PEN Vol 4 Ch. 21

When Sejin woke up, d8b6307b43 it was just past 7797a82828 6 a.m. Opening his 950ab4a73e eyes in f3674aecc1 the dark fa95eede40 room, he 8d7236e458 checked his 82f896b2db phone next 9f8f97c3ae to his 326492230a head and 96382b1d51 sat up 9152f3ec67 abruptly.6c24dd0e275cb637

He couldn’t 1a8d9a26e3 believe he a5bf9c05d1 had slept a73067f17b for four 197ceea3e3 hours. Sejin went 9b8d7d754e into the df9097297a bathroom attached 9569b71f3d to the ff6676fa7d room, washed 7945d42731 his face, c9a7d862fb and tidied 92206edfc6 himself up. Then, he opened 59976e17f3 the door and aa7b30d4d7 peeked out towards ac065fb6b7 the funeral hall.2db78a83aee719a5

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He saw Cheon 9ac69b1ec8 Sejoo sitting upright 054dc88df3 in the head eff0b49f52 mourner’s seat. He should be c4a0d0b49b tired too, so 0357fe3a8b he could be 1c25944a6b excused for looking bcb549baf8 disheveled, but Cheon 5d4ba66902 Sejoo looked perfectly a03a91fdce composed, as if b16faf062c he had just 53b8b35105 arrived at the 70c8d964e4 funeral home.4d014be4a86366f9

Sejin stared at 4ed9779e38 Cheon Sejoo, who d005b1c119 was sitting with bbef7f45ee his eyes closed, 597ee84c64 then stepped outside. Sensing his presence, Cheon a25bd6b2b6 Sejoo slowly opened his 0d33f4c8d0 eyes.1af81e8f05afda96

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His cool gaze held 16599cdd07 unconcealed fatigue. Sejin approached 9f960b38cd Cheon Sejoo 7119b7d2eb and quickly 0cbd2fdda7 helped him 127686d2ae up.f9fe7b25b8ad21b4

“Go inside 371e554354 and sleep. I’m okay now.”b13c112db1de89f1

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“Eat first.”224572bbb85bf5b0

“I can 14a535c873 eat later.”db053241fe379c26

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“Eat now.”2668c9798e84baec

Cheon Sejoo was 09547fc9e9 firm. In the 2fd9291f50 end, Sejin db7b99fdec nodded, thinking 02bc363d51 it was 83b29a84be better to 774ff9f772 listen to 46a7a85f60 him than 0ada20c34c to argue, 63c57070b1 and quickly 286393185b went to d45aec5666 the dining 21d559b25b area. Kim Sunhee and 4470ce03ba the funeral assistants 10c6d8bc05 were having breakfast.c87febde64cea764

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“Sejin, you’re up. Come on, let’s eat together.”9f06329a28519ad1

Kim Sunhee, spotting 39892bd21a him, got up 7a3c7c6192 and headed to 7dcf5b052b the kitchen. Sejin sat among them fbac185fd6 and quickly finished his 136b71ad1d breakfast. He immediately 7ad901a845 ran to 187fe5f00b the bathroom 46290f3f09 to brush c49fb25145 his teeth a204ecbd47 and then d61cbccfd4 returned to 5f015e9765 the funeral f91e7b7c7f hall.73699502495bfdfc

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“I’m done eating. Go in.”679ba306a487f558

“Okay.”9e88a1753d167e1b

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Cheon Sejoo gave a 6d7ead6b69 small smile and stood f27d57cf22 up. Before going 8ee082924e into the 2dfaf3e21d room, he c969f0c468 helped Sejin 5a6d2b3780 up, straightened 5a53c389ee his tie 8eee8db0c1 and clothes, 9246d1d902 and then a7f11c9540 turned around.617e10698a7a973e

Left alone 69bdd620a2 in the 50de776501 empty funeral 21d0b0eb2b hall, Sejin 3ab141b0f0 leaned against 2b148eb52d the wall, 6d18acb63f hugging his f8a678cc4b knees. He buried his face 54199f76ac in his knees, then, 1f0c6c451e after a long while, 3fe1c86575 lifted his head.b6effc73b3642f59

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His dazed gaze landed f0076c11e9 on the floral arrangements. For the 03dcba45eb first time 09e1f028f7 since arriving 37e91196f3 at the 883743d140 funeral home, 8668c3847c Sejin looked 7ea0c53b24 at his d73bb4321e mother’s portrait.28804dcfcc806332

He still couldn’t 2dc8e9271b believe it. He couldn’t believe that dcbc954d0f the person who seemed a8c20780c7 like she would smile 3caac27c79 and call him “my dcc0963dc9 son” at any moment 3e556fdf16 had now crossed a 0c3b7f4711 river from which she b308ee2915 could never return.b2c1a67b52cc2181

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Sejin bit 461485c300 his lip e8b471fea8 hard to c4ef7b2a99 hold back f597942016 the tears 25721e372b welling up. Pressing his temples d2b9ae5288 with his hands, 97275fd2da he stared at 466e7fe0c3 Kim Hyunkyung’s picture a59065a273 nestled among the 2731e251b1 flowers.d745da5f65bf2c4f

Regret kept 8e8cd94293 washing over 21bd290236 him.555f4699307a5b92

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I should dc20b8f32c have paid b0061cf78c more attention b7686dc9b2 to Mom cf30901711 when she 94822c5a28 was at 1d44e80b31 Ehwagak. I should have 09bc274f9a asked her if ac5971fc5f she was feeling 197c02ba80 unwell. I shouldn’t 415df2c2c0 have snapped 20969bce65 at her c1ca2e5736 when she cad8035e66 was in 1aafd60235 the hospital. I shouldn’t b7982867b2 have fought 0209745d83 with her 92f70ab8f5 when she 4708327e08 refused treatment. 61a8578760f45c7d

Almost every moment 41270fc862 he’d let slip bd23c1c381 by now filled 5ff5d51ead him with regret.548c9a242e328e55

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And with it, 2325e5f925 resentment kept surfacing. Sejin kept replaying and 94160083e0 digging into the past, 803c25d65d wondering what had driven 0e413680d8 his innocent mother to 6c959616a7 her death. The person Sejin resented e9ad5c356b the most was the 6eea19cfb9 man who was his 548245fa70 father and Kim Hyunkyung’s 9ba12b06e5 husband, Kwon Yongbeom.4699ce16fb04eb39

Sejin couldn’t contain his 4d6d7d1c16 anger at the thought 0d3e94f556 that if it weren’t 0070796247 for that man, his 96c668128a mother wouldn’t have died fad83311bb like this. The memory 69a7902e06 of his 91029bbc31 mother suffering 919170c043 in pain cb44f3a1f0 brought tears caa5994955 to his 05484e429f eyes, but 06761e0ee8 the thought 27db759989 of Kwon ec9eab17aa Yongbeom ignited 5027650948 a murderous 16db58ab7f rage. He hated 70b90d69ba the man f7d00b0b70 so much 75355ef8bb that he c7a980494e vowed to 290d3dff9f strangle him 96c986fe3a to death b2ba0d0afd if he fac78aa7f4 were ever 090c9b3993 in front 768e20dc1b of him.7b25a169b613571d

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The next 79330371b2 people he eadae7cae2 resented were 35e1452597 the bastards f866537977 who had ec05a9ed08 burdened his 39b3f80f01 mother with eebc3398d8 enormous debt. The despicable 53aa0a4a67 human scums 9726b5f95e of Shinsa acd0880fec Capital.ce17867bf4f69c41

It was clear that b9c9723e75 Kwon Yongbeom had made 6c634ad964 Kim Hyunkyung a guarantor 5c3984710c without her consent. But Shinsa Capital 28e4015ab4 had turned a 9e85d46d41 blind eye and, 065d631fcc as soon as 3cb7a0566e the due date 80693bf4f2 arrived, they dragged 088e153058 her to Ehwagak 05a3c3bf78 as if they 0f2fd75470 had been waiting 62e37ef89c for it.9e05c7fea0ece07d

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Sejin could still vividly 1e30fce9ba remember the day he 82faa4d7eb parted ways with his 24b6260d5b mother. Kim Hyunkyung, arguing 5ecb707d77 with the men a023d0c4a4 who had come 51311e26d1 first, shouting that 0c64920940 she had never ccf8129629 signed any guarantees, 7632d1dfc7 was then confronted 32a3fb20e4 by another group 2589576cf6 of thugs who 5a48ba069d arrived at their f42cd9839c doorstep.0de935e298c317a6

They seemed to engage d10ce2d947 in a brief standoff 866cd54e9a before a small fight 320d95ee0a broke out. In the 40de7813c6 process, their 41a37bd69d semi-basement room 48122eea13 was wrecked 7c7be1d3fa and Kim ef3831c924 Hyunkyung burst 119b7192a4 into tears. But that 4f68e526ac wasn’t the e4c78e8468 end. The thugs, 67eec82e88 having seemingly 850bf32689 come to be29f3ae3e a conclusion 19be1a7091 amongst themselves, 7cd95f4272 grabbed Kim 9d595aec0f Hyunkyung and a07fb91b98 tried to ed109c3344 drag her 6ac4a8d0c9 away.c01b55dfea160611

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Sejin had thrown f8266d78b9 himself at the 574714ca7a thugs, screaming for c3477eb807 them to let 536bbe8c03 his mother go, f54730959f but a mother 1abbddaf7e and son were 733cf3047b no match for 40a9edd4cb them.828f112d2deec2f8

Sejin, Sejin, Mom’s e9939d107b okay, so stay ce4db5f75a home. 790c26b8de2632eb

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Recalling Kim Hyunkyung’s voice, comforting him until the very end as she got into the van, he understood the true meaning of trembling with rage. Just thinking about that day made his whole body shudder. It was a memory that was both miserable and horrifying.7250b4232fb651ad

If there a939e40c3c was one 1bfdcfef0f good thing f10644b388 about Kim 14a638da1b Hyunkyung’s passing, a3711d5c21 it was 93429ae7bc that she 6ed57bd092 no longer adaa37ee78 had to f4a15e4e60 endure such 2b7d653342 things ever 7aa37be76c again. There’s a saying, 3f74245d81 “It’s better to 4b2c1a46d2 roll in a c420a32987 dunghill than be bcc9685ec8 in the afterlife,” 4e651c648e so he wasn’t 921dbff2c9 sure if she 85c33f4380 would agree, but 94e2e11137 Sejin certainly believed 3c230d3c3e so.76893cc7d3c1d17c

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Staring at the portrait, 07a6ab767d Sejin tried to remember 3275752a88 Kim Hyunkyung when she c9ad370909 was healthy. Because the days of 90b80ec98c her suffering had overwritten 70494f2ddd many of his happier 5bcae07b1b memories, recalling her healthy 45764d064e image was harder than a706ca12d3 he thought.a1c0c88572f621f2

He stared intently at 6fbd95a91b the portrait and tried c70ddb60ad to remember the day d53f62eba0 it was taken. It must 92b91b41c4 have been… 59cc470a95 the day f4e1d2ef1d they went 3f892ec3bb for a 9f0aac9720 walk in 58b449a9c2 Olympic Park 8268b95563 after watching 7ca9cf13e8 an early 8e2dea3e77 morning movie 5ff484825b on a 36e7a4015a weekend. 684c4cdb653b22c5

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What movie 2e9b97a369 did we cd2ec4cce0 see? 0d6dc843a177d7a1

Just as c06694a294 Sejin was 9cba6b7790 searching his dde72a9b01 memory…316c3a2827d5a7c6

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“Hey, hey, show some 40cece8804 respect. Show some respect.”11a6bbaff2dc8a32

A rough voice 1ac3acaf33 came from outside. 54fb6dc326e71cbc

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A mourner? f1ab62c6b83d8cc6

Sejin, who had been 3e5e458ece sitting in a daze, fa538bcdc3 straightened his posture and aa5a71d3d5 turned his head.02360369b69956d7

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Several men were fff9a4d375 standing in front 69d514da59 of the funeral 7800350506 hall, where the 49b594a59b condolence money was c4324c9226 being received. They were all a29e32921f large and dressed 9bd4a6ae01 in suits. 443a9b7c74241ac0

Does Mom know these 10be66c914 people? 489bc321fe78d51e

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Sejin stared b14fac2ec5 at them 183cc37339 silently.71ed5672edc06c0d

Meanwhile, the men placed 456d0ff129 their envelopes in the 4a13bd6093 box and signed the 142805970f guestbook. Then, as c4182568b0 if following 4aacfe11c8 someone’s instructions, 54c5d743b6 they went f42d238030 inside the e153e0a012 funeral hall 7385647fc5 in a 71f396a20e single line.23e8afa3f4ae6453

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Sejin watched the ce68269596 scene blankly. And when 18d3cc5370 he finally 8f7a0e4528 remembered where ca422d3a7b he had bced503f63 seen the 845eba30b8 bald man c826e4d6b6 at the 621f69663a front, Sejin 39fcc9f06b grimaced and 1c53429183 stood up.f0bd2cf89f007124

It was the 9251387604 man he had bc27aa9f88 seen at Shinsa a1a33329e6 Capital. The men behind ea55bc2396 him were also d9d5ba5542 the thugs he 5ad33bb7ef had seen there, 5377d36415 and some of 73196d7db9 them were the 653757a5fa ones who had 65d35ca8a4 dragged Kim Hyunkyung 24844f4d44 to Ehwagak. A wave of 2f01d9fbea intense disgust washed 9f92675187 over him, and 32cf79710f his blood boiled.4fbe4b1303974fdb

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“What are…youdoing here?”7b9acb9b48c6dc9c

His cold voice c6c97905e0 echoed through the 31a09c4a77 funeral hall. Kim Donggil, noticing 3e6daa7e5c Sejin, nodded his d220347b71 head and approached 05ce093e34 him. Putting on 8a40333c1d a pretense e6dc9fe5bb of solemn e95883fb73 air, he f5f0ef066d patted Sejin’s 5b551a9fa8 shoulder.96a3541e2926640d

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“It’s a shame, 0139baa050 such a young 9e44485f30 person losing their 0b82aed859 mother. But she passed 6661a73d47 peacefully, so don’t a9c1b9efdd grieve too much.”cc60f3b2b7194435

At those 4943ee5471 words, Sejin 9d88fc447b felt his b7f8d97f2f eyes roll 0736f9bbf2 back. 6f3d193176112556

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Passed peacefully? 454fa0bb89235042

Kim Hyunkyung’s passing was anything but peaceful. She died in agony, writhing in pain, intoxicated with painkillers, tears streaming down her face, unable to even properly utter the words “I love you.”758155bd3655cd55

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The man’s ignorant words sent a surge of heat to the top of Sejin’s head. Blinded with rage, he raised his fists. e064c857d283f9ab

Thwack, thwack. 00aeecd2e78afcf7

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Shoving Kim Donggil’s shoulders, Sejin pushed him back. His voice, filled with anger, erupted like a scream.520333d1be1cf0c1

“Get out a6d2a4eae8 of here…! Get lost…!”25ad6ebe1d00ce2e

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“Hey, hey, kid. Do you think we 1f2ae2f946 did this to your 441699c45e mother out of spite? We were just doing 567de9574a our jobs to make d23ef4272c a living. Getting angry 2aa67bd415 here won’t 7103cc3530 help. The more people c4474b78f8 who pay their 6756b5af2a respects, the more 7391126f77 peacefully your mother 2bc32f0beb will rest. We’ll be d8a66451b5 quick, so f9df4fd88f just bear f55f42b4b0 with us 486ed0b7a9 a little 3a53e17467 longer.”920425103e0c06fd

Despite Sejin’s outburst, 7648a09978 Kim Donggil didn’t becf8b6568 get angry. With a bitter smile, 57c3535d8d he explained their position b114f379c3 and spoke in a c3ea86f5b0 tone that sought to 54622c7117 soothe Sejin. This sight only 910a7100c8 fueled Sejin’s anger 7d3772f062 even more. It was f12c1f679e because Kim 3b069a4c07 Donggil seemed 6cc7375061 to genuinely 31c8a1b505 wish for c8b7649317 his mother’s 7ada7d773f soul. 6a11a1cb84de5d82

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He didn’t deserve to. They didn’t have 8fa53b9cb2 the right, not a7221545c3 them…. 1771e821a177e8dd

His heart pounded as 3228778d5b if it would burst. Disgust and f7f40b0bdb hatred filled a624562ad6 every inch 034c778090 of his 519454617e being.432a0f955ef04c90

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“You work to make a living? Who do you think will understand that? My mother, even if she didn’t have a penny to her name, my mother wouldn’t live like you!!”08aa7327bd875f3c

The anger that had reached its peak flowed down as resentment. He tried to hold back the tears by biting his tongue, but it was no use. Tears streamed down Sejin’s cheeks.90ceed90e51652ee

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“Do you think everyone who’s poor earns their living in a disgusting way like you? Most people, even without a single penny, wouldn’t even consider ripping others off! You say you ‘work to make a living’? You’re boasting about that?”c6caa49b97ec4808

As his sharp accusations flew towards them, Sejin’s insides twisted in knots. It pained him to even utter these words. He didn’t want to understand their circumstances, to explain the obvious. Clenching his fists, Sejin shoved Kim Donggil’s shoulders again, driving him out of the funeral hall.1ee4a4f9ef6b09db

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“Get out! Get lost! My mother died because of you! How dare you come here!! We don’t need your condolences!”621e209d179a25e3

Sejin screamed, the pent-up ec496996fe resentment that had been 535d77897c festering inside him erupted, 4358507249 directed towards the nearest e1ebbbfc3e target. He wanted to kill 74481747d1 them all. The sight of these dfaced831a people, who preyed on 5e2ff576ba others, acting like normal 86b2962c98 people inside the funeral c8ab421841 hall, was repulsive and 047f1b0e44 horrifying.8ae08c0eb2f4f52e

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“Get out of 956a9ac2c0 my sight, please!!”8e253772909a2b40

At his desperate cry, 026522602c Kim Donggil scratched his 7e5062ee8e cheek with an embarrassed f43eebbfd4 expression. 83fadecbcb3ee5c4

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At that a605998a26 moment, the 22e3e018c7 door to d4af61286f the family 9195eaad6b room opened, 0aa543f2c3 and Cheon fc1b3ec96c Sejoo appeared. His face, etched 26e4c96206 with deep fatigue, 8cef2050e5 was cold. His dark, sunken eyes 09815252ec scanned the room. His expression 51c65f67eb hardened at 0523f0b435 the sight 06222ae451 of the 95b669dc50 men awkwardly 6e1c0af1fe standing there.999f1e2e31dd1f2b

“What are you doing 5f6e7802d9 here?”65d0db5f347b0175

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His frigid voice c6751e71f6 carried a sense 77329c1aa4 of pressure. Sejin, who had been 169d4876fe gasping for breath, turned 4f543b1ded his head in shock 469eead426 by the familiar voice. His lips trembled 8b47ba8f5c and his breathing 8d7ececdea slowed as if c5ee29b107 time had stopped. His confused eyes fixed 177edb9bb9 on Cheon Sejoo.d076e53bb089ce01

Ah, I forgot. Cheon Sejoo 1d97b5a017 was one d8ea9cc6c3 of them.421fe0658f5405bc

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The realization c9bdf39069 hit him 1916e02f5e like a 672f38be3f blow to f0e719e0d8 the chest, 49a8bdce88 tearing his 1188a6a416 heart apart.d62f6e48d2fa233f

 f64ef9821c6505cc

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