LM Chapter 10

The next day, while suffering from a hangover after waking up, I found packaged hangover soup on the kitchen sink. Only then did I remember that Cheolsoo hyung had taken me home. But I wasn’t happy at all despite the thoughtfully prepared hangover soup. Rather, I felt bitter. Not even a note telling me to eat well? Was he telling me to eat and get lost?d252cc30a79ba756

People are truly 7fc9e38184 fickle. I had wanted 3b7b346b62 to see him 10609f6e1e so badly, but 313c1d6bd8 now that I 1bc44da29a did, I was ec9f576cfa upset that there 9c6647cd72 was no note. Feeling pathetic about myself, 9ed3cb6688 I decided to clear becfc30e42 my head by taking f50ac07001 a shower. Afterward, I absentmindedly turned 42bd95e711 on my phone and fa27a74a28 saw a message from d03ca26aca an unknown number.9caf84debe4f5ca2

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‘Eat the hangover soup. Make sure f56ef340f1 you do.’34266d6451c9543f

After blankly staring at 6b416e4e35 the number, I covered 5160b6d35c my face with my bb0bf9e8f8 hands.9a42702e133dc373

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“Ah, shit.”c41f3575349ac5c4

My damn heart was 303fbbba80 fluttering again.3bdfb3f640901ca6

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---

‘Excuse me, f6aba92a14 is this f46b278708 Mr. Im Minha?’5eccc8bbd2b02664

A text came from an unknown number. Normally, even if it matched my name, I would have deleted it thinking it was spam. But since I kept having unexpected encounters with people since yesterday, I couldn’t simply ignore it. So I replied.747447409a603bd2

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‘Who is this?’01324adc83bcf290

Maybe I 3620ba186b had a 7abb87dd51 really serious 55932e406d expression, as 99c58c5ba3 an unnecessary d61a03de18 question came 05218f97ee from beside b9852d9141 me.261c763cb95c636e

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“What’s wrong?”3b58bfc497f0707b

It was Bae Taehoon be2de4f45b who had followed me 54a18514a3 all the way to 9be4aa6733 the convenience store where b50e900b06 I used to work. I looked at him 6fda478aba with frustrated eyes.38f2ef425f631ec8

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“Don’t you have 9969df4f76 anything to do?”4615984f50bd61a3

“I’m hanging 050f4bcd49 out with a94676aa11 you, what 865f4736cb else would 711eb61a17 I do?”c5dce0a11549a9ef

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“…If you’re going to tag along, at least pay for your own fare.”a8c679fd2d57fc0b

That’s right. This chaebol heir hadn’t linked a transportation card to his credit card, so I had to scan for both of us. My resentment must have irked him because he fired back defensively.2ac825f2f4058346

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“That’s why I said we should take my car.”3847fb4ea367eb68

“I don’t ride in other people’s cars.”329bb3bcc4ebb02c

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“Right, good thinking. You could get kidnapped all of the sudden these days.”5c7e8134d2aa1226

While I was 46a5805b54 dumbfounded by the 5174ac8fa6 unexpected answer, thinking‘what?‘, Bae Taehoon added with a sigh.c362c6792829038a

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“But right now, I’m protecting you.”348bbd92b202b4dd

From what? From an 745b833d39 invisible enemy? I held back what I wanted to say. I had to. Bae Taehoon’s phone started ringing like crazy again.66f110ec7b2e74c9

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“Please just answer it.”f4d390447246bc09

I asked fbb84526ac him and 2b1d50950b entered the 5f6d131f26 convenience store 2174462ca0 alone. Surprisingly, after 8 years, 498a51b3b6 the convenience store was 52e6d05c1c still operating in the da90071723 same place.4570462b8fc4c3b9

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Ding.f1a71d19485f41de

The bell sound on the door was still the same. The part-timer was a woman in her mid-20s who greeted us with “Welcome!” I headed straight to the counter to tell her my purpose. I was going to say that I used to work here as a part-timer, and ask if the manager was still the same person. But I didn’t need to ask. The nametag on her chest was clearly visible.d56556c686062e4d

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‘Lee Youngsoo’93660ab0140fc0e1

It was clear that b3ef724c0e manager was still running b2ad671675 this place. I belatedly ab0d5ab882 introduced myself 356bce910c and asked.c1ec63e19c458cc5

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“Don’t you have female ae33607dbf name tags too? Like Kim Younghee?”a3300986deb7835f

“Oh, we do. But they’re so 3f3353b840 outdated.”9997aca3c8506faf

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And Lee Youngsoo is f4291b0282 fine?She chuckled softly as f3a5f58def she noticed my skeptical 8b01d5dde8 gaze.852e259e3e7184fd

“What can I do when there are only two choices?”4e0dd19088b0d056

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“Huh? There should be one more. Park Ryeok.”71b9313e8706b232

“What? Park Ryeok? No, we don’t have that. It’s either Lee Youngsoo or Kim Younghee. Oh, right, I heard that we used to have a Kim Cheolsoo too.”d89aa601969e2523

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What, they got rid eff18bf293 of Kim Cheolsoo too?I was more c0c4a9b65d disappointed about Kim d8070b575c Cheolsoo disappearing than 4c51c9673f Park Ryeok.1e1c5b9805bd888f

“By the way, the manager is on a family trip. He’ll be back in a few days.”20f8a9d7036fb08e

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“Then please just tell him Park Ryeok, the part-timer, stopped by to say hello.”322a9ee961cba865

While passing on e02a1e7f5e the message, I c00ee694ee asked slightly out 2cbe9dba0d of concern.8b4cb71901bd24b5

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“How’s business going?”6eee0f9fd33e7c51

“Not great. A new 8915ea5d42 convenience store b93dc1bc6d opened nearby, e6a5435bae so sales 86b654ac64 have dropped 58905406b3 a bit.”c126af3986c5361d

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Ah, how bad.Unlike my worry, 6803b061a3 the part-timer added 36bda35323 cheerfully.846f0f6ca0f60fb5

“But the manager is the building owner, so whatever.”0558418932cabde5

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“The dried fish owner¹?”b683e2c2e97c1934

“No, building owner. His investment was super successful so he bought this building. An investment with someone he knew worked out well. He brags so much about how it’s all because he’s good at judging people.”3a3474f3904f2ee0

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Was the manager actually good at judging people? Hard to believe, but I was glad things were going well for him. Not wanting to leave empty-handed, I paid for two drinks and was leaving the convenience store when I heard Bae Taehoon’s angry voice.cc85d7c1d63893f9

“You said it just in case? Are you crazy? Why the hell would you tell Mother something you’re not even sure about? What if you dragged Im Minha into this, fuck.”3885296bad80e262

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He noticed me 7633d89e60 and shut his ca7473bcda mouth while cursing. At this point, 0bca618b61 I had to 2512ba17ac look at him 551cf3f53a with suspicious eyes. Why did he say 4ea8ab635e my name? I asked him right 2924505e69 after he hung up 84b11ceca6 the phone.fc5d4f6c3bf9cbb8

“What’s going on?”37022edf301e2208

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“It’s nothing.”24b82a941de9a495

“I heard my name, so I need to know even if it’s nothing.”938df1b7ae9d8216

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When I firmly demanded, 3d060cdab1 he sighed.f96e1fb20a1462e4

“Because you showed up at the funeral yesterday, there’s some misunderstanding about you.”ec0ffac0aeb3c823

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He turned his gaze away and couldn’t meet my eyes as he said the last words.ae8c53e7289398b2

“Who has what misunderstanding?”6bcf6e461b3b7eac

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“Oh Saebyeok. After remembering that you knew that person in college… Anyway, don’t worry about it.”7f8c452ba872bf95

“Who do you mean with that person?”72ecfce7b8a811b7

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“Someone who’s going to fuck up Mirae.”03cf8b05b90841ec

Though it was a surprising answer, it wasn’t enough for me. But that was all the explanation Bae Taehoon gave.5f6a3a1cdb615c29

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“Anything else?”c091249dcd8c0b38

“You’ll know everything when it all ends tomorrow.”747278209d0201db

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Bae Taehoon let cc5c0c3fd8 out a hollow 5b76a75e53 laugh while saying b96cec1453 those words. Then suddenly, 3c405de3e4 with a a5ea660792 serious expression, 96c29a9802 he warned,74f1ac4a565df53d

“If you get any db084b961e strange messages, ignore them. Don’t respond. Got it?”cdcfd1f1073ae25c

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I already 2607475fc6 received a 18feb165fc strange message, ed039d7412 though? I checked my 6ee25b9886 phone, remembering the 28d6c3f807 text from earlier. There was a response dbfc5cdaad to my question from 03076ca016 an unfamiliar number.5f098fc279928163

‘I’m contacting you regarding CEO Shim Jaeheon.’50f5530a94b0e912

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Only one ec7a5f73bb thought came 3416f1c9d8 to my febe3a17b2 mind –Who is that?When I frowned, Bae cc53d047d9 Taehoon quickly noticed.d81dbda40acaf834

“Did you already get a contact from Mirae?”9b6f35c3478e2e7d

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“I don’t know. They didn’t introduce themselves and just suddenly mentioned a name.”a67bef9b4a687afa

I spoke while b98919d7a9 looking at my 3e0b48be56 phone screen.c0c08780598ba645

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“Who is Shim Jaeheon?”796dccb7cdce2c4d

When I didn’t hear an answer, I slowly raised my head. Bae Taehoon’s expression was peculiar. With eyes full of puzzlement, he frowned.234d10cf73160e2d

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“…You don’t know Shim Jaeheon?”b1408aa4f71fa739

“I don’t, that’s 6a9387dd55 why I’m asking.”beceffdbe3cd7987

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He ran cb5f120487 his hand 01daeb2b45 through his 5743d9efd4 hair, seemingly 26109caac5 confused.a1da8373f7f6a967

“You really have no idea?”5ea3b1d81c59885c

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“I had a guess until this morning. Professor Hong’s lawyer said the same thing as you. She told me to be careful. The reason was related to someone else who, like me, was receiving belongings from Professor Hong.”e0836e3cfeaae646

“Belongings? You’re receiving something from Professor Hong? Why?”bd79f01957f21768

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If I had 4a8a7f97d2 known, I wouldn’t 69060035d3 have been so 2f1e107ef3 frustrated since yesterday.424d8b573c299117

I responded lightly, as 28cb5af8ed if joking.9a1aa6e27ddb5de1

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“Maybe she just wanted to leave me some wealth.”2ed858f7eef972f6

“Definitely not.”953592e19b34f188

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“…Not?”81ed96b7eb7da0ce

“Yeah,” Bae Taehoon nodded firmly and shared some information. “Professor Hong decided to donate all her wealth. Even our alma mater was transferred to the foundation, causing a huge uproar in her family. She transferred everything to the donation foundation except for the clothes she was wearing when she passed away.”a2ca9c67235a7d4b

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…Ah, so I won’t be receiving gold bars then. It wasn’t that she wanted to pass down a chest of gold to me, the grandson of her first love. I finally discarded the exciting hypothesis I’d been harboring for half a day.30e6a1c0d1528cef

“But isn’t the university owned by Professor Hong’s family? Can she decide that alone?”5cf480ca08ce7f82

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“Yes. Professor Hong had bought up all the foundation shares over time. That’s why they couldn’t legally stop it and are just barking about it. They probably all thought it would become theirs again after Professor Hong died since they’re family.”48d899d58ccf4231

And according to his brief explanation, Professor Hong’s wealth was quite big.1f83e33cc0729540

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“She established a new scholarship at the university, and they say she left behind a huge number of unreleased works to ensure there wouldn’t be a shortage of funds. She said to release them after she passed away  because the prices would skyrocket after her death.”8c849be120f6fd35

Among all the stories I heard from Bae Taehoon today, Professor Hong’s story was the most surprising. To me, she was just a genius artist but also a professor who gave stingier grades than anyone else, someone I never wanted to meet again. I did get an A once, though.4ab7db22e79f9364

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“I had no idea she was that kind of person.”964ec9bcfb01f9c2

“Nobody knew. But everyone was surprised yet seemed to accept it. She was a female dominant Alpha after all.”c05f1bd59568fae4

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Ah, right, a female dominant Alpha. They’re considered the most perfect form of humankind. Perhaps that’s why some of them occasionally appeared to be transcendent beings who had achieved enlightenment.11b8951d70eab475

“But there are also those who are greedier and more cruel than anyone else.”ce7275b849dc268a

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I had a sense of déjà vu. Right, I’d heard something similar from Euiyun before. So even without Bae Taehoon saying the name, I could guess. There was only one person who fit the current situation.f831a90794f7b157

“I didn’t know you had any connection with Professor Hong.”bd358efef0965d38

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“I didn’t.”24460acd401e8af4

Then why?He asked with a81e96cc69 his whole face.72d2cea514b00c5f

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“I don’t know either. That’s why I naturally thought I was in danger because of Professor Hong. But it seems unrelated to the danger you’re talking about.”22888444601de093

“Well, maybe not. President Shim Jaeheon also came to Korea to attend Professor Hong’s funeral. That’s part of why Mirae is in even more chaos…”781ee8e60fb5101a

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He muttered as if 2647ca0a01 talking to himself, then 94d5af46cc asked me again.d441b182f51af5b7

“You really don’t know him?”045267fc32ca17d5

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“I told you I don’t.”26e42832261e01e9

“What’s going on? It’s not like you lost your memories.”71879f38c56decf1

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I heard his muttering clearly but didn’t respond. Instead, I asked again.7eaafd150ac7df3b

“Who is Shim Jaeheon?”bc8d6aebbf53df07

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“My brother.”ce514075fed0d1fc

Ah, one of the many children abandoned by Mirae’s chairwoman? What does that person have to do with me?077349d0be008c9c

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“Whatever misunderstanding Saebyeok has, I’ve never met Shim Jaeheonas far as I’m aware.”2939d26958a87719

“It’s not a misunderstanding. You did meet him.”86077bc7ffbd976e

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“Where?”1cf45e0be31bf139

Instead of answering, he 45e425bfb9 looked around and pointed 1af5c3d835 to a café.b7b293d42aca2a8a

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“Let’s go f4e7db5914 inside first, cc142aa550 and I’ll a96cd8fc27 explain everything. But before that, bb932c18fd I need to 698f3a80ea make one call.”7613934812dd53ad

He pressured me with his gaze, as if he wouldn’t move until I did first. Well, he said he’d explain. After I went into the café and found a seat first, I could see Bae Taehoon making a call through the front window.f16183f4db5d6bb4

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He was 0d53a0e307 the type 2c211dce02 of dominant fa027d5add Alpha who 48049472f1 grew up 2a12c576a4 in a 788aeb769b good family e3b4e60fe8 and lacked 4d71fb5fcb humility. But looking at him e456d424d7 making the call now, 83bab96ae7 he seemed as desperate 861ac5c681 as someone trying to c8e6089009 borrow money.I heard Mirae was 0cf25e2710 in trouble, is he c79e4b4bc2 really trying to borrow 12ce224cca money?Just as I was f3c7dfeab9 thinking jokingly, the name 6b6a1e357c ‘Mirae’ reached my left 062cf95c26 ear.a8920fa9d852b5aa

“What happens if Mirae collapses?”b6dfef7cff94895c

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It was the dae8cb4198 voice of a e2167448e6 customer near my 2a98d5a63a seat. They were discussing that 08d6c22193 while looking at an 64dda2585a article on their phone.1d4cdbef109abe6b

“Surely it won’t, right?”3c9bf06c71c039d2

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“This isn’t a ‘surely.’ I hear the money Mirae’s chairwoman lost just on this bet is enough to ruin the company already. And the debt they took on by forcefully pulling in money is enormous. But the problem is that the bet isn’t over yet. If they run out of money, it’s over, completely.”4c6caae1c3095be1

“Didn’t an article come out earlier saying Mirae’s chairwoman got more money?”fd682499e2da86d1

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“Ha, what money? That’s just a gambler bluffing. I heard the bank consortium that lent money to Mirae told them to surrender now before they lose even more, you know? They’re not crazy enough to pour money into a bottomless pit. And now, any ordinary amount of money won’t be enough to stop it. This is a chicken game that will only end when someone dies.”f2b1bcc83b86afb1

The person explaining shook their head. The term ‘chicken game’ brought up a vague memory. Sure enough, another customer brought up an incident I knew about.b359c347de9a435f

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“Mirae made big money betting on the mineral A’s decline before, right? When was it? 8 years ago?”4af0b795762dbfe6

Ah, right. I’d seen such news before. It was during a dinner with the staff of the convenience store. Strangely, as soon as I remembered, the scene came back as clearly as if it were yesterday. The restaurant filled with the smell of meat, the feast laid out on the table, and people eating and drinking diligently.f72fe4c4942093ea

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Amidst that, only one person was staring at the news on TV like it was a still image. At the time, the TV showed a short interview with Mirae’s chairwoman. Cheolsoo hyung was glaring at her.533e7c230879e429

“Right, 8 years ago. That’s when a Korean company was completely destroyed because of Mirae. That’s why many people say Mirae’s current situation is karma.”ae7459ed6c46593d

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As I listened to the voice of the person who first spoke, I looked up at the person standing before me. Bae Taehoon who had just entered seemed to have heard that too, but didn’t show any particular displeasure. He merely gestured for me to take a seat farther from the other customers.926d7458a1e4dbbb

“Let’s move so we can talk more quietly.”b634aaa94f11553d

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I followed him silently, but I heard Bae Taehoon’s muttering.b4574cce0691b41e

“If you think about it, it is karma.”86b042291348451d

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I stopped with my butt suspended in the air as I was about to sit down. Was he trying to attribute his family’s collapse to supernatural reasons? Even if those customers’ words were somewhat exaggerated, , the grim future they described for Mirae felt undeniable, leaving me at a loss for a proper response.70f0f753cd3c375a

“Uhm, is it?”491234db72d9fff4

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“But it’s not karma from what happened 8 years ago like those people say. It’s my mother’s karma for treating humans like vending machines.”46d4d8aff11c8405

Bae Taehoon 175adc0541 smiled, but a3abffceda his eyes f1c38bf2a0 were full ed1fa95a39 of bitterness.25e52329f229b38b

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“The person crushing Mirae right now with this chicken game is my brother.”26c08764e1185340

“Ah…”f5857a292588122e

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“He probably knew. He knew that once Mother tasted victory, she’d never let go. You know what? People who have won a chicken game once lose their fear. Even if people around them say how dangerous and irrational their current actions are, they remain firmly convinced they’ll win. It really seems like they’re possessed by a ghost.”a41c14c1f7a0d7a2

So Mirae is 5b067d7d85 really going to 057fde984f collapse? All because of gambles 2a0721bafe disguised as investments?I quickly swallowed my 26fad2dfe5 curiosity.80ab76b44aaa5411

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“What, is c63fe3efb5 there really 834b200333 no way 4a3aa46b39 to stop e2eda2d41e it?”63bf26e8fe377a6d

“Who knows. If they had stopped even a few days ago, they might have just lost everything and ended up with nothing, but now there’s an enormous debt waiting. And from what I know, it’s only getting bigger. Margin calls are probably being done non-stop at this point. The only way left is for the other side to stop…”bcba31180d84c6a2

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Bae Taehoon smiled 2b00d9fdca bitterly and shook 3db33b709d his head.6e6387e49a2e7c52

“The Shim Jaeheon I know absolutely won’t.”a1ba16d532ba9f7d

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This time I couldn’t just brush off that name lightly. To be honest, it felt uncomfortable. Not only was I suddenly hearing about Mirae family’s secrets, but I was also learning about the internal struggles of a collapsing empire.279e3c5f30fce43a

“But the idiots on this sinking ship don’t seem to realize it at all. They think if they stop Shim Jaeheon now, they can float back up to the surface. They probably contacted you like clutching at straws. They’re reaching out to everyone who knows Shim Jaeheon.”6fa5bfe398e416f1

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“I don’t know him.”d3dbda5cb9b3a9cc

“…”4bdc056152331266

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“I know one person with the surname Shim. Has that person ever used another alias?”32165ddf77b302b9

I looked 4946bc6212 straight at 35299a7a6d Bae Taehoon de3b810c74 and mentioned 947ed8c003 one name.86de4b1c84ef53c6

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“Like Kim Cheolsoo?”89d5aa04528fa7b7

***d19678d95e2d3d92

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People usually say time 3a452a6fcf heals all wounds. Big scars, 0a018eec99 horrible memories, 403bf60fe7 or even ca0569383a unresolved emotions. They say everything fades b3f89850f8 and gets better with 46c478896b time. They’re not wrong. I remember being in c15a99b3b5 pain for a while da9744c495 after my parents passed b034015d7d away when I was 9ee0cc07b0 young.5f96f890fd4fd9c8

Right after the accident, even the comforting words I was told at school were painful to hear. But after about a year, I became somewhat indifferent to my parents’ death. I could say without difficulty at school when new friends asked about my parents, ‘They passed away.’ But in an unexpected place, a stranger’s casual words left me breathless.8f92afb2bcb71345

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‘Your parents would be happy.’4d918a08b9e57e47

I think 2f073120ef it was 78b33b5a64 at some 175d3d5b03 store. I was looking at babf706c48 something, asked the owner ee87fa9b89 about it and bought 93b71824ed it, and they probably 012cefacb6 assumed I was going 602a9e7e2f to give it to 9d08926b2f my parents. It was really just 1a84936084 an ordinary, common compliment. But the wound inside f028597982 me started bleeding again.7aef6dcba2bf3741

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I felt 8b566edac4 that sensation d403c295ed a few 32a89f36c6 times after 017ec067fa that. Just when 1a292d9763 I thought 3b9a11dc3f I was d627879311 completely healed c9ec5314a6 and let 18185d3b80 my guard 44ddf42b7b down, old c24d450325 wounds would f2b3700007 surface, and b01f147de9 the pain aad188b9b5 would hit 616971e213 like reality. Moments where past 3ced30d2b8 emotions dominate me d8e0eaf3bd come without warning. Maybe because 2cce6e5edb of this 2593fd9a2c experience my 9d08fc05d4 unconscious tried 8d73b38737 to ignore 2078d4a482 such situations, fc90bde262 like closing 73d5b26dbe a door, f3ff17a4f7 seeing them 6b2882cd9e coming.145f1244e6256ee5

It probably started in the morning, when I received the lawyer’s call. When they mentioned someone who was related to me, I forcibly suppressed whoever came to mind. But now the situation had become impossible to ignore anymore. Kim Cheolsoo. When I mentioned the name, I could see Bae Taehoon slowly nodding.5b0bfd443449bec7

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“I think my brother used that name when he worked at the convenience store.”52a253bcd733906e

Right… I see.e1c02f57138fa20e

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I gulped a0d4d8c637 down the 246cb63234 now cold 70cc33faf7 coffee like f61fe03f61 water. While I drank 5401f6e49e half the cup 57cb8f938f in one go, f501428a22 Bae Taehoon watched a22ff4fb7c me carefully. I should have 949375b0d2 acted nonchalant or abf67b1698 made some nonsense feb04a2ddf excuse, but my 666a1d912d mouth wouldn’t open. Embarrassingly, Bae Taehoon cdd6ce0114 waited for me b93e04eaef for quite a dfd25f71ef while.7794efda989e17d2

“You didn’t know my brother’s real name?”5e5c8d4502320426

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“No. To your brother, I was just a coworker, nothing more.”77ddcdd548337c08

“That can’t be true.”9316d06a42871715

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He denied it immediately. Then he pointed outside.cc287f3345862ead

“Before coming here, I called Jaeheon hyung. As soon as I mentioned your name, he said he’d send people to help. People who will keep you safe will be here soon.”c3de42e383d3c752

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“He would have sent people even if you had mentioned Park Daseul’s name.”9ed4c916337dc001

“Who’s Park Daseul?”005794a0dc7b2d85

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“The manager. And I don’t need people to protect me. You did something completely unnecessary.”4d3164bad3a8dbf3

At my reproach, he e3e910653d let out what must a5716827e1 have been his umpteenth 5850c9adf8 sigh of the day.6963ea497ec28ab5

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“I get that your e1ca10d636 pride is hurt, but c677ea2dd8 you’re really in danger. I told you, Mirae e1b06487a9 is desperate and will c90a977e4b do anything, even grasp 6a634715b7 at straws.”1b839e09126325fc

“This isn’t about pride.”67bbfaa1e937c8d7

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I cut off his words and took out my phone to dial the lawyer’s number I had called this morning. After several rings, I heard her voice.285ea9d1c8d339e0

[Mr. Im Minha?]

“Is the reason I’m 1515302da7 in danger related to 3044c775e2 the Mirae Group?”026c182c2689749e

[…Did they contact you?]

“Is it?”96c26205e769a3ca

After a brief pause, 5869c44403 I heard a ‘Yes’ b01e26200d in response. While I 96f3b2db61 was at 56a90401a7 it, I 4a3d64d07f confirmed one c99634b7df more thing.dcc2ef41575c4a6f

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“And the other person receiving Professor Hong’s belongings besides me is someone named Shim Jaeheon, right?”2667e52e1f59794e

[Yes.]

“I see.”0c329e0d4d056147

[Mr. Im Minha, where are you right now?]

I told her the 44e190365d location and added,734b0cf2fb6ddf65

“Please send someone to protect me.”060fd6aaf38caec5

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After hearing that she would send someone right away, I hung up. Bae Taehoon’s face showed he wanted an explanation about who I had just talked to and what about, but I didn’t feel like explaining.7384f48e2cd6bae1

“Contact your brother again. Tell him there’s no need to send anyone.”a42be1fa6ddabfee

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“I don’t know who’s helping you, but our side is more reliable.”4255f8a3bf7adcfc

“Want me to tell you what’s really reliable? You, Saebyeok, and Mirae are all mistaken. That person and I haven’t had any contact for 8 years, so I’m not worth negotiating over. You don’t need to keep me around like a bulletproof vest either.”8c9952a199e6f12e

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He frowned at my fe65814142 words.59eb39bb23241322

“Im Minha.”9e3e0e7ea55ba494

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He struggled to say 625d59ae13 my name. Then, swallowing a 92f4690b2a sigh, he lowered c076d7a59f his voice.5a69e9f0a9070adb

“I’m not just protecting you to look good to Jaeheon hyung. Though I can’t say that’s not part of it, the biggest reason is that I feel sorry.”6bd23c31f32764e5

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“Sorry for what?”80a61e412c80e7c6

He lowered his gaze. Just when I was thinking I should stop him because it seemed like something I didn’t want to hear, he spoke.2118d9a9e4cfc659

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“About that incident that made you quit school. Just mentioning it must be terrible for you… but what Alpha Six did to you… I’m partly responsible for it.”20d7e32a504f007a

I looked b8ed7c6a18 at him 5efe9e9607 quietly, then f85d09a056 lifted the 9d2ea8a2cb remaining coffee e4f51a627f cup to 68f51a711b my lips 0913bd480f and replied.994a17a76b44d4b4

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“I know.”f290e9f86c9536bf

I saw his surprised face, but I didn’t bother to tell him the truth. That the incident wasn’t a big deal to me. That I had to quit school for a different reason.8ddc8563c52367af

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---

I ended up spending the break at home for the first time in a while. Even though it hadn’t been a year since I started living alone, the house I’d lived in all my life felt unfamiliar. But I soon got used to it again. Grandfather was the same as ever. He was taking care of my grandmother, using the caregiver license he had earned diligently, almost living at the hospital to take care of her with all his heart.77d620385ae528b8

So even though I was home, I was mostly alone. At least I found a short-term part-time job here, so I didn’t have to just space out at home. That would have been truly pathetic. I would have spent all my time just holding my phone waiting, focused entirely on the few text messages exchanged each day.efd16744e96b73d1

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Yes, after coming back home, I started texting with Cheolsoo hyung. We didn’t talk about much. Just what we did today, what we ate, that was all. Even then, it was mostly me reaching out first to tell him stuff, and Cheolsoo hyung would just give short answers.09d5b7e7fd7fbf32

‘My grandpa made rolled eggs for breakfast before he left. He puts flying fish roe in his rolled eggs and it pops in your mouth. It was delicious. A bit salty though.’7ed54326dfae6285

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‘Drink water.’e0d8b61f66c6c58b

‘Wow, you sound just like my grandpa! He was like, eat more rice. He forcibly gave me more rice and I thought I was going to die from eating so much in the morning.’372f222475140f6e

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His next reply came 260eaba3b2 after a long while.aae6e3f55030a1af

‘You’re alive.’93ad8c7370847b36

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Yes, of course I’m alive. While I found his boring replies ridiculous, they also made me laugh. His short answers were sometimes the funniest thing in the world, and sometimes the most touching. I know I’m being silly.fea674a38baed362

Looking at just the 464eff5253 content, you might think ca263ed1aa he found me annoying. Honestly, it was quite ae51f58c51 a blow to my ab10d2ec43 pride. But still, I 29b3a83f87 kept texting him 1a8354c6cb every day, morning 954a4c4d3d and night, reporting 8816a63283 to him like 5f6a98b6f5 clockwork, without getting 855933b02f tired.627f17ed47f68a52

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With Kim Cheolsoo hyung’s personality, if he found it annoying, he would have cut me off. I made excuses to myself while fiddling with my phone. It must have caught my grandfather’s eye. When I came back from my part-time job and was eating dinner, my grandfather returned from the hospital.5d11430a03510069

His hands 51d7d34e82 were full 52b1be2c3a of laundry, a99cb52008 books he 92faf81975 reads to 15919b91e0 grandmother, lunch dee2f47c88 boxes, and 401b7fcb4f other things. Even though he 513313cb0d might get tired bf74c315ed of taking care 53bf39bc0c of grandmother who 09b42a65e7 showed no signs bf83b4e412 of waking up, 47120981d2 grandfather always returned 7658af9d20 from the hospital e2f71f9404 with a bright b5ff193403 face. Then he would 1342c4f15a talk to me ed1cc8be1a for a long 7c45c30718 time about how 2ed0731f1c grandmother was doing 3b088a3fa4 today, what happened.75f7fa9adbc03fdd

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Today was no different, but because I kept looking at my phone and only half-listening, grandfather’s words suddenly stopped. I belatedly realized this and looked up saying “What?” Grandfather was staring at me intently.e674e4aec7b8b2ce

“Are you dating someone?”8e563c44a0c1a10e

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“Hey, no way.”e68655e414e7ced4

“Then why do you 52cf0f5f8c keep checking your phone 9aa0cafc65 for messages when you f1cc97cd6f didn’t receive any notifications?”5098a0ea7fed0ed2

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“Well, just because…” 558e8e08df I quietly flipped d6ff8a377a my phone over. Grandfather seemed 9d5c56acc6 more convinced 8b2e9c8df6 by my fb23608f31 expression and 5643c86e47 pressed on.647c1957ee076850

“Who is it? A girl? A boy? Don’t tell me it’s an Alpha?”4e7e0d218d34b529

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“What’s wrong with an Alpha?”b6cd3f3850d59c36

“It’s an Alpha?!”ff0df51ec09aa8cf

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“I don’t know. And I’m not dating anyone.”29a7c7e421d97a40

But my denial didn’t work.8cca971c0838eaff

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“Is it a classmate? Or someone older? Ack, is it that Yukyuk person who’s always hanging around with you?”0ee038862af13776

“…It’s Euiyun. And he has a boyfriend already. We’re just friends.”6fb7ecd6b22972bb

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“What’s your lover’s name?”122967023e0c02c1

It’s Kim Cheol… ah, I don’t know his real name.Now that 2ee65b03f5 I think c037a900f1 about it, 1a866716cb I didn’t 4dbccf949e know anything f192ea16e0 important about 60239f8e2e him. I’m an 38a4710069 Omega, so 07cdf19f2d I should be848e61c5 have checked 8b4069e03b if he a9ce20c7e2 was an ff4a11f932 Alpha first. But I didn’t 5c7d4fd10d even do that.5bc55ebfba9ae139

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“I told you that I’m not dating anyone. Just someone I met at my part-time job.”f7a965036cd0621f

“…”09e64d6588459dc7

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“Grandpa, stop smiling. It’s creepy.”8881cb0bc74ed525

Grandfather covered his 19f34602df rising lips with 8e1bcfd049 his hand, but 7aace43dbd his eyes were fbd0dbbe12 full of mischievous 2f81e9d6c8 laughter.159ae279d8d135e8

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“Did you fall for each other while working?”9139a30e57f4db79

“I’m telling you it’s not like that.”def0d4f7a6b279fc

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Even though I got annoyed, grandfather’s teasing continued for another 30 minutes. Finally, I gave up first and roughly confessed.294efd32421e4c56

“But you know, I’ve never told him I liked him or anything. We just text like hyung and dongsaeng. But he’s the type of person who would clearly cut things off if he disliked it, yet he doesn’t mind my messages, so I just… have some lingering feelings.”6ef34b7d29f7dfe9

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“You should confess first.”ace8fb47e7a05fca

What? That I like him? But I’m still not sure. Is this flutter what people commonly call love? Wanting to send hundreds of messages a day? Even if it is, I can’t go further than this.49f4a385477f2ed8

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Actually, I was scared 58dd31eeca of him becoming more 3564e0a225 precious to me. Because love 8348e73f5a requires tremendous 9f4aaaef46 responsibility.ceb0111c53341859

My grandfather was proof of that. Grandpa loved grandma so much that it made me want to give up rather than try to follow his steps, thinking I couldn’t reach their level. So while I anxiously waited for Cheolsoo hyung’s replies, I didn’t message him more than twice a day. If I went further, I felt like I wouldn’t be able to control myself.b4c857efc1e51448

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“Why? Afraid of being rejected?”0232a953163ec9ff

When I couldn’t answer, grandfather asked me. Ah, that’s part of it too.I nodded and smiled d55a58b14b awkwardly.e0d3345447d55bf2

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“Well, I’ve already been rejected once. Just… turned down.”3c14e66c95c9f034

At my words, Grandpa’s face became serious.b92f464b223a9ced

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“Is that guy a player?”12a2f73c57030da5

“It’s not like that.”1693c3c7f703922f

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“Then why does he reject you but still lets you text him? From what I see, you always get in touch first.”a0be2a121642447d

“…Was it that obvious?”3f37d9b386d5b2b2

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“Yeah.”826f47703ebb1e84

Grandfather frowned disapprovingly. I lowered my gaze like I’d done something wrong and rubbed the table with my finger.5174e2063826a3b0

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“I guess I like him more.”971aa086b136d639

“…”efdfc8dbb4033b44

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“It’s okay. I’m not that serious either.”9c6e1764de997913

I quickly made excuses, but grandfather’s expression wouldn’t soften. At times like this, changing the topic was best, and fortunately something popped into my mind.08f0f868b92839f5

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“Oh right, Professor Hong from my major said she knew you? But she didn’t seem to like you.”b26a2287c4e3af8a

This worked right away on him, who took pride in his title as the neighborhood’s popular figure.37c2ce95add1d908

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“Professor Hong? Who?”2d844ad19696eff5

When I mentioned her eb7e2f3c8f name, my grandfather snorted 4e2f3040c9 in disbelief.fc78cec5f6ae3528

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“Ha! That show-off is your professor?! Ha!”a98debdf82ea62e5

“I don’t know about showing off, but she’s really impressive.”5697e68767e68770

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“Yeah, she was quite great indeed!”c242b6a0e2cee988

True to his 68854021d1 nature, my grandpa 384d896313 admitted it right 67e970ada9 away. But he quickly 7a637f73a6 found a flaw.66800bbbc48803cf

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“She was so arrogant just because she could paint well. She took a peek at one of my paintings and outright said it was just okay, can you believe it?  I’ll never forget that until I die!”532f895eb932eded

I felt a c0250340c1 strong sense of c5c331859b déjà vu. I had dde2db952e heard similar 0661ff878c words from 709f62aeb6 the professor.246ee34cb09b822b

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‘Just okay.’7a614088e8bc3c85

‘…That’s why I’m here to learn’db493e8f5acab7cf

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‘Even if you learn, you can’t catch up to natural talent.’144ee5237f77fec9

I unconsciously looked 81e9dc60ba at my future.Surely I won’t end up like grandpa… right?Regardless of d8472c3de6 my wavering 6f51c9a18e eyes, Grandfather d9ff379b23 was busy 9cd0082926 criticizing Professor 30ad081dfb Hong. But if e9769b32dd you listened 1e3baf1a9a carefully, it 6320abd9ba was all 7057cbb9e0 petty jealousy 9a2af51d83 about him b2c9b055e6 being bitter 5485f9b2f4 that Professor 78b78b29e3 Hong was afc2c15344 a genius.47b4d2d053d86ae7

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“But you have to look at the long term. No matter how much of a genius she is, there will come a time when she stops painting, right? Then I, who has been consistently painting without rest, might surpass her someday! What do you think? She’s too busy teaching to paint, right?”a0da0c5c9b732010

“No. She spends all his free time only on her artwork.”025f0f5bbee411c9

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“…Still?”3bbb942fd98847b5

“Yeah.”15d84e2afcec673e

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While Grandfather was deflated by his competitor’s persistence, at least my love story was forgotten. That night, I think I lay in bed trying to resist the urge to look at my phone screen. Like an addict, I would unconsciously pick up my phone, but then force myself to put it down with reason, and repeat this over and over. That night, I couldn’t sleep until dawn.fb2dec1eb5700760

My first winter break c2dda445b0 flowed similarly to that d69cc05f83 dawn. Being happy dd36a3dd7f with those 9ea643267c few short bbaedb5804 replies that c265cf81d5 came each 7074fc61e8 day, but ef3d2196b1 forcibly holding eb51c07422 back when 957a7aec21 I wanted 52cb848ec0 to contact 4432628fe7 more, again 47c6d25960 and again. Just this much ad7f78f510 and no more. It was like walking 93f6688213 a tightrope, carefully balancing d6f232f58c not to cross the 6c66343f20 line of affection.ec014cebab248ea9

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That’s how the vacation ended. I was quite excited on the day I went back to Seoul. Maybe I 0e6c222dda can meet 4cf74896b2 him? Since I 9673df06a0 told him 732ea359c7 I was f008fd434e coming up 0a9d758ed7 today, will c02d307ef9 he be 4dafe096a2 waiting for f47aafd24f me at 615193b20a the bus 5d6a32de9b stop?I got off the 20a2dbefcf bus while having such 32e49cf92d silly delusions. Of course, no one 42a0e9ff2e was waiting for me. The only text I 72c1d3acb6 received was a good 4b6cac6934 morning.1819693f135bfcc3

‘I’m going up today. Are you busy, hyung?’9740206f54901e6a

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‘Same as always.’0f412cdff54cfc54

Right, he’s always busy anyway. It’s not like I asked him to come meet me. Even though I knew there was no actual reason to feel disappointed deep in me, I couldn’t help but to feel down. The tightrope I’d been walking well was now old and about to break. These kinds of text messages weren’t enough anymore. Lying on the bed after opening the door to my studio apartment after several months, I realized. Ah, I’m going to confess to him first after all. And… get rejected?320c14216ef09187

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***de5e83978c4f5c55

Starting my second year’s first semester, I became a diligent student. In other words, I threw myself into painting like crazy. Perhaps I was slightly intoxicated by my situation of liking someone but not being able to easily achieve that love. Simply put, I lost my mind.91755ac2b9661852

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If I were 7e5a1defca to make excuses, 793ee82f5b it was my 127aafdaeb first time liking e8cc79df72 someone, and I 841aaca4ca was still young. But even 65e486f1c6 if it cdfb92e843 was immature d16677db27 confidence, channeling 2d0f818fad that energy 5e4552dd07 into painting 47b42c153d was a f26fe5996e good thing c8d346ee06 in retrospect. Of course, 6f12f7bf0f the paintings 80197f4bfd I made d15a4b6b07 then made dca71c6951 no sense. They were bizarre experimental 1de0ed8255 works that made people e3e49ce27d around me say things 5e7dab3af7 like,ed71dc4b7f87d80c

‘Do you have a grudge against society?’a22f66c313f1f701

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‘Is your goal to get expelled this semester?’084dbde92d39bb89

My friends 5b008db7c5 tried to 3ada20f4ef give me f96d0c0636 advice out c4719a6b25 of goodwill, 51a099bbf7 but at 7281332b6b the time, fed8cb9198 I closed b492d7a0ba my ears, 93598708d3 thinking no 6a6f6a4f13 one understood 7f92dc0b6b my art. Looking back 8e604c818d now, I 99ca7cfce9 was truly 6773bfb780 being immature bfedbf995e at that 4ca2e02ac9 time, and ac9334a342 even I ee2c00db2e cringed at ff5bf24c62 the results. But this period b7414284a6 wasn’t entirely wasted.4255a0b3f985a299

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Even though c1572159e4 it was 7d30c23ce7 just over a6bb7f852f a month, 8d455508dc this uncharacteristic 3b3b3e00aa deviation influenced de1cdc7743 the paintings a11f8fbb2c I wanted f82f5cafef to create b2ab1f4a84 afterward. To use an analogy, 8b453c4999 it was like coloring 5a4c7dd6cc within beautifully drawn borders, 0ccca44722 then suddenly crossing that c10bbcc412 line. Though the 78b6c0b35e picture was f4dbfa9567 ruined, stepping ffe7f03bb7 back revealed a31f18795b that with 5ecc327bd4 modifications, it f4df5bcd2a could become edf4471827 a completely 2ad8256790 different picture.85aa978ce24cdfc7

Anyway, at that time, I couldn’t confess for over a month, using the excuse of being busy painting. I was still only in contact with Cheolsoo hyung through text messages. But sometimes my delusions would spiral from my misconceptions. It was because Cheolsoo hyung would sometimes accurately guess my actions as if he had some kind of clairvoyance.b9159de3f24e5510

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‘I nearly died of lack of sleep during my afternoon class. I think I ate too much for lunch. Saebyeok had said he’d eat with me so I waited, but he suddenly got called away by friends from another major, so I ate later than usual. Saebyeok really has connections everywhere. Seems like he knows the whole school. Ah, he became the Omega representative for the school, so he definitely knows all the Omegas.’2ec22d1dd2ed3725

‘Stop eating ramyeon.’ad2a4fad737d4c2c

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How can words be eb9d64a25e so blunt?I marveled 6c2d7ef4a5 at his e67ad0422f short replies 5d15b41ec4 every time, 3d3d9102a2 then suddenly 1cb3029ae8 wondered. Did I 7d27c92aed tell him a23a894836 I ate 35c4b1ce5d ramen? But I quickly dismissed 440a674ad4 the doubt. I had been eating d75b20d5db ramyeon quite often lately.f5721d5266a51c8e

One day, 1b60aa2979 after eating 5f0f50860e dinner at a1eeaeba36 the Student 5f5e50666c Union Building, 48a4c399ab I sent ef0dcd063a a text. The Student 760fad9017 Union is 551bb0bab1 connected to d64cc47f3b the next 9b04dbd51d building by 02b070de6e a skybridge, ac65b7894b and I f4acfe4800 was standing 603dfddc0f in the 4d005c9b79 middle of 71a42d3631 it. The adjacent building was 9ae2ef160a the development center, so f613147a87 almost no one crossed 3088751912 this skybridge, making it dba40b52d2 one of my favorite bbbf03a4d0 places. That’s why a307c275ea I would ec3293f925 sometimes stand 6f6cb3e056 alone in c9a4cfc5b5 the middle c9e8319b08 of the e8f45d6aa8 bridge like 66e7cadf6d this and f243a39de4 briefly watch e62ed80d97 the sunset c81a71a009 or evening 95c3ef64eb sky.b20458b80b4bb17e

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‘Are you busy, hyung? Quick, look at the sky right now. Wow, the sky is really beautiful this evening. It’s like someone spilled red paint across the sky.’b629ae72b115c8a2

Since sunsets disappear 9ba52e725a quickly, I waited 498835297f for his reply 054ce9c4a3 while stomping my b0bcb530aa feet impatiently. After all, such beautiful 30ebb3db1d sunsets only happen once d0ee9e8c27 or twice a year. Fortunately, a 824b9f1e05 reply came 34f7f1d005 after about 3edcb98c31 three minutes.3b269e1d29088786

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‘Must have used a lot of paint.’8f668bb0bb3484e2

Though it was 4111cc7f56 a reply without 5c333a8416 even 1g of 423069d0d6 romance, I found 8338c56c1e myself smirking and dd3dca0db7 teased him.3126c077b6537ac3

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‘Isn’t it so pretty that you’d go bankrupt over paint?’f7840e10f3692e55

‘Shouldn’t go bankrupt just because something’s pretty.’7e4cc3374d81e6a1

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The image of him 91f6aed9ea refusing going bankrupt with ae7eda6e6f a blank, resolute expression c9621870ed naturally came to mind. I couldn’t stop fff068953d laughing as I 32f33a76bf had anticipated his 21dc3ba546 annoyed reaction. I knew 73c2c24d14 from experience 9a9d945bca that he 82b8c1162b hated unrealistic 2f74c76ad1 scenarios.b1cf1f8b3396d00c

‘What’s so scary about bankruptcy? Don’t worry, if you go bankrupt, I’ll take care of you, hyung.’7b2f7d966fc2fccf

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‘If I go bankrupt, abandon me.’6a59ce3b33ba66a5

The remains of my laughter finally disappeared. Cheolsoo hyung was probably just being realistic again, but those words stuck in my heart. How could he tell me to ‘abandon’ him so easily? So I hesitated and couldn’t send a reply right away. Then hyung’s message came first.b4bc0c85979f5f6d

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‘Go home now.’4f14bfe372e30c13

‘Huh? How did you know I wasn’t home?’a59d3c64885f4869

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The reply 579a1c660c came a f5ac3cf3e3 bit late.ddeb28f1d026617e

‘It’s obvious.’9a8780eaf5267c70

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Well, it is obvious. I’ve been practically living at school these days. The conversation seemed to end there as no more messages came. Unable to let go, I waited until it was completely dark, watching my phone. My fingers hovered over the message window, touching words I couldn’t write, deleting them, then repeating.b4ebf5dbfc08f346

Should we meet? Don’t you want to see me?dcd45bdba1853947

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I felt pathetic for still hesitating in front of that line even though I’d decided to cross it. But I just couldn’t muster the courage.97015a12f7a5a296

Okay, I’ll do a91e8554d2 it right after 08209a3c66 I finish this 9e64d43c41 assignment. I really want a4a43154f2 to do well c6e6a93f4f on this one.  And then, I’ll really tell him.755330cb0b49dbaa

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I’ll tell e7849c991d him that ce32d55df0 I like d0464136c9 him.8b0fa61bd5a0fd8e

43639142b7c9cacc

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