SMFC | Chapter 38

Sometimes, Yoo Haeon felt like a child, nervous after saying something he shouldn’t have. Other times, it seemed like his unspoken words left his heart so parched and heated that it boiled over, causing a ruckus inside him.

This peculiar “symptom” grew worse with time. Now, simply breathing in Lee Soo’s presence made his throat burn. Startled by how lukewarm water could feel icy, Haeon clicked his tongue softly, swept his hair back, and stood up from his chair.

Lee Soo, who had been lazily watching the view outside the window with just his eyes, turned his head at the sound of movement. His hair swung softly, tracing delicate arcs in the air. As Haeon gazed at the strands, he caught himself imagining a kiss at their tips—whether it was reverence, unhidden affection, or something else entirely, he couldn’t tell. Keeping his voice steady, he said,

“I’m stepping out for a bit. I just remembered something I needed to buy.”

“At this hour? Hmm, you’re going alone, right?”

“Yes.”

Lee Soo didn’t seem to mind Haeon leaving, but the idea of him going out alone late at night clearly made him uneasy. The mix of concern and reluctance in Lee Soo’s expression made Haeon’s heart stir in a peculiar way.

It felt as if he’d become a reed swaying wildly in a passing breeze. He didn’t like the metaphor, even if it fit perfectly. With a furrowed brow, Haeon glanced at Lee Soo, who gave a resigned smile and, like a parent fussing over their child, handed him a phone.

“Take this with you,” he said before turning back to the window.

Lee Soo’s small, round head bobbed as he peered outside, seemingly captivated by whatever lay beyond the glass. Watching him, Haeon couldn’t quite pinpoint the origin of the warm affection welling up in his chest.

Just as Lee Soo seemed fully engrossed in the view, he suddenly turned around and locked eyes with Haeon, his slender gaze sharp. The look startled Haeon, making him flinch, but then Lee Soo broke into a soft laugh.

“Did you have something to say?”

If Lee Soo asked why he was staring, Haeon wouldn’t know what to answer. Licking his lips nervously, he sighed and let the tension drain from his shoulders.

“…No, nothing.”

“Hmm, really? Got it.”

Lee Soo nodded as if satisfied with the answer and promptly turned back around, as though the exchange had never happened. The blanket draped over him shifted slightly, brushing softly against his pale feet and legs.

Haeon found himself staring blankly at the blanket’s subtle movement, watching how it stroked Lee Soo’s skin like a gentle whisper. Then, as if struck by a sudden thought, Lee Soo perked up, turned his head, and waved cheerfully.

“Be careful out there, Healer Yoo Haeon. I’ll stay up and wait for you.”

His words made it sound so natural, so obvious, that he would be here waiting when Haeon returned. Feeling the weight of those words, Haeon opened his mouth to reply but couldn’t find the right words. Instead, he simply nodded deeply.

“…I’ll be back.”

“Yep. Be careful—watch out for the roads, cars, and people. You know the drill.”

Lee Soo’s playful tone and mischievous wink drew a soft laugh from Haeon, who nodded again, his lips curving into a faint smile.

***

When Yoo Haeon returned to the dorm, the first thing he saw upon opening the front door was Lee Soo pressed up against the window. Whatever charm the unimpressive, ordinary night view held, Lee Soo seemed utterly captivated, his gaze fixed unwaveringly on the scene outside.

Even so, Lee Soo somehow noticed Haeon’s arrival. Without looking away from the window, he lifted a hand high in greeting.

“You’re back? What did you buy?”

“Soap bubbles.”

Lee Soo, who had been mid-motion, froze at the unexpected response. He quickly turned his head to look at Haeon with a curious expression. For the first time since Haeon entered, Lee Soo’s eyes truly focused on him, prompting a faint smile as Haeon held out the soap bubbles.

Lee Soo took the soap bubbles eagerly, a small chuckle escaping as he alternated his gaze between Haeon and the toy in his hand.

“Soap bubbles? Should I blow them while taking a bath? Or on the rooftop?”

The remark made Haeon momentarily bristle, almost blurting out, What age do you think I am? But he held back, knowing that saying it would only reinforce the image of him as a teenager in Lee Soo’s mind. Instead, he simply shook his head.

Lee Soo, propping his chin on his hand, watched Haeon’s soft, swaying hair before turning his attention to the bubble-blowing device. Do they still sell things like this? He muttered under his breath, his tone laced with mild amazement as he read the instructions.

Oblivious to how firmly he gripped the small toy—something clearly meant for children—Lee Soo appeared oddly endearing. Haeon noticed this but didn’t bring it up, choosing instead to quietly observe Lee Soo with his slightly lowered, softened gaze.

In those pale hands, accustomed only to holding thin cigarettes or protective talismans, the toy looked strangely out of place. It stirred a peculiar thought in Haeon: I’d like to put something I chose into those hands more often.

Whether it was an expensive jewel or a stick of cotton candy from a street vendor, it didn’t matter—so long as it wasn’t a cigarette or a talisman. Not something harmful to his body, nor something meant to protect others at his own expense. Anything else would do.

As Lee Soo raised his eyebrows and murmured occasional oohs while reading the instructions, Haeon found himself entertained just watching him. To avoid disturbing Lee Soo, Haeon silently pulled out a chair and sat down. Noticing the spirits that had quietly appeared beside Lee Soo, he pressed a finger to his lips in a gesture to silence them.

The spirits bobbed in the air as if nodding in agreement, their attention focused on Lee Soo as he carefully inserted the batteries into the bubble machine. Though they lacked eyes, noses, or mouths, it was obvious they were utterly captivated by him.

After all, no presence in this space could possibly ignore the person sitting there, smiling faintly as he fiddled with a child’s toy. It was an image of innocence and beauty that even the most clichéd romance novel wouldn’t dare to depict.

Lee Soo, oblivious to the sentimental, old-fashioned thoughts swirling in Haeon’s mind, continued to busily tinker with the toy. Watching his long fingers move so deftly stirred a ticklish feeling in Haeon’s chest. He wrinkled his nose at the sensation and finally spoke up, explaining his purchase.

“…I heard some people blow soap bubbles when they quit smoking, you know, to keep their mouths busy. Others eat candy, but you don’t like candy, so—”

“So you went out this late just to buy soap bubbles?”

Lee Soo cut him off with a voice tinged with amusement, leaving Haeon to trail off awkwardly and nod.

“To take responsibility,” Haeon admitted softly. “I told Hunter Ryu Leesoo to quit smoking, so I figured I should help you stick to it.”

Episode 38 (Continued)

Lee Soo laughed, his shoulders shaking slightly, at the word responsibility, which felt oddly out of place in this playful exchange. His lips, pale with a hint of blue save for the soft blush of his inner skin, parted repeatedly to utter faint exclamations of “Amazing, amazing.”

Haeon couldn’t quite guess what sentences lay hidden behind those words, but if it were Lee Soo, he felt certain they wouldn’t be anything bad. With this relaxed thought, Haeon’s gaze lingered on him.

Lee Soo’s laugh was light and clear, like wind brushing through rustling landscapes, but it carried a faint chill that prickled the back of Haeon’s throat. Unconsciously touching his neck as if to ease the sensation, Haeon blinked, his long lashes fluttering.

Each time his eyelids moved, the image of Lee Soo blurred and sharpened, and it struck Haeon as oddly sweet—so sweet that he didn’t know why.

Haeon, who had been absentmindedly brushing his fingers over his lips and the table, suddenly reached for a cookie, as if spurred by an unnameable urgency. His untouched mouth felt strangely sweet, as if it had just exchanged confessions of love. He needed to eat something actually sweet to make sense of the sensation.

Even as he nibbled on the cookie, Haeon’s eyes stayed fixed on Lee Soo—on his faintly flushed, translucent cheeks, the fox-like curve of his narrowed eyes, and the smooth arc of his lips, like the crescent moon.

Lee Soo, after laughing for quite a while, leaned forward and gently blew a bubble. A small puff of his breath gave life to transparent, shimmering bubbles, which floated up softly into the air.

The bubbles swayed gently, their glimmer a borrowed fragment of someone’s breath. Watching them oddly tightened Haeon’s throat, and he swallowed the saliva pooling under his tongue, thick with the taste of sweetness.

The bubbles, glistening brightly and transparently, were popped one by one by the spirits before they could fall to the ground.

Neither Lee Soo nor Haeon paid any mind to cleaning up the remnants of the bubbles that reached the floor. Lee Soo’s focus remained on blowing more bubbles, his lips pursed lightly, while Haeon alternated his gaze between the delicate bubbles and Lee Soo.

The force of Lee Soo’s breath, stronger than expected, sent the bubbles flying faster than intended. Haeon suddenly felt like his eyes were growing dry, a strange and fleeting thought.

If life could flow on forever like this, Haeon thought, he wouldn’t mind. Even if he achieved nothing in life, even if he died forgotten, it wouldn’t matter. He just wanted this unremarkable, silly routine to repeat forever.

If only I could keep giving you little gifts, and you could use them freely, cluttering up our shared home. If only I could quietly watch you be happy, and at the end of the day, glance at the clock and say, It’s time for bed; let’s clean up now.

I want nothing. Or maybe, I want too much.

If I said this to Lee Soo, he’d laugh and say it’s easy. He’d say it’s not something that needs wishes or pleading to make happen—it’s just a simple thing.

And if I heard him say that, what kind of face should I make? Should I smile and say, You’re right? Or should I challenge him and say, But someday, you’ll die so easily, won’t you?

Caught in thoughts neither sorrowful nor joyful, Haeon reached out and lightly flicked a bubble with his nail, popping it. Without looking at Lee Soo, he asked in a quiet voice,

“…When we wake up tomorrow, let’s go to the rooftop and blow bubbles. I’ll buy another set for myself so we can do it together.”

Lee Soo, hearing the oddly subdued tone, responded with a simple agreement. At those words, Haeon swallowed dryly, his gaze taking in Lee Soo, the halo of shimmering light surrounding him, and the spirits swaying softly nearby.