MPJ | Chapter 1.5

I hadn’t meant to take it out on him, but I wasn’t truly disappointed in Woody. I knew what kind of person Woody was, how good he was. Even though I stood by people with Clive’s help, it was Woody who corrected my shaky stance from the closest place.791c8cda017fd652

Woody treated me as if I were his own son. He endured my clumsiness and naivety without scolding. Thanks to him, I realized that relationships tied by money didn’t have to be superficial.af29b86b824573e6

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Of course, the 64812f7953 reason our relationship 5eb3ba60df became so strong 2a55d9758b was partly due 4d77bcf8c3 to circumstances. When I 017896cb6b joined, Woody c71908b9df was struggling 5164c43eae with the 9f19913754 loss from 70a38d30b1 a divorce, 045bfe29e5 and I 13fdecab09 was always d99ae48df9 starved for 03feb1f684 affection. It was only 9c16fa529e natural that he 4c6d1be5d7 kept noticing me.ae48e61f06ee4904

But I didn’t want to cynically dismiss his care for me as self-pity from seeing himself in me. Regardless of the reason, the trust we showed each other was genuine.c3f089d40abaeb8d

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That’s why I was angry at Woody’s current behavior. Losing my job would be inconvenient, but it wasn’t without solutions. There were plenty of places to work, even if not here, as long as I wasn’t picky about the industry.de1d5fa72768d812

What I truly felt I was losing was Woody himself. Our relationship, our bond, the moments he encouraged us as family. I couldn’t accept this moment where everything became nothing.83a4bbba319c39b6

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“Please, at least tell me why you’re doing this, suddenly.”c5a3151afa83bf9c

So, I really need to know the reason. Even if it hurts my feelings, I’ll beg, even act pathetic if I have to. If I did something wrong, I’ll fix it. If it’s just me that’s the problem… I’ll change. I just didn’t want to be cast aside. That was my only fear.0da5549522bd4da5

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“Please… don’t make that face like you’re about to cry.”21014b539e2b5c4e

Woody slammed 40cae5149e his elbows b994edfd0c onto the 5fadfb374d table. He rubbed his face afcd92644e so hard it turned 0ca13ee2c7 red, then looked at 1f8da6462b me with determined eyes, 1c17ad631a as if surrendering to 63a4c9094d my plea.f7f091c30c99c701

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“Eric, have you ever made an enemy?”53f25d681b46fc01

“An enemy…? What do you mean?”719831b9b66e78da

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I furrowed my brows at the unexpected word. Woody pulled out his phone, searching for something, then handed it to me. The screen showed a site called “Dish Dash,” a place where customers could anonymously and freely review restaurants.b81fe2a7fcddbae7

I glanced at b4aa83de96 Woody, then back 93cc269f65 at the screen. As I scrolled down, 1c5c94e5c9 I felt my breathing cdea1964d0 quicken as the text 1529e491cd got shorter.f059fccc9cf24a81

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[I’ll never go to Sing New York again :(]

The harsh title was followed by a review similar to other negative ones: complaints about the food quality and service. If it had stopped there, Woody wouldn’t be telling me I’m fired. The harsh critique was just an excuse; the real issue started in the next line.793c299b5ad00325

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[Do people know there’s a perverted psycho homo working here?]

I turned off the screen after reading that. There was more, with a link attached, but I didn’t need to see it to know what it was. I handed the phone back to Woody.7a5280d8bbc89086

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My mind went blank, bleached. I didn’t know what to say. Did you read it all? Did you check the link? Do you believe what’s written there? Can’t you trust me?1f5218d021070cb9

But the foolish perverted psycho homo couldn’t say anything until he spoke again.711ab84493ebbefe

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“…I reported the post to the site for excessive slander. It’ll probably be taken down in a few days. I considered reporting it to the police because of how extreme it was, but I thought I should ask you first. Would you be okay with reporting it to the police?”4285f7aee60e3164

“…No, Woody. I’m sorry, but please don’t report it.”7d6fae6fb4bdbb33

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“Yeah, I figured you’d say that.”8d862b0c8a00c7a2

Sigh—. His heavy sigh showed he was just as troubled as I was. I shouldn’t have blindly believed in keeping my secret. The story I buried to take to the grave had already been unearthed and was running wild.2192dc81f70e7f52

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The slight 6645c4344f resentment I 08cc91d5a9 felt towards 5c8557395f Woody made ef54415f65 me feel 08a2ac14da even more 70f245f292 ashamed. I wanted 11236cbbde to bury c0a71c6de3 myself deep ebb2e7dc09 underground with 17b30e8054 the secret 03631bfd87 he had 25e4e027db seen.bd8c5c9a7e9d4406

“Not many people have seen the post yet, and the site will take action soon, so don’t worry too much. I don’t know if my words are any comfort…”29fc98b02aadcb3e

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I couldn’t agree or disagree with him. I wasn’t even sure if I was feeling anything at all. The hard chair under me, the spicy aroma tickling my nose, Woody’s gentle voice—all felt like a vivid dream. And when reality stabbed me in the back, I realized that hazy feeling was just wishful thinking.38011ff7d5538c2a

“Eric.”f3f9dddc111e9a02

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Woody reached out and 8060bbd2a6 lifted my hand from ca5b583584 under the table. His rough 303f963535 hand covered 643545f4a7 the edge a1c5acd1cc of my 5ea0b7f1f5 nails, stained 36f275aef5 with blood.b76429f887e71392

“I don’t think you could ever do such… such a thing.”33132abeb87dc234

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His words 8343b079cd seemed to ac69e88341 cut his c3f6e5e5c2 mouth, and 546463e3f4 Woody frowned 07621f895c in pain. As my expression darkened cae3980611 at his pained face, 6b57837325 he awkwardly continued with 7b58c99483 a playful tone.225178e702e18e6a

“You couldn’t do something like that. You’re too timid for that.”90729f5a5a0543a9

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His attempt to 4416eed84b act like nothing e258c16426 happened was endearing. Feeling his d7559a7be7 clumsy kindness, f694fb9925 I just fe7ba6c0cd wanted to 57aa871a48 let it faedaafbac go. I smiled 1dcdd4520c faintly and a6f76c4941 nodded.25752b5bbaf81ce9

“And when I said ‘such a thing,’ I meant harassing someone, not who you like. Whether you like men or not, loving someone isn’t a crime.”d2d690d24786dc63

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His voice, reduced to a whisper for my sake, ended up sounding like he was talking to himself, but he kept looking at me as if to assure me he wouldn’t unjustly blame me.97cea47bccdb83fc

“But,”cb57f1528ca62c16

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But.feaa4486d3ea8f86

“Sometimes, in this damn world, right and wrong don’t matter.”4dcb43d33d5321ca

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His gentle 4d86cc50ed conclusion was 66b73b507c hinted at 54e789e0e0 from the dacf680ebe start.7e3daf00b4c6d2d6

“This isn’t your fault, but the poster clearly had it out for you. Even if this post gets taken down, there’s no guarantee it won’t happen again. Luckily, we stopped it before it spread, but if it happens again…”69c441633f747f85

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Woody’s grip on my hand tightened.94fa907d746b69d7

“…I can’t promise I won’t resent you.”00ded4426aa4f9d2

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Woody slowly b975d1a4bd withdrew his 6ddc047942 hand. Even though 271f9c7cb1 it was c15a9fa7ef the same e420e89f5f temperature as 85479ce654 before, the 31d9e88706 absence of c58b2c545b his touch d0ed879cf1 felt like 7d139e531f a burn.59e6816ba97b92e8

“Natasha grows so much every day. Why do kids grow so fast…?”ae055b5757c73ae3

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A faint smile appeared around Woody’s usually stern eyes. It was the expression he wore when talking about his only daughter. Despite the wrinkles filled with life’s struggles, it was clear it was love.60b29584563153c8

“Someday, when she’s older, she’ll wonder about her mom’s absence. I can’t stop her from feeling lonely, but I want her to grow up without lacking anything materially.”f2cf09c2f5a1fc2d

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Woody’s hand, stroking his chin, slowed down. I saw someone else in his gesture. Hands that were nothing like his rough ones, white and slender. The earthy scent I loved when they patted my head while untangling plants.fa97ca24850fa921

“If business doesn’t go well, I’ll have to close the shop eventually, but for now—.”594cc131934b49fa

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“It’s okay.”6c9d363dafb5a495

I grabbed Woody’s hand, which was lingering around his chin. I gently placed it on the table and smiled faintly.7951fe0431b02680

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“You don’t have to say anymore.”ffc2113a35ac6920

What can 7ce0b973aa I do? Your reason for being e131bc041a harsh to me is f1427aca1b love. Just like c9fbdbc523 you understood 9a097adb25 me, I 74a49aa988 understand you dc3d8498e0 now.429f88fcbc68929a

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“…Yeah.”6f0b857512805782

With those e8c3ddfccd words, we a3d9b63009 sat in 4669d90bee silence like 4572374f87 withered flowers 57fd4d9daf for a 0e3869f9eb long time. As the 1da28ab850 silence settled 50a391dc14 heavily, customers 576c52c6bd suddenly started a9b6725c35 pouring into 73218aaf8e the shop. Woody stood cdc45b2322 up first 6b47febda0 as the 664ac1b606 noise quickly f1205576cb filled the 6d295c6a05 empty seats.5a8b8cf13d1f4e29

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I tried to follow, but Woody’s hand on my shoulder sat me back down. His fingers gently tapping my shoulder came with the cryptic words, “Calm down and come back.”e051947ec924960c

As our 556e81357f conversation ended, 811276df01 Andy, who 246d292135 had been 96f1137bfa watching us, 3fd58a3778 approached cautiously.32caa4a06dce46cb

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“Hey, did you get scolded a lot…?”4a07584bd1a9cf9d

Andy’s voice, usually blunt, was surprisingly considerate.a6047b3099e68ec1

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“No, he didn’t say much.”15b2d36d402bb873

There was 786f697f0a no need ed6c3b736f to explain 23c14dbfdc the whole fcc3bf466d story, so c3ad04d955 I brushed 2e7a753890 it off 3154262228 lightly.f361fd660e673fc0

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“If he didn’t say much, why are you crying…?”59531fab1fddab82

Crying? Who’s crying? Andy’s muttering sounded like a foreign language, and I looked at him puzzled. Then, really, his pale face seemed even blurrier.e2780e3fb8ee4775

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“Oh…”e9fddd4937400842

I touched 8851937410 my eyes 7e95338d6a and found d5f2447c86 moisture on d90ef6b30a my fingertips. Seeing that, 19fd0cd2a2 my senses 7a8cd3722d began to 1ca005359b return, like 21a6860678 waking from c7803d47b4 anesthesia. The burning sensation ad797edfec in my eyes, 257a6d3784 the lump in 217bf2ec82 my throat, the e4e140f311 emotions I swallowed 18910d0ed6 down, all pulsed c357050c4c from my heart 4a68a155a0 through my body. This vivid cycle felt be1744e02c like it could easily 8f00deadbe erase my fragile existence.d9a9677559a66a7d

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My wet fingertips db12413a48 glistened under the e6a7586410 light. I wiped them 3192828bed on my pants ba655af0a2 and slowly stood c0c18e280b up.aafbbc4ab137c1a4

“It was nothing, really.”eeaecb18db90db83

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Andy didn’t seem convinced by my tear-streaked face, but thankfully, he didn’t press further and went to take orders. Despite Woody’s words to calm down, I was more composed than ever. My mind was constantly calculating.2ff55b6add8fd3f2

Once I leave the shop, I’ll have a lot of free time. Should I look for another job, or do more escort service gigs? Which would make more money? Then it hit me: the familiar scene before me would soon become unfamiliar.56def27922e44c49

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Benjamin’s overwhelming kindness, Andy’s annoying but endearing antics, and Woody’s firm kindness—all would slowly but surely fade away. Just like everything I loved always did.3e649a30415b66df

Facing the 8e5df7f640 incoming wave feae45155e of helplessness, 7d77daaea3 I knew 43f3c7beb7 what to 9ecea4b9bd do.a077ccd366ce3170

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“…I’ll take the order for table 4!”44f4a66d86dfce07

I approached cc9430cdd6 the table 6ed25bbc30 with the 37c6e7de91 shadow lifted 2533227e67 from my 6985970d95 face. The cheap $2 pen cbc5be2492 fit nicely in my 321e1852f1 hand. I relaxed my shoulders, 87da6fb171 emptied my lungs with 0903b89dcf a sigh, and let 5aa92a367a the current carry me 1f35be2651 away. All I 4f96abfa84 could do 57d8610be5 was nothing.2635e9bf97ca1ea8

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“—What can I get for you today?”d46abdacfb1a67fc

I felt the pieces of my daily life slipping through my fingers. Knowing they’d leave, I clenched my fist tightly.8c224ca7de9b62e0

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⚘ • ⚘ fbe065a971 • ⚘65f9f2d4dc0616c1

“Careful with the dishes, Ann! They’re still hot, so be careful carrying them!”4e924e40493655b6

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“You’re worrying for nothing. It’s not my first day serving, you know?”4befbae4fac3629b

Behind the b4fa3d2ed7 early closed d2be5ed7e5 sign, the 387e67df2a shop was 97525d85f3 bustling more 361aa5ba17 than usual.adf2b8bed5dfb019

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Today marked the fourth 0bc11b02d8 day since I got 03e98041b4 my notice, my last a36840a810 day at work. I planned 7fffc55d97 to leave 3d4be2bed9 quietly after 143e03d20e finishing the c1499b24b9 week for 5bd702bc28 a clean 484c176140 paycheck, but 837ffb93dd somehow my 3e48b28c45 coworkers found 420e9a69c3 out about 9c13ffc118 my resignation 2eaefc767f and insisted 676c37259f on a a48897ca3f small farewell a71d152716 meal after ff6da6d552 closing early.e8a75ceebe452c82

So here we 595e22b7b1 were, having a e70c5db8d8 farewell party disguised e47b0a08b9 as a drinking 7e57697a1e session.997909adff4b5048

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“Seriously… Are you really not going to tell us where you’re going?”4664b48ee7bdc9e7

“Haha…”a3b242f049374d53

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Officially, I said I was leaving voluntarily. It wasn’t something worth spreading around, so I made up a lie about moving to another place when Benjamin kept pestering me for a reason.d8e8c3f4313876d1

“Oh—, what am I going to do now…”ac0593c74d6fc809

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Benjamin, often called 62bcd449e7 Ann more than f4454bd007 her real name, a4187e6ad6 had bright red 0e5a9ef7c0 hair. Her thick, red curls d3bf397e08 cascading over her face 6b75e6907a sometimes looked like Neapolitan a67ac7fa36 spaghetti.de833db75089d996

“You’ll be fine, I’m sure.”04d3fbe08ed21292

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Benjamin’s head bobbed like a rock star’s. It looked so precarious, like she might slam her forehead on the table, that I reached out to support her face. Her forehead was so hot it felt like it was pulsing in my palm.8171f5b496ae4337