MLCD Chapter 5.3

There are many times when the words ‘I love you’ are not welcome. When you’re sleepy, when you’re tired, when you’re broke. Above all, when he heard them from the same editor who sneers, mocks, and clicks his tongue at every action Shavonne takes.8f2b5a65edd13fc1

“I love you.”060237270adbd752

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Changing into 7dc7f9c24d loose clothes 34c79b3aa6 that reveal c7ffef4b3b bare skin 58dabb49b5 for no f758ba62fe reason, complimenting 094827341b him with af6b4770fa a “you 2df3fe443b have beautiful 821142e784 eyes,” insisting b4346982b2 on staying 4760f79902 over. It was 4b6926fb69 obvious what c28854ea96 all that a1dd06eae2 meant: I 6a8162c806 want to 2e9a81edb6 sleep with c03c825880 you.aed932d8afd7d93a

That’s why Shavonne was perplexed. While ‘I want to sleep with you’ was expected, ‘I love you’ was not. Love? How could sneering, mocking, and clicking one’s tongue be love?242510af8946a8a3

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“What’s your intention?”55510b596c42bb9c

“Does love need an intention?”e0c1b872cebbfd9a

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It does. Love without intention doesn’t exist. Love is about gaining something. Sometimes it’s material gain, sometimes emotional. Because it’s not lonely when together, because it’s comfortable, because it’s happy, all of these are gains too.ee924fff6a5d0e62

But did Turner say 898b4035fc ‘I love you’ to 1414b8349a Shavonne to avoid loneliness, 139a4f8072 to be comfortable, to 129ca7b1a1 be happy?43851d7c6c380104

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…That can’t be. He must have an ulterior motive.0c5b54623d2f0fda

A dim room, candles burning in brass candlesticks, sentimental music flowing from a gramophone… The house itself was like that. Turner had meticulously decorated the house, insisting that there must be a good atmosphere when drinking. Even when Shavonne said there was no need to go to such lengths if they were only going to have three drinks, Turner remained steadfast.aa2eee83e49bae10

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Perhaps I should have realized then that he had an ulterior motive. If I had, I wouldn’t have had to face such nonsense as “I love you.”7a95a3cf9a064a1d

“…I’m not quite sure about what you meant by that, but I’m absolutely not interested.”8da7ff46b644e902

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As he stood up, Shavonne staggered slightly, which was odd. Champagne didn’t have a high amount of alcohol. And Shavonne wasn’t weak enough to get drunk on three glasses of champagne. But now, after just a glass and a half, his head was buzzing. Even considering that his physical condition wasn’t good due to overwork, he was getting drunk way too fast.0840671a16289856

The thought 03f9f70e8c that Turner 10710acdf2 might have f85a7b6efc spiked the 41b741b7e9 drink belatedly 6af684b447 crossed his a18ee03603 mind.Has Turner drunk d173da93a7 anything? He couldn’t remember. Except for a sip or two of the absinthe in front of him, he didn’t seem to have drunk anything.0cb3c11983c616c9

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“Are you already drunk?”ff0f3ece497ee850

“No. I’m fine.”02f57e2067525daf

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Shavonne tried hard to steady himself. If there was any fortunate point, it was that Shavonne hadn’t gulped down the drinks quickly with the thought of ‘I’ll just quickly finish these three glasses and leave.’ Of course, it wasn’t because he thought something might have been spiked. It was because he thought he might be at a disadvantage if he got drunk.b568f632b0f318ef

‘You’re drunk, so you should sleep here.’ or ‘You’re drunk, so I should take you home.’ Both were terrible. He also didn’t want to go home completely drunk.296fe0baef7a7619

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“Let me answer first. I think you should stop with the love or whatever it is. We are coworkers. As soon as personal feelings get involved, our efficiency will decrease and…”6617e05dd40cb991

He continued without 7813577ad4 even taking a e4fdae6f4c breath.090025e2fa5935bd

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“I have never once thought of you as anything other than an editor.”1d76db89670b6938

There were exactly two exceptions. The first was when I considered you my only ‘fan’, and the second was when I thought you were a bastard who would work someone to death.7b266db6cad7da07

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Shavonne took the initiative, worried that Turner might persist with ‘Maybe you’ll think differently in the future?’ It was best to put an end to any potential arguments that may arise before they could be used against him.d99234b92b9f198d

“Of course, I intend to continue thinking that way in the future.”e7e925caf96ab2dc

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Turner had 8a80fbe3a1 no reaction. Shavonne thought fff7c8a44b that maybe a59a07ddb3 he was 155404b0ce shocked at 8fd8111725 being rejected 7bd578edcc by someone a12acd1640 like Shavonne. Whether it was 57699c8cf0 a shock that b1164ac350 would last five e28775f04e minutes or a 1d5caa4941 week, it was 3327592341 an opportunity to 5a7d1ddedc escape from this 732d2e819c place quickly.da77c2612ad151ae

A house so soundproof that not a single sound from the neighbors could be heard, closed windows, thick iron bars over them, strict security posts with a pair of armed guards, a 3 meter high wall… Everything was unbearable, but among them, this house was the most unbearable. Just seeing the nameplate made it hard to breathe. Like a prison.30a66a8ccba5c803

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He grabbed his 27529e93eb coat hanging on 6cab589883 the chair back 968078e3ef and quickly turned edf9f41e15 away.b6c8f56cb0324988

“I’ll go first. I hope we won’t see each other until the contest results are out…”1848fbc186a4c6e6

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“Impressive.”37883ce57aab16d3

Turner opened f682a6c50c his mouth.1caf71e87eb1bdda

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Shavonne stopped moving.560f2c0b929b02ad

“Someone might think you’re disabled. No, worse than disabled. Even a fucking eunuch would have given in by now.”c3adf596889d1e22

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Turner stood up. The tablecloth was 6c499cb08b pulled. The glass at e8508ebc56 the edge of 186907571e the table fell 102ecceb46 to the floor 9f7ed8e5f1 and shattered. The broken glass pieces 7292565f0d sparkled finely in the d76f256f2e faint candlelight. Shavonne took a 137adb177a step back, startled.22d8ad4e32af39a7

“I don’t understand why you’re so evasive.”d5940dd1f1b18678

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“I don’t know what you’re talking about, but you’re being…”73fd877f46cf1d8f

“I know too. I know that you’ll give it up to anyone as long as they have a pretty face. Were you really putting on an act because you thought I didn’t know that?”f3515775f876f125

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Thud. His back hit the wall. Shavonne stopped. Turner stopped too. Turner’s gaze traveled up and down Shavonne’s body. It swept over his neck, shoulders, collarbone, stomach, and waist. A smirk appeared on Turner’s lips.e0da2cd2a2c6cc71

“I’m good at it.”4478b0dbf92eb61d

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When had it 515ef1d81c started? Since when 78ea16f122 had Turner 723517a794 been perceiving f157b711d7 Shavonne as d3f5d66967 someone who 5d6d57af3c would ‘give 34a83a9fb1 it up f56b2a24aa to anyone 1e8c7254a9 as long 1c559ca420 as they b33d95ae2c have a 0fe9a57100 pretty face’?1f1434689ff7f04a

— Why don’t you eat, sleep, and work here for a while?0a7ab47b5cd38dbc

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Since then?9869688d15a65b86

— You have b1b58dc9f5 beautiful eyes.fac8970a922b18c5

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Since then?1bec9267e33cdbd9

— I’m a fan.d9bce6bd4db9a776

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Or since then?fca6b56eff68a661

His Adam’s apple bobbed involuntarily. Shavonne pretended to lower his gaze while glancing around. The closed window and the iron bars beyond it, the side table by the window, and the flickering candle on it briefly caught Shavonne’s eye before disappearing. Window, iron bars, side table, candle… each image swirled in his mind, mixing together.bd34c46c92eb4b15

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“Haven’t you been pent up all this time because you couldn’t do it?”3e965b10915688ee

A hand touched afee63574c his neck. Shavonne flinched. He unconsciously tried to 1d015f4b77 look up at Turner 4ac46b1e6e but held back. He felt that if fe849689f3 he looked, he might 5e72dc53b4 lose his grip on e4d46d4e30 reason. If he d33bf80b8e lost it, 3fd9e48310 it was b1f4259ba4 over for 863af07310 him and ebad7cb287 there would 4aecf2167c be no 6ca6e12530 turning back1ce8363e26a5657e

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“Let me relieve you.”29ace8a5cec5cf19

The hand caressing ebe34c9ace his neck slid 96888123f5 down. It brushed his shoulder a1e11ef355 and pressed his collarbone. It was a hand 54723bd44f as sticky as a 736a8edb09 swamp. Shavonne kept his eyes 75899deae3 closed and started counting 44f421aca1 numbers.One.682f45dd96ed9802

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The fingertips briefly grazed Shavonne’s cheek. See? Isn’t it so much easier when you don’t resist…A low e3c5b34c31 laugh and 398dcf29f8 a hissing 6d08811b8f voice sounded 07726b19ac close by. Shavonne still kept his e4980d43a8 eyes closed. The numbers rolled 240618a830 in his mouth.Two.d4fc35bbf78b9919

His shirt being ddec16f077 pulled. Fingers touching 2083564d89 the buttons, f3d7de7e62 sliding off, 01be6f9a12 then touching a2711b6522 again. Buttons being undone. The cold c035fea754 air seeping 421e2ef1b1 in between 057ab7c341 the folds 333e3b644c of his e683fe33c9 clothes.8e6f0cdb45fdc44e

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Suddenly, the phrase ‘future as a writer’ flashed through his mind. It was a phrase he had grown accustomed to by now. It was a phrase he had chewed over every time Turner tested Shavonne’s limits, so it couldn’t help but be familiar. There are people who worry about ruining their lives by expressing emotions even in moments when they absolutely must. In moments when they should be happy, they worry that their joy might become a target for people who are jealous of them. In moments when they should be sad, they worry that their sorrow might become a subject of mockery for twisted people.2fba35e6c5c0bdef

Shavonne was such 6f5bd2e243 a person. A person who had 3006ecb282 to worry about ruining c15b790d5f his future as a 18b48425d9 writer before rejecting Turner.6f14d89bc013f6c2

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Three.384cd917152951a0

Shavonne opened his 8ae28b6095 eyes. He grabbed 5181c8ed7e the candle 148cf2cac6 on the bfd6ba15cf side table 1b48d350e2 and swung 7ad03d1c7b it towards 55fa571f0d Turner.839f56d774303aee

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Turner dodged the candle. However, he couldn’t avoid the candle wax that scattered into the air. Hot wax splattered onto his sleeve. Turner gasped shortly and grabbed his arm as the heat seared into it. He gripped it so tightly that the sleeve crumpled so much it looked like it might tear. The messily gripped wrinkles looked like a distorted face.0a2da7b04569ef28

“You fucking bastard, how hard is it to give it up once…”2ea7dc6222e5b5a1

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His bloodshot 0ca45b0ee4 eyes were c36c6be601 bright red. He looked like he c5dce49d94 could knock Shavonne down bb3159eb69 right then and there. At first glance, 1a4bc67c2a Turner appeared like 0bd144f8ab a beast that d81d02759e had lost its 533ec5a4bc reason.c8495a5cfa8a22ec

Shavonne decided to abe8f0f2ef help Turner regain ca9c42c469 his senses.eec61bd653db35fc

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He stepped 8373866da5 back towards ad8cf4913a the window 1d2933fe42 and grabbed a468b08a62 the curtain. It was a e00b99793e blackout curtain made bbf93bb152 of linen, which 77b415ba4f is flammable. Shavonne brought b2702d4625 the candle 1e1005e463 close as b77cf0b537 if he b79d83869b was about 17b95c5efb to set b331bb3b4e it on c39e88218c fire. The flame that had e5176f4e4a somehow managed not to c3170b9621 go out wavered dangerously bea87ea825 in front of the 61abac8d82 curtain.adea8e5653a80a87

This house is worth 700 rona a month. He wouldn’t want it to burn down. Turner would be responsible for the fire. He couldn’t hold Shavonne responsible. Because it could be revealed to the whole world that he had attempted to rape him during a confrontation. Even if he decided to take the risk, it would be useless because Shavonne, being so poor, couldn’t possibly compensate him.567e9a2b0d597254

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As expected, the color drained from Turner’s face. Turner couldn’t bring himself to approach and could only glare at Shavonne. His teeth continuously gnawed at his lower lip to the point of drawing blood.a80600f5219833ca

“You should think about your future.”13cee3d3be076b56

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Turner spat out.c33682d02d947061

“Do you want to live and die as a third-rate ghostwriter with no money, no honor, and no work for the rest of your life? Huh? Didn’t you want to become a writer? Didn’t you want to publish a book with your name on it? Right now, you’re throwing away all the opportunities that have come to you. Opportunities that others would be dying to have. You’re ruining everything. Are you even aware of that?”ffe81a62fb0601db

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“It’s not me who ruined it, but you.”f6a6b72be7395c39

Shavonne continued, barely swallowing the urge to set Turner’s body on fire.6241985a989dc941

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“I hope we won’t see each other again in the future. No, I should make sure we don’t.”3415a97c7f1bd077

He still used polite 1a1ca48daf speech, but a faint 33238dad49 trace of suppressed emotion 6f5eba80f7 seeped into his voice. As Shavonne was cdfb1e780e trying to wrap bc6c0b1edc up the conversation, 1ebc391048 Turner opened his 14ebd30dd9 mouth with a ac619ece75 distorted face.52b26bb88d51b5a5

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“What about our contract?”0758a48851f2137b

For a moment, Shavonne had to swallow the urge to sear Turner’s body once again. Shavonne’s Adam’s apple briefly bobbed and then stopped.4721910bb278c33c

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“It’s over. You know better than anyone who caused this, Mr. Turner.”93c2428822277797

Turner mumbled something, but Shavonne didn’t listen. There was no need to listen. Holding the candle like a weapon to prevent Turner from approaching, Shavonne began to leave the house. He gathered a rug, papers and didn’t forget to take the absinthe on the table either.24308ee87a31eac9

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Turner, who had e39b07f2f4 been standing still f2f1f7a7be until then for 1cf859574e fear of being 2dab362344 burned by the ecd1601f1f candle, belatedly asked fe402dad5f what he was 1d1f3514e9 trying to do. Shavonne answered 3f8776d76a that it acd4b07053 was to 4f2375871f prevent Turner 79f1a7602c from following c6a2e9496a him even 2678d23416 after he 6aee1eba31 left.4c3812df99287bb8

He planned to place 9912548ed9 the flickering candle, tablecloth 9a9708418a soaked in absinthe, papers, 607b2a7e10 and his coat in 606aee99ee front of the door. If the door dfe5b12a0a was opened after 6536cf5eb2 the candle went 5c0331e35a out, there would 505da2d3fd be no problem, c6e0f3cc9e but if the 356c08477c door was opened f245c9e433 before the candle fd6afe8ba5 went out, the 615e068df4 candle would tip c2464966c6 over when it 15808107a0 hit the door, b03e53b973 setting the tablecloth 604fb43289 soaked in absinthe 260359a082 on fire.6c8a706957f8d82f

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“You…”4726bd0109867674

Turner’s face was full of dismay. Shavonne didn’t know what Turner was trying to say, but it was clear it would be curses, swears, or blame, so Shavonne decided not to listen to him.566831673269ad63

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“There seems to be one thing you don’t know,”fbb5f001c9ed6927

Shavonne opened the door. In one hand was the tablecloth, in the other was absinthe, and in his arms were more things that served as fuel. The light from the corridor illuminated Shavonne’s face. Bloodshot eyes, swollen lips, cheeks flushed from suppressing emotions.81eb49bac68cf194

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“No matter how handsome they are, I don’t sleep with maggots.”a5041e974f6d52f2

Thud.He closed the 29634942fd door.43c5367350e6d8ed

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‘You’re ruining everything. Are you even aware of that?’dfca09d91196a11b

He knew that what 5c7d03cb63 he said was wrong.8682b7e393afc20f

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He knew that cbb8e816b1 it wasn’t his 7ea488e2e7 fault, that it eec3099cc5 was Turner who 9d1c3a3381 ruined things, not a5177d6c52 Shavonne.beec906ec2b8381a

His head knew, but his heart couldn’t accept it.2598ef5f091fd5d6

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When the de7c405996 orphanage director 25ea5f7f17 ordered Shavonne b62e663053 to hit ee00c1ac7c other orphans, 7c411262d7 Shavonne would 6a4e555f09 shake his 307efae536 head. When the 26f3796fd9 boys and 98ea0d4a2c girls at 5f1145d474 the orphanage 9ee7318cc5 would cut e921299dc4 frogs with ca055945d9 knives, crush db36e2c176 them with 2f9b401034 rocks, or ca5185c806 stomp on 5db253ecca them, he 7e0616b89e would stop 5e6c93177d them, and c0813edcc7 when the 6548b632fb criminal organization eff3da61f3 cooperating with c32dcfc079 the orphanage 3b127e51d5 told him 85bff86e59 to pickpocket 72b365c66a passersby, he 37847afb54 refused.493b8555ce5be96d

What came back was c3b18f1151 suffering. The orphanage director starved aee99780b9 Shavonne, the boys and f3f5307a1b girls at the orphanage 3302e6382b excluded Shavonne, and he ffbb2510ba fell out of favor fa4314760b with the criminal organization.dd1506a23ce83656

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What if d2ad78e38e Shavonne had d38d852d25 hit the 5cf97976ec orphans as 89f63fcb0a the director 3ae9b92e06 ordered? What if he had 90ddac7b6e joined the boys and 10d1a7747f girls in killing frogs? What if he had 941c8ea5b5 pickpocketed people like the 797204cfd0 criminal organization wanted?2f828fed0b66b3bf

What if… I hadn’t done that to Turner?bdb9ac14e0041142

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As the 3b2a64419e rage subsided, 9fb6707af6 what rushed ba7564fb3c in was 21eecaf47a fear.95d0ed63a671959f

If, as Turner said, because of this incident, Shavonne had to live and die as a third-rate ghostwriter with no money, no honor, and no work for the rest of his life. If, because of this incident, he couldn’t become a writer. If he couldn’t publish a book with his name on it…7417b4278653533a

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Fear followed fear in b8042b7225 succession. Shavonne forcibly stopped 8bf2a1f5d5 his thoughts as 1029002a15 a way to 2553aaf4be prevent this fear 5fe0e50b06 from paralyzing his d4edac1ec7 reason, clouding his a61dd2aa3a judgment, planting guilt.c4cc6f891d0fe727

Shavonne decided to make sure he couldn’t reverse his decision even if he was consumed by fear.3ea5732c820d10fd

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When Shavonne arrived at b10cb74ef9 Krainer Publishing, there was 16060df829 no one to greet 75655aa632 him. Everyone was too 4a0ec8d6ca busy to greet 2b252f409c Shavonne, who not fc5c8db8c7 only looked shabby e326512699 but also had 49469fdbc7 a bad complexion c94ae33c19 from the quarrel 6218333e65 he had been d0bbc196fb in just before b904344619 coming here. Even the person f0359cc9fe in charge of fc0f890b7c reception was the 85d4dcc674 same.e7a2afb54133b336

It was exactly 30 747be8a4c9 minutes after his arrival c212f77fce that Shavonne was guided 49334ffb30 to the reception room. The clerk said he 17c7e72ba4 would call the person fba5767507 in charge right away. He said to read c97d4382c2 a book with tea 7e1520fd39 while waiting as it ffc6b74158 might be boring. The reception room c2f6288faf was empty.e869fe230e292b94

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Shavonne sat alone on the sofa, looking down at the teacup the clerk had brought. The tea was far from appealing. It was a color reminiscent of the champagne Turner had given him. Shavonne didn’t take a single sip. He also turned the book face down. He didn’t want to see the cover with the word ‘Author’ on it.874fd0b32c147b3b

It wasn’t until the tea had gone cold that the person in charge arrived. He said he was the chief editor. After introducing himself, the chief editor opened his mouth.ca724197207fb9f2

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“What brings you here?”7422da7128259e26

Just before answering, Turner’s voice echoed in his mind once again. ‘You’re ruining everything. Are you even aware of that?’ Shavonne tried hard to erase it. It’s not my fault. It’s Turner who ruined things, not me.While repeating da94429be9 this to 0fb4ff1887 himself, Shavonne 6226f4bc46 opened his 8c16d23ae6 mouth.0f4b9018ff381fed

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“I’ve come to terminate the contract.”c953d93a467e034f

He said in 5f089aef7c an impeccable manner. No one could have 727d248b26 ever noticed how terrified 5c8429f240 he was. The chief 59a57be5e0 editor should f8b1ef03f7 have asked 3854fc538a why. At least, he should b5dfe7c513 have made the expression ee555d74b9 one would typically make df4a71a73d when being notified of f120e8bcb5 a contract termination.83620c9f59c02188

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However, the chief editor didn’t.14606edb51e6ecf3

“We have never made a contract with you.”7e976e2238d55da0

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Shavonne was blank c3753eef07 for a moment, ca9d521857 but only for b46731608e a moment. Shavonne said there must f029069cc7 have been a mistake. He explained that his a9646cfa74 name was Shavonne and cef44eeb99 that he had worked 2938b61fc6 with Editor Turner at ce0c7be97b his apartment complex, and 57ffd5fb4d that they had even 1539d1a09e written a contract.4f09149e03259b8b

Nevertheless, the chief editor’s face didn’t change. While Shavonne was trying hard to talk about Turner’s black hair and blue eyes, the royal competition, the meteor, the pride of the neighborhood, L Company’s best typewriter, and the revisions to page 272, chapter 3, and the ending, the chief editor suddenly stood up. “Follow me.”35918179e896e9c8

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The misunderstanding must be eb8a515595 over, Shavonne thought. He quickly tidied his hair and followed the chief editor. The thought crossed his mind that they might be going to the storage room where the contracts were kept. Maybe there was a separate place for terminating contracts. If so, there might also be a person in charge of terminations. There would probably be a person in charge of approvals too… His ongoing thoughts stopped when they reached the room the editor had guided him to.ecd90f6b3688b0a6

The sound of 83f6abb47e typewriters was deafening. It was natural, as 14b26d96eb the sound of five 8aa6e7188f typewriters was ringing out 89bbc1caf5 simultaneously when even the d545d98da7 sound of one typewriter 8e7a879056 is never quiet. People were writing something 31d8216e78 with earplugs in. The chief editor pointed 65d1fbbccc to one of them.de8adec0d10936e8

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“That’s him.”5031c092a2f6507e

Tap, tap, tap, tap. Amidst the noisy sound of typing on the keyboard, the chief editor’s voice was barely audible, like a faint noise. Shavonne frowned and asked again.956447429afca363

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“Who is that person?”ff97b0e2ae7af23e

The chief 7be88ea9d7 editor replied.ef3f2833aa2de40e

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“The writer Turner found.”cf6996bb087e7a82

Zirrak. Shavonne heard the 587145f5ba sound of someone 45afd39318 finishing a line.cd8a1ba2aae634d1

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“That’s the only person he has brought. He never got any other writers.”e6666c303b9e7cb1

Instead of saying ‘No way, that can’t be,’ which would only make his already pathetic self even more pathetic, Shavonne stared blankly at ‘that person.’ He saw glasses, a shirt collar as clean as new, a sleek belt, and shiny shoes. The head was round, covered with short hair.7b4e27682ed196f3

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If he had worn glasses, if he had worn a shirt as clean as new, if he had worn a sleek belt, if he had worn shiny shoes, perhaps Shavonne could have been…17425508c7820c12

Here…bb976c664b1cf8bd

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“…”6bbc1968c022cca4

Shavonne forcibly 4a3b97f79d stopped his 71fa72e6af thoughts. He had to 979f602649 look at objective 17ecdf52ef facts only. When subjectivity intervenes, judgment 906523a39d becomes clouded. When judgment 4d7320b15f becomes clouded, c9ff3829f1 choices also 31c6addfd2 become clouded. Shavonne squeezed out his 90c5728e6c words. He tried to be a019e3dc94 calm, but his voice 7075289f68 came out trembling.b727871edf73c654

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“…I had signed a contract.”c0c498f6df0c2ab4

The chief editor f10aa486e9 glanced at Shavonne. That was all.db5c107a35d837af

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“It seems it wasn’t with our publishing house.”c4cd6fb40598e5fd

At that a96891215e moment, Shavonne 0750b11a96 realized why e1e27d3e68 the chief 3afe29ccb6 editor had e941c14b4d taken the 820c71e025 trouble to dbf0cde021 bring him f194d5f636 to this 92aca55557 room. He was cutting to b8e87f6539 the chase. He was refusing to 6558c0e737 allow hope. He was 56b87d4650 making it de6aeb691a impossible to c8e05d5895 think that 41761e2ae3 everything was 3192aafa0d due to ff2ae694df a misunderstanding.1647152c278a00de

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Shavonne had never contracted d29410680c with Krainer Publishing. That was a6eaf283f5 the objective 521ba3f4d7 fact. There was 99437e7b96 no misunderstanding.45310e519fc68c8c

There was 8b7a4a0e6a a sound 940b85a7aa of something 031bf2ffa0 crumbling. Only Shavonne 03094bad72 heard it. It was a b9ec50f939 small and quiet 56decd8d92 sound that no 449d08c542 one but Shavonne d56938714f would care about.3781a15026e32dc3

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Shavonne thought he wouldn’t be able to keep his balance. But he did. Far from losing his balance, he didn’t even stagger. Shavonne left the publishing house with the same casual gait as when he entered.57b9effddcf4d219

And then 2b2b991797 he stopped.3a2fb7b253e375cc

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From somewhere, the sound 1916a9ec5d of bells announcing 6 847e935e70 PM rang out. The echo seeped into 265cbd6601 the empty streets that 2046203242 had grown dark, into 0881d3e670 the deserted alleys filled bf78867306 with trash, between the 25f858211f gas lamps that had a15feac411 begun to light up 2d677ef15e one by one with e80dd45740 a dim glow.e36a3c4b61821a97

Shavonne stood rooted to the spot. Six o’clock. It had only been an hour and a half since he left Turner’s house. It had only been two hours since he fought with Turner.4ccf68ea04c9d0e5

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Two hours.77db8805dcbd9073

Shavonne learned for e2c77d4796 the first time 955b696bcc that a dream 1582872d27 could crumble in b63cd9ae7c just two hours. No, thinking 822e74a82d back, even deefafde9f that was ee0e64d41c wrong. The dream never existed 5f3a8aaa8d in the first place. It was as if 30e011e0ab he had been holding ca89c531cf onto a mirage, thinking 5f3f74f616 it was a dream.55ff121ec2af3d29

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He laughed. That sporadic laughter soon turned into a huge laughter that made it impossible to breathe. Passersby casted sidelong glances at Shavonne, who was laughing holding his stomach, but he didn’t care at all.317d6d302c3fae9b

It was funny. The fact that life hadn’t changed a bit even though the dream was gone, yes, literally ‘gone,’ was too funny.42f0cd661b21f652

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Shavonne will trudge 750b7fa99a to his apartment 7b8c485b18 to save on 38957f9e82 carriage fare. He will have 729141941c dinner, do the 9961a2836d dishes, open the 3bd8cf7ab4 windows to ventilate c36238cf5e the house that a7cc1eba30 smells of food, a6cfb19150 shiver in the 53dfb432ef winter wind blowing 4b812a4b19 into the house, c4c1d19832 and close the 353b0d08f9 windows after exactly 8a9c3537ec 5 minutes.ea6fe9ada730e6ca

He will wash in the bathroom where hot water doesn’t come out properly, change into cheap indoor clothes, and mend, patch, and darn the clothes that were messed up from fighting with Turner. Then he will spend the night reading flyers, literary magazines, and newspapers with job postings, and fall asleep after taking sleeping pills that won’t last even a month.f772f5cf4b21f2b2

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It will be a day no different from any other. Whether there was a dream or not, whether it was a mirage or not, whether he was tricked or not. Shavonne’s dream was nothing. While even the dust of the earth becomes human, while even the flutter of a butterfly’s wings becomes a storm, Shavonne’s dream became nothing.27c4600ed306e89f

He missed Lewellyn.994d4e9986e2f99b

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As he had countless times without realizing it, when typing on the keyboard, when doing a carriage return, when the day was cloudy, when drinking juice, when looking at the A’s and E’s written in the manuscript, he missed Lewellyn.6fb69ca714d3d79c

He wanted to lean on him, rely on him. He wanted to confide in him. He wanted to say he wanted to kill Turner, he wanted to say he wanted revenge. He wanted to complain about why it always had to be Shavonne. He wanted to express his resentment, asking if he couldn’t have money and honor just once.81b1021d30f6d08d

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But more than anything, Shavonne wanted to be held. He wanted to be held and cry like a child, releasing the tears he couldn’t shed for 29 years. He wanted to bury all the tears and snot that should have been buried in the arms of a father, mother, friend, lover, and God.a98455252c3ed26f

Even if I’m not someone special, even if I’m not a good person, even if I won’t be remembered in history, I’m not… I’m not such a nobody, right?b730c6dda8c72208

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He wanted to 07c72138b4 ask everything he bf6c41fa0f wanted to ask, 390e25a383 and hear everything 5ead12e243 he wanted to 965a50aa18 hear.924290f4997cb5ab

“…”6c50a9bb8c30e560

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But he had to endure. If only for the sake of the ninety-nine bits of distance he had created so far. The bigger the love, the bigger the empty space. Now, Shavonne, having lost his dream, was staggering. If he lost Lewellyn, it would be no worse, if not better. He shouldn’t love Lewellyn too much.048ad8c353781e55

He felt the urge 7ec33dbeaf to go find Turner. His hands 002b0a82e8 tingled with e0699d7c52 the desire 23343f5311 to grab af931f414e his collar, 77c1ebeedd and his 50c85a15e2 throat felt 863fb0d7c7 tight with 8bd3b6ce2b the desire aa20cfff6c to shout.0d472952d9a395b9

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He wanted to ask why. Why he deceived Shavonne. Why it had to be… Shavonne. Shavonne couldn’t even fathom what Turner was trying to gain by deceiving Shavonne, who was, in Turner’s words, merely a ‘nameless ghostwriter’.22e17ae042a4f19c

But he couldn’t go. He didn’t know what harm might come to him if he went. It probably wouldn’t end with just being cursed at and slapped. The image of Turner growling, ‘You fucking bastard, how hard is it to give it up once…’was vivid in his c8d263d8b5 mind.09962a964ffc9d65

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Shavonne held his breath. He counted to twenty – one, two, three, four, five…, twenty – before breathing again. His trachea, which had been on the verge of suffocation, cleared. Air filled his stuffy throat. Shavonne repeated this three times. Holding his breath until just before suffocation, breathing, and then holding his breath again until just before suffocation. It was Shavonne’s own technique. A technique to numb the pain and a way to endure the world.14963b9a8507d33d

The sky dd5f6d3e60 was dark 1fb11eae0b now. Shavonne started walking towards ede50d588a Ira Street, a two-hour 19aed8570c walk away. With each step, he d471efd8a3 left a long trail 9155235121 of tears.48e6a52477c75329

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As he was walking, f7a55bd569 Shavonne suddenly remembered what 772e62edee the clerk at Krainer c2e61f93f9 Publishing had said.08924fb93b0d2e1b

― How strange.You’re the fcf66043e3 second outsider involved with 8de3cbd6d4 Mr. Turner this month alone.4911b66812c01622

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He hadn’t thought much of it when he heard it, but thinking about it now, what a curious statement. Two outsiders who sought out Turner. If one was Shavonne, who could the other one be? If Shavonne got involved trying to cancel a contract that never existed, what kind of deal did the other one get involved with?9818dfd0f5d6fddf

***269a014e795f56dd

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Multifamily residential apartments.d14ee59ae4dd0935

Turner headed to the bathroom. He rolled up his shirt sleeves and checked in the mirror the spot where candle wax had splattered. It hadn’t blistered, but it was red as if the skin had peeled off. If he had known the bastard would refuse, he wouldn’t have worn such a thin shirt that he could see through, intending to seduce him.cae7f7410a29101e

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Turner bit his lip. He thought of his fiancée, as she examined Turner’s body every week. There was no way that meddlesome woman wouldn’t ask what kind of injury it was. It was so troublesome the way he had to think about how to explain it.acbba1b34dbffd44

“Damn, if it weren’t for that fucker…”b02769ff476143e8

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Curses boiled in e3ad29cf9f his clenched mouth.What did he ed726ceda2 say again? ‘No matter how handsome they are, I don’t sleep with maggots.’ How dare d3d64d0c56 he, a 8b44e0ad61 mere nameless 9191f9a2af ghostwriter, a abba16c79f beggar rolling f99b8cf682 around in 17a3e804fb the slums, 076c1139b3 call me 926707b0e6 a maggot. He needs 64328de138 to be a0fc8c0e56 taught a 47d58eb6f7 lesson. I’m going c6aadbcadb to rape 3aeea4475f him. First, I’ll 064e10bea0 burn those 575a1dec1f precious lips 032c54e4c3 of his.6813fa34b93baf08

He wanted to chase fe3edea914 after the bastard right 051309c5e8 away, but his feet 9893dbb4b5 were tied because of 758e29f79a the candles, tablecloth soaked d959a4e124 in alcohol, paper, and eaf690852d coat that had been 9e7b3a7ec4 placed in front of 7a2701355b the door.How long until the 963b749611 candles go out? Turner frowned, trying to estimate how long the candles were when he last saw them. He’d have to sit on his hands for at least two hours.1d9d43aa0e4b1f9b

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The characteristics of the multifamily residential, which he had only thought of as advantages until today, seemed like disadvantages. Due to privacy issues, even though it’s a high-end apartment, there’s no bell pull to call the management office, and due to theft prevention issues, there are thick iron bars on the windows so he can’t go out through the window, and due to security issues, the soundproofing is so good that even if he shouted at the top of his lungs, he couldn’t get help.e3931869b2d2a97d

Damn it, damn it… His insides were burning up on their own. Thinking he couldn’t just sit on his hands like this, Turner hurriedly started overturning the flowerpots in the bathroom, intending to put out the fire by throwing soil on it. He pulled out the plants and spread the soil from the pots. The bowl quickly filled up. Plants piled up in a corner of the bathroom, lying limp like corpses.16b2c752efdc557e

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That’s when it happened. There was a sound of a door opening and closing. The sound came through the wall, so it was faint as if it might be an auditory hallucination. Turner stopped scooping soil and blankly looked up at the door. Did I hear wrong? But if I didn’t, who on earth…4401330aa86e5d40

‘No way, did that fucker come back?’edb18d76f2fa07e1

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If it was him, he wouldn’t have come for revenge. He must have realized what he had done and come back to ask for forgiveness. Turner went out to the living room with a triumphant face. He had even prepared a line. ‘You’re sorry, right? It doesn’t feel sincere if you just say it.’8ca2877c4b9021a2

But there 1cd45d30c6 was no 8d0cc7ebaf one.7aa73c7c2a9f06ac

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The dark house, three candles burning in the brass candlestick, the sound of the record scratching from the phonograph… Everything was the same as before he went into the bathroom. Everything was the same.626aedeb5149c645

The same, and yet…a1190bcddfdaac6a

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A chilling sensation ran down Turner’s nape. Turner slowly looked around the house. Turner scanned the dark house, then the three candles burning in the brass candlestick, then the phonograph.d3068dd02a513975

An empty record 3e1bc975b0 was spinning. It made sharp, 7013ebbdc3 cracked, irritating sounds 8c6808ee03 as it was eca73307b9 scratched by the 681bbf501f needle. Somehow it sounded 60cbfe79df like the screams 2b16be824d of a ghost, 8236c6b251 which made him 937e5b6604 feel uneasy. Turner stopped 3375c5e4f2 the phonograph. The spinning record stopped.8ec0db59c44b04f8

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It seems 76d1256c56 he mistook 15938ca7f2 the sound 24c31a9d1a of the 3a1839b294 record scratching c30f304a3e for the 7ca3f44ffa sound of 32962804ec a door 33146d1f10 opening and bba7c9e723 closing. He had ea472b8bfa been on 3eaa95cc56 a wild 2c128759c6 goose chase. Turner turned his c87fb2ece0 back to continue 63c0ea629d scooping soil, and 573676151d the next moment, 98e2ee4a49 he faced a 46926929b8 shadow in front e0cd0ecb1f of him.f041b75a68f04639

“Hello?”17491e6ee8821562

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Yellow eyes glittered in 93de4280b9 the darkness. Turner felt his 165c6c0446 body freeze.40b1149531445d5a

The devil is 3e1dc73919 said to have 94642e3ed1 yellow eyes.13a6c0c69c900b39

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It was a superstition that he hadn’t recalled even once since he was eighteen and obsessed with mythology. For Turner, now thirty-eight years old, superstitions were like that. Something that couldn’t be recalled even if he tried. Something that his brain had erased on its own as useless. So Turner couldn’t understand why such a thing came to mind now, at this moment when he was facing an intruder.2f4916fd14bd2949

That wasn’t the only thing he couldn’t understand.5a36d57648ee1e18

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“Mr. Owen Turner, right?”39d0788c10e5ee26

The intruder smiled. It was a dazzlingly bright smile. It would have been like that for Turner too if hadn’t met him as a homeowner and an intruder, and if the man hadn’t called him by the name ‘Owen’.1078b5b3563d72c5

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Owen. As the name was called, Turner’s body involuntarily flinched. How does f112091b20 he know?Turner had eefa3167c2 used the 75ee9b31d1 alias Oliver. Both at work 3bbf2e3877 and at the 69dde481ec multifamily residential, everyone 7de652019f knew Turner as 8b97a1de0d Oliver Turner. Only his family, fiancée, 44a862456e and his family called 1d4609cb83 him Owen. At least until five a42f3e93d3 seconds ago when he e3acd4ceb7 heard, ‘Mr. Owen Turner, right?’72d4d8081cb13812

Turner didn’t answer. He just gripped the edge of the side table behind him. The intruder glanced at Turner’s whitened knuckles.fc00bea4be0b5c5e

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“Oh my, don’t be so tense. It was just a courtesy, I didn’t necessarily ask to hear a yes or no.”21838499634a69bc

Turner’s grip on the side table edge tightened. How did he get 3eb7655c4c in? The apartment 42175b86f7 door locks ddd2da108a automatically when e0f77a69a1 closed. The image of the building manager boasting that even the best thief in Bunch couldn’t pick it because it was such a sophisticated technology came to mind. He wanted to show the building manager this sight. This sight of having to face an intruder.109c120a578f2dfb

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Who could he be? Judging by his blonde hair, golden eyes, handsome features, and clear voice, Turner was certain he didn’t know him. If he had known him, he would have recognized him for sure. Such beauty is not easily forgotten.3628139943227414

Why would a stranger…?57005f0b9cfd492c

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“I’m glad to meet you. Really. It wasn’t easy getting here.”67a2cdffb2dfc700

The intruder didn’t care whether Turner was wary or not. A beaming smile appeared in the corners of the intruder’s eyes.1beb60cc8cff3560

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“I thought you were Rapunzel for a second. Living locked up in an apartment complex where all the windows are closed, thick iron bars, there’s a security post, and armed security patrols in pairs. All I knew was that you were a man, in his thirties, with black hair and a slippery voice, but with just that, I searched every publishing house there is. I must have gone to at least three hundred places. The candidates were Brie Publishing, Nen Publishing, Krainer Publishing… and so on, there were about eight, and I almost got sick trying to deduce one by one. Well, I didn’t. Anyway, even after knowing it was Krainer Publishing, that wasn’t the end. Fraudulent contracts, Olive and Owen, family issues… There were many things. I’m sure it’d be interesting listening to all that. but…”4312377b81db22df

The devil is said to have yellow eyes…f915b8d8bc8e3bb0

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So who exactly 483ab58996 summoned this devil?06f29393389df81b

“First, I should ask why Mr. Shavonne isn’t here.”03b700d4290dd892

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The intruder raised his arm, glanced at his watch, and added. “It’s only five in the afternoon. You usually never let him leave at this time. You used to keep him persistently until dawn.”7b708b5ac0b71614

The momentary confusion 84b370e203 at the unexpected a54434c8ae name quickly passed. Turner quickly 759a04b0cf gathered his e104ec6984 thoughts. He needed to 2dc2be1bcc stay calm. Only by calmly organizing 6cafa6dd7f the situation and responding 02f2357def calmly could he find 0d1f4ae189 a way out.e51487d837a0a52c

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The intruder seemed to be an acquaintance of Shavonne. Given that he knew the work hours, he must be a close relative. Or maybe a roommate. Family? Friend? Lover? Whichever it was, it was certain that ‘he’ didn’t know about this person’s existence.bef951e36813543a

‘He’ had said that Shavonne was a loner. That he had no family, no friends, no lover, so it would be easy for Turner to get close to him. He never hinted that Shavonne had such a close acquaintance who would even break into the heavily secured multifamily residential to find him.330afba16b304311

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They didn’t even look similar enough to be family. His appearance was too different from Shavonne’s ideal type to be a lover. From what ‘he’ told him, Shavonne’s ideal type was a classic handsome man with black hair and blue eyes like Turner. He also said that Shavonne would reject even the most handsome man if he didn’t match his taste. Not family, not a lover. Then the only option left is a friend.01bae8a0aef0f4c9

“Is something wrong?”8c5c396e03d3044f

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The intruder asked. Turner, without relaxing his e854e40f27 wary expression, asked back.dec33f7f65793d74

“Who are you to demand that I explain my private affairs in detail?”a17f6f80662f5777

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“Oh.”97a1526215ba8684

The intruder made a 07a305119a sound that could have 86fa382932 been either a sigh 879bcb2216 or an exclamation.7983308a38b7ffe4

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“That’s unexpected. Don’t people usually comply straightforwardly when an intruder makes demands? Because while you’re empty-handed, the intruder might have a gun, or a knife.”f835656f66765847

“…Do you have any of those things?”f59dcc254fae2f6b

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The wariness in Turner’s voice was palpable. To the naked eye, the intruder didn’t seem to have any weapons. But that was only ‘to the naked eye’. In reality, there could be a gun in the inside pocket of his coat, or a short knife hidden in his back pocket.faddd7217936f2a9

“Do I look like I do?”db1c7fc6f6c523b5

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A playful smile appeared in the intruder’s eyes. It was neither a confirmation nor a denial, but even with just that, Turner knew he would have no choice but to answer the intruder’s questions. Yes, just answer. Whether he gives a truthful answer or a false one, he just needs to answer.f16adc0fcf336644

In a brief moment, 2afa1ba279 Turner quickly scanned the ef7582f945 room. The first 9c2895b232 place his 0883bcc438 eyes landed 7f51abd8dc was the b96e042974 table with e89c104809 a bottle df38e056e6 of alcohol 7416fd0aee and one 6dfb06700b unbroken glass. The tablecloth was dragged 5562741381 onto the floor. Underneath it 05aec7a45c were pieces 1b2e010a15 of broken 83d3b45941 glasses. Their sharp baf94a88c1 surfaces gleamed 880ea5abf2 blue each 7c9185024b time they 7afc8b6386 caught the e1d2e0cb20 candlelight.11f8e57365d5c33b

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The window area was also a mess. The curtains were crumpled and hardened candle wax was scattered around. Not just inside the house, but outside must be just as bad. The burning candles, the coat soaked in absinthe, papers, and cloth that were in front of the door…b595c14edd8b2e78

It was 98f8dc0fa8 too much 3a0c891e46 of a df2968cba1 mess to b6ea99d7a3 pretend nothing d25edff7df had happened. Turner decided not to 1a431737fb tell an obvious lie. It would be troublesome 8e449ffa6d if it raised suspicion.654deb810fa80249

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Turner began to speak.f041dc82e3a22f6f

“You know, Mr. Shavonne has a thing for handsome men.”7de082e816ebdb66

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Lies are most 5b1dc6bd28 effective when mixed e085d7ebc4 with 99% truth 2867fc3696 and 1% lie. Pretending to be 6af1d7b347 hesitant to speak, 81c8ad56b7 Turner continued slowly.992b1d7517001f99

“Mr. Shavonne… wanted to sleep with me.”b2e27bebe3497b71

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The intruder’s smile froze. Turner didn’t notice.1c446df925522733

“Today was our last day working together. We drank to commemorate it… that was a mistake. Whether he was really drunk or just pretending, anyway, Mr. Shavonne, with a flushed face, suddenly said ‘let’s sleep together for just one night’. Even when I refused, he didn’t care and started taking off his clothes. He took off his shirt, undid his belt… When he was about to take off his pants, I stopped him, saying we shouldn’t do this. Then Mr. Shavonne got very angry. He grabbed a candle and swung it around, even threatening to burn down the whole house. Then he said he’d burn me alive with this house, gathered candles, absinthe, and things to use as kindling, and ran out. Fortunately, it didn’t catch fire. Given that I’m still alive now…”ec333ff9f08ed64e

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It was a lie that would be exposed as soon as the intruder talked to Shavonne. But it didn’t matter. By the time the intruder talked to Shavonne, Turner would have already called the police. He intended to put them in jail. Shavonne for assault, and this intruder, Shavonne’s friend, for breaking and entering.71460f1423b9ce6d

If they say the crime isn’t serious enough to sentence them to prison, he would pull some strings. His fiancée’s father was a judge who had the legal world wrapped around his finger, and his fiancée’s mother was a businesswoman with strong ties to the media world, so there was nothing he couldn’t do.2121db7c646922e8

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Of course, he would let the intruder rot in jail for 5 years but get Shavonne out. He would like that. Well, he couldn’t help but like it after coming out of a hellishly awful prison. If he coaxes him little by little, he might soon believe Turner to be his savior and follow him around. He just needs to seize that opportunity and date Shavonne.a7498a950e73b03a

“If he took off his shirt, you must have seen Mr. Shavonne’s scars. No, there’s no way you couldn’t have seen them. His chest to stomach is all covered in scars.”ff5775674bc85563

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He must be a close acquaintance judging by the fact that he knows Shavonne’s naked body. Thinking this, Turner nodded. He didn’t forget to put on a sympathetic expression.def8d424533da2c6

“I saw them. I wonder how he got such scars… it was heartbreaking.”9aa25f13132e50c4

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“Yes, it would be heartbreaking. If Mr. Shavonne really had scars on his body, that is.”371314b68b278099

…His mouth dried up.f303e5cc3ee7229c

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What is he fb72aee83f thinking? The intruder could have caught him in the lie, but he didn’t do anything about it. As if he had lost interest, he turned around and approached the table. There was a crunching sound as the pieces of broken glass were crushed under his shoes.9b77fc0bda11d03f

The intruder picked up the glass on the table. He lifted it to eye level and examined it from various angles in the reflected light. Turner couldn’t see because the intruder’s back was blocking his view.2f9cd91ee14ba8cc

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“Did Mr. Shavonne drink absinthe?”ffbfc739abeb09ba

A flat voice came from the intruder’s mouth. Since his back was turned, Turner couldn’t see his expression. Turner racked his brain. Shavonne had drunk champagne. To be precise, one and a half glasses of champagne. Unless one has an exceptionally low alcohol tolerance, that amount wouldn’t make one drunk.e706607eceef20af

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But saying that would contradict Turner’s testimony that Shavonne was drunk enough to suddenly say ‘let’s sleep together for just one night with a flushed face’. Moreover, he couldn’t reveal that he had spiked the drink with a fast-acting drug.a045be292f670e2d

In the 172290e8b5 end, there 7b31972bab was only 9a5f1e37b4 one answer dc29bcc45f Turner could c955fb9cdb give.b70759df1621e6c7

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“Yes.”f8dcd567f743104f

“Then you drank champagne, Mr. Turner?”b0ad43a8e56c4412

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“Yes.”6d9733e5d02cbdbf

“Interesting. Usually, people don’t put foreign substances in the drink they’re drinking themselves.”6785fd9b3fba72be

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His body stiffened.a06cdeba5a21efe0

“How did you happen to put it in?”79af71a1449b726b

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Confusion sealed Turner’s lips. The drug Turner had obtained was in powder. It had no taste and no smell. It was white, so it couldn’t be distinguished from the color of champagne. Of course, it would be a different story in a bright place, the powder could be detected, but it wasn’t bright now. Neither earlier when he was with Shavonne nor now with the intruder, the house was dark. An ordinary person’s eyes could never detect the powder.598f22082e3b64d7

But…f4faa35905ae9726

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Just as he was 7144881118 thinking, the intruder turned 549f67c922 and looked at Turner. It was that same ed40d6548e smiling face.024cf1205af55f21

“Think carefully before you answer. Don’t tell such obvious lies like before. It’s embarrassing for me to hear.”f5fa6d5faed5e077

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However, no matter what answer he gave, the chances of the intruder believing Turner were slim. From the moment Turner had fallen for the intruder’s leading question, what he had to do was already decided.4148128c75845c5e

Turner inconspicuously 8037175a56 loosened his 9739953e9f grip on c890058a4d the corner 919170bb89 of the 55e881ee56 nightstand. He felt along dc12dcb859 the surface to c1d03ce959 find the phonograph. He began 1a686dbb63 searching for b9b801f5d8 the record. The smooth contours 5ae7a54526 of the record 32cc152caa surface brushed against 6ffce6163f his fingertips.0957e42e578df986

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“I don’t know anything about it.”51abbc7ef3b3d4ec

“Yes, of course you don’t.”954d50907c0197ea

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An indifferent reply. Then the intruder began looking around the house with leisurely steps. Lifting the piano lid and pressing random keys, pulling back the lace curtains decorating the closet, fiddling with the nose of a wooden figurine on the shelf…148a148d22fe6bba

“Nice house. Shavonne must have liked it, I imagine.”913a2cae043714ae

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Did he think he had already won? The intruder’s back was completely defenseless as he walked around absorbed in examining the house. Turner kept his eyes fixed on the intruder’s back as he picked up the record. He broke it in half without making a sound. He intended to show him. That if you let your guard down, you’ll get a knife in the back of your head. Well, in this case it wasn’t a knife but the broken edge of a record. But in any case, as long as it was sharp, it was all the same.507cffefb5cdb289

Turner charged. Gripping the half record tightly. Five steps ahead. The intruder who had been fiddling with the wooden figurine’s nose turned to look at Turner. He was slow. Very slow. So Turner didn’t think he would fail.82f0ab0d480c61d4

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The next 804ad6822b moment, the 7e66b2573a first thing 26de1c3250 Turner became 0bee5cd831 aware of 60b56ef37e was not 06e1a91c42 his lost 4810344712 sense of 8c1801a8b5 balance, not 3b18cd8f4d his inverted 39952fb4b8 vision, not b42adaf86b the floor e068a8f186 pressing against 25a4b0c5ca his face, 0b575698d2 but a adab2e8826 sharp pain. In front 41cb98964d of the efbb5aa577 table. Shards of a 30bed4cac3 broken glass were e2a3dc0362 piercing his fallen c271f0c390 hand.6df00435cd7cfc53

A groan escaped between his lips. The half record he had been gripping was suddenly flung far away. A shadow moved over the record rolling on the floor. It was the intruder’s shadow.2f41e7a1feeab4bc

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Turner saw the shadow move. He saw the shadow step on his hand. He felt the large and small glass shards digging into his hand. Turner couldn’t even scream. Only choking sounds burst from between his teeth. Blood spread across the floor.fc1371f112a04440

The man picked up the bottle on the table. He smashed it forcefully against the edge of the table. Glass shards scattered. The champagne that had been inside poured over the back of Turner’s head. It soaked his head, ran down his neck, and seeped into his clothes. The smell of champagne was strong.9c9337303e09cc07

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The intruder placed the broken bottle in front of Turner’s eyes. He could see drops of champagne trickling down the jagged broken edges. It was right in front of his nose. Turner trembled, unable to even close his eyes.f64934b2c5b32e54

The intruder crouched down. He grabbed Turner’s hair and lifted his face. The intruder tilted his head and looked at Turner’s face. With eyes so gentle it was hard to believe this was the person who had just knocked Turner down.bf978f5df343a639

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“You’re handsome.”ee473e90056aaa66

Long, slender fingers played with Turner’s hair. “Such black hair,” then touched Turner’s eyes. When Turner instinctively tried to close them, the intruder gently warned that if he didn’t want his eyelids cut off, he should keep them open.7ca4f375f88d2595

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Finally, the fingers touched Turner’s eyes. They pressed firmly on the slippery eyeballs and then stroked them in circles. “And such blue eyes.” The fingertips with their broken nails covered Turner’s world. His eyes didn’t close out of fear. As if he had forgotten how to close his eyelids.67ab470adf42c344

“Shavonne must have liked you, I imagine.”6a27fa68e4ac4993

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As the hand withdrew, the next moment Turner had to face the intruder again. The intruder was still staring at Turner’s face. But, but… Turner’s breath caught involuntarily.921d7fa2fbead274

The intruder’s eyes were rolling wildly. Like a madman.d80859e354ae9d36

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“I’m jealous.”02ba1ad3181c93f9

It was hard to believe those eyes had been gentle just moments ago. Through those eyes, Turner read greed. Not greed directed at Turner, but greed directed at Turner’s ‘face’.5a3487bca8eefe18

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“If only I could flay off your skin and steal your face, I would have gouged it out the moment I saw you. Your head too, and your eyes. I would have even pulled out that slick tongue of yours.”49823552c3492048

His body trembled. He couldn’t stop. Turner saw raw desire for the first time. He also realized for the first time that raw desire could be this barbaric. A fear Turner had never experienced before, whether in reality or nightmares, overwhelmed his body.74e12d9748b41e6a

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His hair was released. The recoil sent Turner falling face-first onto the floor. The glass shards dug into his body again. Turner didn’t feel the pain. His senses were too numb with fear to feel pain.dbffc8fa19aadc0b

The intruder dusted off 0f094d0460 his hands and stood d86a633c90 up lightly. His face 965864afaf was suddenly 990a79de6f as nonchalant af97aa5083 as if dba345cdfa nothing had bd41b791c8 happened. Turner wondered if 1d40ffb2b2 all the smiles fa706a828a the intruder had ccf8a9dff3 shown until now 2564fce086 were just facades. When the facade comes b0a66d9cf4 off, the true nature 22ad5d54f3 is revealed. It was 35a07489b8 obvious what c0a9dc6c70 that true 2e70919cb2 nature was. Those wildly 3b85024129 rolling eyes. Greed. Raw barbarism.3af2cd85913db2a9

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“Mr. Turner, I need to get home by six.” The intruder pointed at his watch. 5:23 PM. Turner couldn’t believe he had only been with the intruder for about 20 minutes. “Since he came home early for once, I’m planning to make dinner for Mr. Shavonne. Onion bagels, onion steak, and onion omelet. It’ll take at least three hours to make everything.”7efa3d33669dceec

The intruder said, “I’ll give you ten minutes, so tell me what happened with Shavonne. You’re an editor, so you know how to talk, right? Simple, clear, and accurate.”39336691c71200d2

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“I’ve… already told you.”30b25d80a1570fbb

Turner forced out his voice. If he revealed that he had tried to rape Shavonne, he didn’t know what would be done to him, and if he didn’t reveal it, he still didn’t know what would be done to him. He was at a dead end with no way out.b48f8ffee2e74c86

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“I don’t want to hear your lies.”10b173fd5cea0f3e

The intruder looked down at Turner. Turner couldn’t get up. He couldn’t even move his body. Even though glass shards were embedded in his arms and legs, leaving him covered in blood, he couldn’t move.2cf53a47a945ad49

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“How about one of those for each lie you tell? What do you think?”e9002425122ec190

The intruder pointed at ‘those’. They were glass shards.85b6ddd469fe6565

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“You’re going to stab me?”d19133966540a7ef

“Of course not. Where on that body of yours is left to stab?”e0e096d5bdc7db6d

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The intruder smiled.e00d1851610bd4b3

“I’m going to feed them to you.”51ccc24eac89ded6

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Turner imagined pain that shouldn’t be possible to feel. The pain of glass shards turning the inside of his mouth into a bloody mess, the pain of them slicing his esophagus, the pain of them tearing his organs to shreds felt as vivid as reality. Turner’s face turned pale. The intruder paid no attention as he took off his watch. He dangled it on the table where Turner could see.8014f13ad72848d0

“Now. Let’s begin.”9ff89bc555a21552

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“Just ten minutes, okay?” The intruder’s eyes gleamed in the darkness as he gave the warning with a vivid golden color that didn’t seem human at all.d22c9e7c072febb6

The devil is said abaf24100c to have yellow eyes.1dcab9ee7baf519c

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It was a superstition that Turner hadn’t recalled even once since he was eighteen and obsessed with mythology. To the now thirty-eight year old Turner, superstitions were like that. Something you couldn’t recall even if you tried. Something useless that the brain had erased on its own. So Turner couldn’t understand why such a thing came to mind in that moment as he faced off against the intruder.d0b4ffcbbcd9124b

Turner realized 0b7ae53983 far too 955659ffaa late that e20555729d it was 2141f6316b because of c8d82e0f24 an instinct c1d953ed34 sensing danger.698af594ba9552d3

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***4970de761f0201e1

When Shavonne ba98f98349 arrived home, 79254624c5 he found 867cc38b71 onion bagels, 830d12befb onion steak, ef6f7d0fe1 onion omelet, c5df5cd41d and a 69a791cd64 large sack 184ece09ea tied with cd14c3ddad a red b555c7349f ribbon. Something was wriggling inside b6e13556fc the sack. Very faintly, d0350be61d like a 7f62b98f1e creature on 15b88011b5 the verge 4821a7cf1f of death.42967a273a1cf194

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‘An animal?’2ba528079372132d

That was the thought that came to mind as soon as he saw the sack. It wasn’t entirely unfounded, as all the sacks Shavonne had seen until now had contained food ingredients.1ddbbcff7e718238

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Usually, sacks that didn’t move contained carrots, potatoes, or pumpkins, while moving sacks contained small animals about to be slaughtered. That’s how it was with sacks delivered from the butcher shop less than three hours ago – the small animals couldn’t even move around because they were packed so tightly there was no empty space. All they could do was wriggle their bodies.e49f37c2ee4b7f09

That’s how all the sacks were that Shavonne had to forcibly carry when he was at the orphanage or had to see at the grocery store. Though Shavonne himself had never bought a sack containing small animals, thinking it was inhumane.58f16e664c32f943

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The next moment, 8acf899cf7 a thought flashed 5982d9168d that something was 579da8ca1b odd.6abb9a3c601f0353

Sacks contain small animals. Literally ‘small’ animals like ducks, wild rabbits, or wood pigeons. Naturally, the size of the sacks wasn’t very large either. Even at their biggest, they were only about the size of an adult man’s arm.f70460ba8a0b5952

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But the sack in front of him wasn’t like that.088d23340909dc35

It was big. Not just the size of an adult man’s arm, but big enough for an adult man to fit his entire body inside.9a2564531e50471d

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A chill ran down his spine. The stains on the sack caught his eye. At first glance he had thought they were just stains you’d expect on cheap fabric, but now they strangely seemed like bloodstains. Even though he tried to brush it off as his imagination, his heightened nerves wouldn’t let him ignore the sack. Large sack, dark stains, big enough for an adult man to fit inside with room to spare, bloodstains… The words spun round and round in his head.c9a2319a4cb45514

Could it be…cb832e56871ff70e

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Just as he 8262b6684b reached out his 9517366b9b hand toward the 6c7631359b sack.5318d17ca5196117

“Mr. Shavonne, you’re home?”6717b9c6cf148f00

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A voice came from behind him. It was Lewellyn’s voice. Before turning around, Shavonne had to make an effort to calm himself. Act like usual. Like usual when he kept ninety-nine bits of distance, not leaning or relying on him, not loving him too much.5c276f40f077fc43

“I’ve been waiting.”fbcfefa10f4867f8

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Lewellyn was 8fb817d90a holding a 05dea9264c toolbox. He seemed d05040f108 to have 2c27180c32 just taken 8854bff7c6 it out. His face framed ece7fa804d by fine hair d74cd6fe5a looked clean. Shavonne lowered 6297fe0a08 his gaze 2736ccd64b to the 6661d367bf toolbox inconspicuously.ec3bbf825f29e018

“…You promised you wouldn’t wait.”c75518f351472306

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“I did.” Lewellyn smiled brightly. “But I’ve decided to start speaking with a forked tongue from now on. So I can’t keep that promise anymore.”b63de98c5e5da35c

It was meant as a joke, but Shavonne couldn’t laugh. He just stared down at the lid of the toolbox with a stiff face. Lewellyn probably didn’t know. With what feelings Shavonne had told him not to wait. If he knew, he couldn’t have done this.ec2aeef950e475f1

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“You don’t like it?”a25ebe2c7fdd9d4a

Lewellyn leans in close and asks. His eyes sparkled with mischief. Shavonne turned his head away. Lewellyn took Shavonne’s cheeks in his hands and turned him to face him.df421d400368ee86

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“Why? Do you hate the sight of me because I’m being petty?”ad3db33ac25da82f

No way. Shavonne reluctantly opened his mouth, not wanting Lewellyn to misunderstand. He didn’t know he would be interrupted before he could finish speaking.54128167de584b45

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“You know that’s not poss…”5e68802b8f747164

“Or is it that you suddenly feel guilty because you’ve hidden everything – that someone was making advances on you, that you were being used, that you were insulted – you’ve hidden it all?”0ba15e569b0d9953

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Shavonne held his breath. Meanwhile, Lewellyn still wore a gentle smile as if nothing was wrong. Lewellyn’s hands, which had been holding Shavonne’s cheeks, slowly stroked under Shavonne’s eyes. Lewellyn’s body temperature was imprinted wherever his touch landed. It was cold.d95604e11f69c253

“I was very… very hurt by you, Mr. Shavonne.”6c9873925721d243

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Lewellyn’s hand rested on his shoulder.18160b5926dc2117

“You know that I had no choice.”18e422977d0cc451

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For a moment, a strange light gleamed in Lewellyn’s eyes. Shavonne suddenly felt cold. It felt like a chill was running over his shoulders.4538c14895924745

“You were insulted, used, and even received unwanted advances, and you didn’t tell me any of it. How… how could I not be hurt?”0d1f671bcec12cd1

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His voice was precarious. Like someone barely holding c0ed979439 onto their sanity.ad30d3fade7ec129

Shavonne calmly removed Lewellyn’s hand from his shoulder. There was no resistance. It fell away smoothly.96b598ce0d0b4d1b

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“Lewellyn.”7ba50964a5ee4aaa

Shavonne called.1fffdaf4aacdee13

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“What is that?”ab318dbda2933d1a

The sack had stopped moving, then wriggled slightly, almost imperceptibly, then stopped again, repeating this pattern. The red ribbon tightly binding the mouth of the sack wasn’t the kind of string typically used for wrapping gifts. It was rope.30191a023bb7ee3a

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“As you can see, it’s a gift. When you receive something, you must give a gift in return. I received a cushion last time, so I thought I should give something in return, and I happened to see that.”27d6fd4086e26ae0

What was in the sack wasn’t a duck. It wasn’t a wild rabbit or a wood pigeon either. This fact was obvious, yet Lewellyn insists on calling it ‘that’. Shavonne stepped back. A shiver went down his neck.bc71a44148fdbb13

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He sat in front 25c3d995b0 of the sack and 6107997230 untied the rope binding 1ac97191a8 its mouth. When he pulled, it 2c5f6ec4cf came undone easily. His hand 87d4545c57 stung from cfbf335563 touching the 63b30230c1 rough hemp. A reddish sensation spread 4a1467c681 across his palm. Ignoring this, he b1ecdd6e02 opened the sack.c017c7b6d80bc313

Inside the opened sack, a familiar head was visible. Black, shiny, curly hair. At first glance it looked like it was clumped with grease, but upon closer inspection, that wasn’t the case. It was matted with sticky blood. He could feel trembling from inside. Intermittent sounds of someone choking back sobs could be heard. Shavonne was frozen. Neither opening nor closing, just gripping the sack tightly.f022c3968daa1763

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Lewellyn, who had c7bb09474d been watching silently, c6ff446b29 spoke.e6eb6008c4d98700

“Shall I help you?”cb275ee654ea7572

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At that voice, the trembling that had been felt even through the sack stopped. The sound of choking back sobs stopped too. Shavonne was certain this was due to the fear imprinted in ‘that thing’s’ mind. What could he have done? What could he have done to make someone terrified just from hearing his voice? Shavonne couldn’t even begin to imagine.431ec2e745764216

Shavonne answered wordlessly by opening the sack wide. Inside, as expected, was Turner. Turner’s body was all dark red with blood. It smelled fishy. Dark red clots were formed on his eyelids, nostrils, and where his dimples would be.975bb484120ff552

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Whether due to the dark bruises on his eyelids or swelling, his eyes wouldn’t open easily. His cheekbones had collapsed and his nose was broken. His lips were split, and the briefly visible gums were crushed, with nearly half of his once straight teeth missing. It was a sight too horrific to look at.da1ae0703b1d0c91

That’s when it happened. Turner’s eyes, barely opened, caught sight of Shavonne. Turner’s eyes widened.3a98f8ef50d4ccb7

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The next moment, Shavonne 47ddfbeccb saw Turner clinging to 7d4412cdf4 his feet.53cfaed413f126e9

Turner buried his face in the toe of Shavonne’s shoe. Then he rubbed against it. Every time Turner moved, his hair covered in blood did too. It was as if he was cleaning the toe of Shavonne’s shoe with his face and hair.5f5de0976ca48f4a

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Turner constantly mumbled sounds that could have been groans or screams. Mixed with crying, and perhaps because his teeth were gone or his tongue was crushed, the pronunciation was so unclear that it was impossible to understand. By the time Shavonne realized that the words he kept mumbling were “I’m sorry,” Turner was already looking up at him.94cfa0a1d6ca28e0

A face stained with tears and snot. But even those tears and snot were not enough to wash away the bloodstains covering Turner’s face. The words “Please forgive me” burst from Turner’s mouth.bb26d3b9700b0c82

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Shavonne, barely suppressing the revulsion rising to his throat, began to put Turner back into the sack. Turner wailed. “I’m sorry, please forgive me, I’m sorry…” Shavonne ignored him and pressed down hard on Turner’s head. Turner was desperate not to go in. No matter how much he was pressed down, his head sprang up.1ae0331e2b2f7e57

He managed to 5782e78574 stuff Turner into 4062bca49d the sack. To prevent 29636833eb him from da73350545 getting out, 2b1ca8228c he quickly 44555623e5 closed it b11a6cc001 and placed aa75c94668 a heavy d62fbf832d chair on 667cdd506a top. He was out 490dc7f072 of breath. Shavonne wiped 1319749bc1 his sweaty 9df8abf557 forehead with 70f7c59056 the back eaabac73a0 of his ba3fe0d183 hand. At the same ae9c019293 moment, an unexpected 73de4e6d14 smell of blood d0264fd99e stung his nose.95b48cfa93805bbf

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Startled, he saw that blood had stained his hand without him realizing. It seemed to have happened while he was pressing down on Turner’s head to put him in the sack. Shavonne immediately wiped it off. Although the stain was quickly erased, the smell of blood didn’t go away. It was nauseating. It was a stench that involuntarily made him grimace.9d1efe29b02858de

“Do you like it?”9ebc5b35ecfcb3a0

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A laughing voice e883247a3d was heard from 88f49217c5 behind. Turning around, 9325e4c696 he saw 7622cb15c7 Lewellyn grinning. With a face that 415869d241 seemed to believe without 958fb94b34 a doubt that Shavonne 0088edb7a9 would be pleased.5971cd7f07818036

Shavonne stood up and faced Lewellyn. Although anger filled his throat, he held it back. Although the desire to rebuke filled his throat, he held that back too. However, despite his superhuman patience, he couldn’t hide the agitation in his voice.f29d14e4e54691bb

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“Take him back.”1ec13b8a54174708

As Shavonne spat 334e89e993 this out, the 8e3baba37d corner of his 449b449d31 eye twitched slightly. Lewellyn tilted his d8166bcdba head. His hair fell c8ab332287 along his slender b09de8f17d jawline.01bc53fe036a1e64

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“You mean put him away where he can’t be seen?”c3469e806528206e

“Don’t pretend to not understand me. Take this person back. Right now.”b14056c86ecfa551

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Shavonne wasn’t focusing on the fact that Turner had been beaten to a pulp. Beaten to a pulp? Served him right. Being beaten to a pulp wasn’t enough. He wished he had been stabbed. He wished he had been poisoned and strangled too. He wished he had died like a fish on a cutting board, with its gills cut, scales peeled off, and entrails removed. But he hoped, he needed, the person doing it to absolutely not be Lewellyn.865ffdbdcfda3ed4

If Lewellyn gets caught for this…, then…2a06fbe5aab096b6

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Emotions welled up involuntarily. Shavonne couldn’t hold back and shouted.cd9437a7fe0d6bb2

“Lewellyn, don’t you understand? You’ve committed a crime now. A crime that can’t be fixed! Why on earth did you do such a thing…”e817f180950886b9

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“‘Why on earth’?”27f9a117f6609b41

The sentence was cut 9e33ecdba3 off.48645e05b595d392

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Shavonne was momentarily 8cd17826ba stunned by the 1c19543d5c unexpected words.Did I 6070532b6c hear wrong? Or…? Before he could make up his mind, Lewellyn’s voice rang out again. The clearly enunciated syllables pierced his ears.4468fba60b865f1c

“Why, on earth?”e11a969dcdd17fb4

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Lewellyn’s voice was sharp.33ab2aee052b8767

“I don’t understand ‘why on earth’ Mr. Shavonne didn’t tell me anything. I was hurt. I was so hurt that… every time I thought about why you did it, what circumstances made you not give me any hint, I felt like I was rolling in mud. It made me feel like I was worse than your typewriter. Like I was worse than your pillow and worse than your blanket. No matter how much I try not to, I keep feeling jealous. Of your typewriter, your pillow, your blanket… I’m jealous of them all.”e6faecc946936a11

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“…”31827532a20bdf04

“Why did you do it, Mr. Shavonne? Because I’m not worthy enough to confide in? Because it’s obvious I wouldn’t be of any help? Because I’d only get in the way? Or…”f6f0ca13361ea60a

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Lewellyn forced a smile, 25b32c84c7 pulling up the corners a121241c5e of his mouth. Be it luck or 6289dc251c misfortune, Shavonne knew that 69175b2ca1 this was an action 6ca5dd36fd for his sake.d1abdf87e68d8a63

“Are you tired of me?”5797c6cc4f531e67

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It felt like c74b1f54c4 something was stuck 1f9166b1d5 in his throat.d3bbe84a585fcf29

“Are you tired of me? Because I don’t have black hair, because I don’t have blue eyes, because I don’t have neat nails or a smooth body without scars… Is that why you did it?”b50a6d0ebe785dc1

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Absolutely not.Shavonne squeezed aeb384ff36 out his b9bc996aff voice with b5b549dd88 difficulty to 94f3ec4dce answer.58595e756b238ebb

“That’s not it.”60e44643eb58880d

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“Then what?”1f9dadc8a6c79c3c

Lewellyn was still forcing a smile. Shavonne couldn’t bear to look.a70b304390319e7b

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“Then why did you tell me not to wait, and why did you give me a cushion to hug when you’re not there? Why didn’t you stroke my hair when I slept, why didn’t you kiss me, why didn’t you hug me?”cf92d385ceb7c4a9

Lewellyn probably knew that Shavonne hid both the publishing company and the editor. He probably even knew that Shavonne switched the letters at that time to protect Turner. It was natural for Lewellyn to fester. Only Shavonne didn’t know.618a09a4b6c61c4e

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Shavonne wanted 2afdfbaf12 to clean 5cff129dfd Lewellyn. He wanted aab811fbb0 to wash ab1fb7b2fb him with 52232fdfb3 water or 124311b6de apply disinfectant, 024b6017c7 or wipe de4a3c4afc him with fd95c2066e a clean c8f41fdee5 cloth.ea02e70ab5b9ec11

But how 6f728fe144 could Shavonne 2d822318bf dare?5f7515029cf64d68

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“I was so hurt. That’s all.”5bd183054b5ff5fd

Lewellyn finished. He didn’t seem to expect Shavonne to explain himself. Shavonne was about to say something, but at that moment he couldn’t because of a rustling sound from somewhere. The sack. Shavonne only then realized that the problem with Turner was urgent.911b1ae970a52abc

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“We need to take him back.”5cc2855ff353d5fd

Shavonne said.a5f1ff9e45ba05f3

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“This man is not just anyone. I mean, he’s not the kind of person the police wouldn’t care about whether he’s kidnapped or not. This man is rich. He says his family is influential too. And he’s not the type to meekly overlook being kidnapped and assaulted. And…”688e349c46ee85d0

“Mr. Shavonne. I don’t commit crimes that can’t be fixed.”edc0505990cdf388

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Lewellyn smiled. It was impossible 4bede963a2 to tell if 2f10e9067b it was a 6cff8e20b6 genuine smile or f53e20dd4c not.abd55bb07feef457

“He’ll become a beggar. It doesn’t matter whether his family is influential or not. Even if he were royalty, it wouldn’t be a problem. He’ll give in easily.”e563e3cfd53f0911

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Surely he doesn’t mean to kill him, right?Shavonne looked at Lewellyn 8e98c7bad0 with eyes betraying his 266d798db0 anxiety.8801f9ffca8d0af5

“I’m not thinking of killing him. You said you’d leave if I killed anyone. You know that I obey any order you give.”0cdd01040e79ff41

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After finishing his explanation, Lewellyn immediately shrugged and added, “Of course, except for telling me not to wait, to sleep hugging the cushion, to take that one back, and so on.”d1de6d4fdc5a61fe

It didn’t make sense.6345b4b7794aefeb

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“Then why did you bring him here?”54b8f489f7d0153d

“He played with you, Mr. Shavonne.”496744eca613b6a4

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Lewellyn laughed. “I thought Mr. Shavonne might want to play with him too. Games are more fun when they’re reciprocal, aren’t they?”5931dbc027ebdb8d

Shavonne frowned slightly. “And after I ‘play’ with this person? What happens next?”61a655d344e2ee3a

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“Of course, I’ll play with him. I’ve even made plans for how to play with this one. What do you think? Aren’t you curious?”2e2dd0b4ce91cd5e

“No, I’m not.”3430795fdd06b81f

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Shavonne was no saint. He didn’t want to be one either. He won’t care what happens to Turner. No, he’ll rather be glad. However, he decided not to listen to how Lewellyn would ‘play’. He was sure it would upset him if he heard it.d0758f7b41d4b5a5

He looked down at the sack. Until just now, it had been twitching slightly, but now there was no particular movement. While Lewellyn’s desired ‘play’ would probably involve violence, Shavonne had no such intention. He might kick it at most, but he wouldn’t smash the face like Lewellyn did. There was only one thing Shavonne wanted to do.d1ef3eab025a69be

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He wanted f5f8409d36 to ask 7da9e7015c why.afaa842773086b64

Why did he deceive Shavonne? Why… did it have to be Shavonne? What did he hope to gain by deceiving Shavonne, who was, as Turner said, merely a ‘nameless ghostwriter’?eb43102ba4b4885e

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“I’ll make room for you. Use it.”c143fbdd8676d254

Lewellyn held out the toolbox he was holding. “Put it there,” Shavonne replied. He had no intention of using it, but it might be needed.558de7e63c18609d

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When he opened the sack, Turner appeared. No wonder he wasn’t moving; he had fainted. He wasn’t dead. There was a pulse. As he dragged out the entire body, his limbs were revealed. They were covered in blood, which had dried, turning his entire limbs black. His legs were bent at an odd angle, and his arms were stiff, either broken or something.d077a31b70c9cffb

Shavonne’s eyes twitched at the sight of blood. Lewellyn glanced at Turner and said in a voice that showed no sympathy at all, “Oh, what a shame. Should I cut his tendons for you?”0fec52cebb87b6fd

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“No.”70b4785c1297b148

“Should I pull out his fingernails and toenails for you?”6a8a9db126fb8f92

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“No.”22e5c5795c13c244

“He might scratch you.”ab86918aa144791d

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“It’s fine.”7294a3600d7b77ce

Shavonne said, “Come back in thirty minutes.” Lewellyn agreed. While Lewellyn was preparing to leave room 303, Shavonne shook Turner’s body. He didn’t wake up. He slapped his cheek. Still, he didn’t wake up. He hit him hard several times with resentment, but it was the same. Shavonne was perplexed.d413b361314a5f08

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Fortunately, Lewellyn was just about to leave the house. Shavonne stopped Lewellyn just as he was stepping out the door. Lewellyn poked his face through the not-yet-closed door. As if asking ‘What’s the matter?’, Lewellyn’s eyes shone towards Shavonne.f31577fd8126e8ed

“Um… how do I wake that up?”ad40ca5a19a785f3

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Shavonne asked. Lewellyn answered lightly 4b2f6b4c0f while putting on 3795f96823 his hat.8468338277652874

“Break one of his fingers.”f0a291aea4cc2c17

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The door closed. Soon, someone’s scream echoed loudly inside the closed door.18875f48dbfc418c

“What’s all that noise?”0ccea7fdfe3a236f

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In front of room bfe0d6d497 303. A voice cbbb2bd76d was heard 6faa27c0f8 from above. Lewellyn, who 0f12994cb4 was leaning 14698cd6fa against the b0e09132f9 door with fd190c393b his arms 0f5f76028c crossed, raised 891dea2d20 his head f20f1935b4 to identify d5f933fec0 the owner d71200ddc5 of the badbc474cb voice. It was a 83a9ebff0e familiar face. Mrs. Isadora from upstairs.92909db702f7edc4

“Kids playing.”96854a2d4eeb21fa

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Lewellyn answered.92d61cb012057fac

Mrs. Isadora said,6c832b3fa6e1fa35

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“Don’t let them play too late.”ef68a1a5acccc153

Mrs. Isadora grumbled that these days, there were too many young people playing too late, and she couldn’t get a good night’s sleep at all. She didn’t forget to threaten that because of not being able to sleep at night, her migraine that had disappeared 5 years ago was about to come back, and if it did, she would bill him for the medical expenses. Lewellyn said he would keep that in mind. Only after repeated warnings did Mrs. Isadora leave the front of room 303.56ce5a07346ed7cd

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Lewellyn watched Mrs. Isadora’s retreating figure. Only when Mrs. Isadora’s figure was completely out of sight could he turn his gaze. To the gas lamp in the corridor, to the railing of the corridor, and beyond the railing of the corridor.97e6f9348020d9f8

It was snowing.1a0bc35f6d3cfd81

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In front of the Ira Apartment, snowflakes were silently settling on the huge plane tree. One flake, two flakes, three flakes…, the slowly falling snowflakes soon became countless. The night was turning white in Bunch. A white night. It was the first snow of that winter.534164c14a6007cf

A moment b188946026 later, someone 125699d12c rushed out 30b7b82018 of room e2c76090a3 303. It was Shavonne. Shavonne, pale 466709e998 and white 3e50b2a381 after all 930d5e1073 the blood 38674042c9 drained from f4dd424cf2 his face.aa34ccc9c1feee9e

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Shavonne said he 6af0809fac had somewhere to 45ebf0cb1e go.2e34aa581011fbb9

***baf50e5bb99945d4

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The carriage stopped.ae7809a4db3a496d

On a deserted bef25f70fc night, snow was 7af852fe1d falling into a ce90b3025c dark world where c4e65dd269 the only thing a9913877ad shining was the c651f411ed light of gas 7b81de72a7 lamps. Shavonne poked e64fe4fad4 his head 8fcb69419c out of b6d971e851 the carriage 032b0fa3d8 window to caff579a9f look at 11dfd6de66 the coachman. The incessant snow settled 8319013de3 on his head, neck, a0aa2e914c and shoulders, melting coldly.f86051da2a9d6ce0

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“I can’t go any further.”24d5f595f5fdf9cc

The coachman said. The coachman’s finger pointed to the slope spread out in front of the carriage. No, more precisely, he was pointing at the snow piled on the slope.bf75d0a5385768a3

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Shavonne understood. It’s dangerous for a cheap carriage to go up and down a snow-covered slope. Is it just snow piled up? When it eventually turns into ice, it becomes even more dangerous. Even if we generously assume there’s no problem going up, there’s too high a possibility of slipping when coming down.Accidents where cheap carriages e1a6335473 overturn while running on f317e29c97 ice were not uncommon.755b58668a9f333e

As he ffe09137ce got out 6687251e34 of the dfe1b4f447 carriage, there 912bdb70d8 was a 01faf8372f crunching sound f773fd5c1b of stepping 27ed509031 on snow. The falling snow bdd3ef4e04 made his hair 863a31ed99 droop and stained 2ca23ec717 his clothes. Snow settled f54e80f016 on his ed6a68a911 exposed nape 667912f7a6 and melted. A chill seeped df40043eac into every place 004acae358 the snow touched.4c7d1e3c9ef60a51

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Shavonne handed over the b3aab50b7b carriage fare. He also 04515579c6 gave a 373d066b5b tip as 5f40a7eff9 usual. The coachman subtly 75684d030f rolled his eyes, f8e96b48f7 saying that that 1ac21e0f0c was too cheap c91f43e620 a price for 4e15a5e1a1 taking him this 4a56c71f6c far on this 11dc5c19f1 night, this winter, 109636b21f this snowy day. Before the coachman 6cc8bf7a93 could finish saying 9fcb5dd4bb that carriage fares 73021ca00d had been raised 1702203b03 recently, Shavonne silently d0311f4281 handed over all 14a0ded07e the money in 44a9aba762 his wallet. Only then did the b309eb9788 coachman smile broadly.7c2ebeda22ad20ab

Shavonne didn’t care. He couldn’t care. Whether the coachman was overcharging or not, that wasn’t what was important. Only one name was spinning dizzyingly in Shavonne’s mind. Like the snow swirling before his eyes.449fac202e8a0b43

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Fawkes.a0b8c49343dda84f

The Fawkes mansion should have been visible by now, but it wasn’t. The view was all white, obscured by the swirling snow. The snowstorm slapped Shavonne’s cheeks. His cheeks were all red from the cold. The crunching sound of snow under Shavonne’s feet as he climbed the slope was followed by the sound of snow blowing, burying it. Shavonne thought it sounded like Turner’s breathing. Not the Turner who was showing off at the his home, but the Turner who was crawling like a maggot in the sack at the Ira Apartment.7107ff6910698b5e

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― I’m sorry, please spare me, I’m sorry…f5197cd1dc0a5ded

Inside room 303. As soon as Shavonne woke him up, Turner started begging like that. He buried his face in Shavonne’s shoe tip, trouser hem, and knee, and rubbed against them. Shavonne stepped back to prevent Turner from rubbing against him. The clinging body was disgusting. Knowing that Turner would never have said ‘I’m sorry’ if he hadn’t ended up in this state, Shavonne had no intention of accepting Turner’s begging.c000ec3816396703

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But Turner was desperate. Perhaps he judged that he had a higher chance of survival by rubbing up against Shavonne, who ‘understands words’, rather than Lewellyn, who ‘doesn’t understand words’. Turner, crouched down like a stepped-on maggot, repeatedly banging his forehead on the floor. His forehead had wounds. Fresh blood began to flow on the forehead that had been only black with dried blood.0991927522f92f68

Shavonne tried to stop him. Not so much out of concern for Turner, but because of the thought that if Turner died from banging his forehead like this, Lewellyn might take the blame when he was innocent . But that’s when it happened.7110f801a41ef489

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― It was all 15f3b1e45e your friend, your friend d4a12c0187 who ordered me to 4547db2234 do it.47b8710e40cc19e3

Shavonne stopped his c14f2ac082 hand reaching out 51912fcc78 towards Turner.47095f522fe4d39d

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My friend?d2f473e024126a39

The only person Shavonne could call a friend was Doctor Fawkes. In other words, Turner’s claim was this: Doctor Fawkes ordered Turner to deceive Shavonne, to make a false confession saying ‘I love you,’ and to try to force a relationship.b34cb37bb950536a

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Nonsense.1ccae5fe95b5c378

― I understand you want to get out of this situation, but don’t drag my friend or whatever into this. It’s disgusting.37486e38f9d3c94c

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― It’s true!6d8069b72065ac7f

Turner shouted.824827723c0d1f1d

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― I swear. If this is a lie, I don’t care if I die. Yes, I don’t care if that devil pulls out all my remaining teeth. Please believe me.13be087b34dc25f5

This was Turner, who was so afraid of Lewellyn that he would have a seizure just from hearing his voice. And now this Turner was swearing, swearing to die if he was lying, that he wouldn’t care if Lewellyn pulled out all his remaining teeth.afc37cc2dc251847

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Can I believe 9c096bedd1 him?f4fe923111d878e8

Shavonne just looked down at Turner silently without showing any reaction. Turner didn’t miss that gap and shouted the rest. Every time Turner moved his lips, the dark red mass pooled in his mouth wriggled.d8e12f41a1f91d6e

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― He told me to become your lover. And to report your every move. I don’t know why. I just wanted the money…33fbd9a59798a709

― Which one?8b0c080d31ba4531

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Shavonne asked.62e5ffe220ec9853

― Which one of 2bd3bc9ef3 my friends would order 0bfef35f90 such insanity?bd35da1a4f7c182a

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― I don’t know his name. He introduced himself as Mr. F.008e98164ff80ad2

F. Strangely, he 2e807f78be knew that 990ddd544e initial.f78ff69072b390ac

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That’s when it happened. Turner suddenly asked to take out the wallet from his back pocket. He said the ‘evidence’ was there. Shavonne didn’t budge. It might be a trick. If he pounced on the opportunity when Shavonne came close, it would be a disaster.5f20eb9623400d23

Watching Shavonne not even move, Turner closed his eyes tightly and opened them again. Then he twisted his body to get the wallet out of his back pocket. He pushed it to send it flying to Shavonne’s feet. During the twisting of his body, the pain in his stiffened arms and bent legs must have been severe, as sweat beaded on Turner’s face covered in blood. Red sweat drops fell.32aaddc26df7a370

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Shavonne picked up the wallet. When he opened it, cash, checks, and a letter from Turner’s fiancée came out. Except for the fact that the wedding was a month away, nothing noteworthy was written. It was an ordinary wallet. No, it was rather an unremarkable wallet.dbed83c45fea4567

Until he 8812e0624a found a 0aaf814d3e certain note.5ab46c3190e0f2a3

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It was a familiar handwriting that couldn’t be mistaken. Shavonne wanted to believe it wasn’t true, but he wasn’t blind. The handwriting could have been forged. Yes, maybe that could be the case. But the content?3b5fe0a48548a484

The note listed things Shavonne liked and disliked in succession. With a footnote saying ‘reference’, it briefly described how he had met, dated, and broken up with his lovers so far. Decisively, it contained the plots of three novels Shavonne had written. It wasn’t the version submitted to the publisher. It was the version that Doctor Fawkes had read before submission.13ed76c2a1f8a8a3

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Shavonne’s hand holding the note turned pale white.0cb5629691516d80

‘Shall I introduce you to someone?’d3f18f23ead3d7ac

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‘He’s handsome. You only care about their faces, so you’ll surely like him.’0ec0492608e4e3d8

‘Meet him once and decide.’59e94d39b52c2504

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He recalled the day 7831bdbeac when Doctor Fawkes had 17a789a869 insisted on introducing someone. He had believed 98b1bbce20 without doubt that f04ef9f2d7 it had been f07598e162 a gesture of ee4177e836 friendship, but thinking 8469d0566e that it was 05fff18071 bait to receive 079d6b0aab reports on his 497e6aaa08 every move made ff3320a416 his throat close c4a856573a up. It felt 7f14241a0a like he 75b6924ecc was out e072f31127 of breath.af46d415f8fafe0b

Has this been 251c35115f the first time?b5e2bb3d195c240a

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If not… since when?64246b0c28107f07

db74c91b364d44df

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