UCT Ch 1

I regretted it. The regret was all the more bitter because it was too late.

My consciousness flickered perilously like an old light bulb. The musty dampness of the solitary confinement cell seeped into my bones. I blinked my crusted eyes with difficulty and asked myself,

‘How long have I been locked up here?’

Days? Months? Maybe it felt like just a moment. My muddled brain had long lost the sense of time and direction. My thoughts spun like the tail of a crashing airplane.

When fighting in the air, there are times when you lose your sense of direction. Up in the high sky, there’s nothing but clouds. So, many pilots get confused whether they’re ascending or descending, often ending up crashing into the ground with their plane. Now, confined in solitary, I was in a similar predicament. No, my whole life had been like that. Hadn’t I lived chasing only one thing, unaware whether I was rising or falling?

The glory of Arke. The glory of the family. And the glory for my name to be remembered in history.

Values I once thought were everything in life. But they were all vain and useless. I thought, huddling my numb limbs.

‘If only I could turn back time.’

I knew better than anyone that it was an empty, unattainable wish. Through countless aerial battles, I had realized that all human lives are the same.

Perhaps I’ve lived this long because I’ve taken so many of those single lives from others. Then, wouldn’t it be fair if I died at least a few dozen more times? I picked up an unfunny jest in my mind and closed my eyes.

🌷🌷🌷

Time in solitary confinement flowed endlessly. No, it stagnated and rotted. Since when, I couldn’t feel my left hand; suddenly, it felt nothing. Even trying to move my fingers, they didn’t budge like a piece of wood.

The thought of never flying again scared me, then made me laugh. Even in this situation, thinking about flying was so absurd it could drive me mad.

When they gouged out one of my left eyes, I couldn’t think at all, but now I was worried about flying. It was ridiculous. Moreover, after countless hours of torture, my other eye was also beginning to fail. I wondered whether I’d lose my sight or my life first. If I had to bet, I’d put my money on the latter.

While I was indulging in such useless fantasies, cold footsteps approached the cell door. Slow, deliberate, growing clearer, like the rhythmic swing of a massive pendulum. The taste of dry, cold lead seeped into my mouth.

‘Parnas.’

Thanks to mind-melding, I could guess the man’s presence without seeing him.

Raiel Parnas. My subordinate and comrade. Soon to be the first marshal of the newly established air force. The leader of the ‘Golden Eagle Knights’. He was the one who trapped me in this pit.

After sending only his lackeys to torture me for a while, it seemed he had a change of heart.

Parnas’s rhythmic footsteps stopped in front of the cell door. With a sharp metallic sound, the door opened. In my upside-down vision, I saw black shoes. Seeing the meticulously polished tips of those shoes, I couldn’t help but chuckle.

Yes. Even when Parnas was a rookie pilot, he hated having anything like oil or dirt on his plane. It was strangely amusing that the man I remembered was still there. I laughed with my mouth full of blood.

“Parnas. I didn’t expect you to grace this humble place. Did you miss me that much?”

Though I couldn’t see his face as he bowed his head, I could sense the contempt in him. His voice trembled with anger.

“I’ve heard you’ve been stubbornly resisting.”

“Stubbornly resisting? If you tortured me for a month and I still didn’t answer, doesn’t it mean I really don’t know? Let’s be honest, friend. Have you seen anyone endure the torture from the royal mind-melders like I did?”

“That arrogant bastard.”

I drank in Parnas’s anger like fine wine, laughing continuously. My throat, already hoarse, made a wheezing sound.

Mind-melders and their mind-melding abilities. A psychic power passed down only to the royal family and a few noble houses of the Arke Empire, a source of pride and weapon. Though it only worked between mind-melders, it greatly enhanced their organizational power. Noble children of the Arke Empire had to hone their mind-melding abilities from childhood. The training was excruciating, but the higher you climbed, the more you could achieve. Forcing open the mind of someone who had blocked the mind-melding channel, brainwashing, or even subjecting someone to unimaginable pain in a hellish hallucination.

I endured the torture from the best mind-melders of the royal family. But I didn’t give them a single piece of information they wanted.

Thud. Thud.

Parnas, filled with venom, tapped my forehead with the tip of his shoe. Old blood stained the clean shoe. He barely suppressed his rage as he spoke.

“Tell me quickly where the prince is. Traitor. If you don’t answer, you won’t even have the freedom to die.””I told you. I don’t know where that kid is.”

“Don’t give me that crap. Fernand. All the mind-melder reports say is that you keep resisting. If you really didn’t know, you would’ve let down all your guards.”

“Can’t even read the mind of a compliant prisoner? Shouldn’t those mind-melders lose their royal tags? They’re pretty pathetic.”

Thud. Thud.

The foot that was poking at me suddenly stopped. A brief silence. Then, a voice rough like sandpaper echoed in the cell.

“From the first time I saw you, I knew you had a unique talent for pissing people off.”

He turned his foot and firmly stepped on my mutilated left hand. This wasn’t the imaginary pain from mind-melding but real, raw pain from the flesh. It hurt so damn much I wanted to cry, but my tear ducts no longer worked. A beastly howl escaped from my throat, like I’d been shot. While I groaned, Parnas kept muttering in anger.

“You unlucky bastard. Your family was full of insufferable pride, but you were unparalleled even among them. The white hawk of the skies, the ace of aces. Your arrogance was truly laughable.”

“…”

“But there’s a limit to arrogance. Did you dare to plot treason against His Majesty?”

“…”

“To underestimate His Majesty’s absolute mind-melding ability, the power to see through people’s hearts? Did you think he wouldn’t know?”

“…”

“Traitor rat.”

He spat on my face. I felt no insult; my mind was blank.

I still don’t regret planning to assassinate Dietrich. He was a madman even more than his father, the previous emperor. Killing him was the only way for Arke to survive, to break the chain of tragedy passed down through the royal family. Now, I only regret not succeeding in that plan. In that sense, I am indeed a sinner for not killing Dietrich. Parnas kept taunting me.

“Did you plan to kill the emperor and become the next one? Duke Lowell?”

“…”

“…Ha. Was the engagement with Princess Marianne for that purpose too?”

The sudden mention of Princess Marianne’s name took my breath away.

Could it be, does he already know? That I entrusted Prince Tersion to her. That by now, that child should be in Bringerton Kingdom, not here.

But contrary to my worries, there was no sign that Parnas had caught on. He continued his monologue in self-satisfaction.

“Well, whether you wanted to be emperor or not, it’s all over now. Once you die, the Lowell lineage will end completely.”

“…”

“Oh. Didn’t they tell you? Your siblings, your young nephews and nieces, they’ve all been executed.”

“…”

“What?”

“Those little ones were crying, hanging on the execution posts; it was quite pitiful. I didn’t feel good about it. Really. But there was no choice. We can’t have rebels among the mind-melders. It’s the same logic as cutting off a diseased root.”

My nephews. Aya and Harriot.

Upon hearing the word ‘executed,’ my mind went pitch black.

I couldn’t hear a single word of Parnas’s further prattle. The Lowell family, known for having mind-melding skills second only to the royal family. That’s why their children were dealt with. To cut out any potential seeds of vengeance.

‘For such a petty reason…’

Ah. Ah.

With that word, something inside me collapsed like a dam breaking. It shattered.

My fading vision turned red. Everything around was blood-red.

Still with my left hand under his foot, I muttered.

“…The children were innocent.”

I pictured my young nephews laughing and playing in front of me. My siblings and I were prepared to take full responsibility for the rebellion, but the children were innocent. They were just innocent three or four-year-olds.

Even if they had the potential to become mind-melders, to kill children who had yet to manifest their powers…

I shivered with rage at the emperor’s madness and cruelty, mumbling incoherently.

“Oh? Then I did well to kill the prince.”

“What?”

Parnas’s voice suddenly sharpened.

He must have been shocked to hear the prince was dead.

‘Yes.’

‘Despair more.’

Now that I’ve heard my whole family has been executed, I have nothing left to lose.

“…Tersion. It’s useless to keep asking me where that child is. I killed him.”

“…You bastard, that’s an absurd lie-.”

“You yourself said I wanted to become the emperor. Yes, I killed Dietrich and tried to become the next emperor. Why would I keep a prince who would get in my way?”

“Where are you coming up with such an obvious lie-!”

“Are you curious?”

For the first time, I opened my mind-melding channel to Parnas.

“Look with your own eyes.”

🌷🌷🌷

When I looked up, it was a sight to behold.

The face of the man in his well-tailored air force uniform and single-lens eyepiece was drenched in sweat. He had lost his composure hearing that the prince he so desperately sought was dead.

“I put a bullet in the prince’s forehead and dumped his body in the sea off the coast of Blood Sea. If you want to find the body, you might want to send out a submarine.”

“You, you… you madman-.”

“…Parnas. If you’re suspicious, look into my memories then.”

After much hesitation, Parnas immediately opened his mind-melding channel and entered my mind.

I showed him one scene.

The scene where I shot Tersion.

It was a hastily fabricated false memory, but it was detailed enough to fool Parnas. False memories and real memories can be easily distinguished. Only skilled mind-melders could create slightly more convincing false memories.

And I, I was one hell of an excellent mind-melder.

Soon, Parnas’s bewilderment and despair flowed into my mind-melding channel.

I drank in that despair like fine wine, chuckling.

‘Yes.’

‘Despair more, Parnas.’

‘Because you’ll never get what you want.’

The mind-melding ended, and Parnas immediately drew a pistol from his holster.

“To kill the only heir to the throne…”

“…Really? The offspring of that filthy incest-.”

Bang.

Before I could finish my insult to the royal family, a single gunshot echoed in the cell.

It sounded distant, like from afar.

The muzzle flashed, making a clean hole in my temple.

With that, my life simply ended. Instant death.

🌷🌷🌷

I regretted it.

I regretted the life I had lived, born as the son of the Duke of Arke, living to serve the emperor loyally. I regretted trusting Parnas as a loyal aide, I regretted the days I was obsessed with the number of enemy planes I shot down. The empty titles like the world’s best fighter pilot. Why hadn’t I realized sooner that they were meaningless in the face of death?

I worried about the safety of the rest of the White Hawk Knights who followed me.

But there was one regret that stood out the most.

‘Tersion.’

The boy who begged not to be abandoned.

The thought of not keeping my promise to him overwhelmed me with regret.

‘Sorry.’

The desperate, tender feelings I never felt even when killing or losing countless people in the sky burst within me. The only consolation as I died was knowing I had entrusted the child to a trusted friend.

Prince, even those with deep wounds can find happiness.

They can dare to live happily. So please, live a life not obsessed with vain fame like mine, but a simple life with those you love.

Goodbye.