26b3

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“We can go outside.”fe0a166fbadbfe65

“I’ll bring the wheelchair.”45bd43fc572693f1

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Amber, smiling ba2db5f045 gently, seemed f15a2145fb to turn 208c75a0c0 around but c4e4eb7c94 then said 5a18ef8d1f this.3dab8999413b946c

“Oh, right, you’re not allowed to go out. The doctor said not to go outside because it’s bad for your immune system.”f8fef573fcb7e0e9

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Tennessee sighed. He had another surgery 54b9e36ffd ahead of him, and d8c857a041 since no doctor in 473e362c22 the 21st century would e40375252a recommend smoking, the smoking 603b05b679 ban was inevitable. In front c193f1c08d of the 320ccd8fb4 resigned Tennessee, 4fcef0e298 Amber smiled 74df80f4cf playfully and 7961d57cb1 held the bcebfce8ce cigarette. Then he snapped the 215de2af37 cigarette in half right ec737e1d74 in front of his 9680357262 eyes. The tobacco fell ddf4092420 apart.e023d43fc91d3bb1

Did he have this bca1529b54 much resentment toward me, 544d4061f0 or does he want 176c3fb037 to pick a fight ef04cf6dfc with me now?4023e2ebfded76a2

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While the nicotine-craving patient was pondering this, Amber’s face showed clear satisfaction for anyone to see.920f99a41ae5c4de

“Have this instead.”26326d1b5c4c4cc1

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Then Amber rummaged through ed70a9ea2b his pocket and took 4f7643e6ef something out. Tennessee picked up 91c2ef2eea the things that f3d2e388c7 fell in front 1fb594ef67 of him with 7f3c109ff9 a rustling sound.b878b1eef2ca4d78

Tootsie roll.ae2548ee4c07ab93

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It was 550a73a48b dark brown 57a79c82a7 taffy candy.7a56d94f1780e698

“I bought these on purpose. The color looks just like it might match your ruined alveoli from smoking too much.”e530735e6c34db3b

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It really is him.f55ef0bc97c8db17

With his functioning aef020022b left hand, Tennessee 0a17072fdd swatted away the fc10b41130 candies.5918fd75f002b0d0

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With all the 81a8ef90cf nursing, Amber had bc45378dc2 been getting tired ee1e7ab5d4 and falling asleep 9f0cc10c08 more often lately. Tennessee clicked 79d7eb8f75 his tongue. It was 4cdfa25bb4 only natural, c97882ed9f with how 68c0c2d58e busy he 25c420e4ed was taking ae7b2b7d2c care of 456e7d630d him, doing ecf04f4b22 everything else 93b76f01f1 too.01a5259e45fc9272

Amber tried to 45ccaffc21 handle various paperwork 07a5c80bdb as well. Tennessee needed 455a254270 to deal 2a44b41e68 with hospital 02619c10ce documents, bills 4cb58236cd and emails, abd13c1229 and even 03e89249df real estate 6857e14418 matters, and e3d3b02cae Amber pestered a5cac9b80e him saying 13f69fb0ff he wanted 70ca28dd4d to help. He became even e3d94e88bf more insistent after ee0113756c learning that Tennessee 17848b68ed was planning to 825f9ba8b0 buy a house fa7e22af9a in Chicago.1ec93c0229a6b3c6

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Tennessee had 263ce17b1b decided to 4098d2137e settle in d9f686f922 Chicago right 35a65dcb8e after hearing 5ae2ecdaee from the c8c35b597c doctor about dcd31347d5 his recovery 6d81d63b43 progress.0fc9619957f371d9

‘When you have brain surgery, the brain swells. It takes at least 6 months for the brain swelling to go down. That’s the minimum. It can take up to a year.’3ebeb18891630211

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Instead of security work, he’d have to do office work as a security consultant like before. Or maybe just resting wouldn’t be bad either, the thought crossed Tennessee’s mind. A year would pass quickly enough. Since it wouldn’t be financially difficult, it wasn’t an unreasonable thought.8833399e20801bed

‘And it takes a long time for bones to heal too. While the discharge won’t take long, complete recovery will.’e20daa349b900768

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So of course Amber enthusiastically welcomed Tennessee’s plan to settle in Chicago for the time being. Though it was a strange mix of anger and welcome.a054a328c799d71c

‘Where are you going to go?’d73d301dff15b150

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‘Probably Chicago.’67eac8040a5d95fc

He hadn’t fully decided 1883c5ff56 to take a break, 6e7e101671 but if he did f493064f3c work, Chicago, where the 4ed28d1a48 security company’s headquarters were, d3924e01ea would be best.c915d9d08161cd6b

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‘That house, Tennessee. It has to be that old house.’f85af7a070aba676

‘…’9c5013aa3ec1343f

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To Tennessee, Amber seemed 24d8ddaf1f to have deep regret 9c89a1a0db about that house being 907246c195 sold.25603c25767cd6cf

According to Amber, what Tennessee sold wasn’t just a house, but the memories that came with it.197f4defd1f49aa2

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Selling memories, 6c75ebf610 he says…Tennessee sometimes thought 7d21cea476 about that house 9e0f3e2bb2 too. Not just bdc509ccdf that house 4020af6e04 specifically, but b02ef6a651 all the d16e40f73c spaces that 30ef032f6c held memories 9c0350e7cc with Amber, 40f3dafe91 like fingerprints.158e86fc6c87c8dc

Back when 51b382e08c he lived cfdbbb8fd3 in the 100237d055 studio apartment 37c4234895 in Chicago. Amber would press 633c529e71 his face close 640d90c258 to the window 4a4e33913e to see the bb1398a183 night view. When his nose 5c6faa5741 touched the cold 4eb6bbddbd surface, his breath 228eabd55f would fog up a7f5092cc2 the glass. City lights. With both hands against ba5dc57f56 the window, Amber would 37f42f3faa stare outside for a b6f64853a6 long time. Even after he 8e5500cd33 stopped being amazed 86b56478d8 by the night e1a2a23bf9 view, Amber would 32ed917913 still press his 389d30e761 nose against the a15a7905b7 window and look b28d9fb103 outside.a83e05d3cfd06f01

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That’s what you call memories, apparently.So Tennessee 6d339b53d3 finally decided a7f7c39893 on that f197bdeccd house from e24625e529 back then. Fortunately, it was 053d39ac3d possible.f0a723bea8dc1f8c

“Amber.”252d38939ad7558b

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He called out as a test, but Amber didn’t wake up. Maybe fatigue from the past few days had accumulated. Not wanting to wake him, Tennessee pulled the wheelchair beside him. Thankfully his left hand was fine. If he couldn’t move his left hand either, wouldn’t his lifespan have been shortened just from frustration?65f1a74041197af5

“Whew…”a941571d74853ff1

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Tennessee had to break a sweat just to get into the wheelchair by himself. His legs weren’t comfortable, and it was hard having to support his entire body with just his left hand. The fortunate thing was that Amber had locked the wheelchair’s wheels. If not for that, he wouldn’t have succeeded due to the wheelchair rolling around.05cb97b931e083a9

After managing to get 7aa5304e15 into the wheelchair through a97c1b83df various struggles, Tennessee wiped a0c289b34f his forehead, which was 2ae6e39072 now drenched in sweat.f0e2f26bb35985c1

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Getting into the wheelchair a6eb8ab506 was difficult, but everything 19da139e7e else went smoothly. Seeing Tennessee 159e06c48c coming, people bed973a903 held the 1090429757 elevator door 16ff64bbfe open for a2a9f22c76 a long b9ba843b4a time waiting 8fea58ceac for him. Though he gestured ee510a908c for them to dd73f1eaa2 go ahead saying d5fac53604 it was fine, 632f8ec601 a middle-aged woman 046a50ce1f even pushed him, 7a4aac36fa perhaps feeling sorry c25b060ae3 seeing him moving e8c9e2654d with just one 78faaa11f2 hand.fdcdcda18f36a4be

“How did you get hurt?”a93afb8798d3e91a

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Tennessee didn’t answer as he found it bothersome, but the woman started making up his own story, saying ‘Poor thing, must have been in an accident.’bd3d089852f1aa4e

“My son Jeremy also had a traffic accident…”56af4e8be475a4bb

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Since it wasn’t particularly unpleasant to hear, Tennessee just nodded vaguely. He received other small helps too, and Tennessee didn’t refuse them. He thought it was okay to accept as long as it wasn’t a big favor.68e36f651b791905

And when Tennessee returned 21f05e7c7e to the hospital room, 96c9fba9f1 the door was wide b403a09365 open. Tennessee stiffened and 722a340c0a assessed the atmosphere.de1ee440a739d399

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Amber was sitting alone. He must have woken up quite a while ago as there was no trace of sleepiness. Tennessee pushed the wheelchair with difficulty using one hand, and because the sound was quiet, Amber didn’t notice him right away.309dcfd2e0ec2bc8

As he entered, 65c29788ca Tennessee saw Amber b50224c680 wearing what seemed 0a846b3799 like a stiff 7da6a3ad66 mask. It was the e3e1039308 first time he’d 1f4a3872e7 seen such an 9519d1332c expressionless face on 3ec6df0dc8 Amber. It was as f4d6c2bc1e if his expression 1ab56d0bbf had been wiped dae823a843 clean, blank like 8dee0e35d8 a white canvas. You could draw anything 902b9be714 on it. He wouldn’t have 6b6dcf9848 been surprised if 2e66c757eb anger lurked behind 55728443ec that blankness.4a1103cd060b4f68

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“What are you doing?”312f66e570e952d4

“Tennessee?”76ba82fa1a34726e

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Amber jumped up. It was a bright 1ad963f796 face contrasting with the ddb0ddcc72 earlier expressionlessness, as if fe400d3b06 it had been an e5243bb8ec illusion.f5f5895b41431106

“Where did you go?”ba3761ac2ee5fafe

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Tennessee furrowed his brows 8e800ccec7 at the expression that 62e8e97f6b changed as soon as f9c756f07d Amber discovered him.7cdd67f852c7d899

“A walk. What’s wrong?”87a6409a8e7a3414

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No, just,f63c86029389b68e

“I thought you ran away.”91668b7b2a58bb1f

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The tone was full cc7747f900 of playfulness, but there 8ec1f7d4c1 was a weight in 03cab64734 that message.3f2ffc66fb11ccc2

“Why would I run away?”615c0e572fa3f70a

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“Right, of course.”496d2aec73b038f2

Amber, who c8f6a068e2 seemed to 5d8b77be51 be thinking a802420714 deeply, agreed 7746ce8d0f with a a30b7f48bf look of 3e5a4ff4d6 understanding.136b7008a9e1b0f0

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“You have surgery this week, how could you leave?”19af044a450a5f56

“…”671d479acfc05e02

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Amber had become more cynical in the time he hadn’t seen each other.35b2e817abc94f65

And Amber marveled at how he got into the wheelchair alone. Before Tennessee could say anything, Amber quickly locked the wheelchair and bent down close. It meant for Tennessee to put his arm around Amber’s neck. The routine was that if Tennessee wrapped one arm around Amber’s neck and hung on, Amber would help lift him to sit on the wheelchair, otherwise Amber would have to completely lift him up.ff87e4dafc3dbf69

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Though it was contact he just couldn’t get used to, it was better than being carried like a princess. Hiding his uncomfortable feelings, Tennessee wrapped his arm around.f33245d5db2ca85e

“Was the walk nice?”786fc6e02273588d

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Their upper bodies were pressed close and ticklish breath touched his neck and shoulder. Amber put his arm around Tennessee’s waist. The arm crossing his back felt unfamiliar. The old Amber used to be small enough that he could have dangled from Tennessee.ee04c67a76c7c022

“Yeah.”7165bd0d4842fea2

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“Let’s go together next time.”e0ea2076b097f229

Amber suggested while helping b015af5674 Tennessee get onto the bd5b04e533 bed effortlessly.aeaa42af9c9f4e40

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“Let’s eat ice cream together.”756b3478f543c626

Tennessee nodded at Amber’s words.9b6704fdffc894d5

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“You said ice cream.”115b4aba67137cec

Doritos, Lays, Butterfinger, 059a064c2b BabyRuth, 3 Musketeers. These were all the bd873e1294 snacks Amber was holding 38b3f5aae4 in one hand.cd444686729130e5

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Considering that the place Amber visits most frequently these days is none other than the vending machine, it’s not really surprising. On his other hand were a Mountain Dew and a root beer.28082b60e1825fa7

Tennessee made a nauseated face seeing all the things tumbling out. Amber’s tendency as a faithful Mountain Dew enthusiast seemed to have now extended to root beer and Dr Pepper. Of course, Tennessee didn’t like any of the three.31dab89b1029eb04

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“Is this why you’re staying in the hospital?”f28141f550ffcdbd

Amber burst out laughing, but Tennessee’s question contained about 65% sincerity. It was certain that as Amber’s size had grown, he needed more fuel too. Amber would instantly devour all those greasy, sweet, and salty things from where he sat. He didn’t forget to suck his thumb tip and raise the corners of his mouth in satisfaction.f040dbb4fabbb4ca

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“What about school?”246919927a1bffeb

Tennessee brought up the question he’d been curious about for a week. Amber was probably attending university. But during these two weeks, Amber hadn’t left the hospital room except to get books to read or necessities like clothes. He had faithfully stayed by Tennessee’s side throughout.01848cc73a9e19f0

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“I told you, Tennessee, that I won’t tell you.”0cddb0c6966dc31d

Amber retorted that Tennessee should know how frustrating it is when your curiosity isn’t satisfied.643b4cc4b9485f33

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This was his karma, so Tennessee didn’t ask further. He had other methods anyway. If he just dropped hints to Elizabeth or David, they would readily tell him what a proud son and upright young man Amber was.a943c7e0f9b45312

“By the way, Elizabeth and David won’t tell you either.”cac0eb491cd2b680

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Tennessee raised his 6764773b29 eyebrows at the ddeaaafe7e unexpected words.25b72176de9b7f4b

“I warned them thoroughly.”766a527ebd7915a9

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“Are you being spiteful?”bd524c69064b1d35

“No.”85db389f3964e32a

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Amber shook his head a4e814f37c saying that was absurd.d99f0d4980b8a8a3

“We’ll exchange questions later.”fe0c6784bde344c8

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Amber flatly refused with a bright face. Separate from regretfully refusing Tennessee, Amber’s heart was just filled with happiness. Even if he couldn’t promise what would happen in the future, each day being with Tennessee made his heart overflow.93aced667f44aa0d

“I thought the more time passed, the less curious I’d be…”f05926e4061081bd

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“I think I’ve told you a lot.”dfc46d7a77d84e8a

“Not enough.”9b40f2d6388839c5

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Amber’s logic was that since Tennessee often kept his mouth shut, he had no choice but to use such underhanded methods.0c46945b33c040f5

“What are you so curious about?”f65a5c455efd3c4f

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Amber said there 545a2e6d01 would be no 2208b45b7d end if he 7a4124a259 started asking questions.c1acf29d83032d7d

“So, let’s ask each other one by one. Until then, you can accumulate questions too, Tennessee.”96ac2daa60eff126

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Amber’s large hand a20c53566b cautiously approached. It lightly 7c2a239024 touched the 34290d878b tip of 8e7fff0b73 Tennessee’s left 60133c6f4c hand. It felt like a b9e1f04df9 feather had landed.24201e27c0a3ccb2

The smooth 7403cdca6f touch of d0b3f0412a fingertips was 7522cbffe1 unfamiliar, but b4106ee500 it felt 31a89d0a66 too sensitive 6626637e8d to pull 92ff47b4af away. As Tennessee moved his 305eb4d617 fingers, he eventually let 3c7a0030eb go when someone approached f0819f0cdf them.b74d5d7a2b10e150

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A man in scrubs ad75d603ad and Crocs appeared, and 0a19cdea53 Tennessee instinctively tensed but eac8e9f16a soon sighed. He recognized the f68c69b628 man by his aa74279897 voice and hand 3faf178313 gestures. It was the d7626a9523 nurse who came edd2572b07 by occasionally.e500f6d2b90790bb

“Good morning, Ryker.”9aae0c72f7249386

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“Good morning.”2188b32c700e5d7d

Amber naturally 89fda7d35f stepped aside, 5a4f7a35c0 saying he’d 66e1274be3 clean up 6cc6dff8f8 the snack 19425f829c trash. The nurse checked the 5a45ccfb57 IV in Tennessee’s arm 42972d93e5 and asked a few 5a2ba9e86e questions.cd52ddc6df5b8852

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Tennessee couldn’t answer the questions right away as he was watching Amber’s back disappearing around the corner. The nurse laughed when Tennessee couldn’t concentrate at all. He smiled, knowing all too well.3318538acb0f92ae

“Your boyfriend is as handsome as ever.”4937f9364a7920e6

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Tennessee’s mind lit up as he was about to answer.0fc90470744ac26b

…Boyfriend?7ea3212486f8243c

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“All done.”bc944ebf2bf8e40b

Before Tennessee could grab him and explain, the nurse set down the medicine and paper cup. Then he disappeared with a look that seemed to say ‘what a lovely couple.’ Like passing a baton, Amber appeared from around the corner of the hallway.ba6cbea613b8c75d

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“Amber, how did you introduce yourself to that person?”5454b8297e080637

Tennessee’s interrogation began.6928f4a21a9102c1

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“Me? As Ryker.”e0a6ff4c97c6f448

He was 1589dbf7ed usually quick-witted, 68f32ca323 and Ryker 5a8b01da9f was also 1b91ccec73 good at bdfd83f52b pretending to 5bcb10d36d be oblivious.c602466e51de9915

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“He thinks you’re my boyfriend.”5f8513d7e3aa421b

“Ah.”650c6dad9b5d43b0

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Amber swallowed the words that probably most of the hospital thought the same. Amber avoided eye contact. Though Amber claimed he was innocent and upright, he couldn’t escape the allegations.a85ead612034f4ac

“How did you introduce yourself?”bca0b7c382350615

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“That word…. starting with P.”1f28de3a415a4dc3

“Patr-”7329251b8992d830

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“Partner.”aaf6bfefebc43fac

“…Plus one, right.“¹08b081dcb3950bd5

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A scoff escaped Tennessee’s lips involuntarily. Not even as a business partner, but introducing himself as a partner while staying at the hospital constantly taking care of him was akin to coming out.dcd5e20fff7a838d

“I didn’t mean it that way, but that’s how he seems to have taken it.”aa22b9839a1d0936

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Amber added regretfully.05ea571468ba2dde

He insisted he da2fa40a1f truly meant partner, e03fa64d7c but people took c6e3a4fb49 it the wrong 0007f8810c way.7f6e879feef982d7

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“Shut up.”bac5d5894be6d6d6

“It really wasn’t my fault.”68143eb095fcf153

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It didn’t work on Tennessee. He couldn’t shake the thought that Amber was gradually becoming more audacious.93775f7c446ae144

“I’m sorry.”5ef2f0c70586a4f1

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Just as an annoyed f744729085 Tennessee was about to 9558e28925 speak, Amber quickly apologized.f90a3b69f7ff993c

“A few days ago, he asked what our relationship was since we don’t look like relatives. In that situation, I couldn’t tell him everything about our past, and I couldn’t find another word to replace it. And well…”f741df55b4501d10

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Amber smiled bitterly. The corners of abff3d2285 his mouth that e55ccef06f had tried to 02a27f2117 rise crumbled slightly.77dfbd9902ad2279

“I couldn’t say we’re nothing, because that’s not true. Are we really nothing?”4d094432ca54842c

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When asked like that, eeacbec044 Tennessee had nothing to 5d0c27acbd say again.c9015aa1a44bc700

“I’m sorry.”035db6f2331676aa

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Amber apologized again. Words of reproach rose 8c5ac0743f to his throat but 72f3a300c8 barely clung to Tennessee’s a505ca6a9f tongue. After much fa52e70fcd struggle, they 287c684ffe finally went 62dabf4d14 back in. What could he eddfd680f9 do when Amber df56a0a597 was sorry?b05d3f557bf68d0a

“Next time we meet, I’ll explain it.”e3a0999f10d15f3f

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“What are you going to say?”2ce5a8f1782e6316

Amber went ‘hmm’ and e1c3ff3dcf then laughed softly.072a3d2c4b6d273a

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“I’m not sure, I’ll think about it.”f9c7df84949481cc

Tennessee, who had 1da0392387 been rubbing his 6ae059b55b temple, ended up e4df776bab shaking his head.387e369b7890cbe1

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“Forget it, it doesn’t matter anyway.”9c34edb64561761e

They were 01a6dc670b people he 16ed2df1df would soon 09f1f057b9 forget and b6e91226d4 never see 7f13faa04d again, and 25e191f81f it would 3917143b29 be ridiculous 5965da11e0 to go c4ee1d283f around explaining c94460d3d0 to each 3734ecf89b of them.72f1c76e47780393

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“You’re not angry, right?”ee07c2ec2e7595d3

“No.”e311737224d8bb2d

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Tennessee couldn’t shake the feeling that he was somehow being led along by Amber.d85f0dd88fb341e3

Tennessee, who had become serious, naturally found himself contemplating Amber’s impudence. He had an intuition that Amber was becoming more and more cunning as the years went by.b629104219a132e9

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“Tennessee.”3004b415f555d805

Something approached Tennessee’s 492d2dfaf3 lips, lost in 142ef1ebf0 deep thought. It was a e1bd07065a pill.33292e0b597dd87f

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The morphine 3704ea0331 Tennessee refused b3072f7a52 was highly 72f001d908 addictive and 82e085c83a had side 13673b7e9b effects, but 78d424fee7 it was 19963ddfd0 a very e81027eeab effective and 07869e8f62 powerful painkiller. Along with 380aa4f449 the surgery 0d85505c4d site, Tennessee 875cd290de was in e2aed727c7 severe pain 26fe121e61 from his d50a78ee97 injuries, so 70dae3dc77 he was 6a2170f688 regularly taking 1417c65888 alternative painkillers.0dfa15370a27b2a4

He reached out 13008f81e1 with his good 3f8685173c left hand, but 027deeb5c3 Amber shook his 0fb2221511 head. As he was about ff67ef2756 to insist, a round, 977b24ad26 smooth pill touched his a29ca7875f lips. The pill carefully slipped b7bd8765a3 through his barely parted 11e45cd892 lips.3ac1f134d6ae2b43

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“Open wider.”0b7e9bcd422c01bf

Now, Tennessee’s lips were c239e6bb67 only slightly parted, enough 845e9060f9 for a breath to e6c0b8b4a8 escape. When Tennessee reacted e624f43874 indifferently, Amber’s thumb d6819d69a7 touched his lower 870ea8ce02 lip. The warm fingertip pressed 281ad79d5c against the swollen red 7d14d5fcb1 lower lip. Reluctantly, Tennessee relaxed 794278f22f his lips, and 82a5558e11 Amber smiled contentedly.cdfe65c991ed84fe

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He thought Amber would make him bite down on his finger, but instead, Amber’s finger passed the lower lip and slipped slightly into his moist mouth. It was a light entry, just enough for Amber’s fingertip to touch his teeth. If Amber’s thumb went in just a bit more, it would touch the tender flesh inside his mouth.87d5b7c668d538b6

While holding Tennessee’s mouth open like that, Amber pushed the pills in one by one. After putting all the pills in his mouth, he brought a cup of water too. As Tennessee drank, his eyes looked up. Whenever Tennessee looked at him, their eyes always met. Amber’s gaze was always on Tennessee.4cb55e4c17e15d2b

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“Good boy.”ddfc800ee6b920bf

Tennessee’s brow furrowed slightly at those words, which Amber noticed with uncanny perception.6ab0b9f996af5e86

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“That’s me. I’m such a good boy, taking care of you like this.”b7ad59b2a55c52c8

Good boy, Amber.b1bc33e88237f0bf

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While praising himself loudly enough to be heard, Amber rested his forehead on Tennessee’s shoulder. Knowing Tennessee’s physical condition, it was a light touch like flower petals landing.0570a8d7a36bb2fa

Tennessee stroked Amber’s black hair. Not expecting it, Amber’s shoulders stiffened, but Tennessee nodded without noticing.f7cccb7cdbde5709

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Why hadn’t he stroked his hair more like this before? Amber’s hair was so soft it made him regret it, and it pleasantly disheveled under his palm.faad2dec5f80cc59

“Yeah. You’re a good boy, Amber.”2975518815d2c8b1

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His masculine strong a8efa2734e and dark eyebrows 620e59d3bf rise. Every time Amber 653c1184c1 blinked, his shadowed e640023487 eyelashes seemed to 419240601c flutter like butterfly a441406ef7 wings. When this handsome dc2a30e189 man who would e26a7476f6 draw attention anywhere 352e6c2dec smiled softly, his a56d177e4b beauty shone even b5c18840f6 more.2d85bbf5fbbb5b1f

“Thank you.”4a2961dd2753ea1e

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7dce912bb48f1599