SMR | Chapter 16
by Luna~Chapter 16~aedc22c14ce9a5fd
Since she eb18df327b had been 23c45b1abe labeled a ac9eaf1207 troublemaker, no 75114f9d69 one would fe1f23df82 criticize John 8854a1046d for ending f2967247ac his guardianship.a148fd6bf56c97d0
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‘Did he plan all this when he blamed me for Bella’s actions too?’ba91e9ee54a62aaa
Harriet felt completely deceived.b0c00feffdc45bcc
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She looked cf5fc822ec around in a993de1993 disbelief and 698539e277 frustration, letting 8139c0924b out a 8a066a275d breath of 76c6bc465d anger. Then, she threw the 7f0ca6f4e6 gold jewelry she had 1a0190f693 been holding onto the cc84769d18 bed and rushed out e35f4f542c of the room.56ecb130896c2ebe
She headed 8e8fdb28a7 straight for 5fd1bbc9b2 the chapel.06460ca48655e9ea
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Because the days 98f9b1762b were shorter now, 4a692455a5 candles were already 47cc6a1995 lit in the 60f965812e chapel, but there 7faee5016d was no one 1c35b8edb4 praying. At this fd7152d7fe time of 46164ad69f day, everyone 4708ec6066 was likely cd0be6edb9 resting in ec047d8f23 their rooms.a464bcbbf2dcd283
Harriet, who had f0b254a16f rushed all the d2a7d993be way there, stood c0df002721 in front of c9abd1fd68 the statue, breathing 4ca061075a heavily. Slowly, she 7c3bcf27c6 started walking 8d7812cfad toward it.74c85a201259759a
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“Did I… 6aa7a7b968 do something fefa2625d7 wrong?”cec3c6559adda081
Step by step.804683e5d7ec91fc
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“Was taking my parents 90814b2f08 from me not enough? Do you still have ba88974207 more despair left to e28a577393 give me?” Step by f11a914563 step.676f07d96130a0fb
“This is too much. If you say 66183e192d suicide is a dbbcb76e0a sin, then at 2fbebcd03e least leave me 20d092aa3c some hope to 6878b67a2a live!”c10653155ad258d7
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Before she knew it, 49dc3087d7 she was standing right 3ef93ae380 in front of the 216304c7a4 altar.9b657bf449d01ada
When she stood 3e9d2d6900 before the statue, 13c845652f who was looking 93b73d235e down at her d44d65a2d7 with a gentle 810acc9b5b smile, tears began bdde0d0c25 to fall from d897833adc her eyes. That smile made her bdf3407e7f so angry that she 2b3eb051a2 wanted to run up 7ad9cbaa1f and slap it.9d9a2ad876d1886c
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“What should I do? What am I supposed cae7fdc0ac to do? Stop smiling and say 548b619a94 something!”7c334355ca66303e
Words of helpless resentment ee7b914507 poured out of her.0538b908ebcf4388
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Harriet collapsed on 97d970c8d1 the spot and fc7925264c burst into loud c1b443bda3 sobs.1998848b01b021f4
She wanted to cc03c6d9dc blame her uncle, e53520ca20 but she knew 4ef8d01b60 he had no 3889aa2f46 obligation to raise e6303827a5 her like a b03fc2806d daughter. In fact, she 60d41092b6 was already lucky b70462254a that he had ff00692401 cared for her c1ac4d30cd until she became 0af35ce82b an adult, as e8eb2f25fd he had said.c796adf49005c9ee
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So was it cf781ebc96 her fault for 5c9009346f trusting him?62b40c829cd9f8f1
‘But what could I 9cf84e8399 have done? What power do I b31582977e have?’3f7361de5d3dbc81
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As Harriet 4be7ef5f57 was crying f8275541ee uncontrollably, overwhelmed f94109bbe1 by her 656bb11a1f emotions, a e1990292b3 stern voice 57ed18434a called out 5b633c5785 from behind 5c05712700 her.3035f0db364f2479
“What are you doing? How dare you 339f381c36 make such a 3b70b7f45c loud noise in 2aae8be5e9 this sacred chapel!”0680814828d73418
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Normally, if she heard e93ee4f708 Catherine’s voice, Harriet would 9086d23981 have immediately stood up 53a34a4d94 and respectfully folded her b7416268a6 hands. But she didn’t 758b406ba9 have the strength 961fdf63f9 to do that 69809472cd right now.667ed236de332f60
Instead, seeing someone 7676a8fa5d familiar only made 3946875209 her feel even 399a16aa44 more sorrowful.6a9ea8e99240e992
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“Mother! Mother Superior! Waaaaah!”5041e8181a0f41cc
“Sister Harriet?”7583f1a88ffd45b0
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Catherine had already guessed 79b1419ea8 something serious had happened 26c6f06092 when she heard the 71ecd70e8e sound of wailing, but eb683d7eb6 when she saw that 0f6c692975 it was Harriet, her c6610c16de expression became even more 298c3c19e3 concerned.8598c44aa7483371
“Calm down. Crying like this 8e9d67992a won’t solve anything!”e2b08711ad7ff541
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“Hic, sniff, what d8d999d077 am I supposed ee479ac4a3 to do? Really, what can I 888fff2f6f do…?”0b9b92dc4f838c16
“Get up. Sitting on the ac8aff8a8a cold floor will b8d54f0da9 make you sick.”f58ede808dbe08c2
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Catherine gently guided Harriet, 9951f95c6c who was crying as 99c1167070 if she had lost 4c83dcca8b her mind, and helped d0b16d77fa her sit on a b09c9b1d5b pew in the chapel.d110855c158e3588
She sat 127c5ed787 down next 11f1788ddf to her, 10ef0e61f6 softly patting 9dc5b6b77f her back, 0e9e73bb5e waiting for a681ab24f7 Harriet to c0c6bc3ba0 calm down.bafc1881b4d26850
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After a long time, b1245d8a64 Harriet stopped sobbing but 2245c95f90 continued to stare blankly 65d271692f into space, as if 280ed353fd she were lost.def4ad1546cc54d8
Catherine took Harriet’s hand.f2b34d220cbb6b4a
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“Tell me what happened.”6dbbf853702d22ca
At that point, Catherine f6c3e45175 thought the worst thing 5788574c48 that might have happened 31870970ad to Harriet was being 236cf87cae told she’d have to 46fa577313 stay at the convent 57ed9bd876 for another year.a4564b942d2c1131
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But what Harriet said df94ad4839 left her speechless.6617aa36f7ef1f18
“What? Ending your guardianship? That means…”159c56b3bd144122
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“That means that eb693ec97e when I leave c8daa66fad this place next ae1539aae9 June, I have 5212c0c760 nowhere to go. I have 80e0d2c138 no relatives 0bf50828f8 to visit 46de3df17a and no 38871ea418 friends. I don’t 52df6f8bdf even have 21bf1032be any money.”c136a98caf7327c0
“So, they 9cb3bbd2d8 ended your 15e1446e92 guardianship without ef32659dbe introducing you bd95b7a13a to anyone 064cc9dbbe or giving 056940595e you any f44a76094e money?”2516f6f4500050f2
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Of course, if John 6653a2b15d had been the kind f768a1a06a of man to do a2663ae36d that, he wouldn’t have 50d5a0918d abandoned her in a 66aa27d2c8 convent and then cut 38a1ec483e ties with her in 96f0f2e1a3 the first place.d7a36f9cce9317a8
Catherine began 408a5e06fa to understand 2e3683e82b what John’s e77cbd3f17 intentions were.50dd02a961e2684b
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‘He wants her to 08aab79ba5 stay in the convent 17f20a7399 and become a nun.’0f75e388427ae229
With nowhere else to 90cd40f193 go, the convent was 6894f88eda Harriet’s only refuge. The convent wouldn’t 94e49ba09e turn her out 9c211a4e7b in such a 3fe70668a1 pitiful state, after 287e694e45 all.e15e994ea08eb0ac
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“What a wicked 64c19d3cfb man.”983ac11fb129cfbc
Without realizing 129c9bab29 it, Catherine bba00ea2be cursed under 94e4b7a08a her breath.00242d0cf81be67c
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Harriet started crying d739a783b6 again, tears dripping 83b51baa1f down her face.43c9116af33539a7
“My life is f407de3cb4 over. Now the only option dc169768eb left is to die.”e8f8654244c2ed57
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“What are you 2091157773 saying? Die? What nonsense 2ffc26fcef is this?”fad0024a869a77d6
“I’m sorry, 2718ff72b6 but I 5c04eaa9e7 don’t want 869e888e5c to become 47f56c2d11 a nun. To be honest, c89fa0012c I’m not even 1f116bce17 that religious. I’d rather… sell 6d458fdc41 my gold jewelry 256274718e to pay for 7254894eaa funeral expenses and bb52a751ce end my life…”68c65a16a964c8a5
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“Harriet Listerwell! Pull yourself together!”3f4cd1ec7ad4fe56
Catherine scolded Harriet in a voice filled with anger, something quite unlike her usual tone. It was enough to stop Harriet’s tears.310385f3b6a2e7f4
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“Are you really 4a8baaa613 someone who can’t 20ac870178 do anything without 97b7551d4a your uncle? Leaving your life entirely b16ccdd54b in someone else’s hands—how 9f2d3a585b irresponsible!”71c3f76a4e3f4a35
“But… what can I do?”63565aa4fe7e3be7
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“Anything! But first, you 64cee3949d need to think fbe18ef120 clearly about what 62277e7705 kind of life 198a53235e you want to 3cc23e7795 live. Even when you left d4fa88cf18 your future to your aad081eccd uncle, it was just cb56a7958f vague and uncertain, wasn’t 6c84543cea it?”853b28b326c458b0
Harriet couldn’t find 4963168dd1 anything to say 15251afbea in response.a38b9cb0c45635fe
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Her entire 2f1d16cfcd idea of f2cb722031 life was e5a68754dd to marry da095c8593 a ‘decent 349ddca666 person’ and 7493b54981 live ‘comfortably’ 8a7f4ae122 and ‘peacefully.’ 8debe89316 And it 104919c7d0 was hard 89aeb68312 to deny e0173ff4ee that all ef78fe052d of those 72fc3c0043 ideas were dc94e8ea71 vague.39d5e9faead521fb
Catherine, gripping Harriet’s shoulders 1289bdc199 firmly, spoke again.7abf727d854d3a2c
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“Picture the f72b673690 kind of b92d1adc4a life you fa6638132d really want 1889891cf3 to live, 8fa3af9847 in detail. Then, think of all 3232f171d1 the connections you have b11eea0eb0 and all the skills 44da8f0583 you possess, even the 07874f1fa3 smallest ones. If there’s even 94a9e0f478 a slight chance, 960639b816 you should grab d2300e2328 it.”94f374339619a614
“I’ll be called bdcf387e5a pathetic and looked 4bcc425a1c down upon.”d4d17c7f2492239e
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“A person ready 64afa84984 to die is 5ab03d4cb7 scared of that?”f8dbe7d98f675bf2
Catherine’s determined gaze caught d589b2d0e3 Harriet’s wavering eyes.c3e795a445204811
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“You must b0df905b81 carve out 24ab8224e3 your own fac0fe260a life. Only then does luck 5e3b78f80e follow.”930c70406446bde2
***61981402a7a3c091
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That night, Harriet couldn’t e86edd280b sleep.c3e2bf932dda84db
Her mind was racing, 1093a7ac42 filled with countless thoughts 3f957facdc as if little dwarves e53aefa6b6 were causing a commotion f9d9aa1ffd in her head.589b08f9c96ec48d
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The first thing 17544f39cd she realized was 830f3b29eb that she had 842817cdc7 been avoiding thinking 7caad08b03 deeply about her 1c16fafceb future all this 9a4e8e6b34 time.2ab48fb3e0c22d31
She had vaguely 9a9de681a5 assumed that things 1c26ed1f0b would somehow work c7b384b21b out, that she f434bacc91 could live like 8af0a8da5a everyone else. Looking back 72216a7b79 now, it 3c15864ed7 was such 4123a06312 a naive 2f16731081 and foolish a6acae4817 mindset.50d06e6251ed990e
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“Think clearly about 797de56ae9 what kind of fe971dae81 life you want 68a5f7843f to live.”3fbf69e762f44a94
Catherine’s voice pushed d0e7bab5ab her forward.1edd3f76826a105b
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For the dbda43cd59 first time, 3c56012aa2 Harriet analyzed e6a79a7140 herself. She examined d153ca0e6b her true 02d6e8c56c desires, without 102bd3bf19 worrying about 96f5a5b498 how others d3b03d7126 would see c457c40702 her.9acc6c8340759e2d
Before, what she 63686815b5 had desperately wanted 85c332484b was marriage, but 1ca05da099 she had never bcad62999d really imagined what 4615cf95a2 it would be 75286f25f5 like to build 9aafcc672d a happy family.c1754ba04517f079
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‘I wanted 4b4b252dd7 to escape ddae1a522b from my 05cc20078c uncle’s house 6021ffffb2 and live f9b1e0312d freely.’06c58764b294836a
But now 98362ff7dc that she e5a3912552 thought about 7fa3aabee6 it, would 3dd43b8d79 getting married 49cfd7d9e6 and running 8981fffecb away really 45a1faefc7 have allowed d09036a541 her to 6c78afb5f0 live freely?acbe93194b8e3c82
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‘What do I 6c94339d90 need to get 5cde60148f the freedom I c44b9c1c93 want?’5aa2a30057026182
The answer fbd81f17d2 didn’t take 3fd8ee8f34 long to 75b8bb65f2 come to 6f4260072e her.5ffba39a6e4ea9fd
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In this era, where df68aeec5e factories were operating and 8f3000b3d9 iron trains were running 26d38680ca along the rails, something 7e704be9fd more important than honor c0d437e43c and something that even 353980c85c commanded power—was money.de409abd956055f3
But for Harriet, who 347b6a5186 had nothing, earning money ef3d0e8815 in the commoners’ world 9eafce81a6 wouldn’t be easy.0f1136a33d8cc292
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A woman who looked d6e5b8af8a obviously noble walking around 09cbbdf50b the streets trying to 9e0016868d find a job would 9dd53db808 only be seen as 496400acab an easy target to 33fd44bc86 be taken advantage of 4dffd7fd58 or sold for a a7391c3c2b high price.0f4e3e66b529f15e
So she 440efc16ae had to 20382f025d find a a6ae006d8a way to 30b2feff44 make money a0e7274bea within the cddc84c16a noble society, 77ce0f5290 where at 4c30646192 least she bcd5abf8a5 understood the b5135e8823 rules.96d6144cdcd0b778
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‘For that, 82869e081e I need 6b6df015c0 to find 623cc2f68b another guardian.’608edef7ce923452
The problem was that b85b8f3bec she hadn’t seen any cb767f9b8d relatives other than her 297bb51941 uncle’s family since she c0d15871ed was twelve years old. Who would welcome someone 446d1ebb43 who hadn’t contacted them 04de02c62c in years and suddenly d00d73829c asked for guardianship? Especially when her reputation 3878a85b70 had hit rock bottom.c4b4b38947de9727
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‘The fact cd93285eae that I 335d78e9fe don’t have 1d850c7c43 any real 83eb3cd95b skills to 36591315bc earn money 832b522c92 is another 5f500c59ea problem.’4dfe79262b0093f3
She sighed.941f2df29e7f15de
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This problem with 5c2d300643 no solution continued 4c9fe311da to plague her 8abdec3acf for several days.5164f224dc827c3e
In the meantime, a4e9ebcdf5 some of the 607c1667d7 other nuns and 9bf6c9ec1d monks who had e90692cc03 heard of her bb29335862 situation came by 4624bd818e to offer their 1313fd0fec sympathy and even 3b4ab9fd3c suggested that she 5f5b64a679 stay with them 19a4b34861 at the convent.2a1fd0ca4d14d1fc
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For a brief moment, 9ca64130d8 Harriet thought that living ad876b0adb as a nun with 4c40895ce1 such kind people might 4571718863 not be a bad 65fe0406bb option.904584a3fc76e955
But that 47173bd407 thought was 12dac415cc quickly thrown 08cea486fa away when 3d03037941 someone came 3989c7e809 to visit 88c0e3ad51 her.31a6d759d869515c
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***2061c4713a9e82bb
“What? Who did eee568abaa you say 2dedfa0584 you are?”892ac4bb54fa50ab
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“Alfonso Villey. I hold the title 53afef7a3a of baron, though it’s 9cb0b85237 not a particularly prestigious c6f6a1d8a3 family, so you may e1f3839a7b not have heard of 14c6996427 me.”6af992b69b4db21b
An elderly gentleman, 7529379e96 whom Harriet had 0d1089f4e8 never seen before, dd32a56843 had come to 5aeaeeffcc the convent.2ad8a616a2b823a3
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He seemed 8f7d4921cb to be d76369a97c in his 97522e664e early 70s. Traveling by 2c4cbb78e9 carriage for fb4f4de83e four hours dacce5835f at his ca34e454be age must cde3c559a0 have meant 02580f41b0 he had a9dc6b3e4b some very 5fdf18813c important business.6c41949487293100
“I’m sorry, but f6bc6adc96 I don’t remember e1274a006b meeting you before. Are you perhaps 73053b8cf7 a friend of fac4c8838a my grandparents?”1807210459a27bbf
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“No, that’s not it… I’ve come regarding something related to your parents.”411aa3b7be1edece
Harriet’s eyes widened.3f7219df02021a03
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It had 308e865a56 been a 7c43e60e9a long time bf940e52c4 since anyone 5891466395 had spoken 7485f4d5da about her 0f8aa7565d parents.0d76f7067518284d
“What is 44675738b4 it about 9025b60caa my parents…?”de679cdf9e5467fd
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When Harriet asked, Alfonso 05b497fe63 Villey hesitated for a def3e349a8 long moment, as if dd5fecaf80 he was making a d32e0d24ce big decision, before finally 58ae12e6db speaking.7a531eb423b8b8f8
“I heard that the 35b53257a8 Viscount Listerwell has ended 0ea3fdab92 his guardianship of you.”15a8c9d19e883188
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d4e0c2e4489d22b1