AA Chapter 2.2

Since he had thrown away those clothes, he needed to buy new ones. To help relax the very tense child and buy new clothes, Tennessee took him to the mall. There wasn’t time to look around the whole place as it was a big place. Looking at his watch, Tennessee just let the child loose with one comment.

“I’ll give you thirty minutes, choose.”

Naturally, the child headed toward the mall’s inner, relatively inexpensive store. It was a shop that sold clothes at cheap prices, selling leftover stock from other shopping malls and such.

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Walking confidently, the child then gave a glance to a sports apparel store on the right. For just a moment, so brief that if it weren’t Tennessee, no one would have noticed, the child’s steps halted. Then the child naturally moved on.

“Do you want something?”

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The hesitating child shook his head. Only when Tennessee stopped and looked did he quietly answer “yes.”

“But it’s expensive.”

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That’s what he muttered. But this was just a shopping mall. Tennessee could buy clothes from any of the luxury shops where employees stood in lines if he wanted to. So why make such a fuss about this?

“Buy it.”

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“…Really?”

Tennessee had bought the child’s clothes from Walmart or Target until now not because money was tight, but because those big marts were the closest. When Tennessee gestured with his chin, the child excitedly looked around.

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Sitting in a chair at the center of the store, Tennessee watched the child bustle about.

“This one.”

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Not forgetting the thirty-minute limit, the child came back shortly with something. It was a sleeveless t-shirt with a black logo on a white background.

“Is that all you want?”

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“Yes.”

“Are you sure you don’t need anything else?”

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“This is enough.”

“I clearly said you could buy more. It’s your loss.”

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When Tennessee started to get up, the child hurriedly shouted “Wait a moment!” Tennessee quietly sat back down. After waiting about 10 more minutes, the child chose a total of five items and narrowed it down to just two.

“Now I’m really done.”

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The child’s face was flushed, as if even this much made him satisfied.

“We’ll take these too.”

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When Tennessee pointed to the remaining three items the child had set aside, the child’s face lit up like a switch had been flipped. Throughout the checkout process, the child bounced around and spoke quickly. Just like others his age.

Tennessee looked around the mall. Young children holding their parents’ hands, teenagers hanging out in groups, elementary school students walking and talking while their parents followed far behind. This kid would blend in surprisingly naturally if let out there.

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“Is there anything else you need? How about these shoes?”

The clerk approached and suggested. The child shook his head, but Tennessee’s eyes fell downward. Right, he’s grown relatively taller. At least an inch.

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“Please measure his shoe size.”

The clerk perceptively had the child sit down.

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“Are we buying shoes too?”

“Mn.”

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The child knew Tennessee hadn’t checked the price of the clothes even once.

“But this place is really expensive. Do you have that much money?”

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The child quickly whispered, afraid others might hear. Tennessee smirked.

Thus, the child ended up with three t-shirts, two pairs of shorts, and a pair each of basketball shoes and sneakers.

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“Thank you.”

The child kept thanking him the entire time he was leaving the mall. Tennessee had never seen the child so excited before.

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“Thank you. I’m so happy.”

To the point where Tennessee wondered why he hadn’t done this sooner, since it wasn’t even difficult.

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***

“Stay here.”

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After returning to the hotel from the mall, Tennessee instructed. The child, whose face was bright from wearing new clothes, nodded.

Tennessee’s ‘Stay here’ was amazingly identical each time, down to the tone and pitch. The child fell into fantasy. Maybe Tennessee is actually a robot, copying and pasting the same voice clip each time?

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“So can I walk around the hotel?”

“Only in crowded areas. Not late at night.”

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The child watched Tennessee getting ready to go out. Every time Tennessee bent over in his white dress shirt, the fabric pulled tight and revealed his toned upper body without an ounce of fat. Due to the thin shirt, the flexing and relaxing of muscles in his back and arms was clearly visible.

How many people would know about those scars under such thin clothes?

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The child recalled the body full of gunshot wounds. After recently seeing Tennessee’s bare upper body, he was aware he was becoming too fixated on his scars, but his attention kept returning there.

Tennessee finished preparing quickly. Even without particularly styling his hair or outfit, Tennessee looked impressive when leaving the hotel room.

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“It’s me. I’m here.”

The person on the phone was Megan. When Tennessee spoke, the club bouncer opened the door, perhaps Megan had notified him in advance. However, as soon as the door opened, it became clear that Megan hadn’t given any notice to the bouncer at all.

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It wasn’t that he could enter because of the owner’s permission, but because today was a male-only night with female strippers performing. There were naked women everywhere.

So that’s what the text on the letter board meant.

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“Hey! Tennesseeee!”

Tennessee learned for the first time that even lighting could be noisy. The music was so loud it could only be heard as noise. If forced to choose, Tennessee preferred bars or diners over clubs. Even one-night stands were better found there.

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While heading toward Megan, his eyes met with a woman nearby. After a brief eye greeting, Tennessee turned away.

“Why did you call?”

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“What?! I can’t hear you! Sit down first!”

“I said, why did you call?”

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“What else could it be, you think I called you because I was bored? Well, honestly, that’s part of it!”

If that was true, Tennessee was thinking of flipping this place over. Reading that expression, Megan yelped and gestured to Tennessee.

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The club office was quite far away. He had to pass through the club and around a corridor. Though the club music could still be heard in the office, just being away from that place was a great comfort to Tennessee.

“First, this. At first, I was going to look into everything and give it all at once. But I need more time.”

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The envelope Megan handed over was quite thick.

“You asked me to look into that person called Hurston. That kid Derek or whatever is in there too. Want me to look into who was at the foster facility too? I only dug into those two, not the kids.”

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“Right now, it’s fine.”

Anything about the kids could be asked directly to the child anyway. Or he could take care of these two first and slowly expand the scope.

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Tennessee stood up from his seat.

“And since you’re here, have a drink before you go. Help our sales too.”

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“Just ask for money instead.”

“But that’s no fun.”

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Without responding, Tennessee left the office. It was fortunate that smoking was allowed at least. Before pushing through the annoying club crowd to leave, Tennessee put a cigarette in his mouth, planning to take a brief rest.

“…Uhm, hello.”

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Tennessee looked up. The person who came out through the club door appeared to be a woman in her late twenties. Tank top and jeans. Judging by her attire, she wasn’t a stripper. Tattoos covered both her arms and even her collarbone.

“I used to work under Megan, though not anymore. I’m a bartender. Sometimes I DJ too.”

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Awkwardness was visible in the woman’s gestures and expressions.

“What are you doing?”

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Megan, who had followed Tennessee out, discovered the two. Seeming to understand the situation, she waved her hand dismissively.

“Just disappear to a hotel or wherever, quick.”

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The woman slightly blushed, and Tennessee put out his cigarette.

***

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When he returned to the hotel parking lot, it was already early dawn. However, Tennessee didn’t immediately open the door. He remembered a face he had just passed by. It was a Hispanic man he had seen once before, when he went looking for Alejandro.

It seemed Alejandro couldn’t forget his recent grudge and was trying something foolish. As long as he drove this car, he wouldn’t be able to escape his sight.

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Tennessee took out his gun and pondered briefly. If it were the old him, he would have quietly set a trap and waited. He would have welcomed him with doors wide open, letting him charge in as he pleased. But having the child there was a concern.

Should I part ways with the child faster than expected? Or should I take care of Alejandro first? He needed to make a decision soon.

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After a brief contemplation, Tennessee finally entered the hotel room. It was so late that he could smell the night air on himself. As he bent down to take off his shoes, his disheveled hair tickled his eyebrows.

“Tennessee?”

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It was the child’s voice. Although it was well past bedtime, the voice was clear and bright.

“I waited because you didn’t come for so long.”

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The child wanted to earn his keep. From small organizing tasks to running errands. Actually, there was no need for that. Tennessee was accustomed to an efficient lifestyle from his long military service and deployment experience. The room wasn’t messy or cluttered to begin with, so there wasn’t really any need for organizing. It was easier to do small tasks himself than to assign them to the kid.

But Tennessee didn’t say anything because he enjoyed seeing the child busily moving around. There was life in it. It was a sight worth seeing, the child finding his own sense of fulfillment. However, no matter how indebted he felt, there was no need to wait and worry until such a late hour.

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“You’re not hurt, are you?”

Perhaps it wasn’t due to a sense of debt, but pure concern. The child, with a drowsy face, stared blankly at Tennessee.

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“I’m not hurt.”

“…I was worried.”

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“…I see.”

By this point, Tennessee felt somewhat guilty, even though it shouldn’t have mattered to him whether the child waited for hours or days at the hotel. What was this kid to him? Strictly speaking, it’s not like he had done anything wrong. But when the child said he had waited for him all along with a sleepy face, he couldn’t think of anything to say.

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Tennessee ruffled the child’s hair as he lay on his side. The child’s black hair, which he touched for the first time, was as soft as the child himself and scattered between his fingers like grains of sand.

Seeing the child’s faint smile, Tennessee turned away. He felt uncomfortable having returned without taking a shower.

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‘Let me stay the night.’

He had rejected the woman who said that. He even wondered why he hadn’t rejected her sooner.

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The dress shirt slid down his firm arms, and the belt made a metallic sound as it clinked. After confirming that the child was lying with his back turned, Tennessee removed even his black underwear. Finally, he entered the bathroom. Between the noisy sounds of water hitting the floor with force, the child slowly opened his eyes.

The child remembered the hand that had stroked his hair, along with its cool scent. He touched his own hair where Tennessee had ruffled it, as if retracing it. His heart leaped as if he had received praise. And immediately after, it fell without finding bottom. It wasn’t a thrilling fall. It was despair. Along with the faint tobacco smell, Tennessee had carried another strong scent.

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The child bit his lip. Though he was at an age often overlooked as young, the child had grown enough to at least understand his own emotions.

Betrayal.

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Those hands that usually only carried his own distinct scent and the smell of tobacco now had the scent of dryer sheets and women’s perfume. It was an unpleasantly cozy scent. It felt like having a real family, something he had never experienced. If they had had a proper family, perhaps Tennessee and him would have carried such a smell too.

Why am I like this? The child could only bite his lip hard without showing any reaction. He could never tell Tennessee. He would surely find it annoying and get irritated. He was already a burden. He didn’t want to become an annoying troublemaker too.

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No, perhaps these feelings were natural. The child swallowed his burning emotions. Hadn’t he worried and fretted while Tennessee was out doing whatever somewhere? He would have been angry even if Tennessee had just been meeting a friend.

He wasn’t usually someone who stayed out late, what if something had happened, if so how could he contact him, how should he help him – such thoughts had kept him from sleeping. After worrying so much, Tennessee had… with someone…

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So this feeling of betrayal was natural.

He had been mistaken. Because Tennessee had always been alone since they first met, he couldn’t even imagine that he had his own life that he didn’t know about. It was foolish of him to think that.

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At eleven years old, the child buried his face in the blanket, surrounded by this sense of alienation and betrayal.

***

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Tennessee turned around, feeling a strange gaze. It was the child. He was standing against the wall with his arms crossed. It was a gaze that seemed to ask “where are you going again?” Tennessee, who had been repeatedly adopted and abandoned and never grew up in a stable home, thought that if he had had a grandmother who cared much about him, she would have probably given him such looks.

The child opened his drowsy eyes and looked at Tennessee’s clothes.

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“Where are you going?”

“To a strip club.”

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When he blurted it out without thinking, the child gasped, ‘Huh!’. Then, despite having an expression that said that he was full of things to say, he somehow managed to hold back his nagging. Even Tennessee felt slightly wronged by this reaction.

Originally, Tennessee was going to Megan’s club, and it would be for women only today. At most, he would just waste his eyes on the sight of men in scraps of cloth seducing women with all sorts of obscene poses. He was only going because Megan had left a voice message. If he had been visiting a strip club for personal entertainment, he wouldn’t have felt this strange about it.

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Tennessee, not feeling the need to explain the details to the child, quietly finished his preparations. He shouldn’t have told the child his destination in the first place. He wondered why he found it so easy to talk to that kid.

“Isn’t that place like… you know?”

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“Like what?”

Tennessee smiled languidly, as if waiting to see what the child would say.

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“Like… where people wiggle on laps for money?”

That made even Tennessee burst out laughing. The child, seemingly displeased with his reaction, sulkily pushed out his lips. Then, after watching carefully, the child quietly asked.

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“Can’t I come with you?”

“What?”

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“I’ll stay quietly in the car.”

When did he stop giving him that sideways look? Now the child looked up with big eyes like Puss in Boots. When there was no response, he even clasped his hands pleadingly.

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His request was futile. Although Megan ran it, it was still a strip club, and anything could happen. Surely somewhere there would be drugs and sexual harassment running rampant. But the faces of the gang members he saw last time bothered him. By now, they would know that he was accompanying a certain child. Though reluctant, this seemed better. Tennessee nodded in agreement.

As soon as Tennessee parked the car and turned around, the child beat him to it.

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“I’ll stay here.”

Tennessee, who had started to say ‘Sta-’ just nodded. He turned on the radio too.

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“Turn on the heater if you’re cold.”

“But it’s warm?”

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“Then turn on the air conditioning.”

“…”

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“It won’t take long.”

The child nodded. As Tennessee opened the door, the child called him in a small voice. He turned his head to look at the child.

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“Uhm… I’m sorry about asking about who you’ve killed so carelessly last time. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

The child’s apology was smooth, as if he had thought about it for a long time.

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“I wasn’t upset.”

“But still, I made you remember something unpleasant.”

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The child seemed lost in thought for a moment, looking to the left, then remembered Tennessee’s eyes that had fallen downward. He was a man of few words. Even in that moment, the child knew that Tennessee had swallowed many words.

Half-closing the door he had opened, Tennessee let out a small sigh. Although Megan’s message was brief and her voice wasn’t urgent, Megan wasn’t someone who contacted people without reason. The faster the job was handled, the better. Tennessee checked his watch. Still, he thought it wouldn’t hurt to spare a few minutes.

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“It was my mother. She was a heroin addict.”

‘Baby.’

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Tennessee despised the way that woman called him.

‘Where’s your father?’

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‘Mom, that was two months ago.’

Heroin was just the beginning. She was a woman whose entire body was destroyed by all sorts of drugs. When was the last time she had been in her right mind? It was hard to remember. She would stare out the window with hazy eyes and then do drugs. Used syringes rolled around on the floor, and blackened spoons lay scattered about.

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She also suffered from severe depression. The house was dying in darkness, and like the house, Tennessee was withering moment by moment. Sometimes despair and anger would rise together. It happened every time he saw the woman lying on the floor like a dead dog.

When the drug effects wore off, she would hold Tennessee and cry.

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I’ll do better. Baby, let’s get through this.

Then Tennessee would feel the storm in his chest calm down. Who knows how many times this cycle repeated – the storm raging, then subsiding, then raging again.

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Until one day. Unusually, the curtains that had covered the windows were open. His mon was lying in bed, and Tennessee was on his way back from a distant church that gave out free food. He had already eaten his portion, and his mother’s sandwich was still in his hand.

Mom. Mom.

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She didn’t answer. He just thought she was sleeping. Then he noticed the new injection marks on her arm. Her body was covered in needle marks. When regular spots weren’t working anymore, she would inject into the backs of her hands and feet. It was disgusting.

Tennessee was gradually becoming sick of seeing her lying there like a corpse. Tennessee put down the sandwich. He hadn’t even properly applied for food stamps. There was nothing to eat. There was no hope.

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At that point, Tennessee felt an uncontrollable rage rising. He was furious at the fact that there was no hope. At the fact that she had driven both herself and him into a place without hope. At his father who had left with false promises of hope.

That day, Tennessee realized that when anger becomes too intense, it can actually make a person cold and clear-headed. With an unbelievably clear mind and cold rationality, he put on gloves.

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And took out the gun from the safe above the cupboard. He already knew the safe’s password. His mother, suffering from severe depression, would take out the gun several times a day, look at it, put it back, and repeat.

Tennessee took steps toward her as she slept, drugged. Between his worn shoes and the dirty carpet, a used syringe broke with a noise. Holding the gun, Tennessee stared at her for a long time.

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It would have been nice if Father were here. Then I could have killed him right away without having to go look for him. Tennessee grabbed his mother’s hand as she lay there. A wretched body, cold and losing vitality with each passing day.

At the time, Tennessee didn’t even breathe heavily. He was just calm. Things that needed to be done came to mind clearly. Remembering that his mother was left-handed, he placed the gun in her left hand. A faint breathing sound could be heard.

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Tennessee then caressed her cracked index fingernail, and placed her index finger on the trigger. Along with a deep breath, he placed his own finger over hers.

She hadn’t woken up even then. And it was one shot.

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Unlike other suicides, the fact that she was lying down or that no suicide note was found wasn’t even considered. After all, it was a neighborhood where people died every day. The police didn’t even properly examine the body. Moreover, her heroin addiction and depression were no secret. He later learned that he didn’t even need to wear gloves. The adults around him showed not even a shred of sincerity. The investigation couldn’t even be called an investigation. That was all.

“It was a strange feeling to see what I had only imagined become reality,” Tennessee said. The child was moistening his dry lips.

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“…I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, it was too bad for her.”

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“No…” Tennessee. The child said this only with his eyes. But he was worried that Tennessee might not like it if he said it out loud. He didn’t want it to be seen as cheap sympathy. Tennessee, who had been lightly tapping the steering wheel with his index finger, broke the silence and asked.

“Are you afraid of me?”

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At that single question, the child suddenly burst into tears as if he had been holding it in all this time. Tennessee, who had been thinking about how scared a child must be to cry, changed his mind at the sight of the child. The child was shaking his head while crying bitterly.

“I, hic, wish I had been Tennessee’s dad.”

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“…What?”

Why such an out-of-the-blue answer? Tennessee was confused, but the child was completely sincere without a grain of lie.

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“Hnng… I would have treated you well.”

How arrogant. Such words came to his mind, but surprisingly, it didn’t feel bad. It was because he felt the intention behind the expression itself rather than the words themselves.

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“You’re crying, I’ll go for now.”

Tennessee stepped out of the car. The child, who had been crying loudly and then went ‘Huh…?’ and looked up, ended up blankly watching Tennessee’s back. And then, for some unknown reason, sadness washed over him and he cried again. The tone Tennessee used was too detached to the child. Despite such things happening, Tennessee seemed to be living better than anyone else now.

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I hope he doesn’t think I’m sympathizing and feeling sorry for him just because. The child cried alone for about ten more minutes after that. Then, suddenly, he remembered that Tennessee hadn’t said when he would return. The child quickly wiped his tears while still sniffling. His sleeve was already a mess. Even so, for a minor to be alone, at night, this late at night! I’m alone in the car, surely he won’t meet a woman somewhere and come back half a day later like last time? …But it’s still suspicious. He said to stay here. The child was torn. It had been at least ten minutes since Tennessee left, so even if he ran out now, he wouldn’t be able to catch up. While the child, adorned with tear stains like ornaments, was caught up in tremendous anguish, tap tap! The window rattled. Startled as if struck by lightning, the child opened the door. It was Tennessee.

“Is it over already?”

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“…If you’re done crying, follow me.”

It was Tennessee who had just been about to enter the club but changed his mind. Somehow, the child kept coming to mind.

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“…Are you telling me to come into the club?”

Your immorality knows no bounds. Looking at the child with exactly that kind of face, Tennessee frowned.

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“Why would you go to a club.”

Taking the child, Tennessee went around to the back of the building instead of the main entrance he usually used. It was the back door where food ingredients, emergency exits, and staff entrances were located. He already knew the password.

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Not long after passing through a corridor stacked with various plastic containers, the sound of club music rumbling like thunder in the distance could be heard shaking the walls.

He was about to take the child to the office, but Tennessee turned around, thinking Megan might give him an earful. There was a private space where Megan occasionally had one-night stands or spent time. It seemed like a storage and, unlike the interior of the club, it was shabby.

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Opening the door, Tennessee frowned upon seeing a familiar face. It was Megan. In the space where the walls and floor were bare cement, a lone sofa was placed, and Megan was smoking a joint there.

“Why didn’t you answer the phone?”

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“Too busy to answer.”

Although he knew it, it was even more shabby than he remembered. Walls that looked like they could collapse at any moment, and a musty smell to boot. Plus, there were traces of life here and there.

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“What’s with the kid? …Is it really a kid? At first, I thought it was a child’s corpse.” After saying such a stupid thing, Megan quickly approached.

“Who is it?”

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“You don’t need to know.”

“You know minors are prohibited here, right?”

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“He won’t cause trouble.”

Megan clicked her tongue and shook her head. For Megan, Tennessee was already a difficult being to understand, so she chose to give up quickly. It was easier to remember that the only predictable part about Tennessee was his unpredictability.

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“If the kid pees on my sofa, it’s your responsibility.”

“I’ll buy you a new one.”

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Unaware of the child’s expression of shock and betrayal, the two adults were engrossed in their conversation.

“Wait here.” Tennessee pointed to the sofa.

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“Alright, thank you.”

Tennessee looked around the gloomy storage room. The incandescent light flickered on and off occasionally, and he could already hear what sounded like mice. The musty smell of mold and the scent of marijuana. Yet the words he heard were ‘thank you.’

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“Why did you call me?”

“Because of the documents.”

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Megan, who was rummaging through the sofa and shabby wooden table, got irritated. Looks like it’s in the office. At those words, Tennessee immediately got up. He didn’t forget to gesture to the child sitting obediently on the sofa.

“You’re living well despite not having the time.”

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Megan blurted out, watching Tennessee grab the child’s wrist. Tennessee was about to retort when Megan’s phone rang loudly.

Damn it. Shit. Muttering such curses, Megan waved her hand.

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“Go on, I’ll be right there.”

At Megan’s words, Tennessee left the storage room. Although they hadn’t been there for even a few minutes, stepping outside allowed them to breathe much fresher air.

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As they went back the way they came, Tennessee led the child to a small office. Sitting in a chair, the child blankly stared at Tennessee.

He had a cigarette in his mouth but for some reason wasn’t lighting it. After looking up at Tennessee, the child looked around to observe the office. While the child was doing this, Tennessee clicked his tongue and put away his phone. What did she mean by not having the time? What was that about? Waiting for Megan, who had dropped such a bombshell and disappeared, was making him antsy.

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“Stay-”

“-here.”

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“…”

You’re getting more and more brazen.

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Leaving the child in the club office, Tennessee came out into the corridor. Tennessee was just about to turn the corner as he crossed the long corridor.

“Ah.”

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He stared blankly at the person he had bumped into, and the woman greeted him. It was the woman he had spent the night with. Her name was…

“Caylen.”

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“I know.”

Caylen smiled awkwardly. When Tennessee didn’t say anything, the woman spoke first cheerfully.

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“You came today too?”

“I have an acquaintance here. What about you? I heard you’re not working under Megan anymore.”

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“…I also have an acquaintance here.”

Caylen was wearing a tank top again today. A lotus flower and a Vishnu were drawn long across her arms and collarbone. One of the three highest gods in Hinduism… As Tennessee’s gaze reached her chest, Caylen turned her body to show Brahma on her back.

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And at that moment, the child who had peeked his face out from beyond the office door couldn’t help but be shocked. That sinful man, not content with staying out all night, is now flirting with another woman!

Tennessee had told him to stay there, and he had obediently done so. The child who had closed the office door felt tears welling up to their throat again and twisted his mouth. Tennessee shouldn’t have done that.

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‘Stay here.’

It was always what he said. As if he were as inconvenient as taking a dog along. Treating him like luggage like that.

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“If it’s okay with you…,” Caylen, who had pushed her hair back with her index finger, was about to open her mouth.

“Daddy.”

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At a sound that shouldn’t be heard at this time, especially from the club office, the gazes of the two adults turned to the corridor. It was the child. Tennessee, who had identified the source of ‘Daddy’, rubbed his forehead, and an earthquake was occurring in Caylen‘s pupils.

“Daddy… What are you doing here?”

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“…Daddy? Uh- You had a child?”

“…”

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“You and Daddy know each other?”

The child was eleven years old and would soon be a middle school student. However, because of his small build, he looked younger than his peers. Such a child called out to Tennessee, dragging out his pronunciation as if sleepy. Moreover, his nose and eyes were red as if he had just cried.

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Jeez, what a bad joke. Tennessee, who had rubbed his head again, held out his hand to the child.

“Come here.”

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The child rushed into his arms.

Caylen smiled awkwardly. Her gesture was saying that she would leave now.

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“Caylen.”

Tennessee called her while holding the child.

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“Is your acquaintance on this side? There’s only offices here.”

The woman smiled. However, Tennessee didn’t miss the slight stiffening of her lips for a brief moment.

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“You caught me, I actually saw you coming, Tennessee.”

“I came in through the back door, though.”

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“But you came from the parking lot, right?”

Tennessee stared at Caylen, who was smiling. As her brown hair scattered strand by strand, Tennessee entered the office while holding the child.

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“…I’m sorry.”

The child apologized immediately.

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To the child, adults were nothing but fearful and despicable beings. Not once had he truly expected comfort from them. It was the same when being scolded. The child wasn’t afraid of being scolded itself, but rather feared the punishment that would follow. But now it was different. He was anxious, wondering if Tennessee would be disappointed because he had caused trouble out of an impulse act.

Glancing up at Tennessee repeatedly, the child took a small breath. His expression was terrifyingly blank. The child, who had long been accustomed to reading the room, immediately grasped the atmosphere.

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He wasn’t angry now, but something had gone wrong. The child’s blue eyes trembled. Whether he had made a huge mistake, or if something was happening.

“Tennessee?”

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Tennessee didn’t answer. He was quickly organizing his thoughts. Tennessee thought the woman’s words didn’t add up.

She said she came to the club because she knew someone. When asked, she explained that it wasn’t actually an acquaintance, but that she had come in after seeing Tennessee. Saying she followed him in from the parking lot? If so, it doesn’t explain why she came to the club in the first place.

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“…Tennessee?”

From the first meeting, she had been subtle. The day Tennessee met her was a day when male strippers came. Not because of her sexual preference, but something felt off. It was a chilling intuition he had felt before.

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To reassure the child for now, Tennessee stroked his head. The child’s thin, dark hair lightly brushed between Tennessee’s fingers like a breeze. The child’s heart, which had been beating rapidly, shook madly before returning to normal.

Just then, the office door burst open.

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“Damn it, Megan.”

“Tennessee.”

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Tennessee was already aiming his gun. If he hadn’t confirmed it was Megan, he would have shot. Skipping unnecessary words, Megan rummaged through the drawer and pulled out some documents.

“So, what’s really up with that kid?”

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Tennessee ignored the question as if he hadn’t heard her, but Megan was persistent.

“Are you planning to keep going around with that kid like this? Or are you going to hide him?”

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“That’s none of your business.”

“It’s not my business, but if you’re going around distracted by one kid, I’m not going to do this kind of work for you anymore. A dimwit like you is useless.”

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That’s what Tennessee wanted to say to Megan. However, her words were annoyingly reasonable. He still hadn’t decided what to do with the child. Since he couldn’t just ignore it, the child’s existence had become quite a problem.

Because there was a hideout he had prepared before, Tennessee originally wasn’t planning to stay at a hotel. Then he thought he’d stay at the hotel for just one day, but how many days had it been now? Tennessee was very aware of this.

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What the, it’s not even a vacation. If I was going to hide him, I should have hidden him properly. The police had already come because of the commotion. Since they seemed like brothers, not an ordinary family, it was a combination likely to stick in people’s minds. He should have gone into the concrete cave right after that incident. He should have been training his body, gathering information, and maintaining weapons while waiting for the right time inside. But…

‘Tennessee, let’s eat.’

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He realized it wasn’t a place he could take that child. It was a place with poor facilities and poor hygiene. There wasn’t even proper sunlight, let alone windows, and the surroundings were full of weapons like rifles, so it wasn’t an environment suitable for taking a child. So he ended up staying at this hotel awkwardly, spending a non-vacation vacation. If things really went wrong and someone came tracking him, being there wouldn’t be wise at all.

Maybe because of the child, a corner of his mind had rusted and turned mushy. It’s probably nothing. It’s probably not a big deal, there’s probably no need for that – he had such careless thoughts and faint hopes. Megan was right this time. Walking around distracted was like walking around with his heart exposed.

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This is no place suitable for taking a child. Get a grip.

Shaking his head, Tennessee turned his gaze to the child. A screw had come loose. It was an undeniable fact. The child had become an obstacle to him. Whether he died right now or were kidnapped and used as a drug mule, it wasn’t his concern.

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Tennessee finally made a decision. Composing his expression, Tennessee cut off Megan’s accusatory words and asked a question first.

“That woman. Caylen. When did she start working and when did she quit?”

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“Recently. Why?”

While doing it, Tennessee had been able to see hidden aspects of her that she hadn’t shown. At least as far as he remembered, there were no traces of work on her hands like blisters or scars on her body from working in the field. What kind of woman was she? There was no physical evidence, but it was sufficiently suspicious, and Tennessee wasn’t a person who believed in coincidences.

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“If I were you, I wouldn’t let her in here.”

“If you say so, there must be a reason.”

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Megan didn’t pry further into that matter.

“Ah, Tennessee, do you remember someone named Taylor Watson?”

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“No.”

Seeing that a face didn’t immediately come to mind, he must have only heard the name.

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“It’s in the documents.”

Megan nodded towards the child. Behind Tennessee, who was nodding, Megan waved her hand saying, ‘If you’re not going to increase sales, get out quickly.’

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***

When the car stopped, the child was visibly flustered.

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“Where is this?”

You don’t need to know. Tennessee swallowed those words. The child, not yet noticing Tennessee’s resolve, asked several questions. Having been with Tennessee for a few weeks, the child had learned some patterns.

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“Are we changing cars again?”

As he said this, the child hurriedly gathered his belongings. He even checked under the seat to see if anything was left behind. However, when he saw Tennessee take out his gun, the child stopped moving. It didn’t seem like they were just changing cars.

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“Stay here.”

By now, those words might be etched into his eardrum. With a sigh, the child nodded. Tennessee opened the door and leaned out.

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“Uhm, Tennessee.”

The child carefully asked Tennessee, who was looking somewhere across the street.

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“Is it okay if I don’t have a gun?”

A gun is not a cool weapon at all. It’s heavy and just cold. Like a game console that dies completely when you unplug it no matter how hard you play, a human’s life ends with one bullet.

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Realizing this, the child didn’t want to hold a gun again, but this place was somehow desolate and dark. There were no passersby, and it seemed like even if someone died right now, no one would know. It would be okay if Tennessee was beside him, but hadn’t he finished preparing to leave? After throwing out that one phrase, ‘Stay here.’

“…”

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That was the longest silence the child had witnessed from Tennessee. Tennessee, who was silently attaching the silencer and looking around, gave no answer, but the child got the impression that he was in deep thought.

“You don’t need one.”

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The child nodded at the answer that finally came. If Tennessee said it wasn’t necessary, then it wasn’t necessary. But suddenly, those words sounded ambiguous. His heart sank, but the child tried to comfort himself, telling himself not to be oversensitive.

“When are we going back?”

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In the dark space, the red light at the end of the cigarette flared up brightly. In a place without a single point of light, even the smoke Tennessee exhaled wasn’t visible. The cigarette fell from Tennessee’s fingertips. He soon turned his body.

He didn’t give a clear answer. He was a man of few words, but Tennessee was someone who would answer immediately when asked. Anxiety howled like thunder. The child curled up his body.

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He looks like he won’t come back again. He started to have that faint intuition. No, Tennessee will come back.

‘I’ll tell you beforehand if I’m going to leave you.’

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Because he promised to tell him if he was going to leave.

‘Didn’t I tell you not to trust people?’

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Even though he said that.

***

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They didn’t have the courage to attack directly. They couldn’t just start shooting in the hotel out of nowhere and there was no way to know in advance when and where they’d go. However, they knew he was going around with the child.

So Tennessee concluded that targeting the child was the natural logic. Even a fool could figure that out.

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‘I don’t know how important that kid is, but since that guy keeps taking him around, there must be a reason.’ They must be making calculations like that. Tennessee read Alejandro’s mind clearly.

Tennessee had known that some gang members were lurking around, looking for an opportunity. He received this car from Alejandro, so it would be easy to track. He was thinking of creating a suitable situation.

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Since there would be many more gang members, the child might get hurt in the confusion. But collateral damage always happens. Tennessee held his breath while hiding his appearance.

‘You didn’t eat breakfast today either, did you?’

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It was just tightening a loose screw, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that the loosened screw was falling to the ground.

It was about 15 minutes after Tennessee had been waiting that two unfamiliar cars pulled up.

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The child had been sticking to the hotel all along, and if he came out, he would accompany him inside, so it’s no wonder these guys were getting impatient. These idiots wouldn’t even imagine that this was a trap. They must have hastily decided that they needed to deal with it now, not knowing when another opportunity would come again. Tennessee smirked and waited for them.

Two cars stopped, but someone got out of only one. Bandana, pants worn low. A swaggering gait. That sight would make anyone laugh.

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After quickly talking in Spanish, they confirmed the child was alone and their movements quickened.

“They say there’s no copy of the car key?”

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“No. We’ll have to break the window and drag him out.”

It was around then that the child noticed the presence of those approaching. Tennessee could hear their argument. Their movements to open the closed door became violent. Rough, intimidating voices. English and Spanish were mixed haphazardly.

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With one ear open to those sounds, Tennessee moved quickly. They must have come to keep watch, but those left in the car were rather watching the kidnapping. There weren’t as many people as he thought. They must have thought it would be easy since it was just kidnapping one child.

He was once a soldier, a mercenary, and an experienced hitman. Except for the fact that they move around in packs, gang members were no different from young juvenile delinquents to Tennessee.

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Just break the window already! While they were arguing, the child’s voice, which had been heard occasionally, grew louder.

“Don’t do it!”

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“Shut up.”

Finally, the ear-splitting sound of shattering. Timed with that, Tennessee pulled the trigger. The person sitting in the driver’s seat noticed something was wrong and turned his body, but it was too late. There were only two people in the car.

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The child’s screaming sank into his ears, maybe because he got scratched by the broken glass, or because he was being handled roughly. Tennessee, who had quickly taken care of the two, raised his eyes. The child was struggling, desperately resisting.

“Let go!”

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“Won’t you shut up?”

“Let go! I said let go!”

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The child’s cry pierced clearly through the rapid Spanish. It burst out, cutting through the air in an instant. He was calling him.

“Tennessee!”

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“Didn’t I tell you to shut up?!”

A blow without hesitation turned the child’s cheek. Gasping for air, a man struck the child’s face repeatedly before clenching his fist.

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They probably don’t intend to kill him anyway. Considering that the child is valuable, they’ll likely kidnap him first to lure him in. Then after dealing with him, they’ll probably use the child for drug trafficking or minor tasks like they do with other kidnapped children. If they were going to kill him, they would have shot him already, so he just needed to follow them. This was the quickest and most efficient way.

“Tenne-, ugh, Tennessee!”

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The child cried out, curling up his whole body. A sudden overload hit his head. It felt like his coldly functioning reason was stumbling and tripping over stones.

“Tennessee! Tennessee! Tennessee!”

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At that moment, he realized he wasn’t being rational. However, Tennessee moved instinctively without a second thought. Tennessee’s gun barrel rose up.

“Tennessee!”

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The child who had been shouting while covering their head gasped for breath. The indiscriminate violence that had been pouring down suddenly became quiet as if a button had been pressed. It felt like his heart would leap out. The sobbing child slowly raised his head.

The man who had been pulling him down and striking his cheek just moments ago was lying on the ground. It was like last time. A futile and empty death. Surprisingly simple. How can death be this easy…

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The child raised his head, panting. Familiar shoes come into view. It was Tennessee.

“Te-Tennessee… hic, Tennessee.”

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The left cheek that had been hit multiple times started to hurt as if it had caught fire belatedly. Rough emotions that were hard to explain in words rushed in. Sorrow, relief, anger. As the tension that had been at its limit relaxed, the child was overwhelmed by the words rushing into his mind simultaneously and couldn’t open his mouth to speak.

The child spread his arms. Tennessee was a man who rarely made contact, but it seemed like he would willingly hug him now. He remembered that firm and warm embrace.

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With arms spread, the expected warmth didn’t come. Instead, there was the bitter cigarette smoke. Tears obscured his vision, making it impossible to see Tennessee’s expression. The child painfully raised his aching arm to wipe away tears.

“Where, hnng, where did you go?”

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Resentment burst out towards Tennessee who didn’t hug him. A thank you should come first, and he certainly felt relief, but what came out first was a complaint.

You told me to stay here. I almost got into big trouble. Some men came and broke the window. They tried to take me away, Tennessee. Where did you go, where did you go leaving me behind? Don’t go away now.

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He tried to speak while holding back tears, but all that came back was the smoke. The child, bravely wiping away tears, seemed to hear a sigh within the smoke.

Finally, a hand reached out. Unlike his warm embrace, his touch was cold.

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Tennessee lifted the child up with one hand in a single motion. Held in his arms, the child finally burst into loud sobs. He tried hard to wipe away the tears, but it was useless. They flowed down endlessly, as if a faucet had been turned on.