C | Chapter 4.3 | Crack | Crack in the wall

Leo, with a fork in his mouth, mumbled as Ian approached. Ian lightly tapped his forehead with the water pitcher.

“I told you not to use that word.”
“What’s the problem? I mean, it really looks good on you. Or is it that you look good because you’re wearing it?”

Grumbling, Leo resumed picking at his salad with his fork.

“It really suits you. I like it. You should wear it at home. Just for me.”

With that, Ian was tempted to find a job that didn’t require a black apron and bow tie. He was about to tell Leo to be quiet and eat when the Revenant flicked a fork, sending a piece of tomato from his plate flying at Leo’s forehead.

“Ah! What the hell was that for?”

Leo rubbed his forehead angrily. Anyone would have. The Revenant’s face showed no hint of a joke.

“Don’t say he looks cute.”
“…W-what?”
“Ian told you he doesn’t like it. If you’re too stupid to learn, at least be polite.”
“…What?”

Leo looked like he was about to leap up to fight, but Ian held him back.

“Idiot. Just eat your food.”

Leo pointed indignantly at his forehead.

“But he hit me here!”
“Well, maybe you should’ve stopped when I told you to.”
“So, you’re taking his side?”
“No.”

Not exactly. He just didn’t want Leo actually to pick a fight with the Revenant. He had a feeling the Revenant wouldn’t hesitate to “accept the challenge” and wouldn’t stop until satisfied.

Idiot. Think before you pick a fight. Just two days ago, you dislocated your shoulder.

In that sense, the Revenant’s comment about Leo lacking learning ability was a fitting assessment.

“If you start a fight here, I’ll get in trouble, okay? This is my workplace, remember?”
“…Fine, I’ll hold back as long as you’re not taking his side.”

Leo grumbled, reluctantly picking up his fork again.

The Revenant, who’d been watching their exchange, suddenly asked,

“How long have you worked here?”
“About half a year. Why?”
“Did you know each other from then?”
“Who, Leo? No. He was my roommate back in college.”

The Revenant’s brows furrowed.

“His name is Leo, huh… I see.”

Then, he suddenly smiled. Both Ian and Leo, sensing a change in expression, instinctively tensed up. Even a slight change in the Revenant’s expression was reason for caution.

“What exactly ‘makes sense’ to you?”
“Ever thought about quitting?”

His question changed the subject entirely. Trying to keep calm with the Revenant’s abrupt shifts, Ian asked,

“Quitting what?”
“This job.”
“What are you talking about? If I quit, I’ll have no income.”
“Not true. You have easier ways to make money.”

Ian narrowed his eyes at the Revenant.

“So, are you saying…”
“You know exactly what I mean.”

He was suggesting Ian could return to hacking.

He would know. Georg had overheard their conversation at Tim Hogan’s studio.

“I try not to do things that’d get me chased by the cops. I only do it when I have no other choice.”
“Are you that hard up?”

Ian looked around the restaurant, deciding that the sparse number of customers allowed him to chat a bit longer.

“When my stepfather died, all we had left was the house, and my mother started getting sick. Earning a living took priority over school fees.”

Leo gaped at Ian with sympathy, his fork dropping a piece of spinach pie on the white tablecloth, leaving a stain that made Ian sigh softly.

“So you don’t really enjoy working here.”

Ian shook his head.

“Well, it’s not all bad. It’s tiring physically, but I don’t have to think too hard, and my boss is nice.”
“What about everyone else? Are you getting along okay?”
“It’s not too bad. But I don’t understand why you’re asking.”
“Maybe you should quit. That way, you wouldn’t have to listen to comments like ‘the apron looks cute on you.’”

The Revenant’s suggestion, like his other acts of charity, felt excessive. He wasn’t just helping; he was now interfering with Ian’s part-time job.

“You’re the one who took me in when I had nowhere to go. If anyone knows how much I need money right now, it’s you, isn’t it?”

The Revenant smiled softly.

“If you need money, sell your laptop.”

Ian couldn’t tell if that was a joke or a serious suggestion.

“I’d be lucky to get a few hundred bucks for it. Not something I’d say to the guy who spent twenty thousand on it for me, though.”
“Then I’ll get you another one.”
“What?”
“How about a house?”
“Hey, what are you…?”

Before Ian could tell if he was serious, Leo jumped to his feet.

“What’s that supposed to mean? You’re going to buy Ian a house? If anyone’s buying him a house, it’s me! You need to back off!”

Ian frowned and sighed.

“Leo, didn’t I just tell you not to pick fights? Calm down.”

But it was too late. The staff in the dining area and at the counter were already glancing at their table. He’d told them before that he was definitely not gay, mostly to fend off the annoying guys who occasionally hit on him here. Now that was about to go out the window.

“If you let me, I’ll buy you one. You can pick whatever place you like.”

With the situation growing out of control, Ian grimaced, while Leo began to point and yell.

“If anyone’s buying him a house, it’s me! Who do you think you are, hitting on my boyfriend? Is charity supposed to be like this? Since when is flirting with someone else’s boyfriend considered charity?”
“Quiet.”

The Revenant tilted his wrist. With a swish, a salad knife he’d somehow picked up flew past Leo’s ear, landing on the floor behind his chair.

“….”

Silence settled over the table. A drop of blood appeared on Leo’s earlobe before falling.

Then, the Revenant picked up his fork lightly.

“I’ve heard they used forks to torture prisoners during the ‘60s. Never tried it, but I know how. Curious?”

The tomato incident had been a mere jest. Seeing the Revenant seriously holding a fork created a truly menacing atmosphere. At that moment, he looked like someone who could kill, not just torture, with a fork.

Ian, genuinely worried for Leo now, firmly gripped his shoulder, signaling him to stay silent. Thankfully, Leo didn’t lack learning ability entirely; he remained quiet.

“….”
“If you’re not curious, stay quiet.”

The Revenant finally set down the fork, habitually wiping his mouth with a napkin, before turning back to Ian.

“I’m serious. Think about it.”

Ian knew the question was pointless, but he couldn’t resist.

“So, if I accept this house, you’re not going to show up uninvited whenever you please… right? What’s the reason for all this?”
“I just want you to know that some people help others without expecting anything in return. That’s the spirit of charity.”
“Charity usually targets a general audience. I’m not just anyone to you, am I?”
“Do you think you’re special to me?”
“Yes.”

The answer slipped out faster than expected. The Revenant tilted his head.

“You don’t seem to have figured anything out about me yet.”
“Not yet. But I do have one question.”

Ian’s palm began to sweat, and he subconsciously wiped it on his apron.

“Did we… sleep together?”

The Revenant seemed genuinely surprised, a faint smile stretching his well-shaped lips, while Leo gasped audibly.

“What are you talking about? You and him… what?”

Thump!

This time, a fork flew toward Leo’s opposite ear, and he quickly shut his mouth. The Revenant spoke.

“No, we didn’t.”

Ian looked intently into the Revenant’s eyes. His blue eyes were like ice—clear enough to reflect everything yet impossible to see through.

“I asked you if you wanted to sleep with me.”

The Revenant didn’t deny it.

“You did.”
“Then we probably did.”
“You were fifteen at the time. Surely you remember that much?”
“Fifteen?”
“Precisely fifteen and two months.”

Ian frowned. Fifteen and two months. That would have been when his stepfather was still alive, during the short period when his life had been peaceful.

I knew him back then?

“You said you were a foreigner. You were in this country at that time?”
“There were… circumstances.”

The Revenant’s identity became even more puzzling. After a moment of silent contemplation, Ian spoke again.

“A house… seems excessive, even for charity.”
“Not at all. I have plenty of money, and it’s not just a house I’m offering.”
“So, if I accept the house, you’ll give me more? What? How much? In what way?”

The Revenant’s answer was simple yet left Ian reeling.

“Anything.”
“Why?”

Why? He only knew the guy’s name.

“Because I decided to.”
“Who decided that?”
“I did.”

This answer came slowly. For the first time, Ian sensed hesitation in him.

“Why?”

Pressed by Ian’s question, the Revenant finally spoke.

“A touch of guilt. That’s the truth, for now.”

Guilt. That implied the Revenant had done something wrong to him.

“What did you do to me?”
“Nothing.”
“Then why feel guilty?”
“Not doing anything can still be a reason for guilt.”
“Not doing anything? Then, why…?”

Unable to understand, Ian questioned again, and the Revenant raised his hands.

“Let’s stop here. I hope this was enough of an apology for this morning. Are you still upset?”

Ian realized once more that the Revenant was indeed a bad adult. This whole conversation wasn’t an apology. He’d purposefully led Ian down a path he couldn’t resist. He knew Ian’s frustration would drive him to ask, only to throw a small clue that Ian couldn’t leave unresolved. Now, Ian couldn’t leave the Revenant. Not until he knew who he was, what he’d done, or hadn’t done.

“……”

Ian bit down on his lip, struggling for words. The Revenant watched him, his gaze piercing.