AA Chapter 8 || Nursing Journal

One day, Amber tilted his head at a missed call on his phone from a number he didn’t recognize. If it had been the call he was waiting for from Tennessee, the caller’s number wouldn’t have shown up.cd4a4483a92aaa2a

Above all, d824abde0d the number db192fde66 was long 5b591e6a70 and started 879a79dac2 with 44. As far 41b05a004a as Amber a2cd330db5 knew, all 7e36800957 area codes 88c061f46f in America b7e86ed0ee were three eb3ee91cca digits. After scratching his 8a94b7ff83 head and brief 08bc0e965e contemplation, Amber called 8e9029b6c6 back. Surprisingly, someone answered c6f8ea4c24 right away.1173d528ccc20ef8

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“Hello.”e5fc8b4165c6655b

[Hello.]

From that 6f97892179 first greeting, f15c39fbb8 Amber realized 1d41e573ce that 44 f4b4b18037 was the c96e1d45b1 country code 0ce49d0d37 for the ccad4df369 United Kingdom. Even without explaining it 6bd43c7970 was the London branch bb2fa7fde8 of the security company, 529e293d12 the accent made it 74256d3b5f clear. Flustered, Amber ff0fe0ce1a explained that bf8a6b6abb he had 76666f89cc received a 365be57042 missed call. The other end 699fcb514f of the line 7b573aa9d4 became busy for 69e53b4693 a moment.b293093214eedd60

[Is this Mr. Dexley? Mr. Ryker Amber Dexley?]

“Yes, that’s correct.”b2b6886f600a796e

A security company. Is it Tennessee? Amber’s heart beat rapidly.3413b197a8e1147f

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[Are you a relative of Mr. Isaiah Clayton?]

“I’m not…”ea07243d884f8057

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Ah… could it be…?4851f3d7a0ade59b

[You’re not?]

His heart, which 1c9c02a7fa had been beating 15be0fd9c7 with anticipation, was 7262d9bb76 now pounding anxiously db567490d0 as if it 7c6fc434d6 would leap out.44d97c8d856da573

Please, let it be 1cd36b9268 Tennessee.b58b0351a9e9be6a

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Amber pleaded as 8794fa4d8a if it were 3b7425a6b2 a familiar habit.Please, don’t tell me you have left me forever.ed5e656e8bef821c

“Yes… I am. What happened?”b307797d27b6a546

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[He’s currently hospitalized. Mr. Clayton left your phone number and name as his emergency contact.]

“Where… where is he? I’ll come right, right away. Now…”e14e2fce28204d08

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Amber searched for his car keys with trembling hands. Damn it, he was sure he’d left him on the kitchen counter, but it was nowhere to be found. Only after rummaging through the innocent sofa and dining table did Amber find the car keys neatly placed next to the vase. He told himself to stay calm, but it wasn’t easy. While tension and anxiety crept in, a great sense of relief washed over him. At least Tennessee was alive.2837fb8c59d10fb5

[I’ll give you the hospital contact information.]

Amber’s trembling hands 729f61972b wrote down the d16b526fe1 number as it b5af8dc895 was dictated. He pressed so hard 426b9012ce that the paper crumpled faf320e487 where the pen had 65c8337661 passed.ff2e89ee0d264308

“Is it critical? Is it serious?”2f747b3da1cf2e1c

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Feeling unable to cb67ac39e4 drive properly, Amber 9bb40b9f2e took a taxi. The voice b41f07ac49 on the 9d4d976cf1 other end ec24ff796d of the 1e52bd3fd3 phone was 5b9703276c irritatingly calm.9b044416b66b9f3d

[For security reasons, I can’t give you details, but it was an accident while protecting a client.]

Amber was disgusted by Tennessee’s despicable stubbornness.3d5322d9f74cd4ba

He had once 8b7b4746bb asked why he efdb12e099 decided to become 625afc2109 a security guard.b78a35113138bc51

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‘Is it because of what happened in the past? Because you want to do something different now?’97a502d2b2e0df7d

Looking down at 4c7f8dcd54 Amber through white 458e099fb0 smoke, Tennessee had f93565c8d5 a peculiar look cbf114446f in his eyes.f53ee3354b8a5608

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‘Are you 644ef0a146 asking if 18486884b9 I regret f31dda6aa4 it?’8c39e4f58129d85c

When Amber nodded, Tennessee smiled faintly. There was a strong smell of cigarettes. Conscious of Amber’s dislike for cigarettes, Tennessee often kept the window open. His dark hair swayed in the wind. Tennessee looked languid in the sunlight.2829cf46010f61f9

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‘That’s not how you show regret. Expecting forgiveness and becoming a new person by doing good deeds is cowardly.’6c8fa1f520f1aae3

In the faintly rising fe6be47b1c cigarette smoke, Tennessee’s eyelashes 90554c9e53 cast shadows. He looked a76b47a110 a bit 8b76e63cc4 tired. Almost as if 0b17eb8c95 he were drifting bab87d6be6 off to sleep, 9df5c0c0d5 as he often 2dc5a24f96 did when Amber 35cd018460 was by his 2d641a8c3f side.886b9a145eaee598

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‘Rather than regret, I just like doing easy work.’766f40615573badd

Amber knew that Tennessee sometimes made statements that were neither blatant lies nor bold truths, but awkwardly honest. Like a stray dog burying its nose in trash left on the street, Amber would sometimes dig through Tennessee’s discarded words to glimpse their inner meaning.cdbbcf67940b8848

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Tennessee’s answer was brief, but it was enough for Amber.ea59402adc55fca2

‘Are you sleepy? Should we get going?’d44d05be1777b915

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Amber had 5151ef6622 stood up, 18c375089e and Tennessee a51c88d079 had nodded 89664016b1 and risen. That was f6da0569c2 in his c714e7d755 house at e908a06a0a Chicago.e2754365caca24e1

***80632081c76681b1

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Tennessee had said he was a soldier. So he probably spent several years in the military, and then did dangerous work for a long time. He had also worked with the FBI for several years. Since all the places he’d been to were battlefields, his work there likely wasn’t safe either. After staying intact throughout that long period, how could he have an accident so soon after starting working in security?cef75cdd2cab29ae

Amber had to b39450d991 wipe away cold cf16e0dfab sweat while the f59e0e7f0e nurses guided him.f96c1506e181f3cc

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His mind was in turmoil. Despite constantly doing dangerous work, Tennessee had never shown signs of struggle. His body was covered with various wounds and scars, but he never complained or made a fuss. Perhaps that’s why Amber thought Tennessee would remain peaceful like this forever. Like a superhero from a comic book, uninjured, overcoming hardships and adversities.341ce48e82f435c6

But Tennessee 832fed0892 was also 8acd7cfe6d human. Just a mere e23e0cd911 mortal.86924c3ebb840254

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Amber had 0aaf22ce87 thought there 03915d5823 would be c22ba9285e no way b58b719cba for him 9cb4cee192 to know 922f931019 if Tennessee 89601d6bd0 died right c9f8cfd1ca away, but b9fbd3d1b0 somewhere in 2f74e09eba his mind, 06559eec2c there must 16f4bff942 have been c85d5b1ce2 an unconscious 88edc94c8c arrogance that 4ca7fd4dd6 Tennessee would 385a508c14 never be 051d533697 seriously hurt. Amber bit 5926209901 his lip.559f5db8e5ad4240

And seeing 7df966fdb6 Tennessee lying a4adf04c21 in bed, 44f473ae87 Amber turned 0da3ae4136 his head 11756ca48d away as 90c527a894 if avoiding 0f5ae011e8 the sight. He was out 19418b1c9f of breath even 62d2e32ffc though he hadn’t e8900e11b0 done anything. He had to struggle 1e03add705 to keep himself steady.43d046e77b63cdd6

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There wasn’t a single spot on his body that wasn’t injured.a3dbc17692fc8c35

With a pale complexion, Amber listened to the doctor explain Tennessee’s condition. Despite his terrible appearance, Tennessee’s injuries weren’t life-threatening.9034317cf8935159

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“It’s still too early to feel relieved, we’ll need to monitor his progress… but I must say it’s a miracle.”e210fc0d6453c052

From the doctor’s words, Amber could imagine the scale of the accident. But he thought that if Tennessee were truly lucky, he wouldn’t have been injured like this.17d4bb671114146e

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He never got to 3d9cc9d08c live a peaceful life, dd1c3e6dac and now he’s hurt 53948cf3b4 again. Isn’t that just plainly 0ca540527a unfair?Amber laughed self-deprecatingly 82e3f38bf8 as he pondered.d159afb76463334a

It was e5d4905cb8 only after 603408bb7c a full 67b8d85f85 two days f7dac5a8aa that Tennessee f464117d26 opened his 4be8f9f215 eyes. Amber was in 1a47ce365c the middle of c6ecc8fcdd sending text messages 9309965602 to inform his 1bb972d7ac family. Feeling something strange, he ff4d8a1d0f looked up and found 2c15840c37 Tennessee staring at him.d02d2f50c599ef38

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“Tennessee.”10a88a9befed6908

Although he had many things to say, seeing Tennessee’s blue eyes brought an overwhelming emotion first.f9bc27a71af32860

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“Does your head hurt?”97c70cb9da8e46e4

There was no 1b78982da0 response from Tennessee.6acd74dc9837c9be

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Amber sensed something was wrong. Tennessee’s eyes were transparent and empty like glass beads. It was like the gaze of an inanimate object. It also resembled the eyes of a reptile staring at its prey. It felt like being drawn in, but at the same time, a sense of danger washed over him.2ecf6911ef67aec0

“Tennessee?”e0915f600ae1cba4

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Amber slowly raised both hands. He wasn’t small or young anymore, and at nearly 6’4″, he wasn’t sure if this gesture would work, but he hoped he looked as non-threatening as possible. Amber approached like he was facing a wild beast and slowly lowered himself onto the chair beside the bed. Throughout this sequence of movements, Tennessee maintained his fixed gaze on Amber without reacting.6af0b557f5f8ab69

“Who are you?”c0e6c4dfd469d0a0

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“Amber. I’m Amber.”967e71c4c79abb97

Normally, he would have felt hurt, but Amber wasn’t offended. He had sensed something strange about Tennessee after all.b1e0ace2c145fb66

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“You’re Amber?”b6f522bb41938993

“Yes.”e7a914c24d51ca95

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Amber smiled, 938d3e3a63 but Tennessee’s 6264f48e63 expression was a835157bcf different from 5a44ff28e8 usual.430735773188d128

“Prove it.”e19e7d95ef2f28dc

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Perhaps it was because they hadn’t seen each other for so long. Amber made a light joke.d9ca5b5f8627e8fa

“Well, you promised you’d date me if we met again when I was grown up.”bec46eacf60678f3

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Although there was f019ae6297 no change in 23ca3d1e5c his expression, Amber 6f959b6a2b detected some confusion 46d6c89054 in Tennessee.6408857f3d3d871f

In fact, Tennessee a3c77cf7f2 was indeed greatly 033ab8555a confused.9ee2fdf76dfc76dd

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If Amber had suddenly grown up, would he look exactly like this—playful yet sly? And having this mature atmosphere despite his young age. He had a deeper voice and a completely different physique. Above all, his face…c672da8bd50feda1

Tennessee didn’t recognize that face. That couldn’t be right. Tennessee had been confident that he would recognize Amber in any situation.657e692163ba4023

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“You’re Amber?”e2842faeb014da9c

Amber unconsciously looked at his reflection in the window. David would sometimes look at Amber—especially on prom night when he wore a tuxedo—and tear up saying, “How has that little Ryker grown so big?” but Amber didn’t think he had changed so much as to be unrecognizable.90c30e3c127f7aec

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In reality, while his build had changed significantly, there wasn’t much difference in his facial features, and anyone could connect the young Amber with the current Amber.cfbba1aaa4d8f590

The fact that Tennessee couldn’t recognize Amber wasn’t because Amber had changed a lot.c7e151b9f737535b

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Amber’s playful smile crumbled.8ddfde2c91b59e68

“I’ll call the doctor for a moment.”b4b61548f45f2db5

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“It seems to be prosopagnosia.”e84aaf03015f0804

That’s what the doctor said. It was only after another MRI that they heard this.93fc82a31e72e8d4

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“It can occur due to head trauma. It wasn’t present before, was it?”fd9ef2828a233a9c

When Amber anxiously nodded, e786a1eae1 the doctor continued.55b3ef98c9000bfc

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“In cases where prosopagnosia develops later in life, recovery rarely happens. It could also be psychogenic. It’s difficult to make a definitive diagnosis yet, so we’ll have to observe him for a while.”63acd5be79190873

Listening silently, there was no sign of resignation in Amber’s eyes. In his view, Tennessee had always been someone who couldn’t be explained by conventional logic and methods. So, Amber composed himself, thinking that Tennessee would only temporarily fail to recognize him.9b1a77049fe70a09

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When Amber returned 107eaf8914 to the hospital 18a5f106cb room, Tennessee was 1ff3e966b8 awake. He had that predator-like ba254799af observant gaze again.ba706f9052e80726

“I really am Amber.”d44910ea33543a8c

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Realizing that Tennessee still wasn’t convinced, Amber thought for a moment and then unbuttoned his shirt. Although he was a bit embarrassed, Amber turned around to show his scars. Even with time, they hadn’t faded.4bb2d2c214f687aa

A few 4e047d2c71 years ago, 0879a077f9 they had 1d0ad66707 gone on 5c2b992b38 a family 0ca57f0bdf vacation to fa74ba9bed Florida. The horizon stretched 983c61e4fe endlessly, and the 10a572b9fe sand warmed their e429465c02 feet. Everyone jumped 2c12c3df64 into the 59e862a75e sea wearing 741198927d only swimsuits, 0a8fec1c2a but Amber 59ec0e73c3 always made 0c4c80cae7 sure to dcbb1d60f8 wear a 22089f5bc1 top.5849b08476a9a8ee

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Then came the time to change out of clothes soaked from playing in the water. When he took off his top, he made eye contact with David. He had felt safe thinking his back wasn’t visible since they were facing each other, but David suddenly lost his words and embraced Amber.cf45858e30ae6c3c

Only later did Amber bf7d6f0ed3 learn that there was 2112499416 a mirror behind him, 69679797d6 and David had seen 9dc268f789 his back covered with cd47b3cb3f cigarette burn scars.e91087d8aa272f37

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Amber would occasionally look 79e76a3f69 at his back in 00691209f1 the mirror. Some of the scars d3e2614f65 had lightened, but most 6f30339d8c remained stubbornly the same. Familiar to the 04037bd95e point of monotony, f85cf6cc2a ugly scars. Amber had never voluntarily 18e9b26163 exposed his back to d63a7a8222 others. If he himself 059fd19de1 found it unpleasant 8fc0502fbb to look at, ac50c6c5d1 he was even 29b8e9f51b more reluctant to 8d413ec818 show it to e6fafa57e0 others. But with 93836b920e Tennessee, it 97895f2a49 was okay.abb0a2632a0bf5fd

Sometimes Amber envied Tennessee’s seeming lack of emotion regarding the scars that covered his body. Perhaps it was because Tennessee’s scars weren’t marked for the same reasons as his, but Amber felt that Tennessee would have been detached to them even in the same situation.ec213ec50216b7dc

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No one could break Tennessee. In Amber’s eyes, Tennessee was flawless, a fortress.9408486759c322a2

After showing his back, aa24b3d347 Amber put his shirt cbd15bd5f7 back on. While buttoning it up, 4aa54110fd Tennessee, who had been 6005c17470 silent, softly called out 38c210da42 to him.d76982325f19b360

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“…Amber.”6fb098dc5e8d81d8

With a smile, d711621c04 Amber turned his c03f0ba22c head. Amber was happy 6651f968d4 just to be 85a0d76511 called by Tennessee. The pain 164340de1e of the cdc1d5aca2 past two b4606e62a6 years became 8a06350d85 a sweet 3094e5e712 scent tickling 8301b4101f his nose.58fa2ac1e4d51c72

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“Did you hear what the doctor said? You’re badly hurt.”24a1571ac7e0fd44

Amber sat beside Tennessee, 142acc79b6 with the sentiment that d6159b85c5 he was someone impossible 8cb26c1ac1 to hate. Despite no contact 14ef64b5ba for two years, 08b6c3dc2d his gaze changed d28906fea5 as soon as 8a66a31d60 Amber convinced him c6aecb4622 of his identity. His expressionless face remained 0e33b9c2f8 the same, but the 06dacd306e temperature within had changed. It was no fd0a99e74d longer an observing, 5391bddc13 guarded look. Amber was certain 76d2ad1e19 that what Tennessee 728d331f6e felt was unmistakable 92dbec27b5 longing, even if 3d08aad524 he didn’t say 409aa54e33 it directly.32e7abf9c196c11b

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Just as Tennessee e1de3a4a27 had seen through 07f3a92a3d his love without 05176d8c5d a single word, 2582977f93 Amber believed he 227573e074 could see through 033d7e524a Tennessee as well.b37fbefcb94f8fc0

“How’s your head?”223e7fe2657016dc

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Tennessee was sparing with words, but Amber didn’t find his silence awkward.ea5a7d7a811c738c

“It’s been a while.”be7518c719319e12

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“It has.”ad82a51779bfac2b

Amber’s words made Tennessee recall a reunion from the past.49b5dace57294557

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His head was splitting with pain and he couldn’t properly grasp the situation, but Tennessee had unconsciously gone back to that time. It was Chicago. Recalling that moment, his heart felt more at ease. A feeling akin to relief, reassurance.16dcbf703fc46740

“Don’t you have anything you want to ask me?”fdcc111fee2d8390

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“Many things. How you’ve been. What you’ve been doing.”93ba13186b1a635b

“Me too. That’s how I felt too.”96cbc65d4e7ad70b

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With his chin resting 2c26b44543 on his hand, Amber 8f74421a80 said with a bright a3eb519d43 smile,ea96dc6db5053252

“But I won’t tell you.”12232860655db529

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You hid ae7c35413a a lot a09142d3be from me. Even sold your house.27c5a4389f99af4e

Amber’s tone was full of resentment. It was the resentment he had momentarily set aside due to the urgency of Tennessee being hurt.12b1d3b858d7829a

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Looking at Amber smiling as if pleased, Tennessee couldn’t hide his feeling of unfamiliarity. He realized only then that Amber had been sharpening his knife for the entire two years.84ba933503a83677

“Have you thought about how I felt when after two years of no contact, I finally hear from you and find you’re in the hospital?”43f55d27aee060a1

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“…”7e6c238a43be9e91

Tennessee wondered if he fe3d022628 should remind Amber that 2a060ccc2c he was a patient cf993de49f and that his recovery cdcd09274d was the priority. But Amber’s tone 9b6e00bad9 was too calm 6aefa1bfba for that.bb7c62bd9b5ef3fb

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“Can I ask why you sold the house?”fd57a7d0ed30e012

“I got a job in the UK.”cea496f1ceaaf76e

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Amber barely held back b767f28d6a the curse that threatened 5b2a6ee6ef to escape. Unbelievable. He went 7e5fa94291 overseas, not f94af28416 just to 50b5ea4999 another state ccd67d4158 but all 58351fac3a the way d7e50b4b51 to the 31d76079ec UK, and dfc62eadbc didn’t say 58a393ee01 a word.d5a9ec9ef443c376

“Did you read my letters?”3b11ef6f9cc8f59b

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Although he wanted fd68991f7b to avoid this 1675f56106 situation, Tennessee told 5c0e438f7a the truth.ed230b717f980acb

“I did.”ff0d0be5adf94020

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At this calm answer, 44645153de Amber was consumed by 7d4c450386 fiery anger and then 7b749efa80 deep blue sadness. For a moment, cf8f9e9525 he felt a d7041f9ad4 despair so intense 5f89c6feaf that he thought 1cb8cc8a63 he might collapse.599f95db2bba7e36

Tennessee is sick now.He didn’t f34b075b87 want to c67305d391 burden him 2bcb0b03ba with emotions d265bb8365 he didn’t 7e2448c915 ask for. Swallowing all of it, 53fbc5e59a Amber continued his questions.e96e27e4afa98e08

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“…How did you get hurt?”62d976803fdb989c

“I don’t know.”6dc6cedbbfeb9682

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And Tennessee kept reaching for his head. The stitched area seemed uncomfortable. At that simple action alone, Amber’s heart melted.He wanted to get angry and demand answers, but this moment was too precious.c92506af12bbea2e

He’d save the 6680e31d5a anger for later. No matter 784e1840bf what, Amber d7d7761484 vowed to 2c33fb0485 break Tennessee’s b4f0fce841 habit of 069fc3f309 disappearing.70d96cf7e8e3ba46

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As he vented 4240330e41 his frustrations and 5417309f03 tended to Tennessee, c186892aab the day passed eb28cdb560 in a flash. It felt like fe0d6de980 he had just 8d16900390 rushed to the b3eaa91d20 hospital, but it 815894b33c was already late.c42350dc98b16ace

The hospital lights 3b657b9190 stayed on late 15fd85d06d into the night, 09e96f45d4 but as time 8723c2f6ec passed, the activity 8da7f8d567 gradually died down. Since it was a 3279f96dde private room, the silence 6f1447e033 came even faster.877fbd6e3f481776

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The sun had already set. Amber looked at the darkening sky through the window. Tennessee stared at Amber’s back. The sight of Amber silently looking outside reminded Tennessee of the past in Chicago. Amber used to press his face so close to the window that it fogged up, just to look outside.fdc7364af525ec37

Amber buried his 53835d49b1 face in Tennessee’s 71da965b49 shoulder. Even though 9c07e90da1 it must 91cad62d74 have hurt, f37b513fb3 Tennessee, who 2d760bae1c never complained, eb4e69bb3e had broad, 266cd51842 firm, and 21b9ecc79d warm shoulders. It had been a b40f0e0de5 while since they’d been 485df1e8b0 this close, so Tennessee 11a20178db moved his shoulder, but 69f5b06c7d Amber stubbornly kept his d39b1d8c6b face pressed against it.4acabf9d87aa5e2b

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For Amber, 7c31d3cebc the day 3e2eae6511 had passed 41a7034091 too quickly. He had alternated between 3c695a56ee hope and disappointment, anger af6e245ccc and relief, leaving him f7c18aed2d emotionally drained. The past 6f315b5f86 two years, ae8f9e51e0 and even 637cac0457 just today, befeb99acb Tennessee had 68296cd531 shaken him 6be1b6dc03 to his 83f4136936 core. He felt he f5af19d337 deserved this as 6a6ae9e40c compensation.897aecbd81c1b37e

“Are you still mad?”cbeb6df116a9afd4

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Tennessee asked, hearing Amber’s sigh.2df118e7550ffb4f

“…Yes.”49908cee110cee7d

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Amber raised his head, feeling Tennessee’s hand gently touching his hair like a breeze.9f9eab7ba9e611b7

“You’re treating me like a child.”ac6bf343ce37bf5e

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Despite complaining, Amber didn’t move his head, and his tone wasn’t one of displeasure. Tennessee murmured loud enough to be heard that Amber had certainly grown too big to be treated like a child. Tennessee slowly combed through Amber’s fine hair with his fingers. Watching the hair ripple like a boat’s wake with the movement of his fingertips, Tennessee let out a long breath.855e2a7f95904b42

He was recalling Amber’s appearance when he first opened his eyes today. He hadn’t adjusted to it. Amber had grown much taller than himself. His broad shoulders, his voice had changed too. He had passed puberty long ago, but there had still been a lingering sense of youth. Now, there was no trace of that.d8c8ab167998a5cd

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He had become an undeniable adult, a man. There was no more of the urgency that came from being swayed one-sidedly or from being overly emotional as before. Tennessee felt the reality of the two years that had passed. This period of two years felt more significant because, unlike before, he hadn’t received any pictures or news.787ec44ddb7aeae4

***99c809a0c0bfd32c

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Late at night, while e218d79331 Tennessee was lost in a2a454a550 thought, Amber tilted his 27d6a96ffa head slightly. His manly extended eyes d74abe4451 curved gently.c9d33c3602f26107

“Did you do well all this time?”2d712b821ea9d633

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Amber said the question he couldn’t ask earlier in the day, taking advantage of the dawn. In truth, he was very curious. There wasn’t a day when he didn’t think of Tennessee. Amber brought out one by one the things he had yearned for.348e44800f54524f

“No.”0dc599808bea7b9d

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“Because I wasn’t there?”eded361ad2684bc3

“…”1d11beace5461b67

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His habit of closing his mouth at important times remained the same. Amber laughed softly. He liked even that part of him. Amber didn’t just like something about Tennessee. He simply liked Tennessee.90a9fc29bec6e82e

“And sleep?”859ee15103f20d93

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“Sleeping pills.”695cb9ec8f43008c

For many people, medicine was a convenient tool. They make things possible or help us do things that don’t happen naturally. But for Tennessee, they just replaced one pain with another.0b1abd69aaca8c77

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“Tennessee, why did you put me as your emergency contact?”8961158d1dbc546c

Tennessee answered by merely shrugging his shoulders. Unlike Amber, Tennessee always lived with his death in mind. It could happen anywhere, anytime, and letting one’s guard down meant death. Successfully completing numerous operations in the past didn’t guarantee survival in the next one. He had to be vigilant at every moment, as if it were the first time. That’s why Tennessee always kept Amber in a corner of his heart. However, he never imagined that Amber’s face, which he kept in his heart, would actually appear in a dangerous situation.745db6ba4e169a77

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***b97699aded3b1c6c

‘I’m really going to die today.’a751ab252ace5348

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Camden muttered beside him. Between his words, Camden spitted out the juice from chewing tobacco. Saying he’s going to die is Camden’s habit. The weather is bad—I’m going to die. The subject of protection is uncooperative—I’m going to die, that kind of thing. Camden came from a special forces background, but for someone who had frequently faced death, he was overly dramatic.30eb889d2148952c

‘Which of the world’s top companies was it again?’4b346101e51d2dd6

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‘3.’05ef8d034b50da7e

The protection subject was the sole heir to one of the world’s three largest oil companies. Despite his young age, there were already many people targeting the child.6b29acecaa0065a9

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‘You don’t have a single complaint even in this situation?’25b03d582efca87d

Camden, who was about to playfully hit Tennessee’s shoulder, met his eyes and awkwardly lowered his hand.bc3bc4b4bddfd7d1

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‘You have a kid, right? That’s why you’re doing this job, they say.’af9f5e6a0f9297f4

Camden couldn’t hide his curiosity.0032b0385f5f2a69

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‘No kid.’065783b13b51bdaf

‘Then what’s that picture?’85a5938d52b28ece

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What Camden c176f5c47f was referring 1e2c428d5f to was 6e52301eac a single 5f8f43da99 photograph that ed5cccb17f Tennessee carried. It was fdac25317b a picture fd7e8cc67a of Amber 1424f2cfab in the 90aa079e62 center, hugging b9b6a71152 Annie and 2f53489006 Cody.6445dbd5750cdc04

‘Partner.’341a3b9179013ba0

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‘What? Your partner’s kid?’7d98ceef40472087

Tennessee said nothing more to Camden, who didn’t understand.369809bade613082

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‘Didn’t get much sleep, huh?’929afc198474eb21

‘None of your business.’001a6bfbf73f0419

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Rather than sleep… maybe I’m truly exhausted,Tennessee thought.bf3d14bc7e481121

‘Watching you, I think you’ll die before me. Anyway, make sure you leave a will for your kid!’35a4066e21632b1f

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“Kid” … He did know one.1a56add79a31880c

At Camden’s words, Tennessee briefly thought of the kid.3649d7ab809d35af

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‘Clayton.’93569f79f9d80024

At the call ee0ec5b6bc urging him to d9b68fcffb follow orders, Tennessee 5abe16c6c3 came to his 93b2590f89 senses and moistened db4ce68be9 his dry lips 45e96f41a2 with his tongue.66681a68ca76015b

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This protection subject was e4508b011f similar to Amber in 43dd4920e8 age and build. It wasn’t that Tennessee ea0d60377d had a preferred type 00ccaf0583 to protect, but he b9c6988bab didn’t like kids of 044f7b05c6 this age. It reminded b9544a0458 him of 9f27816d96 his first 35d64b8df6 meeting with bc95b5608c Amber. They had nothing in c72f926948 common except for their 4a6a70b006 nationality. Ah, there was one e1306a210b more thing. When treated kindly, his c4a2ad6446 face would light up 2f81a98373 brightly. Whether it was b7b3a9810e unwrapping candy for b3951c1be5 him or doing 7e7c16241d small favors, he dd1e49b31b visibly appreciated it. That was also d00c69048d like Amber.72eb5d58e55684d0

Looking back, dc64a5cc9b Amber was 5603b281aa happy about b98ccae6d7 such trivial 46f267ba14 things.81a6d9d414ec3390

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‘Ready?’2077a02ab9227b0f

Tennessee checked the road signals. Even if he survived intact today, after today’s mission ends, tomorrow’s would come, and after that, another would follow.5ca69ffa8ca37e3c

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Suddenly, an uncontrollable fatigue ee0959a7ff swept over him.405f9b173d5ac896

And Tennessee blamed the e84fb5d7f9 innocent fatigue for the d8b45a4534 mission going wrong. Applying pressure to 79af257f46 his bleeding leg, 81c44ecb03 Tennessee wondered if 9daa51243a the haziness in 721aafe97f his head was 68abd94a6c due to losing 788e849834 too much blood, 29a8cc51ab fatigue, or lack f7256c3e50 of sleep.It could e28f1cce58 be all 0436d7c70c three, he thought.52df92442d15a613

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Gunshots rang out not 58f0ca27e5 too far away. They were gradually 9d57f32da6 getting closer.c58bb392a34899da

He had 74c795dbe5 lost too bd34fb544b much blood 8e58c9bbb8 and his 95b00d39ca mind was 87f15ece4b hazy. He leaned the back c3f6335f66 of his head against 02c989751d the cold wall. The gunshots bd32a1dba8 were similar a77841de98 to the b66b10ae76 sound of 1055ac1d5c fireworks. When he was young, 47c547d994 he was more familiar 86a414caaa with gunshots than fireworks, f3d595aec8 so every July 4th, d67d764d44 when fireworks were set b3eb2597ee off, he would curl 5e7b39a8f3 up in bed. It was as if 4b690e559d bullets had seeped in 0353143455 like shadows with those 2282bcfb64 firework sounds.af17740572922f47

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In fact, 380e436de3 the next 1968506cfd day, stories 3274aa5cfe would circulate 57ea62427f about some 8f774c0d7c gang member 9e191d778a or someone 003ba25005 in the e8c1b51a1a neighborhood dying.f80f1c8fc9a3fa51

Ah, I really can’t think straight.fe73e272e53c5941

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To gather his dim fa72e8a178 rationality, Tennessee wiped his b703264d40 forehead several times. HHe had to 8fada70596 live—it felt almost 7dc496386a like an obligatory ef0c368777 thought. Since he 67673a01bd couldn’t die, daa698f089 he had cd71292639 to live. There had to be e6039c7934 a way. It felt like fulfilling c711aec117 the bare minimum of 466ed90273 his responsibility to himself.accec84ab1017dc5

In front 3cde4890ef of him, 691bbc23c0 Camden lay 17a2b9df9e fallen with ff0aba73a3 empty eyes. Life had already a9a6bdc097 left those eyes, 8fc0411f70 leaving them hollow. After all his talk b405865708 about wills, he was 8c7dd90a95 the first to have 268f05ed5f the back of his 8591d14583 head blown off.d5bc335df9098b07

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Now the gunshots could be heard right in front of him. He had lost so much blood that he couldn’t even grip the gun in his hand.f6a5c5ea02d227f7

Is this how 4c33db95fb I die?c5833436de6ffb04

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So be it.a801c5483369bf83

Now that I think 4ecbe744a8 about it, it doesn’t cf5910c13e seem so bad.6ca66267eae641da

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Tennessee let out a long sigh. Every time he turned his head forward, he faced the piece of flesh that was once Camden. With his arms drooping, Tennessee closed his eyes. Camden’s words repeated.e5c901f48f0458e3

‘You have a kid, right? That’s why you’re doing this job.’9edfa700249fa1e5

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Bang!af328cae1eacadb9

The moment fireworks exploded 71fbfb52fc right behind the wall c30b998d05 he was leaning on,53dadbc91cb07bdc

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Tennessee suddenly realized.c1c790a058a2f3ee

He hadn’t told Amber he was going to leave him.31f373862bdb6f5c

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If he died somewhere away from home, or if he was unlucky enough not to survive, he thought he should definitely let Amber know, but he remembered that he hadn’t done so.57f5c9606b092157

It felt too 751e297773 empty to close ae24ecbfd5 his eyes like e05fc974ac this. There was still so ef79b8d32f much to do.64b70f4a3de39ca7

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He worried that Amber 713d7ba7c9 might never forget him 235bb6725f and spend a lifetime c7c90ac19a searching for him.c0cb40ecdcd82836

***782cc257b415886d

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“Why didn’t you reply?”50bf62c794d9004b

There was no other emotion in the questioning tone now. Amber asked calmly and waited for Tennessee’s answer.4686c0d5dcdda575

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“…I don’t know.”336be391e346e0c6

“Was it because of me? Did I make you uncomfortable?”8484d512f8b0d54d

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“A little.”44c43d963f9e2b5f

“Then you ran away. From me.”73356d7d3bb7f28c

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While reading the letter, and listening to Amber’s words today, Tennessee realized how deep and wide Amber’s resentment was. Tennessee didn’t make excuses either. He felt that this was all from seeds he had sown.d85d87d0ba76e40e

“Ever heard the word coward?”84eff9143b84ab39

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Tennessee smiled a5463eec21 and shook 4c616de160 his head. Amber smiled along. The upturned corners 6d98187143 of his mouth e82d099eaf were similar to 21a08ba89d before yet different.fbebd789afc79274

“I know it must have been confusing. I know it wasn’t easy to accept.”5ea0c95eaea6647d

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And Amber added.5005ba46a5873f6b

“But I think I’m going to make you even more uncomfortable from now on, Tennessee.”5e983df620ab001d

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As the hand stroking his head didn’t stop, Amber gradually fell asleep. It had been a tiring and hectic day for him. While touching the black hair, Tennessee couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.ea78f7a452145abe

Running away, huh…3bbc19e17f419daa

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He isn’t entirely wrong.eb97c4ac6e3c1405

“Happy birthday, adult Amber.”bdffb89084fcacfa

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Half-asleep, Amber curled his 9b4c75a519 lips into a smile. Though his face looked 6b000ed030 entirely different, Tennessee thought 42eb471d64 the way he smiled aa723fc96d resembled him in some b4aa6151ed way.98d5862af5d28107

“Thank you.”795b89974991a1e6

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Amber replied while falling 510fcf7144 asleep, keeping his anger a5c106fec1 and sadness carefully hidden. Amber had now learned 027fef1934 to speak in such 75a6c62698 a tone.0b92312cde34dd11

A suspicion crossed Tennessee’s mind that Amber might be a little glad he was injured.c422fab63fe38d74

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After all, while 4b8bcdc96a providing the troublesome 2570a08ab6 and demanding nursing 4e64de45c6 care, Amber seemed ba5e889442 genuinely happy. He never procrastinated, complained, 10f84d0ab5 or frowned. He was af4c2eeab2 always a 61e95b1454 step ahead, 3991ec007f offering help 3e56731011 and reaching 8e7a9bf24a out. Even for things Tennessee 066599c1c4 could do himself.8faa77060fddc88f

Tennessee was someone who was used to doing everything alone. It wasn’t different even when he was lying in the hospital. Two more surgeries were scheduled, so it would be a long journey until recovery. He had tried to adapt his body to prepare for this, but Amber didn’t give him the chance.88acf1d9e048b9d9

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I can do 33c2a892c2 it.b8bc6cc6fb7e1f47

Whenever he 3a0ae262e3 tried to 46c6def58c say those 5c4ead5e99 words to b7fb14838d Amber bringing 54ade411f0 him a bcf5f7e6d7 water bottle, a0649e40f8 Amber would e90637689d say countless 476b076ffe things with eecfd3d304 just his f928aec2a5 eyes. In that fbd73abeab gaze, he 5c26588397 seemed to d610d16cdc hear hallucinations 15fe6fa568 like‘Tennessee ran away from me, ran away… ran… 2 years… letter…’ So Tennessee couldn’t say anything.9337da90a353165b

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The doctor couldn’t find the exact cause of Tennessee’s prosopagnosia, only that it was likely due to the impact to his head during the car crash.fc8bdc3815c57a45

But Tennessee acted so naturally that Amber didn’t notice his prosopagnosia. Tennessee distinguished and remembered people in ways other than his faces. Intonation, accessories, unique hairstyles, habits, and such were his clues.4b9434b18e7f07c5

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Amber concluded that it was possible because Tennessee’s perception was incredibly sharp. There were identical twins among the medical staff, and Tennessee could distinguish between him too. When asked how, Tennessee answered, ‘Their walking styles are different.’ Amber couldn’t hide his amazement.7b1adf0af8f34a4d

After a few days, Tennessee could recognize Amber well too. Although it seemed he still couldn’t recognize faces, he didn’t give him a strange look even when Amber came in wearing different clothes.2d61685f29f7c2f2

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How do you 5120918f63 recognize me?b2ee91c09d9bf97a

When Amber asked, Tennessee just said, “I just do.” Amber playfully asked if he was refusing to tell, but for Tennessee, that was the best answer he could give. Tennessee just recognized Amber. Faces weren’t always necessary to recognize people. Tennessee was confident that even when he first opened his eyes in the hospital, if given time, he would have recognized Amber even without explanation.bd50452ed5df6dc0

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On the third day, Elizabeth and David visited. After being explained who they were, Tennessee greeted them, but Amber noticed that Tennessee couldn’t recognize their faces. While Elizabeth, who was a doctor, had a long and difficult conversation with the attending doctor after hearing about Tennessee’s condition, Tennessee sat quietly watching him. Beside him, David was crying, and Amber’s siblings, Cody and Annie, who had become middle school students by now, were absorbed in his smartphones, seemingly used to his father crying.00b41dfd564d1b6d

Tennessee left the comment that it was ‘quiet but chaotic,’ and Amber burst into laughter upon hearing that small mutter.fe351ca0de0c2c95

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“Ryker, why are you laughing?”c1c7a19d622dbc22

While David was wiping his tears, Amber’s siblings asked as he belatedly took out balloons. They were balloons with the message ‘Get well soon!’42642a2feadc273c

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Cody and Annie, Amber’s siblings, waited for Tennessee to say something first, but Tennessee only briefly said thank you.a317fa076762a80a

Although Cody 9b481ee18c and Annie bd679640b8 were generally eeece4315e outgoing and 48d23a79c4 sociable, they eec92a2f9f had an 709a586d77 awkward relationship 5644794a55 specifically with e7008983d4 Tennessee. This was 20371059cc partly because ac9ee9eb05 young Amber 5a6166b255 had desperately 56cbb63733 tried to 944ba4a9d5 interfere in 5bdb92eac8 his relationship, 7229d7d689 but also 62cb452ff5 because Tennessee 04228dc9bd was equally b532e635b1 indifferent to 8cc1ac5a93 all children.01e8ed6a48c73827

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Amber couldn’t help but laugh watching them staring blankly at each other. Then he recalled a memory from the past.689f63e856b619d7

Before going on 0d07d982fb a trip to 4f9e77c953 Florida, on the 38c3cabca1 day Tennessee visited 8aa9b160ee Michigan. Annie had gestured f54cbd7b9d to Tennessee to a899835424 pick her up. Amber, jealous without even c931facf5a knowing why he was d5d441e6e0 jealous, was about to d6d9ffa251 say no, but there 7cdae6a963 was no need.c060d06f1e3e6abc

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Tennessee didn’t pick Annie up. He just patted the small head with a gaze that was neither frightening nor cold. Although the rejected Annie grabbed Tennessee’s pants and cried, Tennessee only comforted her moderately without hugging her.0710e775ad47ccbf

Amber smiled with satisfaction. Tennessee was indifferent to everyone, but Amber didn’t mind that at all.aec2aeed866e84b3

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As Tennessee had guessed, Amber was making good use of this moment. Of course, Amber didn’t want Tennessee to be sick at all, but what could be done about it now that he was?199cca99fe9a6005

Above all, he 74516ec39d was happy to 4564610c8d have Tennessee all 202dd89ce9 to himself. Tennessee was 8f5e6ea8d2 always busy, 67f444ace2 and though 1ba46fcaab he occasionally 033e2dc190 made time 36fd422782 to be 80a1f06d14 with Amber, 040316e090 it didn’t 522ceb4cc4 happen frequently. They would spend weekends 928d2955eb together once every few af8979fe51 months.b6fc3bc9821b4341

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Now Tennessee 3f6d1947bc was severely 71105846c3 injured and b76f2261d5 it might 5388c28b40 take at bb22805df0 least six 90faa10300 months or 303aad99cf even longer 53723a8716 until his 882ee4c295 complete recovery, 64a22988e3 so it 17922463e5 became possible f658f6a4d9 for him 8a0e9d9134 to spend 38328de491 a long cf48c73ce8 time with ad2d18368d Tennessee for 3ce9d7f535 the first a557147655 time.a97c7f0a9d56160a

And surprisingly to Amber, Tennessee was quite an obedient patient. Following the doctor’s orders not to move his arm, Tennessee stopped trying to do things by himself. Now Tennessee entrusted almost everything to Amber. Sometimes he would just stare at Amber silently. Then Amber would hand over a water bottle or give his medicines in a small paper cup.f51deb5d3bd365ea

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Not only was he receiving help, but he was leaning on Amber. He didn’t want Tennessee to be injured, but this moment was sweet enough to make Amber feel guilty. He definitely wished for Tennessee’s quick recovery though, even if Tennessee would leave again as soon as he got better. Amber let this guilt flow to the very bottom.a9b1fc49e143e913

“Are you sleepy?”8b035db680528d5a

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Tennessee slept a ce8405d25d lot. He spent most of c043aba7ca the day sleeping.d39e8017024a9505

Amber quietly sat def3637e62 beside Tennessee, thinking 0613ed3dd3 it might be 1aa4b25d8f due to the 6671446d38 painkillers, but maybe c99ed8fbd9 he had been 7dc733c142 very tired all c2a1b6ac56 this time.34fd58f9422a9802

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“I wish you’d tell me how you’ve been all this time.”4f6ef9054400b84a

Focus returned to Tennessee’s eyes as he drowsily moved his eyelids.ee268777a178d4cc

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“It wasn’t much different from America.”89da7d6086e8cebf

Tennessee’s voice, drunk with sleepiness, was very low. Amber nodded while resting his chin on his hand.cf238fa815e22be1

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“Tennessee.”c1640ea470a8c147

“Yeah?”08e5515b4f236187

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“When you get better, are you thinking of leaving me again?”8467ce9ce45fd58d

Blue eyes met his. Tennessee couldn’t answer easily. He hadn’t told Amber, but Amber was Tennessee’s legal heir. The company kept his notarized will. That’s why Amber was contacted following procedure when Tennessee was severely injured.d6280049f4d27db6

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Tennessee hadn’t expected this reunion. It had been a comfortable and natural meeting, but one he hadn’t prepared for.0108ef5b2fc5dd67

“You don’t have to.”788674d3460d49b0

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Tennessee thought that the 8cb8484e45 original Amber would have 9217051e64 begged him not to. When Tennessee 33bfa7c33d first met 5cdc856191 Amber, he 7f00c4eed3 was eleven dae2ad5252 years old. Much time had d55572d098 passed since then, f4085ed8c1 but it had f06fefc505 never felt this 733f11760b unfamiliar. Tennessee was 85085c7b26 confused and 8663714ca9 couldn’t adapt. He felt f88966ec72 the changes 85ca9a51a8 with every f7659a2738 moment they 55004159c1 spent together.d8373c1319e2b2ff

Amber no 069a515482 longer begged 5641d4d8ca him. Though his tone 10115fa272 might sound like 3958c9fb39 pleading, the message 92dba68d2e contained in his ac287d1b59 persuasive words was cdeeab3621 different.35d6bbb2041f3077

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“Were you fine all those 2 years without me?”d7c7f219805984e3

Just as Amber 46e30aab71 had gone through 28a3c00432 many changes during 8c900e03c3 those 2 years, ca34de6dbd many things had e1eac55a53 happened to Tennessee 20e3ac0893 too. During those 2 years, 9013984977 the days Tennessee had 74cc1e5e6c proper sleep could be cb5963b4f7 counted on one hand. He was used 5c044c2eb0 to his chronic b9c9143116 insomnia, but there 20e98c18b7 were moments that f1f47c7f9e suddenly came to 1dbb7dc9a4 mind, like the 9d37f89012 young Amber who e204fa4246 used to desperately 1a3ceae467 interlock his fingers cc3c2c7c85 with his when cc12d9116a he opened his ba7e6e7d43 eyes.59d17c82df49a022

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Loving a young Amber d9c966f075 was out of the 5b65099d6b question, and Tennessee’s feelings a69532a854 on that remained firm. But now, the adult 3aac2fdc85 Amber was smiling at 0d2581fdbc him, asking how the c1ccf6fa50 time without him had 719017640f been. His cynical 6411765c3e remarks were 9c4306faff the same, e9df9c2b14 but they 1367ac79b5 came from 9a03166e75 a changed d584723223 Amber, one 48d20d885f whose heart d62b9b7e20 would never 6757ecedd6 waver.784581e017a75c94

“Sleep, Tennessee.”e31dd8bad1b8c639

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At those 0db1503260 words, Tennessee fe594b299b fell into cfa450fe09 a deep 6711c5c442 sleep as 04a7c5cebe if by f4432fcf6e magic.21f87360774cde81

As if making 0f39aabdbd the two years 073d7f649d meaningless.6ea707d47417fa1b

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***60abae0859d351fd

Tennessee’s first surgery ended successfully. Originally, he should have stayed in the ICU for 24 hours, but due to his good progress, he was moved to a general ward after 12 hours.70c6d24fa2e067d5

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When he was moved a2565c212b back to his original 4eda20539e room, Tennessee was asleep. Amber held eb2591fb0a his cold, c7bc265dba stiff hand 39fbe553a7 by his 83f821547d side. Tennessee woke 627a9212ce up a 504fe6d227 few hours fcdc35b6b6 later.18fb3180fe5656a2

Rather than being completely 8e13c50b3a conscious, it was more a3e9c818cd like briefly waking up. Tennessee stared at Amber 1f997580e1 by his side for d3f3442a29 a long while and 9ef283e4ee blinked several times. It took some 84140ad9fd time for him 5f5e79f690 to recognize that bd4398fc0e it was Amber.30b77fd3fb39a387

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“If you’re sleepy, sleep some more.”db209d0442f41379

Tennessee shook his head.632ed96938074e07

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“I’m sleepy, but it’s weird.”23c6a3c79f621fb3

“It’s the painkillers.”4de2b5ac03f2da71

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Although his 47c487eb3b words were 575e16fa4e meant to 053a7876ff be reassuring, a9da38edfa Tennessee raised d9025b5041 his head.aaad31afbcf3466b

“…Is it morphine?”53eb585ff7395f35

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Tennessee looked at his 5d700c069a IV needle and held dcf38a9908 his head. It was the 8882880ad4 first time Tennessee df7f2b0ff2 had felt this cdf1bbe192 dizzy.45823cbb10473449

“Yes, it’s a morphine drip.”989b36fa97280929

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“…Take it out.”caf003eaeed5be0c

Since it hadn’t been long since he came out of surgery, it would definitely hurt without painkillers. Amber shook his head, but Tennessee was firm.db551b471a2d99eb

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“Take it out, I don’t want it.”9f82413cf7f6c5a5

However, he couldn’t just remove the IV needle at will. Amber looked at the drip and first adjusted the roller clamp.2f80f47c83f82bc3

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“Tell him I want different painkillers, not morphine.”305e0576d7ae234e

“…Is it because it’s opium?”42a63687d37e91f9

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Although it was extracted from opium, morphine was a painkiller. It wasn’t a synthesized organic compound like ecstasy.94a6294f9de8b88b

“No, because my head hurts.”8cc0528df7efba91

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But Amber detected Tennessee’s deep aversion and rejection towards drugs. Tennessee sighed.d252c3c0dc23d187

Tennessee wasn’t that rigid about everything. He knew well enough that this was morphine prescribed by doctors in the hospital. But things invented for convenience were consistently misused. Xanax, diazepam, zolpidem… the list was endless.25bad4b56a93ca9e

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His mother had done drugs that way too. From marijuana to cocaine, heroin, and even long Xanax bars. It wasn’t just paranoia. Tennessee himself often wondered if he might be inherently vulnerable to addiction.3403bdba63e8e6cc

“But you’ll be in pain.”1b7705be91a48d38

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The pain d75b534dd1 was better.e8055305f03638c1

Tennessee was afraid. As far as 54aea71b7e he knew, bad 0bf4a145f6 things were inherited. Disease, poverty, and a539c87bd6 addiction. When he saw his ec74cf0b95 eyes clouded by drugs, 7156bbd24e he would fall into a6165657f3 hallucinations of standing in 2f04768947 his place, looking in b547179221 the mirror.8acd79e30a59d2fc

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“I’ll go call the doctor.”4e65257918412245

After confirming that no fb993c0b02 more morphine was dripping, 4bef2085e5 Amber got up.40f1a42a2681fd87

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“Stay with me, Amber.”41467d956286188e

Bound by that small request, Amber couldn’t move. Though it was a simple call, it had resonance. Small words flowed from Tennessee’s mouth as he covered his eyes with the back of his hand.f34ac355653c9451

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“Then I’ll be able to sleep even if it hurts.”f842c048018bb410

Amber sometimes had hallucinations 9fc32596f5 of being caught in a607b76187 a storm. It happened especially when 583c0686ff he was with Tennessee. At Tennessee’s words, his 0df64aa195 face flushed red, and aee7a5a806 he sweated under the 4742fd0ad8 scorching sun, sometimes shrinking 55bfd8dd06 from the gusts.33df641c5b21eb80

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If Tennessee knew de05f8f6d5 about these burning ecbb65bc6e feelings, would he 1b48bdd526 run away again?338b6eef07167882

Amber closed 1e7fba8429 his eyes c5e8280db8 and thought.7931fec8a1789c2b

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After hearing the doctor’s advice, Tennessee’s “I’ll do it myself” disappeared. No matter what anyone said, Tennessee tended to listen well to the doctor’s advice. Both Tennessee and Amber recognized the severity of the situation when told that he needed more rest, especially since it hadn’t been long since the surgery.684db8ef6e22a7e8

But Tennessee felt restless, and although he didn’t show it, Amber noticed. It was understandable. Tennessee’s daily routine consisted only of sleep, meals, and washing up. It became more apparent as the time he spent awake grew longer.1e881d7a4bc2b706

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After getting the okay c303893fdc for short walks, Amber 33aa3d1bc8 brought a wheelchair. Though it c0f7d0dcba wasn’t easy 05e19beb8e due to cfb7a31603 his broken 911de0b7dc limbs, Tennessee 9d29a6a5e8 managed to 90eaa8a3f0 get into f1fc2eb5ad the wheelchair.941b3f3fb2f67be8

After going 26f13917f4 around the cb96a6bc79 ward once, 43e6d09947 Amber was b9bc3e51e7 in the 0fe032114d process of faaf3f041c putting away e28e0e135e the wheelchair.b13cccdf3281de91

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Someone knocked on fdf0566334 the hospital room 5b16b18e49 door.598d3e41d6df5066

There stood a2b4511b10 men who afb0349a45 were similar a9f1e112a8 in build 4b9bf73b75 to Amber 5887540de9 but much d84ccaf00e more similar 2bb0a457c9 in demeanor d056edc160 to Tennessee. They were 897c4a491a all wearing 64fd70b00c suits. As Amber tensed and d09194c85a tried to press the 0f744aaecd call button, Tennessee shook b3386f28a4 his head.6e51400bab32f6fc

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“How are you feeling?”1a80e2dde1d1f3ab

It was a posh accent. The man who noticed Amber’s slightly furrowed brow made a polite but clear request for him to leave. He was very polite with his words, but it was essentially an order. The other two men in suits seemed to be bodyguards. Since Tennessee and these men appeared to know each other, Amber started to get up.a0fe39159edce8a8

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“Stay here.”888a057ab9f177fb

It had been a while since he heard ‘stay here.’ These men didn’t seem to mind much if Amber stayed, so he said nothing more. And not long after, someone else appeared. To Amber’s eyes, ‘appeared’ was exactly the right word.4fa337fd6677c600

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It was a 08a86f60b3 blonde boy who 2b4acdb0d8 looked to be b9f713ab18 in the higher c07c3b8b81 grades of elementary 62a75899ad school.a502988fd5dee8fd

…He’s not his son, right? He’s blonde though. While thinking this person didn’t seem like someone who would visit Tennessee’s hospital room, the same British accent as the earlier man flowed out. The boy calmly expressed his gratitude and mentioned sacrifice and hard work.2f9f6ad75cc70e2b

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Amber felt an explosion of jealousy that hadn’t been triggered since ‘that woman’ in Chicago. As he continued listening, the missing pieces of the story came together. Amber made a small ‘ah’ sound. Tennessee had been protecting this British boy.c30c7f49e57e28bf

“I’m glad you’re safe.”d1f68baa6fb03111

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Tennessee said that quietly, and Amber smiled to hide his doubled jealousy at the completed puzzle pieces. Tennessee had thrown himself in harm’s way to protect this child from those trying to kidnap him for ransom.321a9da661235b3d

It was just work, 4b8ca2ad3c right?bdb3f9f9a09a6021

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Amber consoled himself this way, but the young boy – vulnerable, honest – somehow reminded him of his younger self, and Amber hated that fact terribly. Tennessee was already hard enough to win over as it was.8fd2869f2cf6a94d

Maybe it was because Tennessee was such a dry person, but Amber seriously worried that he had a power to attract similarly dry people. If not for that, how could this noble boy come here and elaborate on how ‘we’ll cover the hospital expenses so don’t worry and please focus on recovering, thank you so much’?b86112bb73df3b40

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With his expression ab5278d057 controlled but feeling 7ad1f9f081 quite sulky inside, 94c6856dcb Amber crossed his 1cb4a9dcb7 arms.29a50afb8522dc96

The boy wiped his tears and reached toward Tennessee’s hand on the bed. He seemed to want to hold it.2c5e0be03858e3f7

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Just as Amber was 225b7ff4f9 about to wonder if 734644611d he needed to be 6f035d9120 jealous even of a 1176f122ea child, as the boy 6e96638d48 reached out, Tennessee naturally 3c9cb3c014 moved his own hand bfc48263da toward Amber.7dd3c97d82d2cc31

Tennessee’s left arm, which wasn’t in a cast, pointed to the water bottle. As if not even seeing the boy’s hand that had lost its destination.dabf7cffe3601eeb

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“I’ll contact you again.”e7bf462d079f0c6a

“I plan to rest until I recover.”93ee4868afa6c1ec

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“Mr. Clayton, after you recover-”f87cb82b5bd99cf6

“Even if the surgery is successful, I won’t be the same as before the accident. I’m not sure if I’ll be a useful head of security.”1f6641a50d9ec744

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Well done, Tennessee!d72d7296ebc6c9b7

Amber, who was about 5092b6b42a to hand over the 033082a3cc water bottle, changed his 690ae8fd4e mind. Instead of 6af7f20444 putting it d9de2d56bf in his a10b12b68d hand, he 02d77db41c opened the a3bfd44583 cap and 503a00ab52 held it 6d46d4164c to his 344ea52687 lips. Though he expected him 0b11fbbe65 to say something, Tennessee 7a2cfad407 quietly drank the water.c6f76af21979ee47

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Beautiful. Perfect. I love him so much, I feel like I’m going to go crazy.6cf222a74c9ee43a

Amber learned that a7ffc5ff2e when your heart ac9f417a7c beats too fast, 002422733e the pulsing can 6a963aa3ac travel all the e89f70eba1 way to your fb14ada50b feet.b10b6533047ee3cb

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Amber was busy.6cbd6bc7aa77b338

To Tennessee, it seemed like he didn’t need to be so actively diligent, but Amber moved without a moment’s rest. With someone of such large build moving back and forth in a single room, it somehow made the hospital room feel packed. Because his face felt unfamiliar, Tennessee rubbed his eyelids and opened his eyes.65dc41e5945c6670

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Although his voice had become much lower and thicker, it was possible to recognize it because traces of Amber’s distinctive voice from the past remained. As for the height, since he’d said he would grow a lot, it wasn’t that surprising. But who knew not being able to recognize a face could make someone seem so different.44bd5f896f302aeb

Every time he saw  75fd03d532 him, Tennessee felt like dca7af22a1 he was meeting a 36a11c28c4 stranger.8788af527e749207

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Especially when 369e666d01 he first f70f06f873 opened his 804962683e eyes. Tennessee recalled 414065e550 that moment 0b9e055b72 with a 372368ed50 bitter laugh.c925f53c4b89ea3f

A man with an incredulous face was looking at him, and Tennessee instinctively moved his hand to search for his gun. But the feel of the bed sheets was different and – of course – there was no revolver. His first thought was how to subdue this man.fe6c834e9bffe210

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‘Amber. I’m Amber.’c245744f0258001e

His foggy 021c3f6853 head seemed 4b44073133 to clear.Amber…? You?ca0ff6eec1eab10f

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Although the 2ab0219131 face was e9338f6882 clearly different aecb216d01 from the 2dbd79e334 one he 655b749d13 knew, he 209911b2e3 felt relieved. But prosopagnosia made one ec7392da3e somewhat tired. It makes you 94df86cc34 stay vigilant and 3ec615170b tense every time.6d4ccb44cb289a45

While he could recognize Amber now, the first few days were difficult, and honestly, he still hadn’t adjusted to his current face. It felt new and like a different person every time. Except for the scar, nothing remained as Tennessee remembered. To the point where he wondered if he was being deceived.5fc6512eb842e61b

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Tennessee shook 7df9719fdf his head a6f4f7679c at thoughts f424ccb47c that even 135c3dfd52 he felt 7a0e00c638 were foolish 2c52d33813 and inefficient.Who would go 248f97934c to such effort 466eb28695 and expense to 2a1dabfb04 deceive me? What am fbfe3bd92e I worth?And if someone really 51e28e5f0a wanted to deceive him, 36b4e7f284 there must have been c4675b7305 many people who could 85bc26e3e3 act similar to how 6967cdfd18 Amber used to be, 059faec015 but now he was b86714fcf7 too convincingly different.c9f87333ad1d101a

“Amber, my cigarettes.”6b9eacdddb4ea5c7

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Amber, who was organizing the drawer, took out cigarettes from his coat pocket. They were Tennessee’s cigarettes. Amber took out one cigarette from the pack and brought it to his lips. As he tried to take it with his lips, Amber pulled his hand back. When Tennessee, frowning, raised his chin again, the hand holding the cigarette moved away again.9aa7554285ad0142

“This is a non-smoking area.”48224b04ab891858

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“We can go outside.”1f322485eee8e082

“I’ll bring the wheelchair.”dcb5b7b7c26773f5

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Amber, smiling gently, bea2cdc753 seemed to turn 578b2aefa1 around but then 5d8ca6d0ac said this.74af498c27d699e8

“Oh, right, you’re not allowed to go out. The doctor said not to go outside because it’s bad for your immune system.”7fbb662c38e3652b

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Tennessee sighed. He had another surgery 5b14cbe223 ahead of him, and 1b8b6ae87d since no doctor in 3bec38a624 the 21st century would 3b17825129 recommend smoking, the smoking 22ddfcbcc3 ban was inevitable. In front of the 2e072d9ffe resigned Tennessee, Amber smiled d81e43a515 playfully and held the 1ddf7044f3 cigarette. Then he snapped the b0360ad4d6 cigarette in half right abef27d8ff in front of his bc31b3b0be eyes. The tobacco 39693b7085 fell apart.444eb575d1a56fda

Did he have 19b1cdd6cf this much resentment 6736ec9cb8 toward me, or c19f1e89f1 does he want 2716bc02fa to pick a 2c9f756008 fight with me 3c8903fb73 now?cafbb76947a3ba71

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While the nicotine-craving patient was pondering this, Amber’s face showed clear satisfaction for anyone to see.6899f263f7dec6c8

“Have this instead.”659de3398743c480

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Then Amber rummaged through c9f8faaa34 his pocket and took 8d2620f4df something out. Tennessee picked 47000d24d5 up the 1aea963903 things that 9ed68d7464 fell in 073e2aa794 front of 1a74990ba6 him with a5b823ebf7 a rustling ace3412822 sound.c2fc8b363f25a7fc

Tootsie roll.7a2510dcdc42d294

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It was dark brown 40189b9eab taffy candy.d783b4381a4d4cfb

“I bought these on purpose. The color looks just like it might match your ruined alveoli from smoking too much.”481a8c7f54c810af

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It really is e73b7e5998 him.993dddfe288ad4a2

With his functioning left 766f39bcd4 hand, Tennessee swatted away 61afbf0a1a the candies.a380156de533af66

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With all 6cdbb593ad the nursing, 3df0cbabe8 Amber had 214aff5d6c been getting 6bfde9c8c6 tired and 2f47190f14 falling asleep 9e7696d5a1 more often 643376a333 lately. Tennessee clicked his tongue. It was bd0e4a6248 only natural, 233ae9aab1 with how aa105394ab busy he b52b5d48c5 was taking 0bfc7de32b care of ebd2a041a3 him, doing f5d48f6181 everything else 3426b4a18e too.eaab62bf1d595278

Amber tried to handle d922655ade various paperwork as well. Tennessee needed to deal 52602144d0 with hospital documents, bills 2411010b3f and emails, and even 46a1d3a8a7 real estate matters, and aaf5436f98 Amber pestered him saying 691e19b96d he wanted to help. He became even more 2e18223521 insistent after learning that f1e17e1c94 Tennessee was planning to 1ab54e681e buy a house in c3d92ffed9 Chicago.346717c1ed27bd50

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Tennessee had decided to 6bb1da0c60 settle in Chicago right d675eb2fee after hearing from the 1d1b4e03c5 doctor about his recovery 7c5b7bd815 progress.08fd081eedf512ad

‘When you have brain surgery, the brain swells. It takes at least 6 months for the brain swelling to go down. That’s the minimum. It can take up to a year.’d4f87a407a8daa21

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Instead of security work, he’d have to do office work as a security consultant like before. Or maybe just resting wouldn’t be bad either, the thought crossed Tennessee’s mind. A year would pass quickly enough. Since it wouldn’t be financially difficult, it wasn’t an unreasonable thought.401f36c17398aa48

‘And it takes a long time for bones to heal too. While the discharge won’t take long, complete recovery will.’f453832c4549e46a

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So of course Amber enthusiastically welcomed Tennessee’s plan to settle in Chicago for the time being. Though it was a strange mix of anger and welcome.9df674ad447b698c

‘Where are you going to go?’206368ca46a939d1

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‘Probably Chicago.’7dde1a0fd2551d6a

He hadn’t fully 3710b326f3 decided to take bf5a11beae a break, but ccfce628b0 if he did 5cb40ee5e9 work, Chicago, where 2a802277c3 the security company’s 100f077c1f headquarters were, would 5b586b1f09 be best.bedb3e2b700b503e

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‘That house, Tennessee. It has to be that old house.’950f9e820377e0f7

‘…’161747c8aefb94ff

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To Tennessee, Amber f02653a3ee seemed to have 4f65e64311 deep regret about 40d8af7d34 that house being 4603c4a36c sold.a6e7253129bc1b95

According to Amber, what Tennessee sold wasn’t just a house, but the memories that came with it.10e0f0606c4eae0e

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Selling memories, he says…Tennessee sometimes thought d3155a3eb5 about that house 7be3acdf38 too. Not just c9708df365 that house e805e1b10f specifically, but 27e4c6f43c all the 2370621008 spaces that 6e563ce74f held memories a072b34971 with Amber, c25498791a like fingerprints.2b7da1dd933ec559

Back when bc003a8d25 he lived 06c7a46ca9 in the 0b300919e2 studio apartment 44f8f09871 in Chicago. Amber would press his 382d38b88b face close to the aaa7d61ea0 window to see the 3f3fd8a2df night view. When his nose touched 91b507d0d3 the cold surface, his 7c17cfe28b breath would fog up 8acb4119ba the glass. City lights. With both 43202f80d7 hands against 646ed6c711 the window, 96458e9f3f Amber would 0d929069df stare outside 571b3722e9 for a 1b5ace5e0c long time. Even after he stopped bb65a25cc9 being amazed by the d130c07c84 night view, Amber would c51490428a still press his nose 927a9fe289 against the window and bd65b0cac0 look outside.45a639d2679ea29a

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That’s what you call memories, apparently.So Tennessee ef0dbb2ff5 finally decided 1d97e776a3 on that 81836d451b house from 0bd04aa6d7 back then. Fortunately, it was ee3ec3ac41 possible.4b45c3fd1466c6fe

“Amber.”192085455ff4c72a

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He called out as a test, but Amber didn’t wake up. Maybe fatigue from the past few days had accumulated. Not wanting to wake him, Tennessee pulled the wheelchair beside him. Thankfully his left hand was fine. If he couldn’t move his left hand either, wouldn’t his lifespan have been shortened just from frustration?938ac25f2b029972

“Whew…”0750970f4c351c06

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Tennessee had to break a sweat just to get into the wheelchair by himself. His legs weren’t comfortable, and it was hard having to support his entire body with just his left hand. The fortunate thing was that Amber had locked the wheelchair’s wheels. If not for that, he wouldn’t have succeeded due to the wheelchair rolling around.85e9b8d0aef22c07

After managing to 23cf4955e3 get into the 0f8b5cdf90 wheelchair through various d708cc1b77 struggles, Tennessee wiped e560a9f0f3 his forehead, which 91758c7e65 was now drenched a1c412b43f in sweat.a787fd275cc42100

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Getting into the wheelchair 1e5e4ff2fc was difficult, but everything 54120ee772 else went smoothly. Seeing Tennessee 6aff6f9f3c coming, people 1d2bc0bbc1 held the eee6c53914 elevator door b89e3077d7 open for edacf91218 a long 49f3032d05 time waiting 16ab6d6799 for him. Though he gestured for 091f67d861 them to go ahead 677e5c84ab saying it was fine, a77b07ea59 a middle-aged woman even c7a1572ef4 pushed him, perhaps feeling 58edbdcbaf sorry seeing him moving 2d54e19985 with just one hand.59d8736517301360

“How did you get hurt?”1c0c16d2c72f47ee

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Tennessee didn’t answer as he found it bothersome, but the woman started making up his own story, saying ‘Poor thing, must have been in an accident.’5b0b4d731bb3ee07

“My son Jeremy also had a traffic accident…”a0127fc0bc7ebd5a

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Since it wasn’t particularly unpleasant to hear, Tennessee just nodded vaguely. He received other small helps too, and Tennessee didn’t refuse them. He thought it was okay to accept as long as it wasn’t a big favor.ccc1dc6759479b66

And when Tennessee returned 7130c7f844 to the hospital room, d019c97c6a the door was wide 8a39fd6e2b open. Tennessee stiffened a171877f95 and assessed b5fc328e01 the atmosphere.ed148f08962c510e

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Amber was sitting alone. He must have woken up quite a while ago as there was no trace of sleepiness. Tennessee pushed the wheelchair with difficulty using one hand, and because the sound was quiet, Amber didn’t notice him right away.2b0d5ab9a73e4ae9

As he entered, adda8c6abb Tennessee saw Amber 9b804b4968 wearing what seemed 9c44880e38 like a stiff 19886377a8 mask. It was fc19e9d679 the first d875fa0e55 time he’d 8be19a2068 seen such 7008519a8f an expressionless 28ec28e355 face on d99626068c Amber. It was as if 7d51f5d8e0 his expression had been 8337a0b20a wiped clean, blank like 0083e4ee24 a white canvas. You could 34abaf30a9 draw anything 7101b05734 on it. He wouldn’t 46c6deb06b have been 481b20ed72 surprised if f939ead104 anger lurked 69b85eb579 behind that 31edb9c3cc blankness.707f17cb457dee44

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“What are you doing?”044e33b806acdd53

“Tennessee?”bf46b89e57b05cc6

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Amber jumped up. It was a bright 2f3d745552 face contrasting with the 66e5225882 earlier expressionlessness, as if ce6cbe15e4 it had been an 9a7b84790d illusion.1a079c476fb5475e

“Where did you go?”59569d99b056bacf

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Tennessee furrowed 2295b6f976 his brows ac2de02cdc at the b0abb1a7b0 expression that 2983812a3c changed as 23bd137945 soon as 3804fd0126 Amber discovered ca1c9da5c5 him.afb8dbf6b3e16a56

“A walk. What’s wrong?”7cc88f112d8063d6

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No, just,cabd8eb88ba26d02

“I thought you ran away.”cd107ded647a2de9

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The tone was full a910533c99 of playfulness, but there aed3a33124 was a weight in 586e137cab that message.fdc0fe6eadf5534f

“Why would I run away?”b3ac68462145a849

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“Right, of course.”da991bfd09145291

Amber, who 5d88cdadaa seemed to 1456ef119a be thinking 7c0dbcf53b deeply, agreed 14038a9242 with a aaea83487e look of 888029287f understanding.32bf7d92a717fe53

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“You have surgery this week, how could you leave?”c0627ce1c999358e

“…”6be8c9c93adc6376

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Amber had become more cynical in the time he hadn’t seen each other.0ca25ab1047525ef

And Amber marveled at how he got into the wheelchair alone. Before Tennessee could say anything, Amber quickly locked the wheelchair and bent down close. It meant for Tennessee to put his arm around Amber’s neck. The routine was that if Tennessee wrapped one arm around Amber’s neck and hung on, Amber would help lift him to sit on the wheelchair, otherwise Amber would have to completely lift him up.ec899866a8893b14

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Though it was contact he just couldn’t get used to, it was better than being carried like a princess. Hiding his uncomfortable feelings, Tennessee wrapped his arm around.1142b5fc18a6213a

“Was the walk nice?”27d3f778333e9d3a

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Their upper bodies were pressed close and ticklish breath touched his neck and shoulder. Amber put his arm around Tennessee’s waist. The arm crossing his back felt unfamiliar. The old Amber used to be small enough that he could have dangled from Tennessee.b9f362835e177d36

“Yeah.”c6f646fadeb85260

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“Let’s go together next time.”44bf6693292b7c01

Amber suggested 5530a61f7f while helping d062ee9130 Tennessee get 2f5fb94ea1 onto the f1907d7baf bed effortlessly.68cd09a7d65d7136

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“Let’s eat ice cream together.”48b6c278b9a17ee8

Tennessee nodded at Amber’s words.5c1bd5905d691527

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“You said ice cream.”81532da3af8eeab1

Doritos, Lays, Butterfinger, 6bfbfcc1cd BabyRuth, 3 Musketeers. These were b8a1197f33 all the 1eddb64a43 snacks Amber 7529237827 was holding 1573fe62d5 in one 89d7111ea9 hand.8fcd53d6da886273

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Considering that the place Amber visits most frequently these days is none other than the vending machine, it’s not really surprising. On his other hand were a Mountain Dew and a root beer.ee3050c5f3c39735

Tennessee made a nauseated face seeing all the things tumbling out. Amber’s tendency as a faithful Mountain Dew enthusiast seemed to have now extended to root beer and Dr Pepper. Of course, Tennessee didn’t like any of the three.4643ba757af987c0

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“Is this why you’re staying in the hospital?”9856dd73edeac278

Amber burst out laughing, but Tennessee’s question contained about 65% sincerity. It was certain that as Amber’s size had grown, he needed more fuel too. Amber would instantly devour all those greasy, sweet, and salty things from where he sat. He didn’t forget to suck his thumb tip and raise the corners of his mouth in satisfaction.51135c5cc43726a1

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“What about school?”5c7b5257609216cb

Tennessee brought up the question he’d been curious about for a week. Amber was probably attending university. But during these two weeks, Amber hadn’t left the hospital room except to get books to read or necessities like clothes. He had faithfully stayed by Tennessee’s side throughout.171164f5016d8b87

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“I told you, Tennessee, that I won’t tell you.”920df39b79624c93

Amber retorted that Tennessee should know how frustrating it is when your curiosity isn’t satisfied.72bfdb2421495e34

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This was his karma, so Tennessee didn’t ask further. He had other methods anyway. If he just dropped hints to Elizabeth or David, they would readily tell him what a proud son and upright young man Amber was.bf74551fe3f829bf

“By the way, Elizabeth and David won’t tell you either.”e027488920c2dff3

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Tennessee raised his eyebrows f912e61202 at the unexpected words.3b84df492fc642c6

“I warned them thoroughly.”103193cd4980d9ac

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“Are you being spiteful?”3865dbcc2a8c33a9

“No.”0832c4f4c1915344

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Amber shook 2a04f35285 his head c3cb976c80 saying that 316fc5c476 was absurd.18094abae804fde4

“We’ll exchange questions later.”8bff00d942a4802b

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Amber flatly refused with a bright face. Separate from regretfully refusing Tennessee, Amber’s heart was just filled with happiness. Even if he couldn’t promise what would happen in the future, each day being with Tennessee made his heart overflow.28e65c160154faec

“I thought the more time passed, the less curious I’d be…”c0269d34f073ed5a

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“I think I’ve told you a lot.”580411210ca58a9d

“Not enough.”0c449980a63d35c4

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Amber’s logic was that since Tennessee often kept his mouth shut, he had no choice but to use such underhanded methods.ba943e9fd474ae3f

“What are you so curious about?”6d156fc396d7eab1

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Amber said there would 3c291b3ecb be no end if 3249e35059 he started asking questions.d7b123e8a450ca2c

“So, let’s ask each other one by one. Until then, you can accumulate questions too, Tennessee.”e3d31b337022d05f

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Amber’s large hand 919ecf605a cautiously approached. It lightly touched 06e3ac8a9a the tip of 4af5044a6f Tennessee’s left hand. It felt eb2c0d83db like a 5fc1c000eb feather had afc1cbbc43 landed.cc64f30d168f0251

The smooth touch 7daa550938 of fingertips was 6e64765db6 unfamiliar, but it 2b2cc7b647 felt too sensitive 2810fd0294 to pull away. As Tennessee moved 4822390544 his fingers, he 98683cce6c eventually let go ae88c84d38 when someone approached 669f3e4c09 them.73341764cde322b4

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A man in scrubs cd92f741e9 and Crocs appeared, and 94e4250d64 Tennessee instinctively tensed but f3b709ecf2 soon sighed. He recognized the aca3e7e4f0 man by his 644a255715 voice and hand 186380a312 gestures. It was the 0a715e4c85 nurse who came 9f588eabe5 by occasionally.102b04910528a845

“Good morning, Ryker.”ebfc707ec6ddfe56

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“Good morning.”150c88b3e7b4fdb1

Amber naturally 8a0f16b1bc stepped aside, b2032d5ab5 saying he’d 050fc745a8 clean up d049bd8286 the snack c52d6bd20c trash. The nurse fd422ff083 checked the 21ba228a82 IV in 99e2b45374 Tennessee’s arm 9b7deb4a56 and asked 5fecc499d3 a few aad120fa39 questions.40e67a02ba5807af

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Tennessee couldn’t answer the questions right away as he was watching Amber’s back disappearing around the corner. The nurse laughed when Tennessee couldn’t concentrate at all. He smiled, knowing all too well.27e4ddfac3ee1134

“Your boyfriend is as handsome as ever.”94f3dd9e95d18600

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Tennessee’s mind lit up as he was about to answer.e48128a4799f349b

…Boyfriend?689cd679624bf3ee

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“All done.”3579cb5ed09bec57

Before Tennessee could grab him and explain, the nurse set down the medicine and paper cup. Then he disappeared with a look that seemed to say ‘what a lovely couple.’ Like passing a baton, Amber appeared from around the corner of the hallway.3f5c725e9658042e

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“Amber, how did you introduce yourself to that person?”d2a6c2371a8e2542

Tennessee’s interrogation began.f85b0e963f0e863a

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“Me? As Ryker.”50629fe9d5c2e26d

He was fca9363ae7 usually quick-witted, 137be41d2e and Ryker 04b0bfabe0 was also 8841114c2e good at 33d80eb7ec pretending to c24e4cab01 be oblivious.4391d1304a007204

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“He thinks you’re my boyfriend.”3a9860934ab7ce00

“Ah.”a471fd9e1d715e28

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Amber swallowed the words that probably most of the hospital thought the same. Amber avoided eye contact. Though Amber claimed he was innocent and upright, he couldn’t escape the allegations.770f68f7ed4fb0d5

“How did you introduce yourself?”908789f910b3cb8a

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“That word…. starting with P.”4a3e0345a70e3c9c

“Patr-”4699899b779fccd7

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“Partner.”a11b905542729eb2

“…Plus one, right.“¹bbe10211eec60cc7

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A scoff escaped Tennessee’s lips involuntarily. Not even as a business partner, but introducing himself as a partner while staying at the hospital constantly taking care of him was akin to coming out.4f1263570e0eab8a

“I didn’t mean it that way, but that’s how he seems to have taken it.”c949a373d861ae37

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Amber added regretfully.6bdd3f59f80862d5

He insisted c7db3a657d he truly e51d52a0b3 meant partner, 2dec40a3a3 but people 7d12dd3dc8 took it 684187f329 the wrong 102875d33e way.2000f144782d90a9

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“Shut up.”f53f8590f7cee8f8

“It really wasn’t my fault.”93b29ec5b7d746e7

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It didn’t work on Tennessee. He couldn’t shake the thought that Amber was gradually becoming more audacious.aa2162251f1954b3

“I’m sorry.”f4c45dcfe38d8a24

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Just as 913c73a0d4 an annoyed f239ec7d8b Tennessee was d3fd420023 about to 3caa749df7 speak, Amber 55de9bb4ed quickly apologized.2f5deaed8c1d4c64

“A few days ago, he asked what our relationship was since we don’t look like relatives. In that situation, I couldn’t tell him everything about our past, and I couldn’t find another word to replace it. And well…”7ebbfd98f6d87c53

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Amber smiled bitterly. The corners 090d7104e3 of his 51c0ef7760 mouth that b7b8c903c8 had tried 7174ce9d2d to rise 31bde40887 crumbled slightly.8a5b68ef9965bcf1

“I couldn’t say we’re nothing, because that’s not true. Are we really nothing?”ba99c4aed938aca6

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When asked ddc975905c like that, 4a0eebe417 Tennessee had 2983f9f5a0 nothing to 6f6e737338 say again.19d338cd70f7764d

“I’m sorry.”1e7133ca8fd46390

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Amber apologized again. Words of reproach 428490d97e rose to his b072545080 throat but barely ca7bd835f2 clung to Tennessee’s 6894f7d4fa tongue. After much struggle, 4eff62fe7a they finally went c997908967 back in. What could 9b6b5186f2 he do b115978c96 when Amber 0b188380f4 was sorry?526a02f31ffc6531

“Next time we meet, I’ll explain it.”836b2d3e1abac743

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“What are you going to say?”e7ab04a6d6cbe2b7

Amber went 6b86dbbda0 ‘hmm’ and 64d07172b0 then laughed e3a78d8aae softly.b533fc32080cc10b

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“I’m not sure, I’ll think about it.”31fab237945dbc38

Tennessee, who had been fb000e2d85 rubbing his temple, ended 3d2b9d8b97 up shaking his head.5cacc265da4eea4b

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“Forget it, it doesn’t matter anyway.”ff187ebd6fae9ebd

They were people 76ee9de7c1 he would soon ff3197b5c6 forget and never 0b38d02b6c see again, and 9a8ff8ff81 it would be 943c0f61fc ridiculous to go a4d4c01a20 around explaining to b2b323aeb3 each of them.b10aaccf22158fdd

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“You’re not angry, right?”fa5e1edd2c500904

“No.”064c44b251d463bf

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Tennessee couldn’t shake the feeling that he was somehow being led along by Amber.007272024944e8f7

Tennessee, who had become serious, naturally found himself contemplating Amber’s impudence. He had an intuition that Amber was becoming more and more cunning as the years went by.d90bd15cefc2c46e

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“Tennessee.”48d56fe846bf2889

Something approached 527e0ba228 Tennessee’s lips, 59102f69d2 lost in 4323b800d2 deep thought. It was 11fdceb4ae a pill.c98d4646cd8cb378

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The morphine e35f7443f7 Tennessee refused 9ada4c33d5 was highly 0d01bd355e addictive and 8786684e58 had side c5dfbe8056 effects, but 2996839271 it was d6849de1ed a very 3034d5e8a2 effective and 8a64d71f3d powerful painkiller. Along with d1a1eaa323 the surgery cb0f979a7b site, Tennessee 889dfa7c46 was in d7b32c0c02 severe pain e4fa919c16 from his dd95050286 injuries, so d2f10524b7 he was c47c485436 regularly taking a67e00f44f alternative painkillers.f5a856238a06198f

He reached out 3610b2ed7c with his good 2a2ace0bad left hand, but 3a471e0c99 Amber shook his 6339dffb26 head. As he was ddf6617a72 about to insist, c9018c2d82 a round, smooth ec5dcb22e2 pill touched his 5f9efb3709 lips. The pill carefully slipped 3a37483911 through his barely parted 2fd1d6969c lips.5da997be3cfdbc9a

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“Open wider.”2404a9f3fff142f4

Now, Tennessee’s lips 8a892d70b9 were only slightly e702e5de5e parted, enough for 59a2ba3435 a breath to 93c92f9c2e escape. When Tennessee reacted 38b99da3c9 indifferently, Amber’s thumb 4af81619fb touched his lower c0dbf8b8fa lip. The warm fingertip pressed 0089abbd05 against the swollen red 06493e0fc7 lower lip. Reluctantly, Tennessee relaxed his c2aff2c4f6 lips, and Amber smiled 7e1541244c contentedly.157949b6eb7e5b34

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He thought Amber would make him bite down on his finger, but instead, Amber’s finger passed the lower lip and slipped slightly into his moist mouth. It was a light entry, just enough for Amber’s fingertip to touch his teeth. If Amber’s thumb went in just a bit more, it would touch the tender flesh inside his mouth.cf70757bcdcfe315

While holding Tennessee’s mouth open like that, Amber pushed the pills in one by one. After putting all the pills in his mouth, he brought a cup of water too. As Tennessee drank, his eyes looked up. Whenever Tennessee looked at him, their eyes always met. Amber’s gaze was always on Tennessee.8b2e83bc2315a1be

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“Good boy.”70857c3c4936a855

Tennessee’s brow furrowed slightly at those words, which Amber noticed with uncanny perception.16dd07f129ec3c64

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“That’s me. I’m such a good boy, taking care of you like this.”1837b9cdd663b9e9

Good boy, Amber.3a31be42d23eb25e

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While praising himself loudly enough to be heard, Amber rested his forehead on Tennessee’s shoulder. Knowing Tennessee’s physical condition, it was a light touch like flower petals landing.2dd4c287a684ade7

Tennessee stroked Amber’s black hair. Not expecting it, Amber’s shoulders stiffened, but Tennessee nodded without noticing.3d84bce293197738

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Why hadn’t he stroked his hair more like this before? Amber’s hair was so soft it made him regret it, and it pleasantly disheveled under his palm.750c9569f911c36c

“Yeah. You’re a good boy, Amber.”eba7818ff72954ed

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His masculine strong and 4b31d8acdd dark eyebrows rise. Every time Amber 64a2e720dc blinked, his shadowed 661c096fd9 eyelashes seemed to 5dee6961ea flutter like butterfly 7ef3a97d6a wings. When this 9caaa19c24 handsome man 0d3b887955 who would 64b0773fa0 draw attention 2ecd8ae8ec anywhere smiled 4f2770399b softly, his 91f3e3b50b beauty shone d3cb001a32 even more.b191f176e047c5ce

“Thank you.”63fe1abecd81cb6e

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